The Heroes Crack!Fic to End All Crack!Fics
By: PhoenixJustice
Disclaimer: I don't own Heroes, Tim Kring does, but could I just borrow Kensei, Hiro, Nathan, Peter, Claire, Sylar, Mohinder, Matt, H.R.G and co. for awhile? D
Warning: T for kissies, utter, utter crack!fic, incest, NBC, slash, het, writers, writers strike, livejournal, some people from livejournal, etc.
Feedback/Archive: Yeah, sure, you can reply to this weird thing. XD Ask me if you want to archive this.
Pairings: Kensei/Hiro (David/Masi), Nathan/Peter (Adrian/Milo) Paire, (Milo/Hayden), Mylar (Sendhil/Zachary), H.R.G/Claude (Jack/Christopher), Plaude (Milo/Christopher), Matt/Mohinder (Greg/Sendhil), etc.
Setting: Sometime after S2 wraps up. XD
Summary: "…Want to rehearse that same scene that Masi and David did about fifteen times?"
A/N: Dude, what the hell is wrong with me? XD
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Beep.
He pushes the flashing button on his phone.
"What is it?" he barks into the receiver.
His assistant speaks up.
"Um, sir…There's a large group outside."
He snorts ineloquently.
"Of course there is; we're in the middle of a writer's strike."
"Um…that's not who I mean, sir. You should probably look out your window."
He moves out of his expensive leather chair and walks over to his window. Outside were the writers that were on strike, but with them was a rather large group, seemingly composed of all women and were holding up signs of their own, they read;
"We'll write Heroes for you!"
The president of NBC raises an eyebrow.
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Knock.
"What is it?" he barks through the door.
His assistant opens the door, holding a clipboard which had many papers on it.
"Sir, there's a group of women outside in the lobby waiting to talk to you. They said that they'd be willing to write Heroes for us…"
The president of NBC looks at his assistant with a raised brow, wondering if he was having some kind of weird sense of humor, seeing none, he waves a hand at him.
"Well, we don't have anything else. Bring them in and let me speak with them one at a time—"
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He walks past the writers, nodding towards them and their cause and walks inside the NBC building where Heroes was stationed at.
The gate opens and he starts to walk through when a girl suddenly walks right up next to him, a large stack of paper in her hands.
"I'm a fanfic writer and I'm willing to write Heroes for you, Mr. Tim Kring."
He raises a brow.
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Milo scratches his head as he looks at the script, turning to look at Adrian who was looking at the script with raised brows.
"A fanfic writer?" said Milo. "And the stuff in this script…can we really get away with all of this? Won't people be mad?"
"…Not most people," muttered Adrian, holding up the now rolled up script loosely in one hand. "The vast majority of our fans are fangirls, which most of them tend to write lots of fic."
Masi walks in, looking at David bemusedly who walks in after him.
"So…did we really have to rehearse that scene fifteen times in a row?"
David smirks.
"Hey, if you're going to do something; do it right. She put it in the script…and don't tell me that you didn't enjoy it."
Masi blushes.
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The new writer on staff for Heroes, tells her ultra good fortune to her friends at livejournal, and at the Kensei/Hiro community swordmates, which she was apart of on livejournal. They were overjoyed and amazed.
…Even more so when she told them that she could hire them up as writers as well.
Fangirls rejoiced that day and the world was changed;
Fangirls were ruling their favorite show!
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"Hayden?"
"Yeah, Milo?"
"…Want to rehearse that same scene that Masi and David did about fifteen times?"
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"I think I'm one of the few that isn't involved in any slash," said Jack Coleman.
"Yet," said tjutjutjutju with a maniacal sort of laugh.
"Yeah!" said PhoenixJustice, the person who had been hired originally to do the writing for Heroes. "We all love H.R.G!"
There was a general consensus amongst the fangirls/fanfic writers and Jack had the strangest feeling that H.R.G would be seeing a lot of Claude soon…
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"Yay for the flashback H.R.G/Claude-ness!" said PhoenixJustice.
'Claude' was running his hand up H.R.G's shirt.
"Don't you worry any, Noah," breathed Claude. "I'll take good care of you; you can be sure on that…"
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The fanfic writers were all kind of hanging out with some of the cast members while they were watching Sendhil and Zachary film their scene.
"But Mo-hinder! I don't think you quite understand what I mean…perhaps I will have to demonstrate for you?"
"Now Sylar, what is going on in that devious brain of yo—mmph! " He gets silenced by a long kiss.
"This'll appease the Mylar fans." said PhoenixJustice.
"Isn't the next scene some Nathan/Peter?" asked everworld2662.
There were some nods and smiles.
Milo was trying not to look at Adrian because he felt himself blushing. Adrian, strangely enough, was smirking. Maybe he caught it from David or something.
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There was something strangely gratified with seeing Milo and Christopher doing their scene. Runningondreams was looking quite squee-happy, as were many, many of the fangirl/writers. There were quite a few napkins distributed around the office from all the drool and nosebleeds.
As the fangirls watch the Plaude scene, Greg goes over his script with raised eyebrows.
"I have to do what to who to where??"
Sendhil pats him on the shoulder.
"Don't worry, I promise I won't be too rough with you…"
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Then; finally, the moment they had all been working hard on; S3 of Heroes was up and running!
The first episode had a record 100 million people watching it; there were reports of many faints, nosebleeds, drool, and vacant expressions many days after the fact.
Success!
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----- "Kensei, I cannot believe that you ever…wait! Are you…why are you…?" Hiro gets shut up with a big kiss from the Sword Saint, getting pushed up against the wall and moaning into his mouth.
"Do shut up, carp. There are much better uses for your mouth right now and I'll show you…" -----
She finishes up the part where it would lead into a commercial, trying not to drool as she watches David and Masi going over…lines together. With their mouths.
Success!
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A/N: ZOMG! –is trying hard not to laugh right now—Dude, omg. I hope this turned out well; I just started the first part of this one day out of the blue because I was bored and I just finished it up now.
Enjoy… --snickering—
--PhoenixJustice