Disclaimer: Card Captor Sakura belongs to CLAMP & the song "Like We Used To" belongs to Rocket to the Moon.
Like We Used To
In an apartment somewhere in Tomoeda, a man with chestnut hair sat facing the window. The look on his face; it was heartbreaking. He was staring out into the horizon. He just witnessed the woman he loved with a new man in her life.
Syaoran Li began humming the tune of a song that used to be so important to him and Sakura Kinomoto, the love of his life. Now, it was only important to him. Before long, he started singing with words.
"I can feel her breath as she's sleeping next to me
Sharing pillows and cold feet
She can feel my heart, fell asleep to its beat
Under blankets and warm sheets
If only I could be in that bed again
If only it were me instead of him"
When they were merely 10 years of age, Syaoran Li came to Japan and a girl with emerald eyes befriended him when no one else did. It wasn't long until he acquired a little crush on her. He would stutter and blush in her presence but all the torture was worth it when he told her how he felt and she reciprocated it with the same feelings.
As things got more serious, they began living together and he would always watch Sakura sleep on his chest. He could feel her even breaths as she dreamed. He always wondered if she felt how his heart would still race at the sight of her; even though it had been years. He would put his arms around her and feel her legs intertwine with his.
Now, however, someone else was occupying the space he left. Sakura has replaced him in her life.
"Does he watch your favorite movies?
Does he hold you when you cry?
Does he let you tell him all your favorite parts?
When you've seen it a million times"
A memory played in his mind where he and Sakura were watching Titanic. It was her favourite movie. No matter how many times she watched it, she would still cry at the ending were Jack suffers a tragic death and Rose had no other choice but to let go of the hands of her lost love. Sakura would always tell him to watch out for certain scenes because they were memorable and she would utter the memorable lines as tears clouded her vision. This had happened many times before but he'll never get tired of it. Sakura looked cute and he didn't have the nerve to hurt her feelings.
"Does he sing to all your music
While you dance to "Purple Rain"?
Does he do all these things
Like I used to?"
Sakura loved to dance to the tune of Purple Rain while Syaoran would sing it for her. Now he's got himself questioning if this new man was doing these things for her.
"14 months and 7 days ago
Oh, I know you know how we felt about that night
Just your skin against the window
But we took it slow and we both know
It shoulda been me inside that car
It should have been me instead of him in the dark"
It was now already the second week of May; 2 years since he proposed to Sakura. Of course, she said yes and they couldn't be any happier. They kissed under the moonlight but they agreed to stop before they go any further. They were saving that special moment for their wedding night. They shared one last kiss inside his car before he drove home.
A few months ago, however he saw Sakura slipping into the back seat of the man's car and he waited for her to come out. It took an hour or two before she got out with her dishevelled. He knew what had happened and he couldn't stop thinking that it was supposed to be him holding her.
"Does he watch your favorite movies?
Does he hold you when you cry?
Does he let you tell him all your favorite parts
When you've seen it a million times?Does he sing to all your music
While you dance to 'Purple Rain'?
Does he do all these things
Like I used to?I know, love
(Well, I'm a sucker for that feeling)
Happens all the time, love
(I always end up feeling cheated)
You're on my mind, love
(Oh sorta let her when I need it)
That happens all the time, love, yeah"
Now, Syaoran finds himself in Sakura's bedroom. He was watching her sleep like he used to when they were still together. He was wondering where his replacement was. Noticing he wasn't there, he sat down next to Sakura on the bed and touched her cheek with one of his hands and said,
"Will he love you like I loved you?
Will he tell you everyday?
Will he make you feel like you're invincible
With every word he'll say?
Can you promise me if this was right?
Don't throw it all away"
"Syaoran?" Sakura muttered, she was still half asleep.
"I know nobody will love you like I loved you Sakura; the way I still do. But I don't care if he comes close or just half as that. If he makes you happy or treats you like the princess you are, don't let him go. Don't stop living your life because of one failed relationship. I love you, Sakura. I love you so much." He whispered but he knew his voice weren't heard by the sleeping beauty beside him. He kissed her forehead before he parted.
Next Day
"Why did you break up with Ken, Sakura?" Tomoyo asked her
"It wouldn't be fair to him. Everything I show him is fake; deep inside it will always be him." Tomoyo held Sakura's hand as a sad expression was etched on her face. "I saw him last night, you know? Syaoran, he was in my bedroom last night."
"You know that isn't possible, Sakura."
"I'm not kidding. You have to believe me, Syaoran was really there."
"That's impossible Sakura. You know Syaoran died a month before your wedding." Syaoran Li died in a car accident. He picked up a gift for Sakura's birthday and was on his way home when a truck came out of nowhere and collided with his car. Sakura was crying her eyes out when she heard the news but it toned down when the police gave her a present wrapped in pink wrapping paper. After she finished tearing the wrapper, she saw a scrapbook inside. It was a collection of all the special things they used to do.
"Whether it was my imagination or not, I won't stop doing this like he was still here. I want to live for him. I want it to be like he never left. I want to do all the things like we used to." Sakura stood up and said goodbye to Tomoyo and rode her car.
She stopped by the cemetery and sat in front of a familiar grave.
"Hey, Syaoran. There's no one to watch Titanic or dance Purple Rain with but I can't get myself to stop watching them. They make me feel like you're still here. I miss you, Syaoran Li. Why did you have to go?" I tear fell from Sakura's left eye before she continued, "I love you and I'll keep doing things like we used to." She kissed the marble tombstone and walked away.
"Can you do all these things?
Will you do all these things
Like we used to?
Oh, like we used to"
She failed to see that there was a man standing beside her, looking at her with so much love in his eyes.
"I love you too, Sakura."