"Sir, Mr. Odinson has left the tower and is heading to pick up Ms. Jane for their departure."
Tony's hands twitched over the hologram of his new prototype for the iron man gauntlets before continuing its fast pace. Really this shouldn't be a big deal, he's had weeks to prepare already, and yet the load on his chest just got a ton heavier. He dreaded to ask but "...and Loki?"
"Mr. Laufeyson is currently not in the building. Sir if I may suggest, simply talk with him and stop sulking. You may-"
"Didn't ask for a suggestion J, and Daddy's not sulking." Despite knowing that nothing will come of it, he glared at the nearest camera sensor in sight and continued his work.
Tony signed. Figures he wouldn't be in the tower, not even to say goodbye. Hell Loki didn't even bother telling Tony that he was leaving, stupid fucking prick, just coming and going as he pleased, such a great lover he is...then again, he's not much better. Despite it being a year since they're relationship, thoughts of betrayal or being dumped raged in his head, after all a humans' measly average lifespan of 80yrs is hardly anything compared to that of a Gods, he is easily replaceable. Thought whirling around, emotions circling from irritation, to anger to sadness and repeat, Tony signed hands going down.
Being a learning AI, although some say emotions are impossible to be learned, Jarvis has been around long enough to understand his creator and at times like this it is best to engage to distract his quote and quote dad, the thought sparking warmth to spread in his servers. "Perhaps I was mistaken, Sir. However according to research, locking yourself in the lab for 78hrs, refusing contact with others and working with a sullen and forlorn expression is under the scope and definition of sulking."
"Where is this sass coming from?" Tony placed his hands on his hips glaring at the sensor. "You know what, I can't take this ridicules! I'm gonna donate you to a local collage, see if you like repeatedly droning out lectures on repeat."
"I am shivering in my artificial boots sir, however you have not denied my statement, also Mr. Laufeyson is-"
"I am not sulking!"
"If Jarvis says you are, then you are sulking, I believe there will have been a basis for it, Anthony."
"Loki?"
Lo and behold. Tony's eyes widened staring as the God of mischief laid on his couch as if he was there the entire time. "Shit! How long-? Jarvis, you fucking traitor!"
"How long have you been there? Heart condition, remember? Do you really want to be rid of me already? Im hurt! "
"I have just arrived and I doubt you will be taken down quite dear Anthony." Smirking Loki fell into their usual banter, finding comfort that his lover is at least acting as close to normal as possible at the moment however that will not do for long. While Loki appreciates a good lie, he does not accept it from his lover, especially if it brings him back to these types of self-destructive behavior.
Hearing a clamor of beeps nearing him, Loki smiled. Smoothly sliding up from laying on the couch, "How me makes that look so graceful is so unfair!" Loki greeted the bots enthusiastic greeting with a pat on their mechanical bodies. DUM-E, Yu and Butterfingers stayed and played with Loki each one clamoring to get his attention. Tony smiled forlorn, before quickly turning back to his project. "How could I have forgotten the kids?. How will I explain it to those three…"
A little over an hour later the three bots returned to their charging stations. Sitting up, legs crossed Loki gazed unnervingly at his lover.
"You're staring." Tony stated, words coming up short.
"Can I no longer admire a good view? After all is has been a month since we were last together Anthony.".
Yeah well whose fault is that? I'm not the one coming and going, in fact I'm pretty much stuck here on Earth, it isn't that hard to find me. Tony thought his gaze falling off of Loki and turning back to his project.
"Anthony-"
"What do you want Loks? Im pretty sure you have to pack for tonight and I am rather busy."
"Pack?"
"For Asgard, I overheard you talking with Thor about going back along with Jane."
"Ah yes, Thor is has asked Jane's hand for marriage and they plan to leave Midgard for good. Thor has asked me to come along, and I agreed." Loki stated, lax against the couch
Eyes clenched, Tony's hands stilled completely. Hands shaking, form trembling, why was everything so cold? The memory of that night came flooding back.
"...stay in asgard for good. Will you honor me this brother?"
"Of course Thor, I shall go with you"
He could only hear the blood rushing through his ears, head and heart pounding. He remembered running after that.
"-ony?"
Running. Hiding. Alone. Yes, thats what he did best after all.
"-thony?!"
Breathe. You have to breathe. Useless lungs, why wont they work?
"Anthony!"
Loki? No, Its couldn't be. He's leaving...just like them, like Agent, like Happy, like Pepper, like...mom. Gone. Alone. Its dark. Inside the void.
