Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. I know you all thought I did (totally, right?), but unfortunately I don't. This is just me and my unicorn sitting behind a laptop, wasting my life on here.

Unavoidable

Dear James,

I don't know why I'm writing this. I know I won't ever send this.

I don't know why I even picked up my quill. But I'm just so confused.

I had a feeling. No, not a feeling. Just a… subconscious awareness, if you will.

Okay, I had a subconscious awareness that you liked me. In a more-than-just-friends way. Or, in our case, in a more-than-just-enemies way.

But that didn't keep me from being shocked. Astounded. Appalled.

Sev told me. He told me, directly to my face, that you... "fancied" me.

So explicit, yet so incomprehensible.

And then I called you something horrid, as expected.

At least Sev got what he wanted, I guess.

But it's you who we're discussing.

You are a pompous prat. Who's annoying and disrespectful. And I hate you because of that.

But, somehow, sometimes, I find that a bit… admirable.

You've constantly managed to squirm your way into my brain.

Like right now.

But that's because you've done something so audacious, so irreversible.

Yet I did something even more so. And I am overwhelmingly irate with myself for doing it.

Why did I have to utter that tiny yet destructive word?

Even now, after five hours, my brain is clouded by dense anger.

I can't exactly think any thought except: I am so stupid. I am such an idiot.

What kind of moronic, reckless instinct forced me to say yes?

Why am I usually so clever with retorts, yet when I actually need one, it doesn't come?

Why have I completely changed the course of my life by agreeing to your foolish, daring question?

What have I done?

Nothing good, obviously.

But hold on a second.

Who knows what will happen when gossip about this spreads?

People might just accept it. Maybe they will have been expecting it.

Maybe they were much more intelligent than me, and saw that the question was inevitable.

Was this actually inevitable?

Would it have been possible for us to go through all seven years of Hogwarts, avoiding a situation like this?

My friends would think not. And yours would have the same belief.

So maybe I should stop being a coward.

Maybe I should just go and face the crowd, proudly announcing myself as your girlfriend.

Maybe I should flaunt our status to everyone I see, holding your hand tightly, eying you romantically.

Or, more realistically, maybe I should do something in the middle of that and my pouting right now.

That seems a better option than trying to forget. Trying to deny my previous words to you through an awkward situation. Trying to avoid what is destined to happen.

Maybe we are meant for each other.

Or not.

Well, I guess we'll find out within a few weeks, anyway.

If this doesn't work, we'll just go back to being the supposed enemies we were.

But, if this does works out, maybe we'll go farther than just casual dating.

Okay, that's thinking too far ahead.

I think I'll just leave the future to unravel itself.

It's much easier that way.

Meanwhile, I'll just go out to the common room to try to find you.

I'll show the world that my "yes" was not just a slip of tongue.

It was meant to happen.

It was my inescapable fate, whether I liked it or not.

It was completely and utterly unavoidable.

Love,

Lily

P.S. I'm going to burn this piece of parchment soon. It has served its purpose, and you will never need to read it.