Summary: When Sasuke finds out Sakura can't bear him a heir he betrays her. What he wasn't aware of was the tangled web of deceit and lies that hurt not only Sakura, but himself as well.
Standard Disclaimer applies.
There are probably many typos that I will catch later, I just wanted to finally get this idea out of my head. So enjoy.
Chapter 1: Misunderstood
Wrapped up in warm satin sheets, Sakura smiled as she got ready to start her day. The smell of fresh morning dew and remnants of last nights lovemaking permeated through Sasuke's bedroom, as she lied still with her hands clutching his scent filled pillow. Finally deciding to throw off the black satin in an attempt to get ready, Sakura let out a loud yawn. All too familiar with the layout of the room, she gracefully walked up to the antique armoire and opened the right cabinet. Her medic attire was neatly stacked inside as she grabbed a uniform for work. Sasuke was no where to be seen and Sakura just reminisced about the way it felt to be wrapped up in his arms as the moonlight filled the bleakness of the bedroom. He was warm and filled her with emotion that no man could ever replace in her heart. He had showed her a side of him that she thought had disappeared when he had lost his family.
She paced down the stairs and out the door of Sasuke's apartment and headed to the hospital for her shift. Before heading to her office Sakura stopped for her routine check-up. Ever since Sasuke had gotten back he has implied that he wished to have a family with her, in hopes replacing what was forcibly taken from him. He placed his trust into Sakura, but also his desire to fill the void that exists in her heart whenever he rejected her advances in their younger days.
From the start of there relationship everyone knew how much they belonged to one another, it was believed that Sasuke and Sakura was etched in stone from the very beginning.
For months, they have been trying to have a baby, almost every other day they enjoyed the passion that sex entrails and the emotional connection it creates. And for months, Sakura had gotten the same exact news that, even though their lovemaking was filled with passion and love, it had yet to create a child for the both of them. And as time passed and no child was created, Sakura felt the feeling of dread that lurked in the depths of her heart grew larger as Sasuke drifted away from her.
"Haruno-san, I have your latest test results. Would you like me to place them on your desk?" A woman in a nurse's uniform asked.
"Yumi-chan, there is no need to be so formal, call me Sakura, or Sakura-chan if you prefer. And yes on my desk is fine." Sakura gleefully replied. The young nurse hurriedly placed the manila folder on the edge of Sakura's desk before quietly heading for the door.
Once Sakura heard the click of the door shutting, she gratefully stared at the folder sitting at the edge. Taking a deep breath in, she slowly reached of the folder, holding it still in her hands. Her eyes scanned the plain manila cover from the edge of the folder to the side with the name printed 'Haruno, Sakura'. This had to be the day, Sakura thought, the day that the test results would finally read "Congratulations, you Haruno, Sakura are expecting a child. Here below is a list of your doctor's appointments for the following nine months"
Sakura quickly shut her eyes is anticipation as her hands flipped open the folder. Taking a glance with one eye open, the other shut, she read her fate.
"We are sorry to inform you that the test results have came back negative for pregnancy. Infertility tests are available to woman who are experiencing frequent negative results."
She had taken those infertility tests, three to be precise. But she knew that sometimes these tests made mistakes and were not true. She couldn't be infertile. She just couldn't.
The feeling of dread once again accumulated in her heart and fear over took her mind. What would Sasuke think of her, she thought absentmindedly. However, deep inside Sakura knew the answer to that particular question. If Sasuke really did care for her then this whole ordeal wouldn't matter in the least, and he would still love her even though she wouldn't be able to carry his child.
The walk home to her apartment on the other side of town helped Sakura clear her mind and prepared her for what she was about to tell Sasuke. No matter how many times she played out the words in her head, she couldn't get it right. There was no right way, she thought, to tell the person who loved and believed in you, that you couldn't provide the one thing that they desired the most.
Upon entering her home, Sakura kicked off her boots and fell onto the couch desperately hoping that Sasuke wouldn't show tonight, as she shut her eyes tightly. The ticking of the clock continued it's journey slowly around the circumference of time and soon minutes became hours, and the rush of midnight air turned into morning dusk.
He never did come.
As Sakura rubbed the morning crust from her eyes she came to a realization that she had to come clean with Sasuke and tell him it may not be possible to have a child. Swallowing her fear she exited her living room in search for him, even though the feeling of dread rested in the pit of her stomach.
She had found him in the training ground, ANBU mask on the ground beside the wooden post he was currently training with. It seemed like he was there since the late hours of the night, judging by how his appearance made him seem like he had been dragged through hell and back.
With her eyes set on him she admired his fighting spirit, before reaching out to touch him.