"-ir is having a panic attack"
Don't leave. Don't leave me alone. I don't want to be alone anymore. I'm scared. Fuck I'm terrified. Everything that's left of me, I gave it to you. Please...!
"ANTHONY!" Loki roared as his own panic overcame him as the episode lengthened. This was his first episode in a year. Arms supporting his lovers form as they both slid down on their knees, Loki noticed the moment Tony's hyperventilating breaths stop abruptly, his once pinpoint eyes now dilated and wide, as if shocked awake from a horrifying nightmare.
"Anthony?"
"Stay.."
Blinking, Loki raised his face, staring at the wide glistening eyes of his lover.
"Stay with me...please"
"What?"
Tony swallowed, a tear falling "Don't leave...I'll be stronger, or I'll stay, be a trophy wife, never get hurt again, never fight, I know I'm weak, reckless, but I'll change. What do you want? Please! Don't...you're my last chance, my only reason…don't hic*t...stay, please."
"God. I'm so pathetic. How did I come to this? What the papers wouldn't give to see the great Stark in this position." Rambling, babbling, he doesn't know what he's saying anymore. Every bottled up emotion from the very first person who left, who betrayed him, who hurt him, all of it came bursting out. He was exhausted. This is his one last try. He doesn't want to let Loki go.
Loki's eyes widened with every word he heard, his grip tightening on his lovers shoulders, roughly shaking him, jolting him from his haze.
"Anthony! Listen to me! I have a vague idea of what you're talking about but it is not what you think it is."
"Lo-"
"Do not interrupt! It is my time to talk, you wished that I could talk more, then this is it, you're getting your wish. Now just listen!" Staring in Tony's eyes, Loki waited for his lovers nod before he carried his lover to the couch to be comfortable. "It will take a long time to get my words through that thick skull of his. It's as thick as the metal on his suits" Smiling gently Loki placed his lover sideways in his lap, allowing his to tuck Tony's under his chin, with both arms around him. A moment of silence passed allowing the one to calm and the other to gather his thoughts.
"Anthony, I understand that this is my fault, partially my fault if you want, as I don't doubt you would argue with me. We are both at fault." Loki started, adjusting his hold once more when Tony settled again after trying to protest his opening spiel. "You already know of my past and my upbringing, some I have told you and some you've learned from others, but in all stories you hear, it has one similarity. I'm cold; I'm distant, silent, withdrawn. I am rarely a talker; in fact this would be my first time to talk this long. And that is my fault. I thought my actions alone would show what I feel for you and yet here we are." Tony listened, silent, fully leaning on Loki, hand clenched on his chest. He wanted to comment, he wanted to talk, refute what his lover was saying, but he needed this more, to listen.
"After all our battle in Midgard, word of my change and actions has reached back to Asgard. The newfound respect and hospitality shown by the Aesir was overwhelming, and as I've told you before, I have long longed for the acceptance of my home for many millennia…" Loki pulled back, pushing Tony so they could face one another but his lover was looking down, form trembling, holding back tears he presumes, placing a hand under his chin, he made his lover lock eyes with him. "…but no matter what honor or prestige they offer me now, it will never be enough to drag me away from you."
Tears fell. Tony was crying but this time, for the first time in a while, a long, long while, it wasn't due to pain. "I may travel through the nine realms, I may be gone for some time, and should Thor ever call upon me for aid, I shall leave immediately..." Loki cupped his cheek now, wiping the tears as they fell, smiling gently. "But I shall leave with the intention to come back to you. You never need to change. I have no desire to mold you into anything. Who you are, is you're decision to make, be it a trophy wife who stays at home or a warrior who stands by my side."
"I will not hide you Anthony." Wrapping his arms around Loki's shoulder, Tony sobbed, feeling free and light, feeling finally at peace. "After every battle or journey, there is only one place I shall go home to, and that is wherever you are. And I shall have you on my arm for worlds to see."
"You claim to be a genius Anthony, and yet you fail to see that even if all others leave, I shall stay. You have been betrayed enough, and I supposed my words hold no weight, but in time I will have you believe…" The arms tightened their hold around his waist, and Tony felt secured, shivering as he felt his heart soar. "..and this time I will do it right. I love you my Anthony."
"It still might take you a really long time... "
"It matters not, we will have all the time in the world. After all, I have no desire to go back alone."
And truly, after marriage, an apple, and a hundred years later, Loki held Tony in his arms, both content as they prepared for the magic to whisk them away to another journey through the worlds. Their destination was unknown to them but wherever they may go, as long as their together, they are home, for home is where the heart lies.
"Hey Loki, I love you."
"And I you, my Anthony."