This isn't a very original idea. I probably subconsciously took it from somewhere else, but who knows. I don't own anything, obviously.
"Tony, that was absolutely humiliating!" Pepper stomped into the Tower, leading Tony behind her. His suit was ripped and he was rubbing his jaw; she carried her shoes in one hand, gripping his sleeve in the other, her hair falling out of place.
"You saw how that guy was staring at you! He was practically drooling!" Tony shouted. "And I don't have to be dragged around. I'm not a child." He yanked his hand out of her grasp. She rolled her eyes, crossing to the freezer and pulling out a bag of frozen peas. She pressed it to his chin, pursing her lips as he sighed, leaning against the counter.
"There was no reason for you to pour a drink down that poor man's pants. He wasn't doing anything." Pepper frowned. Tony threw his hands in the air.
"He tried to beat me up!"
"After you humiliated and threatened him!"
"He was LEERING at you!"
"He was not leering. We were having a pleasant conversation." Pepper put her free hand on her hip, eyes narrowed.
Natasha padded into the kitchen, Clint on her heels. She stopped suddenly upon hearing the couple's argument; whipping around, she pushed Clint back into the hallway.
"Oh, Natasha! Clint!" Pepper called, noticing them retreating. She handed the peas to Tony, who pushed them back onto his jaw, grumbling. Natasha cursed inwardly, turning around to face them. Clint raised his hand, half waving, a sheepish smile on his face. "Maybe you can settle something for us," Pepper continued, eyeing Tony, who was rolling his eyes.
"He was leering at you and he was-"
"He was asking me about my dress!"
"That's because he wanted to find its zipper!"
Clint and Natasha shared a look. "What exactly happened?" Clint cut in. Natasha looked at the ceiling, exasperated.
"I'm not sure this is exactly our place..." she said. Pepper crossed her arms, ignoring this.
"Tony attacked some man at the party just because he was talking to me."
"He wasn't just talking! He was trying to coerce you into sleeping with him!" Tony was waving his arms. "He was trying to seduce you!"
"So you poured your drink down his pants. I see." Clint nodded, grinning.
"And he tried to beat him up. But he'd already had a few drinks himself." Pepper added, pinching the bridge of her nose.
Tony glowered at them. Natasha was staring at him calmly; Clint was chuckling, shaking his head.
Tony sighed. "Dammit. Look, Pep," he turned to Pepper, putting the peas on the counter. "I didn't like the way he was looking at you. So I wanted to teach him a lesson. It was stupid, sure, but damned if he won't think twice before harassing you again!"
"He wasn't even flirting with me! He remembered us from the last party and was asking mostly about Natasha!" Pepper exclaimed. Tony looked at her, confused.
"Natasha?" he and Clint said together.
"He remembered a Natalie Rushman having joined us before; I guess you made quite an impression." Pepper grinned at Natasha, who pursed her lips.
Tony groaned softly and ran a hand through his hair. Smiling, Pepper crossed to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. "You don't have to worry about me, Tony," she murmured. "It was stupid, but you'll always be the one I love, okay?"
Pacified, Tony put his lips by her ear. "Do you want to take this upstairs?" he muttered.
"Wait just one second. This guy asked about Natasha?" Clint looked from Pepper to Tony to Natasha herself, concerned.
Tony rolled his eyes, grabbing Pepper's hand and tugging it in the direction of the elevator. Pepper was giggling. "Talk to Red about it. We're busy." Tony said to him, grinning at Pepper.
"No, wait," Clint ran over to the couple. "What did he say about her?"
Pepper turned back to him, arm still in Tony's grasp. "I don't remember exactly. But he wanted to know if she was at the party; if she would be at the next party. He gave me his number to give to you, by the way," she tugged a slip of paper out of her purse and held it out to Natasha, who reached for it. Clint stared at her in disbelief.
"Pepper, come on!" Tony was holding the elevator door open, pleading. Pepper took a couple of steps toward him, continuing to talk to Clint over her shoulder.
"Um, he mentioned some Italian restaurant that he thought Natasha may like, apparently you've talked before?" she raised her eyebrows at Natasha, who looked tired of the whole issue.
"Was it John Rackess?" she asked Pepper, dully. Clint's eyes widened.
Pepper grinned. "That's it! Rackess, yes. That's about all he managed before Tony came over-" she trotted the rest of the way into the elevator. Tony was waiting, looking at his phone impatiently. His eyes lit up as she came over, sliding the phone back into his pocket. As Clint and Natasha watched, Tony pressed his lips against Pepper's, fumbling for the elevator button. The doors closed, leaving the two alone.
"Stark is always so dramatic," Natasha crossed to the refrigerator, taking out a bottle of water. Clint was watching her, arms crossed.
"You're not going to say anything about this?" he said. She gave him a look.
"What, the Rackess thing? There's nothing to say. He was one of the many guys who hit on me when I was undercover with Stark." She shrugged nonchalantly. Clint wasn't satisfied. His brow furrowed.
"This happens a lot?!"
"What, you thought it only happened in missions; when I want it to? C'mon Clint, you had to have known..."
"He obviously wants to ask you out! This is more than just a cat-call on the street!" He was gesturing wildly.
She looked at him, eyebrows knit, shaking her head. "There's no reason to be so jealous, Clint. You're acting like a child."
He pouted, throwing himself in an easy chair near the table. Rolling her eyes, she padded across the room and perched herself on the arm of the chair.
"You're worse than Stark sometimes, you know that?" She smirked at him. Clint looked sideways at her, half-smiling. He snaked an arm around her waist.
"I'm not the one who poured a glass of scotch down another man's pants." He was grinning now, glancing at the floor.
Natasha scoffed. "You say that like you wouldn't have done much worse." Clint chuckled, pulling her into his lap. She put her head against his chest. "I'm not going anywhere, you know." she whispered. He smiled, eyes closed.
They sat that way for a long time.