Author's Note: Another crack thought written at 1:30 am to avoid studying stress.
Disclaimer: I don't own Eyeshield 21.
An Innocent Conversation
By: Bar-Ohki
This was one of those occasions where you walk in on a conversation and you don't know what they are talking about and you find yourself playing along and hoping you are right. The people already talking: Kongo Unsui and Kurita Ryokan. The person walking into the conversation: Kobayakawa Sena.
"-the greatest feel in your hand." Unsui was explaining "It was like it had been made to fit in my hand."
"That must have been heavenly!" Kurita chipped happily.
Sena stood there, trying to make himself small and invisible until he figured out what exactly the two were talking about.
"I can hold them all damn day," Unsui was smiling a little, "with no complaints. So much better than that shit Agon keeps, I don't know why he doesn't try to get anything better."
"I think that's because Agon-kun has a poor eye for that kind of thing. I mean he's so talented and all…." Kurita supplied his opinion. At the end he faded off to avoid the awkward subject that was Unsui's twin brother.
"You know, you're probably right." Unsui nodded. "He just gets them nice, flashy, and cheep. I mean, hell, I don't know how Hiruma puts up with it."
"Hiruma doesn't." Kurita explained quickly. "He's just found ways to go around Agon's habits because it was 'not worth the fucking trouble' to try and change Agon's mind."
"Sensible of him." Unsui nodded sagely.
Sena was starting to wonder if they were talking about breasts.
"So what did Karin-chan think?" Kurita asked.
Oh they must have been talking about breasts! Cue embarrassed blush. Couldn't they be a little more discrete? Karin probably didn't appreciate this conversation if she ever heard of it-!
"She was downright excited." Unsui explained. "And she had to show me all of her favorite poses and positions, the made me do them…. You know how she can get."
Kurita only nodded. Sena wanted to go crawl into a cave of mortification and stay there.
"Was there anything else?" Kurita asked after a bit of silence.
"We both came-" Unsui was cut off by Sena's funny squeaking noise. The conversation had been too much for him. His face was beat red.
"Ah, Sena?" Kurita asked, concerned with the runningback's welfare.
"How!?" Sena protested. "How can you two just talk about sex like that!?"
Unsui and Kurita shared a startled look.
"No no-!" Unsui protested waving his hands in a fluster.
"W-We were talking about balls!" Kurita answered only to watch Sena start to turn green.
"-Footballs! We were talking about the new stock of game balls we just got!" Unsui explained. "Karin helped me pick them up and she had me do impromptu modeling for her manga!"
"R-really?" Sena asked.
"Really." Unsui assured him.
Karin and Suzuna chose at this moment to reveal themselves. They'd been hiding behind a locker.
"You boys are absolutely no fun!" Suzuna announced and stalked out of the room, grabbing Sena's hand as she went and inadvertently dragging him out with her.
"Ka-karin!?" Unsui gasped.
"I-I am I not good enough for you to brag about?" Karin asked quietly.
"I don't talk about that because I don't want anyone to try and steal you from me!" Unsui corrected her and Kurita turned red and made a quick retreat.
"But can't you protect us?" Karin asked.
"Well of course I can but-" Unsui was cut off by a wide-eyed Agon and Hiruma walking into the room.
"Please, please tell me that fucking dreads here is not about to be an Uncle." Hiruma was praying. Because he did not want to be dealing with Agon if that was the case. Fucking dreads had enough issues with the concept of Unsui dating.
Karin and Unsui shared a look.
"Maybe~"
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Studying stress crack! Yay!