Dante's Furby
Written for no reason at all (other than to find a way to drop boredom) by the King of Dragons, Bahamut.
Dante is wearing a cone-shaped hat, like the birthday kids usually wear. He is sitting at the table waiting for people to come.
Dante: My birthday is finally here!! My Birthday is finally here!! ::runs around the table:: Finally here! Finally here! Finally here!!
Trish: :from up in her room: Dante! Go back to sleep!!
Dante: Why? My birthday is here!!
Trish: IT'S 3 IN THE GODDAMN MORNING!!! GET YOUR ASS UP TO YOUR ROOM AND SLEEP!!
Dante: But Triiiiiish--
Trish: Dante....I'm a very calm passionate person, and I can be very reasonable. However, I'm tired and haven't slept for 18 hours or so, thus making me very cranky...SO FOR CHRIST'S SAKE GO TO F--KIN' BED ALREADY!!!
Dante: You can't make me cause I'm the birthday boy--
A beam shoots from the ceiling, leaving a charred Dante, a snickering Alastor, Sparda and Ifrit, a 2 foot wide hole from the second floor, and a semi shattered table.
Dante: Owie......okay....
Dante goes up the stairs, with Alastor, Ifrit and Sparda floating behind him.
Alastor: hehe....nice job, stupid.
Ifrit: You pissed off Trash.
Dante: Trish.
Sparda: Trash.
Dante: TRISH.
Alastor: Trash!
Dante: Trish!!
Trish: WHAT?!
Dante: Nothing!
Ifrit: Trash...!
Dante: Trish...!
Alastor: Trash..!
Dante: Trish!
Sparda: Trish!
Dante: TRASH!!!
Another beam shoots from Trish's room, this time making a hole in the door, and once again charring Dante.
Dante:.............................................ow.
Later that morning....
Trash--uh, Trish is having her morning Coffee, Dante is drinking his Cappuchino and eating his donut, Alastor is charging up in the Battery recharger, Ifrit sits in the oven, and Sparda is watching TV. After finishing his Cap, he goes to the fridge, and chugs all the milk.
Trish: You know, we were saving that milk for your party today.
Dante: ::mouth full of milk:: Mmmph?
Trish: Of course, you COULD be nice enough to get some more milk...
Dante: Mmmmmmmmmmmm....::swallows::......nah.
Trish holds up her hand, which is now creating a small ball of energy, which is gradually growing larger.
Trish: Go.
Dante runs out the front door...
SMACK!
...but most other people find it easier to OPEN the door first.
Dante: Ow. ::Opens the front door, goes through, closes it, continues down the street to the store::
On the way, Dante runs into Jill.
Jill: Hey Dante!
Dante: Hey Jill!
Jill: Watchya doing?
Dante: Getting Milk cause I drank it all in a chug.
Jill: A WHOLE DAMN GALLON?
Dante: Uh...no, a pint less than that.
Jill: Cooooool.....by the way, have you met NEMESIS Type S?
A Trenchcoated thing falls from the sky.
Nemesis:...sttttaaaaaarsss....
Dante looks up.
Dante: Nope no, stars, just blue sky and some clouds...::realizes he's looking at Nemesis.:: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! Jill hide!!!!::dives behind a bush::
Jill: Dante, his objectives have been altered!
Dante::looks up from behind the bush:: to what?
Jill: Protect primary objective, that's me, until death. Destroy any Umbrella equipment and/or Bioweapon.
Dante: Well,::gets out from behind bushes.:: I guess he IS different.::pokes Nemesis in the arm.:: Hey, what's this guy made of? Leather?
Nemesis: Ssssstaaaarrrrrs!!:: picks up Dante and throws him 10 feet.::
Jill::smiling nervously:: uh...we still need to work most of the bugs out.
Dante::dizzy::ah...I....see......::shakes head:: Well, it was nice talking to you.:: continues walking.
Spider-man swings past and into a Telephone pole.
Spidey:....ouch.::gets off, continues swinging, and gets hit by a bus:: OW!
Dante goes to the store grabs four gallons of milk, pays and leaves.
Dante::after walking for two minutes after leaving the store, goes DT:: Must get home quick! ::trips, turns into Alastor...then he realized Alastor sitting at home:: CRAP!! ::Ducks and rolls, continues running.::
30 seconds later...
