One evening, Rorscach (who was really a red head called Walter Kovacs) was walking down a street in NEW YORK CITY with his hands in his pockets (werin his black and white inkp spot mask thingy). Rorschach normally walked the streets on his own- in fact, he lived most of his life alone. That was because he had an abusive mother who was a prostitute and an absent father and then he went into the care system, suffered there, gt a job as a tailor and further isolated himself from the world when he found a dress that used to belong to a woman that was murdered and he didnot like the fact that she died so he went onto joing da WACHTMEN 9BUT THEN HE FOUND AN BAD MAN WHO HAD KILLED A GURL SO HE KILLED HIM BACK(Authors' Note: just letting everyone know that I really was paying attention to the storyline of Watchmen and the audience far too stupid tounderstand the complexity of this character without my skiulfull writing!!11!!!11I don't need a beta, suckers!).

He had finished another internal monologue discussing how evil liberals and women are while unintentionally revealing to his audience (DATS U!!!!) that he was secretly very insecure about himself sexually and politically...................................then he realised he was heading towards his friend Dan's house (who is Nite Owl 2, who is one of THE WATCHMEN).

"Hurm- I am uncharacteristically aroused and wanting TEH HOT OWL SECKZ!"

{o,o} O RLY?!

-"-"-

Rorschach grunted, " I mean- I love him and want him.....to love.......forever....and ever....".

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Dan (Nite Owl 2) was in his house reading a very boring book to do with his proffession or whatevrr (it's a boring book with NO PICTURS!!!11 THAT'S ALL YOU NEED TO KNOWW!!!) when and he suddenky thought to himself "I would really like me some dick because I am already sick of Laurie's vagina women and am strangely wantin some freaky HOBO SECKS!!!11!!1" said Dan in a tacky sexy voice like in those porno films I sooo don't watchg because I'm soooonut a slut, "I mean- I-have-alw-ways-loved=him-and-want-to-marry-him-and-raise-children-with-him" (AN: Rprschach is sucjh and grate father figur!).

Dan decided to rummage through his porno collection to see if he had hobo pron at his disposal, but soon realised that he already knew a hawt, GINGER READ HGEAD CARROT TOP HOmBo (AN: just making sure that I've established my prejudice against redheads by constantly reminding you of his RED HAIR!!!!)

THEN suddenmly rorschak wuz dere and they wemt 2 bed while nyt owlwl was masagig wallie (dat's his nickname to nyt owl). Rorshak said "Hurm, I luv you" and then Nit Oul said "OMG I lov u too!!""

WARNIN: MASSIV SECKS SEEN FOLOW, VIOWER EXECUTION ADVISEDED

They were going to monologue a bit more, bu they were too hawt for an ORANGEGASM (an: get it? RED HAIR!) by having GEY SECKZZ (IN THE BUTTWHOLE).

Rorchach put his penus into Dan and he got all gooey and sticky (boys get moist, right?).

"OHOHOHOH! Damnial!" SAID RORLOLOLSHOCK "That feels really good and I'm really GAY! I'm so gay and this acftuallyt happened in the comic behnd da scenes but it was CUT FOR AD SPACE!).

They movd lyk bunnehs on drugs amd then NytOwel got his boy parts and putted them in Rawrshacks mouth. Rorschak managed to answer the phone when it rang and it wuz LAUWRIE, so he told her he wuz fuckin her hawt boyfriend and she sed "Ok" and hung up. Then the frij opened. Rorshac jumped into the fridge. Dan new he wuz goin in fur beanz for use for lube. Then they wer al cpoverdd in beannz and the fone nring ed again and it was SILK SPECTRE, but NOT TEH YUNG ONE, TEH OLD GRAMA one. She was all like "WOW HOT" and they were all like "HELLZ YEAH!"

Then Mr Manhaton got involwed because he sensed irt with his magical psydkid prowars (bcus he's a big blue penis slut LAWL) and he sed that :Lolrie wuz a bich (LOL) and he used his masiv blue boys thiongie on them when he split himself in a million and it wuz like a freaky blue orgie.

Then they all had a piece of his BLUE PENIS thatroarshawk had his GUINGER PUBES ON. He was eating some sugar cubes while he was spiralling on the penus (like it was a buffalo in a rodeo). Then Dan, grama, blue penus man ans superman got their penuses inside Rorlshaw's VAGIMAwhich got all wet and he started to cry tears of tea, so eberyon got suger cubes to go with the tea, then the MAD Hater (JOHNY DEPPPPP HELL YAH!!" appeared and sed "LET the GAY SEX TEA ORGY BEGIN!" and everyon changed places bcus like in ALKice in Wunderland e and the Cheshire cat wuz a perBERT and he wached (STEBPEH FRY IZ A HOMO GAY PERV ifr you don't no hoo that iz then you are CLASSLESS and TALENTLESS and NOT VERY CELVEVR and a PREP).

Grama was rubbin her cblit and wuz aroused by Damniel, but worlshak got all protective and fuced her IN THE NOSETRIL!!!

Then everybody hated Rorshawk for ruining the love and being really territorial and a red head and a sociopath......

So the moral of the story is, you can turn anything into a masturbatory aid (even if it's a well respected piece of literature like Watchmen). DA ENGD!