"Sasuke," she whispered, as her arms brushed his shoulder. She watched as his whole body tensed under her touch, and she was taken back by the cold eyes that cut through her as he gazed back.
Gulping she continued, "We need to talk about a few things." Her eyes remained locked on the ground beside his feet, no once did she want to look upon his dark orbs in fear of seeing the disappointment that she knew resided there.
Peering down on her small frame Sasuke muttered a "Like what."
"The baby…I don't think…well it's hard to explain." Sakura murmured her words becoming a jumbled mess. Sasuke completely turned to face her, and his broad shoulders over shadowed her small frame, his appearance completely ragged and disheveled. She knew then and there she couldn't tell him the truth.
She knew that she had to lie.
Shutting his eyes momentarily, he took a deep breath before looking over her.
"Continue." The simplicity of his command didn't surprise Sakura in the least bit, he was a person of simplicity and in this situation she expected no other treatment from him.
" I don't think…I'm ready to have a child yet." Sakura lied. She not once did look in his eyes the fear swelling by the millions in her heart.
"If that's true, then I don't think this relationship is possible." He stated looking directly at her.
The words didn't register in her head quick enough, and once again he turned his back on her and resumed his training. Sakura was deathly still as she watching from behind him as he beat the wooden post with his bare fists. A single tear made it's way down her cheek.
"How could you…," it came out as whispered at first, but then it turned into rage filling her voice. "How could you say something like that! After everything we've been through."
He paid no heed to her, only focusing on how his fists pounded on the old wood.
"Sasuke look at me!", she commanded. When he didn't turn around she roughly grabbed his shoulder to turn him around.
"Look at me and tell me that you didn't mean what you said. Just take it back." Emerald eyes watering.
He looked at her coldly before stating, "You knew from the beginning that this relationship was based on the fact that I need a heir and that I entrusted you with that. So don't expect anything more from this arrangement."
Fury and hurt filled Sakura's words, "So it was just sex for you? Nothing else mattered in the least bit? Tell me, tell me in my face, to my eyes that this year meant nothing, that the love I felt for you didn't mean anything at all."
His calculation gaze didn't wavier and his words blatantly showed his feelings on the subject, "Just because you showed me your love and devotion, does not mean that I held the same feelings."
With more tears rolling down, Sakura felt the fire of hatred begin to kindle at the bottom of her heart. "You lie. You lie, Sasuke," she stated.
"Every time you held me, all those times where you sought my love, I felt it! I felt how you felt my love and compassion and how you returned it with equal endeavor! So don't lie to me!"
He looked at her so indifferently, with no emotion visible on his features. "If you want me to admit it then fine. The emotion you felt Sakura, the love you felt, was a lie. Does that make you feel better, to know I lied you? That I don't want you."
His words burned with each syllable that he pronounced.
"No it can't be true…" she whispered.
"It's the truth, and we could never work. You know how much a heir matters to me and the fact that your willing to give me what I need now means your not what I need."
Something broke inside Sakura, and the feeling of helplessness creped out on her like a virus. His words left cuts on her heart that were sure to scar and never fully heal.
She looked up at him longingly, before saying, "Uchiha Sasuke, I hate you." Her eyes blazed with anger as she turned her back and left the training grounds hoping to keep her composure before she broke down.
What she failed to notice as she left was how Sasuke's eyes bleed red and his fist clenched so tightly he drew blood. And how with one punch he removed the wooden post, that served the training grounds for many years, and turned it into rubble. Most of all, she didn't realize Sasuke knew she lied.
In the confines of her apartment bedroom, Sakura finely let the tears flow freely and the whimpers to be released into the safety of her pillow. She could feel the dampness gather at the corners of her eyes and how they flowed until they created a dampness on her pillow.
How could he tell her all those things? Did he want to hurt her is such a way? Her heart felt torn and longed for his arms to come wrap around her and make her feel safe once again. Her mind on the other hand, was a pit of fury that reminded her of the hurtful things he said and reminded her that true love got past anything. And the fact that Sasuke would let conception interfere with the love between them, then, Sakura thought maybe he really didn't love her to begin with.
Just the thought of Sasuke made her entire body ache, and knowing the fact that nothing she could say or tell him would fix any of this made her ache more. She couldn't give him the heir he needed, but she could give him the love that he was denied, however in the end she found that this was not enough for him.
Love was not enough.
He needed more than words he needed proof. He needed a child. The child that she could not conceive. Burying her face deeper into her pillow she inhaled the faint scent of Sasuke that still lingered and invaded her senses. That night she dreamt of a child with stark midnight hair with the eyes of deep emerald. Her child. Her baby. The baby that would never exist. And in a split second the pleasant dream turned into the harsh reminder of what she could not have and Sakura hoped that this was one nightmare she would never revisit.
