Disclaimer: I do not own Kim Possible, any of the other characters from that show, or those from any other media I may reference in my stories.

0000000000

The first drawback to Drakken's mountain lair was, to put it bluntly, a lack of parking space. There was some space available within the lair, but no one was allowed to use it just yet. This included all of the prospective new renters of said lair.

For the lair in question was now back on the market, Drakken having had his lease terminated due to a lack of villainous activity over the past six months, since he became an accidental candidate, and then the actual Mayor of Middleton. His landlord, Jack Hench, expressed deep regret, but that was just the way it was, business was business.

So today, a Tuesday for the record, an Open Lair was being held for the benefit of those interested in moving in. And to be honest, Hench had not anticipated any traffic problems, based on the difficulty he had had getting anyone to rent it in the first place. After all, who wanted a lair overlooking Kim Possible's hometown?

But Drakken had rented it, and now cars were lining up on the shoulder of the approach road, at least twenty so far, with more arriving. Practically every flat surface on the mountainside now had a helicopter or more exotic aircraft occupying it. In fact, a large craft vaguely resembling a glittering child's top had moored itself to a sheer cliff, directly above the entrance!

Viewing this from the comfort of his office by remote video, Hench was currently straightening his tie in front of a mirror. "Bellows!" He shouted, and his personal assistant popped through the doors so quickly he might as well have been leaning on them in anticipation of the summons. "Get the fast bird ready." Hench ordered the man, "We have an unexpectedly high turnout at Drakken's lair, can't miss this opportunity to network!"

000000000

"Do you want me to monitor your pulse and blood pressure in case you need a sedative?" Shego directed a dark glare at the speaker, before adjusting her clothes for the ninth time in the last three minutes. "I'm not sure why you're even here, rubbing elbows with all sorts of villains!" She muttered back, "I mean, what would your Daddy say?"

Bernadette Barr smirked. "Ana, do you know what kind of people my Dad has done business with in the past? I remember meeting a couple of people at a party when I was fifteen, who are now serving very long prison terms in a Federal Pen!"

"Minimum Security, I'll bet!" Was Shego's sarcastic reply as her eyes continued to sweep the main chamber of Drakken's lair. Or ex-lair, as of today. Only a few 'guests' had arrived as yet, but more were expected. Far more then Shego herself would have guessed. And there were some pretty heavy hitters already present. Of course, not all of them were here to look the place over to purchase, some were here to meet other 'like-minded' people, or just grab a free snack while rubbernecking. Shego sighed, even supervillains could be...childish? That thought made her snort in amusement.

"What?" Bernie asked curiously, but Shego only shook her head, eyes focused on the entrance where Hank Perkins was greeting the guests as they came in.

Currently a man dressed in pinstripes with an old style fedora on his head, A tall Asian in an old Manchu-style costume, and a short man in high-quality Arab dress were entering.

"A pleasure to have you here, Mister Socollatte!" Hank greeted the first cheerfully, then he bowed to the second, "And most welcome, Honorable Ding Bhat! Oh, and great disguise, Professor Dementor!" He added enthusiastically before turning to greet still more arrivals, ignoring the gnashing of teeth beneath the keffiyeh of the last named.

"You're probably right, I'm going to need to be tranquilized before the day is out!" Shego muttered to Bernie as the disguised German supervillain regained his composure and began to take a good look at his surroundings.

"Good, I got something from the Vets at the Zoo that should work!" Bernie's grin only widened as she received another dark look. "Shego, don't get all wound up now, you know something is going to happen sooner or later, you need to conserve your strength!"

That caused Shego to blink, then then nod thoughtfully. "You got a point there." She shook her head. "Why did I agree to do this again?"

Rhetorical the question may have been, but Bernie chose to answer it anyway. "So Drew Lipsky could have a nice honeymoon with his new bride, that's why! In other words, for a good reason, Anastasia Black!"

Shego sighed, her shoulders slumping slightly. "I know, but I'm not good at this, and I hold grudges like you wouldn't believe! And I know I'm going to blame Doctor D for getting me into this, you just watch!"

Bernie put an arm around her shoulders and gave them a squeeze. "Come on, it may not turn out that badly!" Then she caught sight of the latest arrivals, and her eyes widened. "I'll be damned, that does work!"

