.:I Will Follow You Into The Dark:.
by
Roxyfoxy
'Not every story is idealistic.
Not every story has a happy ending.
Sometimes we have to be real
to speak the truth...'
" Inuyasha you can't be dead. I know in my heart you aren't. If you were I'd be sure of it. There is no way your gone. I can feel you, and see you. I can't deny that you aren't here, and I know I'm not crazy either."
Kagome continued sitting against the cold damp ledge surrounding the tree of ages, where he had been pinned to for years.
" Kagome, can you hear me?"
Kagome found herself standing in the rain feeling the raindrops pounding even harder against her skin and body. She could feel herself shiver, but it didn't even phase her that she was wet or cold. Her head just raised from her lap knowing the voice had brought her back to life.
Kagome twirled her head in every direction where she heard the voice come from. She could feel her heart beating louder than ever before. All this time everyone was telling her he was deceased, that he didn't cease to exist anymore. The minute his voice came to her, she was sure he was alive.
" Over here, you idiot."
If it was any other time Kagome would of sat him an instant, or at least bitched him out for his sharp jerky mocks. Kagome carefully rose from her feet like an automatic, seeing Inuyasha standing with his red hakori flapping in the gentle breeze, and his hair held heavy against his shoulders from the weight of the rain.
Inuyasha's eyes lit up the instant he looked at her, and a smile something she never thought you could possess. The only time Inuyasha had those looks when Kikyo came into his presence or a sign of her was near by. In amazement Kagome stood only with her mouth and eyes wide open.
" Did you really think I'd leave you like this?"
Inuyasha gently placed his hands firmly on her shoulders, lifting her head from the ground.
" I never realized how worried you could be about me. I could never leave you, Kagome. Whether you realize or not you give me strength and help me carry on, and even fight against Naraku. Without you, I'd be nothing."
Kagome carefully brought herself back down towards the ledge, holding Inuyasha's firmly bringing him down to the same level.
" Inuyasha what about Kikyo? How can you say this to me, when Kikyo will always be with you?"
Inuyasha carefully signed, knowing this was a grim topic to discuss at any given point. He bit his lip when he thought of the moments he had accidentally called her Kikyo, and purposely did it in heated arguments. He cupped her hand, and gently reached into his sleeve.
He gently handed her a small delicate orchid, with a plain smile on his face.
" Look Kagome, let me explain something. It's hard enough to explain where you and Kikyo stand. Kikyo will always be on my mind, and I won't lie. Even in death I know you believe Kikyo and I will be reunited again. It's an opportunity, for her and I to relive our lives that were pretty much stolen away from us. But Kagome, even if I was dead I'd stay here… because of you.
Kagome couldn't find herself believing his words. She felt maybe as though Sango and Miroku were right, it was all in her head. That maybe her mind was projected what she wanted to see and hear.
" Kagome everything can be revived. That orchid looks dead but with a little care it can live again. Just like you've done to me. You understand what I'm trying to say?"
Kagome couldn't believe this was Inuyasha. She felt herself blink a couple times to reassure it wasn't just her being delusional. She could see it was Inuyasha but hard to believe those were his words.
Kagome rolled the orchid back and forth between her hands.
" Inuyasha just I don't understand. Everyone believes your dead. But I can see you, and touch you. Am I the one who has lost it?"
Inuyasha carefully placed his one arm against her back letting her body lean into him comfortably. He softly kissed her on the forehead placing his Kimono over her soaked body.
" Your fine Kagome, believe your fine. You have all the proof you need. It doesn't matter what others think or feel it's what you feel. I learned that along time ago, I guess being a half demon has its perks."
Kagome just nuzzled herself closer, seeing his one arm raised trying to protect them both from the pouring rain.
" Inuyasha where did you get such a beautiful flower like this? I thought these flowers were scarce in your era?"
Inuyasha cupped his hands over hers staring at the orchid that looked like it was slowly on the brink of death. He placed his head up to the air, and breathed in trying to surpass the pain.
" They are. I visited my mother's gravesite and those flowers were the only ones of its kind growing there. I took one and decided to plant them right in front of the God Tree. The exact same day you arrived, a year later I planted them to show that spot meant something to me."
Kagome squeezed his hand leaving her to find herself feeling like she was floating on air. She laughed, while Inuyasha raised his infamous eyebrow.
" Where the hell do you find the humor in this! I try to be nice and this is-"
" Inuyasha I'm not laughing at you. I mean I sometimes feel like this isn't you. It almost seems like they others are right, that you don't exist. I mean I've never heard you say these words. Your always snapping at me, and never having time for anyone. Then again it has to be you."
Inuyasha was ready to make another rude comment, but stopped it. He shook his head and let her stupid comments and ideas slip past him.
" Kagome, believe what you believe. Don't let any others do that to you. Tomorrow, check by the God Tree. I will be there waiting for a nice afternoon of just you and I. In the meantime, I'll let you have time to being at home. And Kagome…
Kagome twirled around with a smile on her face seeing Inuyasha was ready to attend to something else.
" Don't leave me…"
Kagome found herself awakening to the greeting of the sun, still in the same position where Inuyasha had left her in front of the tree. Kagome could hear sounds of her brother causing a ruckus through her bedroom window, knowing it was school time again. She yawned stretching herself out, slowly finding herself near the well holding the orchid and the Kimono still draped over her.
" You were here Inuyasha. There is no doubt in my mind. If anything I'll prove them wrong about your death. That night was real, and I know it."
