A/N: Extreme fluff ahead. You've been warned :P

"You are such a nerd."

Jo scoffed. "Please, Alex. Just 'cause I'm into Harry Potter, it does not mean I'm a nerd. I'm simply a fan of good literature."

"I never said liking Harry Potter automatically makes you a nerd. The fact that you are currently wearing a full costume, though, does."

Jo glanced down quickly at her outfit – a white button-down shirt paired with a black pencil skirt that went to her knees, topped off with her red- and gold-striped tie and black cloak. She merely shrugged as a response. "It's obvious that you're just jealous."

"Jealous of what? Your ugly-ass tie?"

Jo gasped. "This tie is not ugly. It represents bravery, righteousness and – "

"A terrible lack of style?"

Jo glared at her boyfriend. "Whatever. I'll be the one laughing soon enough."

Alex narrowed his eyes slightly, trying to figure out his wacko girlfriend. "Why would you be laughing? I'm not the one dressed like a confused Catholic school girl."

"Let me tell you something, Alex. You, my friend, are going to be a Slytherin, and I am going to be a Gryffindor. So that is why I'll be laughing," she announced, pointing her wand at him condescendingly.

"You might as well have just told me that my ass is polka-doted for all I know," Alex admitted, raising his hands in defeat. "Can you just tell me what all of this means?"

Jo smiled. "So I've finally gotten you to cave?" Alex glared at her. "Right, sorry. So basically, there's this boy named Harry, and he finds out that he's a wizard, so he goes to this school for all the witches and wizards in Great Britain called Hogwarts."

"Hogwarts?"

"Yes, Hogwarts, and don't make fun, okay, because it's an amazing school. Anyway, at Hogwarts, you get sorted into one of four houses – Gryffindor, Slytherin, Hufflepuff, and Ravenclaw. Gryffindor is for the brave and chivalrous, Slytherin is for the cunning and ambitious, Hufflepuff is for the loyal and hard working, and Ravenclaw is for the clever and witty. Gryffindors have a tendency to be heroes, Slytherins usually turn out to be evil, Ravenclaws are just geniuses, and Hufflepuffs are… Hufflepuffs."

"So, wait a second," Alex said. "Are you saying that I'm evil?"

"Of course not, Alex," Jo sighed. "There are always exceptions. You'd be a good Slytherin. Well, you'd be as good of a Slytherin as possible."

Alex nodded. "I can deal with that."

"Alright! Are you ready to take the quiz, then?"

"Sure," Alex agreed. "But are you sure you're ready? You look a bit… jumpy."

Jo was suddenly aware of the fact that she was tapping her foot incessantly. "I'm ready. Just kinda nervous, but ready."

"Okay, then, let's get started," Alex announced, opening his laptop. "What was the website called again?"

"Pottermore," Jo answered instantly.

"This side of you is freaking scary," Alex admitted, his eyes going wide. "Alright. I've got it. Do you wanna go first, or – "

"No!" Jo exclaimed.

Alex raised his eyebrows. "Are you sure you can do this?"

Jo exhaled sharply. "Yeah, yeah, I can do this. You just have to go first."

Alex smiled at his girlfriend. She looked cute when she was nervous. "Okay, here I go."

"I think that this is the last question," Jo whispered over Alex's shoulder, eyes wide. "Oh, my God, my hands are shaking. Left or right? Which one should you choose? Let's think through this, okay? Left symbolizes order, strategy – Did you just pick right!? We didn't even go through the consequences!"

"Calm down, Princess, let's just let it load, and then we'll see what home I'm in."

"I think you mean hou – You're in Gryffindor!?" Jo exclaimed, jumping back in surprise as the computer screen filled with red and gold banners. "Oh, my God, you're a Gryffindor!"

"Yay?" Alex said. "Does this mean that we're together?"

Jo grinned. "It does! Let me just take the quiz real quick so we know for sure."

"I can't look," Jo declared, handing the laptop over to Alex. "Press next, and then tell me what it says. I can't look."

Alex rolled his eyes. "You know that none of this is real, right?"

"Shut up. It's real to me, okay? When I was getting kicked around from foster home to foster home, I would just always look forward to getting my hands on the next Harry Potter book and spending time with Harry, Ron, and Hermione, and I know how stupid that sounds but – "

Green and silver banners popped up the screen in front of Alex. Welcome to the House of Slytherin!

"What? What is it? Did the results come up? What am I?" Jo interrogated, her foot beginning to tap again.

"You're, uh – you're a Gryffindor!" he announced, closing out of the window and shutting the computer.

Jo literally screamed. "I knew it! I knew it! This is the best day of my life!"

Alex grinned. "I knew you had it in you, Princess. You're the bravest, most loyal, most courageous girl I've ever known."

Jo smiled. "Good try, except being loyal is more of a Hufflepuff thing."

"I still don't get all this hate against Hufflepuffs. They seem like good, dedicated people to me."

Jo rolled her eyes. "It's just a thing, okay? You'd understand if you read the books."

Alex laughed. "I'll take your word on this one, Hermione."

"What the hell!" Jo heard someone exclaim. She groaned, rolling over to check what time it was. 3:24 A.M.

"Alex," Jo whispered, turning over. "Alex, did you hear – " But Alex wasn't in bed next to her.

"Alex!" she called, internally cursing him as she threw her covers off and began to get out of bed. "Alex, are you okay?"

"I – uh, I'm fine! Go back to sleep!" he answered. Jo raised her eyebrows as she noticed that the bathroom light was on. Tip-toeing over, she knocked on the door a few times.

"Alex? What are you doing? It's almost three-thirty."

"Shit! I didn't realize it was that late. I'm – I'm coming. Just give me a second."

There was a brief silence followed by some rustling. Turning the lights off, Alex slowly opened the door to find an unamused Jo waiting for him outside.

"What the hell were you doing in there?" she hissed, crossing her arms.

Alex laughed. "Do you really wanna know?"

Jo squinted, trying to get a better look at him. "Wait a minute, are you hiding something behind your back?"

Even though it was dark, Jo was fairly sure that Alex was blushing. "Um, no."

"If you don't tell me, I'm going to think it's something much worse than it actually is."

Alex sighed and handed her the object, mumbling something indistinctly.

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

"It's the first Harry Potter book, okay?" he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. "I found it lying around, and I figured I should try it out. I just found out that Voldemort is in the forest eating unicorns, so that was why I got a little carried away." Jo smirked at him. "Don't you dare say 'I told you so.'"

"I'm not saying anything," Jo said. "Now, you can finish this in the morning. Let's go to sleep."

Alex nodded, walking back to the bed with her. "Hey, Jo?" he asked her once they were settled.

"What?"

"Do Harry and Hermione end up together?"

Jo laughed. "I think I'm going to enjoy this."

A/N: So I'm back! I've been gone for an unforgivable amount of time, and I'm so, so, so sorry about that. Thank you all for understanding... I was going through some difficult times, but I'm ready to start writing again. :)

Also, thanks a million for reading! Please favorite, follow, review, etc.! I hope you enjoyed it, and I love you all!

P.S. The title is a direct quote from Harry Potter. Just wanted to give J.K. Rowling credit :P