"Huh?" Shego followed her gaze and her own eyes narrowed. "You have got to be kidding me! And yeah, 'Don't tempt the Fates, they're always listening!'" Then she started across the floor towards Hank Perkins' station, Bernie trailing behind.

A group of three figures confronted Shego's co-host. They were all about four feet tall, clad in semi-rigid off-white suits with full helmets enclosing their heads. They might have been living beings, or robots, it was difficult to tell. Though they were now claiming the latter.

"We are artificial constructs operating under the remote control of several prospective buyers!" They were explaining to Hank, "Who for varying reasons are unable to take the time, or assume the risks involved in coming here in person!"

Shego and Bernie knew differently. These were three of the aliens who had given Team Go their powers, hoping to create a superhero group whose exploits would generate good will which they could then exploit for their own mercenary purposes. Though for the record, the five recipients of those powers had not been the intended targets.

The last thing the two women had heard, the aliens had made a few adjustments to Kim without her knowledge, then taken most of them back. And they were worried how their superiors were going to view their performance.

"And who might these buyers be?" Hank asked amiably, "So I can make you name tags?"

The lead alien twisted about as if to look at his comrades, fidgeting. "Err, I—oh, LOOK, guys, Shego's here!" He said this while trying to back away from the approaching woman and dodge behind the other two. Which failed, since they in turn were trying to make sure they were last in line when Shego got to them.

"What! Where!" The heads on two nearby visitors swiveled about frantically as one called out enthusiastically. They both looked to be college age, and one seemed to be wearing a notebook computer mounted on one forearm, which he began to sweep around in circles while staring at it's screen. "No, I got no sign of her energy signature!"

A scowling Shego almost ignored them, but suddenly her head snapped around as she came to a sudden halt. "Wait a minute, how the hell would you recognize my energy signature?"

The two boys peered at her, and the one not mounting a computer, but possessing a nose stud, asked rudely. "Who the hell are you?" Behind Shego, Bernie winced and was grateful she had learned the location of all seventeen First Aid kits hidden in the lair.

Shego's eyes narrowed dangerously. "I'm Shego!" She snapped hotly.

"The hell you are!" The guy replied. Save for his friend and the angry ex-villainess he now faced, there was now not a living soul with two cents for brains within thirty feet of him.

"Actually.." His friend interjected, "Her facial contours as well as general body measurements indicate that this is, in fact, Shego."

His friend looked shocked, looking back and forth between the seething Shego and his friend. "No way, Man! I mean, why the f- isn't she GREEN!" He pointed at Shego, his fingertip only inches from her nose while he glared at his buddy, "This bimbo is not Shego!" At this point, his partner took three steps back.

"Hey Kid..." The boy's eyes snapped back to Shego, who was holding up a plasma sheathed hand, "What's the melting point of that stud?"

"So would that be why so much of the medical kit in this place is geared towards treating burns?" Bernie asked dryly, just before the boy's eyes rolled up into his head, and he fainted dead away. "Not to mention smelling salts?" She added as she knelt down to see if the boy had hurt his head on the concrete floor.

Shego meanwhile turned her attention back to the still-standing geek, while noting irritably that the aliens had disappeared. "Again, how can you recognize my energy signature?"

The boy bared his teeth in a nervous grimace. "Well, in point of fact, I can't recognize the signature you're putting out now, it varies significantly from the data I downloaded from the...err, website..um, dedicated to you?"

"What's going on here?" The boy jumped as Jack Hench's voice boomed behind him. Then the entrepreneur continued in a more moderate tone. "Shego! You're not supposed to be knocking out the prospective buy..." Then his voice trailed off as he took a closer look at the unconscious boy. "Just who is this kid?" He asked with a frown, before turning to Hank Perkins, who snapped into a brace. "Just who did these two say they were, Perkins?"

The boy with the computer was getting paler by the second, and there was every chance his deodorant was on the verge of giving up the ghost.

"Ah, well, you see Sir, they told me they were evil interns, as I myself once was, so..." Hanks nervous speech was cut short by Hench.

"Interns! Interns don't buy lairs, Perkins! And I won't have them causing any disruptions! Have them thrown out immediately!" Hench snapped, while surveying the crowd.

