A/N: This was just a little one-shot I came up with during lunch. Wow, I come up with all my story ideas at lunch, don't I? Just a little note: this story is NOT to be taken seriously. It is pure humor, and you should enjoy it, because my other stories are going to be taking a depressing turn in later chapters. All of them.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, or anything else mentioned in this story.
Naruto had passed that same tree an hour ago, he was sure of it. Now to just see where that rockâyep, there it was, right next to the bush he had gone to the bathroom behind. What was he supposed to be doing again?
Hmm . . . . Tsunade had sent him on a mission alone, out by Orochimaru's place . . . something about Sasuke? He couldn't remember.
Naruto continued walking, his hands stuffed in his pockets. What to do know? He could keep walking until he was hopelessly lost, or he could try to find Orochimaru and get home.
'Let's go with the second one.' He thought. It was the best he had for now; might as well go with it.
"That way?" he said aloud to himself. He looked to the right and shrugged. He could see a building through the thick trees, a little. 'Maybe I'll see Sasuke. HEY! Was that what Grandma Tsunade wanted?'
The blonde headed towards the building, which was a lot closer than he had thought. He emerged in a clearing, and his eyes widened when he saw that the building was actually. . . Orochimaru's lair.
"Holy. . ." he muttered. "Oh well! I'll go see Sasuke." He walked forward, through the front door, and down the hallway.
"Hi!" he said happily to a couple passing sound ninja. The ninjas waved hesitantly, not sure what the blonde was doing there. "Do you know where Sasuke is?"
The taller ninja pointed down the corridor and Naruto sped away.
"Are you sure we should have done that?" the taller ninja asked his companion. The brunette shrugged.
Naruto passed room after room, looking for some kind of sign of which room was Sasuke's. He stopped and looked in a room whose door was open a crack. He saw a flash of a duck-butt hair style and grinned. Bingo.
"Hey, Sasuke!" Naruto said, jumping in the room. The Uchiha jumped and turned around, a kunai knife in his hands, ready to be thrown. "Woah! Dude, calm down." Naruto exclaimed.
Sasuke kept the kunai up, not trusting the blonde. "What are you doing here?" he asked.
Naruto shrugged. "Grandma Tsunade sent me on a mission, but I couldn't remember what it was. Then I was here and decided to visit."
Sasuke arched an eyebrow, the only sign of emotion on his face. "So, you just randomly decided to visit me, when you know I want to kill you?"
Naruto nodded and looked around Sasuke's room. It was rather plain, white walls, a bed, dresser. Then he turned to the other side of the room, and saw-
"HOLY CRAP! YOU HAVE A TV!" Naruto shouted very loudly. Sasuke winced and covered his ears. Yep, he really hated Naruto.
Naruto ran over to the TV in the corner of the room, and looked it over. "You have a Wii, too? Man, you got everything. If Sakura wouldn't kill me for doing it, I might just you with the old snake-bastard."
No, no, no, God, please no! Sasuke thought frantically. For once, he was actually glad that Sakura was. . .well, Sakura.
The Uchiha turned his attention back to Naruto, who was now sitting on the floor, looking through his video games. "Really, moron," Sasuke said. "haven't you learned not to touch other people's stuff without permission?"
Naruto looked up innocently, and said, "Sasuke, can I please use your games and play?"
Sasuke hadn't even opened his mouth, about to say, No, now get the hell out of my room, when Naruto turned his attention back to the games.
"Hey, hey, Sasuke, want to play this game?" Naruto held up a Call of Duty game, and Sasuke shook his head. The blonde pouted. "Fine. I'll play be myself."
Naruto made himself comfy on the Uchiha's couch, and picked up the remote control. He started the game, and logged on to Sasuke's profile, picked a difficulty, and immediately started screaming at the screen. "NO! What are you doing, Jackson? DON'T GO THERE!"
Really, he was screaming at his own person. Sasuke crossed his arms and glared at the back of the blonde's head. What did he do to deserve this torture?
. . . Never mind.
"How long are you staying?" he asked, hoping that Naruto would say that he was leaving. Or that Sasuke would wake up and realize that this was all a nightmare.
Yeah, right. Even his nightmares weren't this evil.
Naruto didn't look back at him, and continued wasting ammo on his own teammates. "I'm staying here forever! I want this kind of treatment!"
XxXxXxXxXx
"NOOO!" Sasuke screamed as he bolted upright in his bed. He searched the darkness carefully, and sighed when he realized it was just a dream. Naruto was not here, he was alone. He wiped the sweat from his face and leaned backward against his pillows.
He was just about to fall back asleep when the bathroom door opened and the Uchiha looked up to see who the hell was in his bathroom and nearly screamed again.
"'Sup Sasuke?" Naruto yawned. "Hey, can you keep it down? I was trying to sleep."
Sasuke stared at the blonde open-mouthed. And promptly ran from his room, screaming that gods hated him and was trying to teach him a lesson. He flew out the door in just his boxers and ran at record speeds back to Konoha.
When Tsunade opened her door the next morning, she saw a shivering Sasuke Uchiha on her porch, arms wrapped around his legs, mumbling about blondes and torturous gods.
A/N: So how'd ya like it? Honestly, I was laughing the whole time I was typing this. I just love the idea of Naruto visiting Sasuke randomly and torturing him so much Sasuke ran back to Konoha. Hehe. Review, please!