Almost a year had passed between them and not once did they talk. Team 7 was held by a string, and was dangling, so close to breaking. Naruto put his best effort to help his two best friends get pass the differences that lurk between them, but some things just can't be repaired with a few simple words or actions, an idea that Naruto knew all too well. It didn't help that Sasuke was to be married in a few weeks, and Sakura was out on solo missions so frequently not even her mentor, the Hokage, remembered the last time she talked to Sakura.
How long has it been since she last seen Sasuke? Days, weeks, months even? Sakura had nearly forgotten how it was to be within a vicinity of him. But Sakura would never forget the feelings he evoked…the good and the bad.
In her time away from Konoha, Sakura learned that maybe Sasuke wasn't the one for her, and out there somewhere there was a man waiting for her. Holding on to that thought Sakura strived to find the person who would accept her for her, flaws in all.
When she passed thorough Konoha gates for the first time in months, she felt like a stranger. A stranger to a place she called home for the last twenty years for her life. Nothing to her was familiar, and she came to the conclusion that she didn't have a place here, a home. Being out in the forests and wilderness made civilization seem so unnatural and forced. Nothing in this village flowed freely with life and nature, everything had a ragged aura to it.
She had long sold the apartment she called home once she began taking solo missions, her stuff safety packed away in her parent's home. Sakura didn't want to go there just yet, so she wandered the streets of Konoha in the twilight hours of the day just thinking how different life would have been if she had Sasuke.
Passing by the Uchiha district sent tremors down her body, and evoked emotions that she had long since flushed through her systems in the wilderness. She was ready though, at least she thought she was. When she caught sight of that familiar raven-haired shinobi, she stopped dead in her tracks. He was heading home, from a date it seemed. Attached to his arm was a woman, a woman who Sakura knew all to well.
Karin. Her name was like acid on Sakura's tongue. Karin, that was it. No last name. She was brought in after Sasuke had tried to kill both of them. From what Sakura remembered, Karin was a test subject of sorts, with multiple bite wounds on her arms. Karin had the uncanny ability to provide strength and "heal" when others bit her. If you looked closely enough it seemed like Sakura and Karin were alike in ways, both being healers and in love with Sasuke, but yet they were complete opposites at the same time.
Looking over Karin, Sakura felt her heart drop at the realization that something was different with Karin. She belly was swollen with new life.
Impossible. Impossible, Sakura thought. Karin had to be at least six months to be showing that much. Six months meant one thing, and Sakura felt the quick onset of pain and hurt fill her. Her mind knew what was going on, yet her heart refused to believe the facts.
Sasuke had cheated on her.
With jumbled emotions, Sakura felt herself gravitating towards the couple. Soon enough she stood directly behind them, with there backs towards her. Looking closing it seemed like they were meant to be. Sasuke hand his arm around her waist with her arm returning the gesture, as she leaned into his side other arm around her rounded belly. It made Sakura feel something that she wasn't familiar with: hate.
Just because they weren't together anymore, or even taking, didn't mean Sakura was going to let Sasuke get away with what he has done when she thought he was the one she loved. He betrayed her trust in their relationship and he would pay for it.
She would get to the bottom of this jumbled mess, even if it costs her heart.
"Sasuke. How long?"
She was so hurt and angered at the moment, that she didn't care if Karin heard this or not.
And when he didn't respond to her, or look at her for the most part, flashes of red filled Sakura's vision.
"I said, how long?"
When he finally did look at her, his eyes completely void, he glared. "Sakura, leave." And he turned away once more.
"Leave? Really Sasuke? I thought you would know me better than this?" She voice mocking ever so slightly. "You know, I pester until heard."
He didn't want to hear her or answer her, so she grabbed him by the arm and swung him to face her directly. Karin standing idly by his side, with pride engrossing her features.
"You bastard! How could you do this to me with her? Was it that easy to just push me aside and forget me?" Her voice thundering thorough the empty lot. "Forget, how much you meant to me? How many times did you go to her when we were together one, twice, a few times? Was it that easy to leave me to suffer?"
"This doesn't involve-"
"The hell it doesn't! This involves me and you know it." She screamed. "What were you thinking?"
With a glance he looked her dead in the eyes. "I was thinking that you couldn't give me what I needed."
Slap!
Sakura stared at her quivering hand, then looked to the redness forming on the side of Sasuke's face.
"So that's all the mattered to you? Your entire freaking life was spent chasing revenge, and all you ever cared about was your clan and your life. Your so fucking selfish Sasuke."
