Almost Lover
How could she have been so blind? She should have realized ages ago that Stefan didn't have any feelings for her. Maybe friendship-feelings and she wasn`t even sure about that anymore. For god`s sakes, they had gone through all that before, when he first showed up in Mystic Falls. She had hit on him and he had told her that it would never happen. He had chosen Elena over her. Like everyone always chose someone or something over her. She was never good enough. Why should Stefan be the big exception?
Really, what had she been expecting? That he`d suddenly discover his undying love for her? He had left Mystic Falls without a backward glance. He hadn`t answered one of her many calls. Had never called back. Never even listened to the countless messages she`d left him. Seeing him living his new life, with his new girlfriend should have cured her of any false hope she still might`ve had. But no, she couldn`t give up on him so easily.
When he`d shown up today she had really thought for one stupid moment that he`d come to apologize. To make it up to her. Even if he didn`t love her they were still friends, right? Only that they weren`t. He hadn`t come to apologize. Hadn`t even really wanted to talk to her. He`d come to kill Enzo, so he could go back to his new live, pretending his old friends back in Mystic Falls no longer existed. Pretending she no longer existed.
Caroline drew her legs up to her chest and sniffled. Night had fallen, but from where she was sitting on the forest floor she could still hear the noise of the party, the laughter, the music and the splashing of water. Elena was probably still there, having a fun time living in blissful ignorance. She knew she should join the brunette. Be the supportive friend Elena needed right now. But she just couldn`t bring herself to get up from her hiding spot and put on a brave face. She had a right to be miserable and selfish every once in a while.
Why did she have to fall in love with Stefan? She should have known she was only setting herself up for a fall. Why couldn`t she just see him as a friend, like she had done for the past couple of years? Things would be bad enough if they were only friends. But these unwanted feelings made Stefan`s rejection nearly unbearable.
Was it really so hard to love her? Was she really asking too much? Looking back on her previous boyfriends she decided, yes, she obviously was. Because not one of them had loved her enough in the end. All of them had left her. Had chosen something or someone over her. Alex, her first ever boyfriend, had left her for slutty Sophie of all people.
Matt had left her, because he couldn`t bear the thought of dating a vampire. Couldn`t even stand being close to her. All he had seen in her was the monster. And then he`d gone on a trip through Europe with an original vampire, who had almost killed him before. And Caroline was sure that he wouldn`t have had these qualms if it had been Elena and not her.
Tyler had left her to get revenge on Klaus. Once again she hadn`t been enough. His revenge plans had been more important than her. And then she`d only made it worse by sleeping with Klaus. Who had left her to return to New Orleans and play king of the city. He hadn`t even asked her to come with him. He had promised she would never see him again, if she gave in to him once. Which meant all he`d ever really wanted was to bed her. So much for wanting to be her last love.
Stefan never really gave her a chance. She couldn`t count him among her boyfriends. But he had been one of her best friends. One constant in her life for so long. And then he too had left her. Left her to start a new life. And now she was utterly alone. All of her friends were either dead or had moved on, leaving her stuck to wallow in misery all alone.
Caroline startled when someone sat down next to her. She looked up to see Enzo holding a tissue out to her. Feeling embarrassed for being caught bawling by him yet again she took the tissue and turned away. "Thanks for saving my ass earlier." the dark haired vampire drawled. Caroline dabbed her eyes and shrugged. "Wouldn`t have figured the jerk to be quite so vindictive." Enzo continued and she finally looked at him again. Her make-up was surely ruined, but he`d already seen her like this and right now she just couldn`t bring herself to care.
"You can`t really be surprised. You killed his girlfriend." she pointed out. "And don`t call him jerk." she added as an afterthought. "Only obeying your rules, gorgeous. Never mention that jerk`s name again or you`ll kill me, remember?" Caroline had to smile despite herself. Yes, that had been exactly her words. Of course he would remember that.
"Why did you do it?" she suddenly found herself asking. She had been too shocked to ask earlier, when she had found out that he`d killed Stefan`s girlfriend. She wasn`t really sure she wanted to know. She hadn`t even asked him why he had dragged her to Savannah in the first place. Maybe she would`ve been better off not knowing what Stefan was really doing, instead of searching for a way to bring back Damon and Bonnie.