Hank looked around nervously for a moment before replying "Mister Hench, Sir, we don't have anyone to do the throwing out!" He leaned closer to the man and lowered his voice, "There's no one at all here except Shego and me! I mean, it's a good thing all of Doctor Drakken's stuff was moved out earlier, or we'd have to worry about theft! Not to mention the number of our guests who have asked where Shego's quarters are for some reason."

"Probably hoping to see if I left anything in my underwear drawer!" Shego whispered to Bernie, before paying full attention to a clearly unhappy Hench.

"You didn't keep any of the henchmen for security purposes?" He asked her crossly.

"Their contract ran out Friday." Shego replied, "And your rates for short-term extensions was basically highway robbery, so no way was Doctor D going to pay them!" Then she shrugged, eyes now sweeping the room for some sign of the vanished aliens. "Besides, there's nothing to steal...that would fit in someone's pocket, anyway."

Hench's eyes narrowed slightly. Shego was subtly mentioning something that was a slight sore point with him. A small loophole in his lease that Drakken had spotted. And which had cost a couple of members of HenchCo's real estate office a great deal.

But right now, he turned to the three flunkies who had accompanied him to the lair, focusing on the two who were meant to provide security. "You two escort this pair of 'interns' out of here, will you?"

Shego smirked and started to turn away, only to be confronted by a slender looking Japanese man in a neat three-piece black suit with a red silk shirt who absolutely radiated menace. She tensed immediately, though it would have taken a very observant individual to notice it. "Something I can do for you?" She asked casually.

The man responded with a sharp nod. "Yes indeed you may." He replied politely, then faster then Bernie could follow it, he brought something out of his suit jacket and presented it to Shego, who took an involuntary step back. "It would honor me greatly if you would autograph, please?"

Bernie blinked, then recognized the item. It was a copy of HenchCo's Summer catalog. And in it, she knew, were several pictures of Shego modeling a line of 'intimate wear' designed by Jack Hench's current wife.(Which allegedly had special features of interest to Hench's usual clientele) She suppressed a snort with an effort, aided by the memory that she herself was also in the catalog, though her face didn't show in any pictures. And what did in one, she'd rather forget all about.

Shego recovered her composure quickly. And though she winced inwardly, she decided that it was a good idea not to tick off such an obviously dangerous individual. "Sure." She replied with a shrug, "Where do you want it signed?" Then as the man hastily leafed through the pages to find the spot, Shego spotted at least three more suddenly enboldened visitors pulling copies of the publication out and heading her way. "Oh, you have GOT to be kidding!"

"Yep, damn popular item, our Summer Catalog!" Hench boasted slyly, "Thinking of doing a supplement, using a few of the photos that didn't go in the first one!"

Having just completed her signature, Shego snapped her head around to glare at Hench. "Now, just a minute..." she began threateningly, then stopped when she realized Hench had an answer to her objections. Which he chose to voice anyway.

Hench smiled benignly as he shrugged expansively. "You signed the papers, Shego, the photos are ours to use as we see fit!"

Shego glared at his smug expression briefly, then turned to quickly sign the proffered catalogs. But even as she did, she noticed something familiar about a new arrival. "Don't look now," She said to Hench in a low voice, "But a cleverly disguised Will Du just came in."

Hench rolled his eyes, his expression souring. "'Cleverly Disguised' meaning he's a decoy to keep us from noticing other GJ agents slipping in, I take it?"

"He looks like a B-Movie Yakuza." Shego muttered as she signed the last catalog. For the moment, at least.

"And he doesn't look like the only infiltrator." Bernie whispered to her, "Or could there be another reason why that man's backside is glowing blue?"

Shego's face assumed an expression consistent with swallowing battery acid, as she smacked her forehead hard enough to make Bernie wince. "His glow increases wherever he tenses his muscles." She managed to grit out, "It's one of the reasons we insisted he never wear shorts as part of his costume!" She turned to take an actual look for herself, and groaned deep in her chest. "If he has a German accent to go with that get-up, I think I'll hurl! Got to get him out of here before Hench blames me for whatever happens next!" Checking to make sure Jack was busy networking, Shego strode casually towards her brother.

