A one shot - that is based on what went on at the hospital; when Eli was waiting to see if Julia was going to be okay.
I decided to write this, because a few months ago - a very
close friend of mine passed away. I love her so much, and
I'd like to dedicate this story to her.
I love you, and miss you more then anything.
Your Memory Is The Sunshine
Every New Day Brings
Hospitals always frightened me.
I would pretend like I wasn't scared - I had an image, one that showed that I had no fears or cares - but when it came to hospitals, it was hard to even pretend that I didn't tremble at the very thought.
The walls were white, the floors were white, the chairs were black - and tears seemed to be falling out of every ones eyes. I had only been to the hospital for necessary appointments. I had never lost some one. I had always had the blessing of never losing some one I cared for.
But here I sit - two AM, on a Thursday night.
My lips are colder then ice, my breath being just as cold, my hands shaking continuously, my foot tapping the floor, and my eyes were more red then blood - with tears streaming out of them; staining my pale skin.
All my beliefs and thoughts of how lucky I am - have been thrown out the window and stepped all over. I was on the verge of losing some one. I was about to lose the one person that I care about the most. I needed her, more then anything. I can't lose her - I refuse to lose her.
I stared at the floor - refusing to make eye contact or stare at anyone, for that matter. I was disgusted with myself.
The very last thing, that I had said to her, was - "Go ahead - leave! See how much I care!"
How could I say that to her? I care more then anything. How could I allow myself to stoop so low - as she road off, in the pitch dark, on her bicycle. I had allowed the greatest person to ever come in to my life, to ride away - unprotected from the harsh world.
I had allowed her life to be put in danger - and I never thought twice. I never had thought that she could get hurt. I thought that the next day, we were going to apologize and forgive each other for fighting. Instead, I'm sitting here - praying for her life to continue.
I am so selfish. I am so completely and insanely selfish. I yelled at that girl - I kept yelling, even when she was crying - I never thought once about how badly my words were effecting her. She was so angry and sad about the entire fight. It was our first fight ever; and it was about a stupid boy, who had been trying to take her away from me, for months now.
I can't believe we fought for the first time - and it may be the last time I talked or saw her.
I looked to my right - to see her mother and father sitting next to one another. Her fathers arms were wrapped around her mom, while their heads were resting against one anothers - they held hands - as they cried, so extremely hard.
I looked to my left - and saw Amy, her best friend, sitting there. Her make up was every where, and tears rolled from her eyes; making marks on her red cheeks. She had her knees pressed up against her chest, as her hands rested on the sides of her head.
I felt sick to my stomach. Looking at how sad every one around me was - made me feel even worse about myself. I looked back at the floor - staring at every one else was unbearable.
I needed a doctor to come out here and inform me that she was okay - she was completely alive and stable. I needed to hear those three words - "She will live". I just wanted to know that I would hear her voice again. I can't lose her.
A doctor walked towards us - I prayed to God that he would be telling me she was okay. He stopped in front of the four of us, and let out a deep breath.
"Are you the family of Julia Williams?" He asked, I couldn't speak - I was completely speechless.
"Yes sir." Mr. Williams spoke up - as Mrs. Williams stood up from her chair; covering her mouth with her hands.
"Julia's injury was.. unrepairable." He paused, "I am so sorry." With those very words, Mrs. Williams collapsed to her knees, as she let out a loud cry.
My jaw practically hit the floor and I became dizzy. I felt as if every thing was in slow motion, as silence took over for a moment. I suddenly, bursted out in to tears; covering my face with my hands.
I was capable of hearing the cries from every one around me - and it made me feel even worse.
I lost her.
I lost Julia, the girl that I had been dating for over a year now. I lost my best friend, my girlfriend, the greatest person to ever be in my life.
She made every bad day - an amazing one. Every time I was about to go insane - she was there. Julia had done every thing in her power to keep me safe and she was always there to pick up the pieces, when ever I felt like it was impossible to put them back together.
When my parents divorced and my father left - without saying goodbye - Julia came over to my house and slept over for a week straight. She would do things, that were against her parents wishes, just to make me happy.
She was my every thing. And now she's gone.
I will never get over her.
She'll forever be with me.