Enzo was giving her a weird look and seemed to be debating with himself what to say. "Because he made you cry." he said finally, taking her completely by surprise. She had expected some bullshit about being angry at Stefan for giving up on his brother. Or even being mad because Stefan had snapped his neck. She would`ve never thought she might be the reason. And she also didn`t believe it. "Seriously? Because he made me cry?"
"Why so shocked, goldilocks? Didn't you think me capable of defending your honor?" he joked. Caroline rolled her eyes. "Very funny, Enzo. Tell me the real reason." Caroline demanded. "That is the real reason. Yeah, I was mad at him for giving up on Damon and I promised him hell for that. But killing his girl? I did that to hurt him. Because he had hurt you. Someone as sweet as you should never have to get hurt like that." Enzo explained. And he sounded and looked so sincere that she believed him this time.
He had done it for her. And while Caroline knew she should feel appalled by his behavior, she couldn`t help feeling a little elated as well. Maybe she wasn`t all alone after all. Maybe there was still someone she could rely on. Even if said someone was a psychotic killer. "You can`t keep running around and killing people." she chastised. Enzo grinned. "I love your morals, gorgeous." She could feel herself blushing and cursed him for it. "I`m surprised you even recognize morals. Since you obviously don`t have any." she shot back, but he only laughed.
Still, she couldn`t really be mad at Enzo. Like she told Elena earlier today, he was lately becoming one of the most stable people in her life. And considering the fact that he was anything but stable that was saying something. He was there when she needed him, offering comfort in his own, weird way. He had hurt Stefan for hurting her. And while she couldn`t approve of his methods she did appreciate the gesture.
Glancing at him again she also couldn`t help but notice his good looks. She knew that he was hot, even if she had never allowed herself to really notice it before. His dark eyes bore into her blue ones, making her shiver under the intensity of his gaze. A devilish smile was playing about this lips, like he knew exactly what she was thinking.
God, this was such a bad idea. And maybe she only noticed him now because she wanted to forget about her silly crush on Stefan. On the other hand Damon had been right about one thing: She did have a thing for bad boys.
Tyler had never really been one of the good ones. Klaus was probably the baddest of them all. And she had felt drawn to Damon even before his compulsion, despite knowing that he spelled trouble. Enzo clearly fit her type. But she couldn`t go down that road again. No matter how caring he might act now, he would only end up hurting her. Just like everyone else.
"I didn`t kill that waitress." Enzo broke the sudden tense silence that had fallen between them. Caroline blinked in surprise, knowing exactly what he was talking about. "I snatched, ate, erased. She`s fine." he assured. "But… why did you let me believe you killed her?" she wanted to know. Enzo shrugged. "To rile you up. You`re awfully cute when you get mad." Caroline gasped indignantly and punched him hard on the shoulder. "You`re an ass."
"Mostly." he conceded and she had to smile despite herself. "Besides.. I wanted to take your mind off of your problems. And I succeeded. You were busy being all self-righteous and mad at me and stopped thinking about the jerk for a while." Enzo reasoned. She bristled at the self-righteous comment, but still couldn`t come up with a suitable reply. Despite being an ass and a psychopathic killer he could be strangely sweet sometimes.
"Just forget him, Caroline. He doesn`t deserve you." Enzo argued, giving her that intense look again. It was probably the first time he had actually used her name. She sighed and without really thinking about it leaned against his shoulder. He might be right about that. She should just forget about Stefan. Enzo wrapped and arm around her and kissed her temple. It felt nice to be comforted like that and for once Caroline decided not to overthink things and just go with it.
Maybe she and Enzo could just be friends. Maybe they would be more. Maybe he would end up leaving her, like all the guys before him. Maybe he wouldn`t. Right now she didn`t really care. For now she would allow him to comfort her and enjoy his company. She would take his advice and try to forget about Stefan. And tomorrow they would continue their search for a way to bring Bonnie and Damon back. Everything else would fall into place eventually.