December 12, X793
In some weird, cryptic, obsessive way, I still hold on to the belief that I will get a response somehow, someday. But it has been months and… nothing. Well, I guess writing to a ghost is like wasting ink on air. Just writing to to you, even if it is a you that can not respond, gives my life some purpose, some hope. Levy, Cana, and Erza are all coming to visit in a short time.. There is to be a ball. My fondest memories have been at balls with you, Mother. Now that I think about it, this is to be my first without you, let us hope I do not trip, cross your fingers? I'll write soon.
With the most love,
Lucy
I stand from my desk and look down at the letter, how I miss her so.
My thoughts are interrupt by a slight shuffle coming from behind my door. I hear whispers then a knock, "Yes? Who is it?" The door opens with a faint squeak and a petite, white-haired young lady stands in the doorway and bows her head to me. Her short locks fall out of place with the bow.
"Miss, you have been called down to dinner, may I help you get changed into the appropriate clothing for this evening?" She says timidly. Afraid of making eye contact.
I smile at her, "Yes, Lisanna, that would be ever so helpful." She looks up at me, a small smile across her lips. I smile back warmly.
I walk towards a beam of my canopy bed and hold on to it. My least favorite part of the day. Lisanna disappears, only to reappear with clothes in her arms. She lays down my evening clothes and starts to undo my corset bindings. I look at the dress she has chosen, "how did you know?" I whisper with delight.
She is taken aback by my words, "know what, miss?"
I look back at her and then the dress laying on my bed, "that that one is my absolute favorite." It was made up of a beautiful red silk adorned with rare Fiore jewels. It was the softest silk I had ever touched and moved so fluidly when I walked. It was sent in from Cana as a gift a few months ago.
"I didn't know. It was the first dress to catch my eye." She mumbles softly as she finishes undoing my corset bindings.
"You are going to be an amazing lady-in-waiting, I suppose." I say almost inaudibly. You would not have been able to hear it if you were as close as she was. She blushes and starts to bind my new corset. Then, with a quick hand, she slips my dress on. I smile at her kindly and she bows, exiting the room.
I grab my black gloves and slip them on, securing them around my elbow so they don't droop. I head downstairs, the smell of fresh chicken and newly cooked mash potatoes fill my nostrils with delight. When I make it to the bottom of the stairs I am announced and led to the dining room. Almost everyone is here and when I arrive we all sit. The first course is brought out almost immediately. A boy leans over me and sets down my plate, I smile at him and he bows slightly.
I've never seen him before, of course I do not know everyone who works in the palace, but I know most, but not him. He has crow black hair and smells like peppermint. He is rather pale and has a handsome, lean yet musculine body. I can't help but smile, it fades as quickly as it comes. He is the lowest class of society, but me? I am about as high as it gets. Royalty. I could never marry a commoner, a nobody. I could never disgrace my family that way, my mother's name.
I turn away from the raven-haired boy and back to my food. I stare at it, suddenly not hungry. I push it away slightly and sit up straighter. This corset was suffocating, tighter than it felt a few moments ago. My breathing becomes unsteady and unfocused. My world fades to black for a moment then back to normal. The room becomes blurry and my breathing comes at uneven pace. I close my eyes. A strong voice calls out to me and my eyes shoot open, "Your Highness, are you alright?" The voice is coming to from the left of me. I blink rapidly and turn that way, it takes me a minute to focus and find the right words, "yes. Quite. Thank you." I take a few more breaths, calmingly listening to my father as he speaks politics with his ambassadors, when they finally take a break to sip their brandy, I ask if I may be excused, my wish is granted and I escape quickly and quietly.
I turn out of the corridor and fling myself to the wall, clenching on to the tapestry so tightly that my knuckles turn white. I move towards a nearby bench, feeling the velvet cushion underneath me. I lean my head back, letting out a short, trembling breath and close my eyes. The days have not gotten easier. Of course, there are days when I am happy and full of laughter, but those days are so rare now. My days are typically full of sadness and hopelessness.
A single tear rolls down my cheek, "oh mom…" my voices echos very quietly throughout the corridor. I am all alone in such a big palace. No guards or servants are present in this hallway, not surprising since its dinner.
I take a few moments to regain my composure and stand up, using the bench to steady myself. I walk down the corridor until I reach a corner. I stand up straighter and turn the corner. I am met with the face of a boy. He seems surprised to see me, I look past him and see a sign that says Lower Classman Rooms and let out a deep sigh. I must have gotten lost, we are even suppose to come down this way.
"You lost?" I turn my focus back to the boy. He is much taller than me, with strong arms. His eye are a deep, onyx color and his hair a strange salmon. I must have been staring, because he chuckles dryly, catching my attention again, "I guess you are." He moves past me and leads me down a hall.
I follow him, making sure to keep my distance.
"So what are you doing down here? You seem… like you are a little… upset, if I may say." He keeps his head straight, not making eye contact.
How blunt. "I suppose." I respond without thinking, wishing I could take it back.
He finally turns towards me and gives me a sad smile, "wanna talk about it?"
"I don't talk to someone if I don't even know their name and title. It is improper." I may have stretched that a little but I was so curious of who he was.
He stops and turns to me, "Natsu. Natsu Dragneel, servant to the Royal Family of Heartfilia." He bows a little, "You are Princess Lucy, I presume?"
"You presume right. If you know who I am, why do you speak to me so familiar?" I inquire.
"I don't think you title makes you who you are, besides don't you get a little… I don't know, tired? Of all the formalities?"
Yes. "Perhaps sometimes, but that is how things are done."
He smiles at me and continues to walk, we stay silent until we have reached the stairs leading to my room, "only if you allow it, Your Highness…" He smiles with another bow and turns away to leave.
I almost call out to him, but that would be improper. And a Future Queen or any royal at all is never improper to those lower. So I turn and enter my room, ringing for Lisanna.