It was silly that he hadn't realized it before, it was right there the entire time and yet he just couldn't admit it to himself. He always made some excuse, usually to do with the fact he was certain Draco was up to something. That was an outright lie, and he knew it. He wasn't following Draco's every move because he was certain he was up to no good, though chances were that he was, he was doing it because no matter how hard he tried he couldn't get those grey eyes out of his head. He didn't know when it had started, he just knew that this realization had just changed everything. Now that he admitted it to himself, there was no turning back.
Harry was aware that the chances of his newly realized feelings being reciprocated were slim, but in his fantasies things always turned out alright. Draco would always say that he had been waiting years for Harry to realize what Draco had known all along. He always wanted those dreams to be real, though every time he opened his eyes just as they were about to seal it all with a kiss. A kiss…. Kissing Draco… the mere thought made him dizzy. He couldn't look at the boy anymore without his mouth going dry, and his heart starting to race, it was becoming a problem and he had to do something. He knew Draco could tell something was up with Harry recently, and he half wondered what he thought it was, part of him hoped Draco fantasized about Harry just as much as he did about Draco.
His mind slowly returned to reality as his hand froze over the Marauders Map in his lap, his fingers tracing over the delicate ink that read two simple words 'Draco Malfoy'. He was pacing around his room, he could tell by the feet moving back at forth and by the looks of it, he seemed stressed. His heart leaped, if only…. If only he could just know if this was a possibility if this could be something. He pressed his eyes closed and furiously closed the map, tossing it over to the nightstand. This was ridiculous, he was being ridiculous. He was Harry Potter for crying out loud, he defeated Voldemort multiple times, and yet he couldn't tell a boy he liked that he liked him. Taking a steadying breath, and with a new burst of courage, he pushed himself to his feet. He had to do this now before he changed his mind and before he did something stupid. He needed to get Draco alone.
Draco Malfoy was notorious for his attitude, and blatantly apparent hatred for the chosen one, and yet no one knew his secret. He never hated Harry, actually the opposite… His logic didn't make sense, but he had been keeping up the facade for so long now that he had to keep going. He realized it in the third year, realized that he was in love with Harry Potter. He was obsessed, but not for the reason people thought. For years he pushed his feelings away, holding them down with bitter resentment and letting them manifest through clever quips and digs at the boy. In reality, underneath it all every time he saw those green eyes narrowing at him behind those circle glasses a little piece of him broke. It was evident that he was doomed to be in love with a boy that would never feel the same about him.
He had distractions, things around to try and convince others and even himself that he was happy, but he was always on edge, always missing something. He knew what it was, and it wasn't something that could be acquired easily. He figured he could probably cope if they were friends, maybe that sort of relationship would be enough, but enemies? No, it was too much tension, too many lies, and it was all driving him mad.
This all ran through the blonde's brain as he paced around his small room, hands behind his back and brow deep set in concentration. This was a common position to find him in, desperately searching for some relief from this hell. Tonight was different, tonight no matter how many times he walked back and forth to his room he felt unsatisfied. He decided his best course of action was a walk around the grounds, perhaps that would clear his head of all this Potter nonsense.
He reached out an pulled on his wool coat, topping it off with a slouched green hat and scarf. It was only November, and yet the air was already taking on a bitter chill. Draco had never been fond of the cold and had yet to find a spell to correct the situation.
With a flourish, he was out of his room and walking through the dim and quiet halls. One more right-hand turn, and a small hallway he was standing in the courtyard, desperately taking deep breaths of that cold crisp air. It calmed the fire in his chest but did nothing to stop his racing thoughts.
Harry ran his fingers back through his ebony hair, causing it to stand up in a million different directions. His glasses sat hanging on the end of his nose, barely holding on, just as he was now. His face was flushed as he glanced back at the map, surprised to see Draco's name missing from his bedroom. Lurching forward he spread it out of his bed hastily, relaxing only when he saw those cursive letters outside the castle. What would he be doing out there at this time? He didn't care, he only saw it as the perfect opportunity, the perfect time to make his intentions and feelings known. Draco was alone, but not for long.
In a rush and flurry of coats and scarves, he was dressed, barely, and walking out of the room. His coat engulfed his small frame, and his scarf hung around his neck almost like an afterthought. As for the rest of him, he was sure he looked panicked, almost fidgity as the nerves raked over his body. Pausing in the hallway he chewed on his bottom lip, about to turn and head back. Something stopped him, not something, a thought, if he didn't do this now the chances were that he never would. It was now or never.
