A/N; There can be more than one regret in the lives of the men of Stalag 13. Here's my second attempt at a one shot themed of regrets, personally I am aware this is not as deep as the last but this one was supposed to have a bit of humour. Please review, Seth:]
Hiding behind a tree outside the wire I spotted Newkirk and LeBeau crouching to my right. We were timing the rotation of the spot lights from the towers. So far everything had gone right, heck no patrols or nothing, now we just had to get back into camp. Then in half an hours time ba-boom. The bush in front of me lit up briefly, as it dimmed I ran to the stump and opened it. The guys stepped in and descended into the tunnels before I followed suit. My CO stood waiting for us down there, just as he always was when he could.
"Well?" The Colonel asked, trying to conceal the worry he felt every time we went out on missions alone.
"No problems Colonel," LeBeau chirped happily.
"Everything got wired up right Carter?" Col Hogan enquired cautiously.
"Boy is it ever, in twenty minutes ka-blewy." I grinned proudly before wiping more of the black grease on my face.
"I kept an eye on 'im the 'ole time, should be a right mess tomorrow." Newkirk laughed clapping me on the shoulder.
"Good work, finish up down here then get some sack time. You lot have earnt it."
I swear I saw the Colonel sigh in relief before he turned and headed towards the radio room. Okay I admit I've fowled up big time before but really? I wasn't that bad was I? Shrugging I grabbed my hat and jacket off the peg; they'd tell me if I was. LeBeau and Newkirk chatted in undertones as I followed them up top.
"G' Night guys," I whispered as everyone else in the room was sleeping.
"Bon soir Carter," LeBeau replied softly.
"Night Andrew," Newkirk gruffly answered as he leapt onto the bunk above mine.
Ugh, why did military bunks have to be so uncomfortable I cursed for what must have been the hundredth time stretching out on my own bunk. Yawning I curled up on my side waiting to listen out for the explosion. I never heard it as my eyelids drew heavier and I drifted off.
Waking later than usual I was drinking my coffee in a rush before Schultz came for roll call. No one was talking. Although most mornings after a big one, everyone was bushed still so I just kept to myself and waited.
"Roll caaalll! Everybody raus! Roll call..." The fat Sergeant yelled bursting open the barracks door in his cheerful manner.
"Morning Schultzie," I smiled at him warmly as my name got called.
No matter what happened I always felt for that man; he was just a teddy bear, soft to the core. It was always difficult trying to think of him as the enemy; Schultz was just too nice - he was a Betty Grable compared with Frau Linkmeyer at any Goon standard.
"Dismissed," Klink screamed breaking my train of thought.
"My office, now," The Colonel instructed as he held the door for us to enter the barracks.
We gathered round the table in his quarters like we usually did, but something was off. Sure the Colonel was pacing like a caged tiger, Kinch was impossible to read; LeBeau and Newkirk however, were sterner than normal. That was what baffled me.
"Carter, you're sure you set the bomb right?" Hogan asked straight off the bat as the door closed behind him.
"Sure I'm sure, why?" My heart was sinking, I felt sick just thinking of reasons why I was being questioned. "Colonel?"
"Don't ask..." Colonel Hogan sighed, signaling Kinch to follow him.
Confused I watched them as they left the private quarters and went down into the tunnels. With a guilty conscious I sat on the Colonel's bunk, frantically trying to remember what I must've done wrong. There wasn't anything though, it had been a piece of pie.
"Can't you do anything right? 'Eck that's the third mission you fowled up this week! Why don't ya do us a favor and join the bloody Nazis?" Newkirk asked about as kindly as a rattle snake hissed.
LeBeau continued to stare hard and cold in my general direction. Not even bothering to put his feelings into words. Somehow they were beyond being mad or even disappointed. Hanging my head lower than I thought possible in shame, turning invisible or plain old disappearing would be perfect right now. Gee, how can someone be stupid enough to accidentally blow up their High School and not purposefully blow up a bridge? Maybe I should just get outta here, all I ever do is put my foot in things.