Dante::rings the doorbell.::
The door opens. Jill, Trish, Nemesis, Spidey (who is holding a large ice pack on his head), Claire, Chris, Steve, Chun-Li, Ryu, Ken, Skye Quisame, Chibi Seph, Regina, Megaman are standing under a sign that says "Happy Birthday Demon Boy".
All (minus Dante): HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
Dante goes into a frightened shock, dropping all the cartons of milk. Two minutes later, Dante wakes up.
Dante: Do NOT do THAT, again. It scares me.
Jill: Well, all the more reason they made Decaf.
Skye: 23 Years old huh? I got just the things for you!
Forty-five minutes later, Dante had opened most of his boxes.
From Jill, Chris, Steve, Claire, and Nemi:
Gold Lugers
Hunter Head
Custom Magnum
Custom Handgun
Rocket Launcher
From Trish:
Linear Launcher
Cats: The Musical DVD
Soul Reaver 2
Freedom Force
Space Quest Anthology
From Spidey:
Web Shooter
Enough Webbing to swing around all day.
Green Goblin Dart Board
From Regina:
Assault Rifle
Uzis
Electric Bayonet
From Chun-Li, Ryu, and Ken:
Baldur's Gate Collection
Miss Congeniality
Legally Blonde
Rifts: Game Master's Guide
Vampire: Guide to the Sabbat
From Skye:
Diablo
Diablo: Hellfire
Diablo II
Diablo: Lord of Destruction
Neverwinter Nights
City of Heroes
Half-Life
Half-Life: Opposing Force
Half-Life: Blue Shift
Half-Life: Decay
Pool of Radiance: Ruins of Myth Drannor
Their are now 2 presants left, both from Skye. Dante opens the larger one and pulls out....a rotting head.
Dante: :holding it up by the remaining beard.:: What the hell is this?....what the hell WAS this?
Skye: Oh, that? That's Usama bin Laden's head. I thought after I sliced his head off you could pin it on your wall. He was starting to decay as he
Dante: :poking the face, watching as the eye then pops out:: Sure. ::puts it on wall, nails it into the wall:: There.
Dante opens the last present It's a.................................Furby.
Dante:..........What the....?
Skye: It'z a Furby!!
Dante: ahhh...
Dante foolishly turns it on.
Furby: :makes weird motions, yawns.:: ::does a wake-up noise:: Me, Neeku. Me luv you.
Dante:....................Skye, this is so cool!
Spidey: For the first three minutes. Then you just want to get rid of it.
Skye smashes Spidey into a wall.
Dante::continues to mess with Furby's controls. Everyone else goes to Kitchen for some of that Vanilla Cake Trish made.:: Hehe....fun Furby.::presses a button.::
Furby: Me, Neeku. Me not like you anymore.
Dante: Hehehe....cool.
Furby: Me, Neeku. Me going to killl yooouuu.
Dante: Hmm...I didn't press anything that time.
Furby: I SAID I WILL KILL YOU , SON OF SPARDA, SHOULD WE EVER MEET AGAIN!!!
Dante: Mundus....?
Mundus the Furby: YES. I AM JUST USING THIS AS A VESSEL UNTIL I CAN FIND A WAY TO CONVERT MYSELF BACK TO NORMAL, BUT FIRST I'LL JUST DESTROY YOU TO USE YOUR BODY AS A HOST.
Dante:....Ha! How on earth do you plan to do that noW?
Mundus grows a pair of razor wings.
Dante:...oh. That'll get it done. ::screams::
Everyone comes rushing in.
Skye: Dante what's wrong?!
Dante::cowering in a corner. the Furby is on the couch, just sitting there.:: The Furby tried to kill me, saying that he was the soul of Mundus inhabiting the Furby, saying that he was going to off me before he uses my body to become whole again and attempt to take over the world again most likely succeeding this time and it scared the hell outta me Skye!!
Alastor: Yeeeeeeaaaaah........and were you at this time SOBER?
Ifrit: Yeah, he's lost it.
Skye slaps them both.
Skye: Dante, I know the Furby is a new thing to you, but you can't just hate it because you thought it spoke to you.
Everyone leaves, leaving Dante and Furby Mundus alone
Mundus the Furby: HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEE.........
