**I've already uploaded this once, but it was extremely jumbled up, apologies but I don't know what happened... hopefully this reads better!**

Present.

Christian gasped for air, beads of sweat rolling down the back of his neck, between his shoulder blades; a pane of light escaped the moon as it filtered through a gap in the blinds.

She stirred gently against him, her mass of blonde hair reaching out, desperate to tangle him in their embrace.

He grimaced and swung his legs over the side of the bed, checking the time "2:00AM?" He groaned, his nights were getting shorter and shorter thanks to the reoccurring dreams, they'd eased when He had met Anastasia, but a Year without her and they were back…. With vengeance!

He padded across the cool marble floor, stealing a glance back over at the sleeping blonde, desperate not to wake her; He couldn't deal with her persistent questioning or irritating belief that she understood.

His study offered dedicated peace and escape; Christian led a privileged life, but it was a privilege that he'd worked for, a privilege he'd earned.

Taking comfort in the soft leather against his bear back Christian opened the laptop, entered the password and inhaled a deep and satisfied breath as her name flagged up on the screen.

Christian Grey - 'Anna? Are you there?'

He took a slug of whisky and stretched back, running his fingers through his tussled hair.

Anastasia Steele - 'I'm here Christian, another bad dream?'

He sat upright and felt the corner of his mouth lift, it was better now, the heavy feeling already lifting, the panic melting away.

His fingers stroked against each key with speed, the quicker he replied, the quicker he'd hear back from her.

Christian Grey - 'Of course! It's been every night for the past Month… my whole life is a never ending nightmare'

He watched the dots bouncing across the bottom of the message window, he imagined her slender fingers planning their next move as they responded, her earthy brown hair would be piled on top of her head, an oversized jumper would swamp her small frame, she'd be biting her lip now, she always did that when she concentrated.

Anastasia Steele - 'Did you write it in your diary? I bet you didn't, did you? Oh Christian! You frustrate me so much!'

He couldn't help the snigger that escaped his mouth, she knew every aspect of him, she knew him better than he knew himself.

Christian Grey - 'I can't find my pen… how frustrated are you exactly, Anastasia?'

Christian stroked the tip of his forefinger over the letter 'A' that familiar sensation rippling through him.

Anastasia Steele - 'Christian! Don't!'

Christian Grey – 'Don't what, Anna? Don't excite you! Don't make you feel alive! Don't desire you!'

And then, nothing, She'd gone, He'd scared her off… again!

Christian checked the time once more – 2:35AM, making a decision He pulled down his boxers on route to the shower, revelling in the penetrating heat as it rushed against his chest.

His mind drifted back to a time when she'd shared the same penetrating heat, a time when he'd felt her supple breasts beneath his palm, a time when she'd desperately moaned his name.

He pulled on sweatpants and a hooded jumper, there'd be no one else in the office today and He needed to run!

Christian savoured the feeling of punishment surging through his body, every muscle throbbing, his breathing shallow, it was the closest he came to his old life… to how she made him feel.

The usual bustle of the office had been left behind when Christians staff had left Friday afternoon, it was a rarity to truly experience and appreciate the sheer magnitude of his building, and it was just that… he'd designed it, built it and now spent more of his life inside it than he'd ever expected.

Swinging his legs up onto his desk Christian logged into his laptop and waited for the messages to come flooding into his email box, He'd only been out of the office 24 hours but in his World business didn't break for the weekends.

He held his breath as her name filtered through, standing out from anything else….

'Christian,

I don't know what to say to you anymore, I feel like I'm making it worse… not just for you but for all three of us!

You should be turning to her, Christian! Elena is the one you chose! I couldn't become the person you needed, I let you down… I let 'Us' down and it's taken me the past Year to come to terms with the loss of you! I've mourned you, Christian and I've mourned 'Us' please let me move on with my life.

Forever Your Anna'

He felt his forehead tense, his eyes cloud over and his jaw lock, what kind of shit was that! She was playing games, she was playing the kind of games the others had played and that wasn't Anna, it wasn't how she operated!

Her words engraved in his mind as He stabbed against the keys.

'Anastasia,

Don't say anything! Forget about 'all three of us' there is no 'three of us' there is me and Elena and me and You!

I don't 'turn' to anyone, Anna! Elena shares my bed and my money but that is where it begins and ends, I didn't 'choose' Elena… she was already there, she's always been there and when YOU left me, she picked up the pieces you'd left behind!

And you've 'mourned' me, 'mourned' us, have you? You're over it? I don't buy it, Anna! I'm not that easy to get over.

Your undead Christian.'

His phone moved across the desk, He toyed with the idea of silencing it against the office wall… but that would be just one more ball-ache it could do without right now.

"Elena. Is everything ok?"

"Surly I should be asking you that question, Christian! You're the one that ran out on me, yet again! I presume you're at the office?"

He felt the pencil give way beneath his hand, throwing it to the floor he paced the office, it didn't matter how much space he gave himself, it was never enough, he would always feel like a caged animal.

"My aren't you bright, lover! Yes, Elena, I am indeed at the office… where else would I be?" she laughed faintly.

"Who knows, Christian! You're hardly Mr. Predictable!"

"And wouldn't life be boring as hell if I were!" He felt the darkness surrounding him, his mind clouding over, it was Anna… it was always Anna! She did this to him.

"Come to the office" He demanded "Don't wear anything under your coat and do not wear your hair down! Do you understand me, Elena?"

He could hear the steady excitement in her voice.

"Oh I understand, Christian… shall I bring… anything with me?" He knew exactly what she meant by that.

"It won't be necessary, Elena… I have everything I need here"