Draco calmly wandered out of the courtyard and onto the small path that looped around the castle. The air was still, but cold, causing his cheeks to turn pink and his nose to begin to run. He stuffed his hands into his pockets as his pace slowed to a comfortable walk.
Harry forged on, into the cold November air, toward Draco. After a few minutes of frantic search, he stopped, about 10 feet away from the blonde, his mouth going dry. Suddenly his entire plan, all of his ideas were just gone, what was he supposed to do. His lips parted as he stared at him, those grey eyes piercing the distance in almost a threat. There was always something hiding under there, something he could never quite put his finger on… perhaps?
Draco was lost in thought, his jaw tensed as unintentional thoughts of Harry in his Quidditch uniform engulfed his thoughts. He had long given up trying to fight his brain, it was no use and well he did enjoy the ability to do anything with the Harry inside of his head. Then he wasn't just in his head, Harry was there, standing in front of him. Hair wild, face flushed and lips parted Draco halted to a stop his breath catching. This was like a scene right out of one of his dreams. He took a few steps forward, determined to push past the boy. Rolling his eyes he stepped to the side, "Potter" he grumbled before a hand wrapped around his upper arm and jolts of electricity coursed through him. He was surprised, evident on his features as he whipped around, his feet like concrete in his shoes.
Harry knew he couldn't let Draco walk away, he needed to know. As the boy attempted to walk around him he reached out and grabbed his arm to stop him. He swallowed hard and turned so he was facing him. Opening his mouth nothing came out, and he was left looking like a bloody idiot as he starred at the gorgeous blonde in front of him. He was a perfect mix of disheveled and put together, and his hat stood out stark against his pale skin.
Finally, Harry found the words he was searching for, though they paled in comparison to his true thoughts. "Draco, I-" he started before pausing once again, "I need to know something, the truth this time," he said his voice a little more forceful and serious. "Do you actually hate me?" He asked, his voice sounding small and almost scared.
Draco was taken aback at the males question, and part of him wondered what sort of response he was looking for. Part of him wanted to bark off an insult and sulk off, but maybe this was his chance to change things. "Don't be an idiot Potter, of course, I don't hate you?" he said his voice coming off colder then he had intended.
Harry's heart leaped forward as he met the blonde's eyes, the curiosity there was enough to get him to continue. "I don't hate you either, actually, I have been thinking," he said reaching behind to rub his neck awkwardly. "I like you Draco, and not in just the regular way," he said, his eyes slanting downward. He was beyond nervous, and silence between them was deafening.
Draco felt a million different emotions pass through, but the most prominent was anger. How could he do that, walk over and tell him something like that? Was this some big joke for him, was that blasted Weasley hiding somewhere so they could make fun of him later about this. He glared at the boy, "Potter, that's not funny" he snapped rolling his eyes as he turned to walk away.
Harry paled, reaching out for his arm again, but instead grabbed his hand. How could Draco think he was joking? He wanted to scream from the rooftops about the stubbornness of his boy. "Please, please. I' not joking Draco" he said, his voice pleading with him to just give him a chance.
Draco turned, the tone of the other males voice catching him off guard. He sounded almost frantic about the whole thing, genuine. "I swear to god Potter if this is some joke I will hex you into next year" he threatened, though his gaze had taken on a soft turn. The feeling of his hand wrapped in Harry's caused his heart to flutter.
Harry laughed shaking his head, "Noted" he nodded, "But I'm not joking, I'm being serious. I really think I like you, and I can't keep pretending I don't" he admitted, his cheeks turning red and this time not from the cold. His fingers stretched out to intertwine with his pale one to pull him in. "I know we don't always get along, but give me a chance. I can change" he promised, his voice dropping to a whisper, and the distance between them steadily shrinking.
"You don't even have to ask Harry, I couldn't say no to you even if I wanted to," he said, his voice low. He closed the distance so his forehead was pressed against the other males, their height different evident now. He hadn't realized just how much shorter Harry was.
"Good" Harry whispered before he finally made his arms encircled the other boy, pulling him in. Despite the height difference he leaned up and pressed his lips to Draco's savoring every quiver of his muscles under his touch. His head spun as his hands moved to capture the boy's red cheeks.
Draco was in heaven, Harry's arms pulling him in. He thought this was the best feeling ever, that is until Harry's lips were on his and it became evident. It was now clear to Draco that he belonged to Harry Potter now and forever.