Anger glistened inside of Sasuke. "I'm selfish Sakura? You're the fucking hypocrite."
"When were you ever going to tell me that you couldn't have children? That numerous results told you were infertile?" He accused.
Shock filled Sakura. "How did you-"
"How did I find out? I found out from the least likely of people, Sakura." Fury fuming inside him he continued. "You really want to know? Karin told me, showed me your tests even."
"Those tests, they aren't always accurate. I thought-" She whispered.
"Thought what? That those three tests were void and null? Just look at the facts Sakura, they're staring straight at you." His eyes still cold towards her.
He grabbed Karin's hand, and walked away. Leaving her standing in the dark.
All alone.
When Sakura woke up to the warm sunlight licking at the features, she knew she had to get up and face her demons. She had lied to Sasuke, and he had every right to betray her. It just hurt to know that nothing could be done to fix what mess she had created. She wanted to talk to him, to explain to him, but she feared that he would be unwilling to listen.
She walked the narrow streets of the marketplace, and found her self sitting on the all to familiar ramen stand stools. From down the street she could already hear, the obnoxious voice of her ever so loud teammate.
"Sakura-chan! When did you get back? How come you haven't come to see me?"
"Life got in the way Naruto." She stirred her ramen as she looked up to catch sight of the blue pools of her best friend's eyes.
"Things keep happening to me, Naruto. And I can't control them. They're tearing me apart and I don't know how long I can take it anymore?"
Sadness filled Naruto, it was that damn Bastard's fault.
"Don't give up. You can't yet. Life too short for you to give up now, Sakura-chan."
She wished that she could accept his words believe them even. "I don't have anything worth fighting for anymore. Nothing is left for me here, I can't even call this place home anymore."
"You'll always have a home here, Sakura-chan, whether you believe me or not. Konoha will always be the place where you belong, there are too many memories here for you to just pick up and leave."
She shook her head. "That's exactly what I want though, can't you see? It's the memories that are killing me, they burn my soul, and burn until even the ash has no place inside me."
He tugged her into a tight hug. 'I need you, Konoha needs you, and even if he won't admit it the Bastard needs you too."
"He has Karin now, Naruto, or did you forget?" Her eyes shut tightly, at the thought of the happy couple.
He gripped her tighter. "Karin may be able to give him a child, but it's you who can provide him love. I've never seen him show any emotion unless he's with you, that's how I knew he loved you."
She untangled herself from their embrace, and looked up at Naruto. "Can he really forgive me for this? For this mess I solely created? For the pain I must have cause him?"
He looked at her solemnly. "That, I don't know. If he does love you, then I'm sure he can forgive you for this, as you forgave him for leaving all those years back and all the hell he put us through. If there is one thing I do know, it's that he loves you, and better Believe It!"
She smiled and reached to hug him again. Now knowing what to do.
She had found him in the training grounds, the same exact place where those many months ago they had ended. Sakura needed this, she needed closure. She needed forgiveness, and she was hoping that he would be willing to give it to her. For all the pain she caused, she desperately wanted it.
"We need to talk," she started. "We need to fix this thing between us, this mess we've created."
He didn't move, and she was met with silence.
"There is nothing to discuss, Sakura." He responded, as he continued to beat at the new wood anchored to the ground.
"That's where you wrong, there is so much, so much that you don't know, that we need to fix.", she pleaded, "Please, Sasuke."
"Hn."
"Please, I need this." She came to be in front of him, "We need this."
"There is no we."
Hurt, Sakura said, "There will always be a 'we', so long as Team 7 exists."
His fists pounded hard, so similar to their previous conversation in this place. Sakura knew this time around, she wouldn't let fear override her this time and she would ensure that Sasuke heard the truth, no matter the cost. She wouldn't let this mess conflict with her any longer.
"There is more to this then one lie, Sasuke. Don't you want to know why? Then maybe we could fix this," she motioned to the space between her and Sasuke, "fix us."
He stopped his movements, "There can never be an 'us', Sakura. We can't fix past, no matter how hard you try."
He started walking away, and she reached out and took him by the hand swinging him to her front. "You can always heal something, it's not impossible."
He removed his hand from hers roughly. "Either you don't understand, or don't know. We don't have a future."
Sakura stared at him confused, she saw as he noted her expression, and thought for the briefest moment she saw emotion flickering behind his eyes, before it diminished as fast as it came.
"I'm marrying her, Sakura." And with that he left to her wake.
She stood there for a while watching him walk out of her life once more, and thought that was something Naruto definitely didn't bother to mention.
Lest to say, her heart had a few more wounds added to it. She just didn't know how long until it finally shattered…
Authors note: Review if you want me to continue. Thank-you.