Bernie nodded and herself headed towards Will Du, prepared to perform a Heimlich Maneuver on the disguised agent. He'd also spotted and recognized Hego at an inopportune moment, while casually placing a canape in his mouth, and had apparently swallowed it whole.

Hego's outfit was that commonly associated with Oktoberfest, complete with Lederhosen and feathered hat. Shego didn't want to even ask who he was impersonating, though she had a sneaking suspicion. He was trying to affect a mean look, but it slipped considerably when he spotted Shego bearing down on him.

"Nervous, are we?"She asked in a low voice when she was close enough.

"Nervous? Not at all!" He replied automatically, "Er...do ve know each other, Frow-lane?"

Shego winced, looking around to see how many people were in earshot or even watching. She noticed Bernie patting Will Du on the back, but since the agent's back was turned, she didn't see the distressed look on his face. Then she ignored that nonsense and turned back to Hego. "Listen, Doofus, your cover's already blown, you need to get out of here, before someone tries something!" Then she preempted any answer he planned to make with another question. "And why exactly are you here, and not back in Go City?"

Looking back and forth in a terribly obvious attempt to spot eavesdroppers, Hego lowered his voice as much as he was able. "I'm here in response to a tip that a Go City villain is planning to attend! I'm certain it's Aviarius, this mountain lair would suit him perfectly!"

"That's all we'd need!" Shego thought sourly, but was reassured by something she knew that Hego didn't. "Listen, you big ox, nobody from Go received an invitation, Hench can't even put up with those loonies, even for business! So I repeat, you have to get out of here, now!"

"Nonsense! My disguise is well-nigh perfect, sister! You just go back to whatever disreputable things you were doing, and don't worry about me!"

Shego had been momentarily distracted by what she thought were the three aliens peering out from a passage on the far side of the chamber, obviously looking at Hego. Now she snapped her attention back to him. "Henry, do you remember the reason we banned you from including shorts in your uniform?"

He nodded crisply. "Why yes, there was an occasional problem with..." His voice trailed off, and his face began to darken as blood flooded into it along with realization. "It...it's glowing again, isn't it?" He whispered faintly.

"Why every insect in the area isn't trying to immolate itself on your butt, I have no idea." Shego replied. "Now, will you just go? I promise, if any of our home-grown villains show up here, I'll spot them, and make sure they don't do anything evil, okay?"

As her nervous brother nodded a hasty agreement, Shego was already failing on her promise. But with all the distractions, it was hardly surprising. Across the main chamber, a pair of men were forcing themselves to walk casually towards one of the exit passages. One was short and wiry, with thinning blond hair and a beak nose. The other was average in height and build, and actually quite handsome, with dark, wavy hair. They both wore business suits and sunglasses. The latter were not entirely incongruous in the well-lit lair.

As soon as they had slipped into the passage, the taller man visibly relaxed, leaning on the passage wall. "Whew! I was so sure she'd spot me at the last moment!" Then he looked at his companion, smiling widely. "But so far, my plan is working! Now, all we have to do is find what we're after, then you have to get past security, and the prize will be mine!" He kept his voice low.

His companion nodded, not returning the smile. "I assure you whatever security is in place here will not deter me, you will soon have what you desire." He said confidently.

The taller man clapped him on the back. "I have no doubts, my friend! Soon, Go City will tremble at the sight of the new improved, Tin Plate Tyrant!" He opened his mouth as if to laugh aloud, then stopped and cast a cautious glance back towards the main chamber, before chuckling softly. But maniacally.

His companion nodded approvingly. "You seem to have mastered the art of ranting at low volume, I am impressed!"

The Tyrant nodded happily. "Thank You! Now, let's proceed, shall we?" He looked back the way they had come. "I do wonder who that German muscle guy was that Shego was talking to?"

"He looked more Austrian to me." The other replied.

The Tyrant shrugged. "Whatever! In any event, the Day-Glo blue shorts were really tacky, he must have consulted those Fashionistas!" His companion nodded in agreement as they walked purposefully down the passage, deeper into the mountain lair.

0XX0X0XX0X0XX0X0XX0X0XX0

Well, a new story, which I intended to be a one-shot. Instead the need to post something has be putting it up as possibly the shortest chapter I've ever written.

For now, Please Read and Review.