Disclaimer: This story takes place between Buffy seasons 4 and 5 and in the View Askewniverse, after Dogma. Each property belongs to their respective creators.
Jay and Silent Bob had decided to head back to the Quick Stop. It had been quite an adventure fighting those angels. Of course being Jay and Silent Bob they got lost and wound up in a strange town named Sunnydale in California. When the first walked into the town they both noticed that this was no ordinary. "I don't know about you but this place gives me the fucking creeps, I feel like we're in a fucking Scooby-Doo episode." Jay said to Silent Bob. Silent Bob nodded in approval. Suddenly they walked into a dark alley where a strange fucker was sucking a girl's neck.
"This is one wacky town." Jay said while staring at what was happening in front of them. As they got closer they heard the girl screaming for help. "What the fuck is this bitch babbling on about?" Jay asked Silent Bob. Silent Bob gestured that they should help the girl. They both ran towards them as Jay screamed "Snootch to the motherfucking nootch!" Silent Bob pulled the guy off as he and Jay beat the guy. The guy was strong though and he pushed them back. They noticed they guy had fangs and was nothing they'd seen before. "I thought Halloween was in October." Jay said as he saw the guy get closer. They tried to fight him but this guy was way too strong for them. It was like this guy had taken a super soldier serum or something. The guy managed to pin Jay down and started to suck Jay's neck. Silent Bob managed to grab the weird guy and throw him against the wall. "What the fuck is this guy's problem?" Jay asked as Silent Bob pulled him up.
The guy surprised them by standing up seemingly without harm. "Just out for a bite." The guy said as he got nearer to them. "Listen man we ain't gay. The guy started laughing as he got his fangs ready. Suddenly a girl appeared and started fighting the guy. She grabbed a stake and stabbed him in the heart. "Holy fucking shit! That fucker was a vampire!" The girl turned around to face them. "No he wasn't. By the looks of it either you're just scared or incredibly stoned judging by your appearance." Jay knew she could be right, but something in him told him this was real." Listen lady, I've fought angels and demons so don't come to me with this bullshit." As soon as he said this, she realized they should know the truth. "Fine I'll tell you the truth. That guy was a vampire, in this world vampires and demons do exist. I'm the slayer, my job is to defeat evil vampires and demons." Jay and Silent Bob stared in shock of what they had just learned. After a couple of second Jay managed to say-"By the way, I'm Jay and this is my hetero life mate Silent Bob. Who the fuck are you?" The girl replied –" I'm Buffy."