Dante: Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!
TO BE CONTINUED....
Written for no reason at all (other than to find a way to drop boredom) by the King of Dragons, Bahamut.
Dante is wearing a cone-shaped hat, like the birthday kids usually wear. He is sitting at the table waiting for people to come.
Dante: My birthday is finally here!! My Birthday is finally here!! ::runs around the table:: Finally here! Finally here! Finally here!!
Trish: :from up in her room: Dante! Go back to sleep!!
Dante: Why? My birthday is here!!
Trish: IT'S 3 IN THE GODDAMN MORNING!!! GET YOUR ASS UP TO YOUR ROOM AND SLEEP!!
Dante: But Triiiiiish--
Trish: Dante....I'm a very calm passionate person, and I can be very reasonable. However, I'm tired and haven't slept for 18 hours or so, thus making me very cranky...SO FOR CHRIST'S SAKE GO TO F--KIN' BED ALREADY!!!
Dante: You can't make me cause I'm the birthday boy--
A beam shoots from the ceiling, leaving a charred Dante, a snickering Alastor, Sparda and Ifrit, a 2 foot wide hole from the second floor, and a semi shattered table.
Dante: Owie......okay....
Dante goes up the stairs, with Alastor, Ifrit and Sparda floating behind him.
Alastor: hehe....nice job, stupid.
Ifrit: You pissed off Trash.
Dante: Trish.
Sparda: Trash.
Dante: TRISH.
Alastor: Trash!
Dante: Trish!!
Trish: WHAT?!
Dante: Nothing!
Ifrit: Trash...!
Dante: Trish...!
Alastor: Trash..!
Dante: Trish!
Sparda: Trish!
Dante: TRASH!!!
Another beam shoots from Trish's room, this time making a hole in the door, and once again charring Dante.
Dante:.............................................ow.
Later that morning....
Trash--uh, Trish is having her morning Coffee, Dante is drinking his Cappuchino and eating his donut, Alastor is charging up in the Battery recharger, Ifrit sits in the oven, and Sparda is watching TV. After finishing his Cap, he goes to the fridge, and chugs all the milk.
Trish: You know, we were saving that milk for your party today.
Dante: ::mouth full of milk:: Mmmph?
Trish: Of course, you COULD be nice enough to get some more milk...
Dante: Mmmmmmmmmmmm....::swallows::......nah.
Trish holds up her hand, which is now creating a small ball of energy, which is gradually growing larger.
Trish: Go.
Dante runs out the front door...
SMACK!
...but most other people find it easier to OPEN the door first.
Dante: Ow. ::Opens the front door, goes through, closes it, continues down the street to the store::
On the way, Dante runs into Jill.
Jill: Hey Dante!
Dante: Hey Jill!
Jill: Watchya doing?
Dante: Getting Milk cause I drank it all in a chug.
Jill: A WHOLE DAMN GALLON?
Dante: Uh...no, a pint less than that.
Jill: Cooooool.....by the way, have you met NEMESIS Type S?
A Trenchcoated thing falls from the sky.
Nemesis:...sttttaaaaaarsss....
Dante looks up.
Dante: Nope no, stars, just blue sky and some clouds...::realizes he's looking at Nemesis.:: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! Jill hide!!!!::dives behind a bush::
Jill: Dante, his objectives have been altered!
Dante::looks up from behind the bush:: to what?
Jill: Protect primary objective, that's me, until death. Destroy any Umbrella equipment and/or Bioweapon.
Dante: Well,::gets out from behind bushes.:: I guess he IS different.::pokes Nemesis in the arm.:: Hey, what's this guy made of? Leather?
Nemesis: Ssssstaaaarrrrrs!!:: picks up Dante and throws him 10 feet.::
Jill::smiling nervously:: uh...we still need to work most of the bugs out.
Dante::dizzy::ah...I....see......::shakes head:: Well, it was nice talking to you.:: continues walking.
Spider-man swings past and into a Telephone pole.
Spidey:....ouch.::gets off, continues swinging, and gets hit by a bus:: OW!
Dante goes to the store grabs four gallons of milk, pays and leaves.
Dante::after walking for two minutes after leaving the store, goes DT:: Must get home quick! ::trips, turns into Alastor...then he realized Alastor sitting at home:: CRAP!! ::Ducks and rolls, continues running.::
30 seconds later...