Kagome found herself in a warm climate of the feudal era seeing spring had arrived earlier than expected. Butterflies and flowers were in bloom, and Kagome couldn't keep her excitement at bay when she saw the others sprawled outside the Kaede's hut.
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" Kagome, your back so soon. I thought you would of stayed to mourn over Inuyasha's…death…
Sango thought snacking on a slim piece of watermelon, letting Kirara take the rest with pride. Miroku rose from his spring slumber against the tree awakening to what appeared to be a glowing happy go lucky Kagome, but not fitting the whole pieces together as to why she was extremely happy when a tragedy occurred.
" Look Sango, Miroku, Inuyasha is not dead! I can prove it!"
Miroku carefully placed his hand across her forehead making sure her she wasn't suffering any illnesses or anything.
" Sango, she appears to be fine. But Kagome I hate to say this but this happens to everyone who passes away. You're still not excepting his departure. Your were there when he closed his eyes, and frankly he was the last thing you saw. When you do these illusions of him being there will disappear."
Kagome threw herself on the ground in excitement kicking in a fit a laugher of joy. Kagome carefully pulled his Kimono in front of their eyes, holding an eager smile on her face.
" Look see! I have Inuyasha's Kimono. He came last night, I'm sure of it. The Kimono is proof he still exists.
Sango bowed her head down holding the fabric between her finger and fore thumbs both examining the texture and feeling of his Kimono. They calmly gave it back, ready to break her smile.
" Kagome this is nothing more but a single sweater that seems to be yours. Look, we wouldn't lie to you. Kagome personally, I understand how much Inuyasha meant to you, and all of us. Death we have to accept it's apart of life, I can't see you go on like this. You believe you see him all the time Kagome, I believe your seeing things you want to see."
Sango softly rubbed her back in comfort, seeing Kagome stumped and in awe when she saw the sweater was hers that was nothing of the colour or feeling of his Kimono.
" I swear this was Kimono- I'm sure of it! I mean I felt Inuyasha in there. I felt him kiss me on the forehead, and hold my hand. You can't say I'm crazy! I mean he even gave me this orchid, saying he plant many like these near the God Tree as a tribute of meeting each other for the first time."
Sango and Miroku signed. Neither said any other word. They looked at each other nodding almost like they could read each other's minds. Sango gently grabbed Kagome's hand, strolling towards the tree.
" Where are we going?"
Sango looked up into the sky seeing the sunlight peaking through the leaves of the Inuyasha forest. She calmly swallowed knowing things were only getting worse.
" To see Inuyasha."
Kagome ran towards the tree without question the moment she saw it. The sun's light shone directly on the tree as though it was showing its importance. The minute she saw the bundles of orchids growing at the base of the tree like Inuyasha promised, she knew he was alive. He had to be.
" Sango! Miroku! See the flowers are right here like he prom…ised…"
Kagome's voice drifted and found herself on her knees with despair. The flowers were there, every single one beautiful until she saw dirt that looked like it had just been shoveled and unearthed. Kagome saw the small cross and the orchids and it all made sense, knowing Sango and Miroku were right all along.
Sango bent down supporting her, seeing she was already in a fit in disappoint and tears feeling so stupid for not coming to believe them.
" I…I.. Don't understand! The flowers, him being with me, him promising to meet him here.."
" Kagome, we tried to tell you. You made every excuse to believe he was alive. He was real because you made him real. You wanted to see him, and completely blocked out his death. The flowers we all gathered together for his gravesite. Also meeting him here. Do you understand Kagome? Were so sorry…."
" I can't believe I was a fool to believe after weeks of him gone, I thought he was alive!"
Miroku stamped his staff down placing a common Buddhist prayer whenever they passed gravesites or anywhere people had been buried.
" Lady Kagome… You wanted him there with you always, and weren't ready to accept him gone. So everything you saw was an image that you, yourself wanted to see. The clothing, and the flowers were sure signs of that. You made things into something it wasn't."
Kagome gently touched the bark once more where he laid when they first met, and crawled down to her knees seeing this is where they buried him.
" Kagome its hard to accept. We buried him here because he wanted this. He said his favorite spot in the world was at the God Tree. It's where his life stopped, and relived again. Where Kikyo and him departed, and where you and him began. We thought this was an appropriate place to bury him, you were the one who came with the idea…remember?"
Sango asked seeing if she had any memory of doing so. Kagome thought long and hard feeling the memories flash right through her.
" If anything Inuyasha wanted was to be happy. He can be in peace, and I think would be good to let him rest in peace near the tree. Kikyo and him departed from there, and where him and I met. I just thought it would symbolize something of importance. Its what he would of wanted anyways….
" If you guys wouldn't mind, I'd like peace to myself with Inuyasha."
They agreed seeing Kagome was ready and able to pay her respects to Inuyasha's sudden death. They slowly stepped out of the area, until she felt like she was the only one living in the world. She carefully pulled the dead orchid from her palm and placed it with all the others around his grave. She tightened her eyes; feeling tears run down her face.
" Inuyasha I know, where you, your safe. I have no doubt in my mind your happy. Where you can be yourself, forever and for always. You can be reunited with Kikyo, seeing both of you are at peace. I know you've waited for this way before I entered the picture. I'll miss you dearly Inuyasha, and I love you always. I know your not gone, because I can your heart beating within mine. As long as I'm alive, you are too…