Deciding, I climbed out the Colonel's window and headed to Barracks Four. It was empty at the moment which suited my needs perfectly. Where did we hide the tunnel entrance? Smiling sadly I headed to the stove, a small push revealed the ladder down into our underground network. Grimacing as I heard the Colonel's and Kinch's voice coming towards me I ran down the closet off branch without thinking of where it went.
Oh great, the cooler. Trust my luck to lead me here. At least it was the last place any one would look, I mean the Colonel's even laid low down here for a few days for Pete's sake. Opening the floor panel carefully in case a guard was patrolling down here I continued to pull myself up before closing it up equally as careful. Sitting against the wall, again racking memories to figure out what went wrong.
"There you are Andrew," Kinch called, his head sticking out of the floor. "The Colonel was just about to call in Klink to search for you."
"Oh," I got to my feet and walked over.
"Whatcha doing down here anyway?"
"Hiding, planning on trying to get back home..." Deflated by my answer I descended back into the tunnels.
"Why?" Kinch asked suspiciously.
"Well, Newkirk and LeBeau were so mad at me and I keep screwing up. You guys would be better off without me."
"Those two had no idea what they were on about Carter and neither do you. How about we mess with them and then let the Colonel explain later, okay?" The Sergeant and friend in him looked quite annoyed for me.
"That sounds great, but how is it not my fault?" I asked relieved though still confused.
"You'll see. Now, how would you like to watch LeBeau and Newkirk have a giant attack of the guilts?" Kinch said without masking the banter in his voice.
"I doubt they would."
"Trust me Andrew, they will." He grinned before pointing me in the direction of the planning room.
Standing in the dark room, I heard Kinch talking to the Colonel who was so far had been silent since Kinch had me stand in here. Hearing the footsteps on the ladder rungs Colonel Hogan's voice echoed through me.
"What do you mean you can't find him…? How? Never mind that. Why?!"
Even though I knew the Colonel was acting, it still hurt to hear him so disappointed in me.
"It's my fault Colonel, I laid it on 'im pretty thick this mornin'." Newkirk broke in sounding really depressed.
"Moi aussi, I was also to blame Colonel." Louis admitted quietly.
"Well hope your happy with yourselves, he's gone out to try and blow that bridge. London have a squadron already out and won't call them back!" Colonel Hogan sounded so angry that I had to feel sorry for them.
"Well what are we waiting for let's go get 'im!" Newkirk exclaimed panicky.
"No one is to set foot out of this camp in a possible air raid, understood?" The Colonel threatened. "I don't want to have to write to your folks as well."
"But what about Andrew!" LeBeau shouted, clearly upset with the order.
"He'll have to chance it," was the deadpan reply and it didn't sound very confident.
It was quiet for a long time before the Colonel called me out. I felt kinda ashamed that I had honestly considered deserting him; I mean he always did what he could for us. He treated me like I was actually worth something and he was the first person to place any faith in me... Looking I saw both Corporals and Kinch had left.
"I'm sorry Colonel," I began but was cut off before I could say anything more.
"You've got nothing to be sorry for Carter. The Goons inspected the bridge before sending a convoy across. They found the bomb and defused it." The Colonel explained gently.
"No. I meant about wanting to leave Sir."
"Carter, you never even left the camp. As far as I'm concerned you took some time out to get your head straight." He placed his hand on my shoulder steering me towards the ladder, "Now we should probably let those two hot heads know you're alright before they leave camp. Hopefully they'll think before they speak next time." He finished, laughing.
It was infectious, but it quickly died in my throat as I stood in the barracks seeing the two fairly paranoid Englishman and Frenchman. Oh boy was I in for it now, when Newkirk's worried he shouts worse than when he's angry and LeBeau looked ready to either join in or faint. Either way, I was in for it.
A/N: Hoped you enjoyed it, the only characters left to play round with is Hogan, Klink and Schultz, I would love to hear any possible cannon scenarios that you might want me to incorporate into the next and most likely last Regrets story.