Stephanie and Jason welcome Damian to the Bad Robins Club. Short and sweet and heavily sarcastic.

Rated G. Batfamily feels ftw!

A one-shot inspired by a prompt from my Promptastic Challenge over on Ao3. Please feel free to submit a prompt for me over there! Or to use one for your own one-shot. ;)

Bad Robins Club

"You won't believe what's happened!" Stephanie chirped when he answered his phone. He didn't even get a chance to greet her.

Jason sighed, "Did Tim finally crash?" That wouldn't shock him, but the photos would be amusing. He twisted around in his sheets, detangling.

He sat up in bed, pressing his free hand to his eyes to wipe away the sleep.

"No!" Stephanie giggled. Jason could here the springs of her bed as she moved.

"Have you been to sleep yet, Steph?" Jason smirked as Stephanie scoffed. That was a no.

"Really, Red?" Stephanie feigned offense, "And here I was going to tell you about the new addition to our club!"

Jason arched an eyebrow, "Club?" He switched the phone to his other ear as he got out of bed. and on the wall as he moved - his taped ribs still protested.

"The Bad Robins Club," Stephanie's voice took on a reverent tone. Jason chuckled. He'd forgotten about that. It was a good memory. That bar had never been the same.

"I thought you had to be stripped of the Robin titled before you could join?" Jason shuffled into his kitchen. He opened his fridge to grab a water bottle, "Did Damian kill someone?"

Still not shocking, there might be good video of Dick freaking out about it. Bruce would bottle it up and deprive them all of the entertainment.

"Oh no," Stephanie cackled, "Better."

Jason perked up, spine straightening, "Do tell." He grimaced as his ribs ached at the movement. This is why falling off of tall buildings is a bad idea.

"He undid all the padlocks at the zoo."

For a brief moment, they were silent. And then, like lightning split across the sky, Jason was doubled over laughing. His ribs screamed about it too. But it was worth it.

"Oh my god," Jason held on to the counter for balance, "That got Robin taken away?"

Stephanie's laughter hiccupped, "Batdad and Bro-wing spent all of last night getting it under control." She giggled, "Oracle had to call in backup from the Birds and Commissioner Gordon had a lot to say from what I heard."

"Oh my god," Jason chortled, "Why did I skip patrol last night?!" Ribs be damned, this was a once in a lifetime occurence. He was more likely to die again than see such chaos repeated!

"You know it's bad when Catwoman and Ivy come to help out." Stephanie giggled, the springs of her bed squeaking loudly again.

They stopped suddenly.

"Don't you have broken ribs?"

Jason scoffed, "Bruised mostly."

"You can't see me, but I'm rolling my eyes at you."

"Noted," Jason grinned and leaned back against his kitchen counter, "So, important question, is there video?"

It was Stephanie's turn to scoff, "Of course. Babs has Gotham itself bugged, plus I took a few sleuthy photos for myself."

"Movie night?" Jason offered as he pushed off to head for the bathroom.

"After the induction ceremony."

Jason paused. "What?!"

-.-.-

Damian growled at his window. Still closed despite the appearance of Stephanie Brown on the other side. She was not dressed in her Batgirl persona and had been indulging in funny faces and pouting for the last three minutes.

"I will not be subjected to anymore mockery!" Damian snapped, leaning forward as he yelled at the window. Stephanie jumped, likely from the sudden noise rather than any understanding of his actual words. His father would hardly have thin windows.

Stephanie puckered her lips and scrunched her eyebrows together. Damian was certain she would make an attempt to open the window from the outside - a foolhardy attempt as he had secured it himself and she would be unable to do so.

A small notepad was produced from one of her pockets. The pencil that occupied the spiral was tiny and dull.

Damian blinked when she began scribbling and then proceeded to hold up the notepad - a few inches from the glass - with the words 'Ready for Initiation?' written in her horrific handwriting.

"What intiation?" Damian was more than willing, and completely able, to shove Brown from her perch when he opened the window. Brown smiled at him.

It was a blinding grin that Damian refused to admit he often times enjoyed.

-.-.-

Stephanie was surprised how quickly Damian had agreed to come with her. Since she hadn't told him where they were going or why she assumed it was curiosity more than anything else.

"Tsk," Damian's chin rose high into the air when they stopped on the edge of the Wayne manner property. He looked up expectantlt at her, "What now Brown?"

"We wait for the founding member of the Bad Robins Club." Stephanie enjoyed the way his face went slack jawed. She enjoyed even more how quickly it twisted back up when Jason drove up from the manner, in one of Bruce's cars. A convertible - red, with leather seats.

"Get in, Losers," Jason smirked at them.

Stephanie giggled and shoved Damian into the front seat before jumping in the back. She kicked her feet up on the center console as Jason sped off.

Damian crossed his arms and, face pinched, looked back at Stephanie, "Why have you kidnapped me?"

"Ha! Like you didn't come willingly, Demon Brat." Jason took one hand off the wheel to swat at his head. He missed, of course, because Damian had superior reflexes.

-.-.-

Stephanie might be glowing. She wasn't certain, but her insides were burning with happiness so it was a near thing if nothing else.

"Stop smiling Brown!" Damian growled from in front of her, "And tell me where we are going!" Stephanie mimed zipping her mouth shut as Jason took a turn too sharply. Damian had to catch himself on the dashboard.

"Didn't the League of Assassins teach you to respect your elders, Baby Bat?" Jason grinned as he took another turn, at an ungodly speed. Bruce's car had wonderful suspension.

Damian's face scrunched up, but he remained silent. Stephanie could see his shoulders straining as he preened under his preferred nickname.

Or, what she assumed was his preferred nickname. He didn't screech or scowl at it like he did 'Demon Brat' anyway.

When they stopped on the bridge Jason left the keys in the car and popped the trunk. Stephanie grabbed the duffle bag out and headed for the tower. Damian watched her climb up with leering eyes.

Jason ruffled Damian's hair and grinned at his indignant squawk before following Stephanie's lead.

"Hurry up, Demon Brat, we got things to do!"

Damian growled at Jason as he started climbing. Stephanie watched from her perch as the brothers squabbled, and hit.

This induction would top the last, for sure.

-.-.-

Tim slumped back in his chair as Stephanie jabbered on about spray paint and convertibles.

"Why aren't I in the Bad Robins Club?"

Stephanie raised an eyebrow at him, "Your name is Red ~Robin~ Tim, exactly when did Bruce take your mantle away?"

He squinted at her, "Dick-"

"Doesn't count." Stephanie hopped from the counter, big grin on her face as she stole his coffee cup out of his hand, "Nice try, ~Replacement~."

Tim bit his lip to keep from responding as she walked away, giggling. Copper taste in his mouth, "Don't call me that!"

She was spending way too much time with Jason.

Thanks for reading! Reviews Appreciated!