Dante::rings the doorbell.::
The door opens. Jill, Trish, Nemesis, Spidey (who is holding a large ice pack on his head), Claire, Chris, Steve, Chun-Li, Ryu, Ken, Skye Quisame, Chibi Seph, Regina, Megaman are standing under a sign that says "Happy Birthday Demon Boy".
All (minus Dante): HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
Dante goes into a frightened shock, dropping all the cartons of milk. Two minutes later, Dante wakes up.
Dante: Do NOT do THAT, again. It scares me.
Jill: Well, all the more reason they made Decaf.
Skye: 23 Years old huh? I got just the things for you!
Forty-five minutes later, Dante had opened most of his boxes.
From Jill, Chris, Steve, Claire, and Nemi:
Gold Lugers
Hunter Head
Custom Magnum
Custom Handgun
Rocket Launcher
From Trish:
Linear Launcher
Cats: The Musical DVD
Soul Reaver 2
Freedom Force
Space Quest Anthology
From Spidey:
Web Shooter
Enough Webbing to swing around all day.
Green Goblin Dart Board
From Regina:
Assault Rifle
Uzis
Electric Bayonet
From Chun-Li, Ryu, and Ken:
Baldur's Gate Collection
Miss Congeniality
Legally Blonde
Rifts: Game Master's Guide
Vampire: Guide to the Sabbat
From Skye:
Diablo
Diablo: Hellfire
Diablo II
Diablo: Lord of Destruction
Neverwinter Nights
City of Heroes
Half-Life
Half-Life: Opposing Force
Half-Life: Blue Shift
Half-Life: Decay
Pool of Radiance: Ruins of Myth Drannor
Their are now 2 presants left, both from Skye. Dante opens the larger one and pulls out....a rotting head.
Dante: :holding it up by the remaining beard.:: What the hell is this?....what the hell WAS this?
Skye: Oh, that? That's Usama bin Laden's head. I thought after I sliced his head off you could pin it on your wall. He was starting to decay as he
Dante: :poking the face, watching as the eye then pops out:: Sure. ::puts it on wall, nails it into the wall:: There.
Dante opens the last present It's a.................................Furby.
Dante:..........What the....?
Skye: It'z a Furby!!
Dante: ahhh...
Dante foolishly turns it on.
Furby: :makes weird motions, yawns.:: ::does a wake-up noise:: Me, Neeku. Me luv you.
Dante:....................Skye, this is so cool!
Spidey: For the first three minutes. Then you just want to get rid of it.
Skye smashes Spidey into a wall.
Dante::continues to mess with Furby's controls. Everyone else goes to Kitchen for some of that Vanilla Cake Trish made.:: Hehe....fun Furby.::presses a button.::
Furby: Me, Neeku. Me not like you anymore.
Dante: Hehehe....cool.
Furby: Me, Neeku. Me going to killl yooouuu.
Dante: Hmm...I didn't press anything that time.
Furby: I SAID I WILL KILL YOU , SON OF SPARDA, SHOULD WE EVER MEET AGAIN!!!
Dante: Mundus....?
Mundus the Furby: YES. I AM JUST USING THIS AS A VESSEL UNTIL I CAN FIND A WAY TO CONVERT MYSELF BACK TO NORMAL, BUT FIRST I'LL JUST DESTROY YOU TO USE YOUR BODY AS A HOST.
Dante:....Ha! How on earth do you plan to do that noW?
Mundus grows a pair of razor wings.
Dante:...oh. That'll get it done. ::screams::
Everyone comes rushing in.
Skye: Dante what's wrong?!
Dante::cowering in a corner. the Furby is on the couch, just sitting there.:: The Furby tried to kill me, saying that he was the soul of Mundus inhabiting the Furby, saying that he was going to off me before he uses my body to become whole again and attempt to take over the world again most likely succeeding this time and it scared the hell outta me Skye!!
Alastor: Yeeeeeeaaaaah........and were you at this time SOBER?
Ifrit: Yeah, he's lost it.
Skye slaps them both.
Skye: Dante, I know the Furby is a new thing to you, but you can't just hate it because you thought it spoke to you.
Everyone leaves, leaving Dante and Furby Mundus alone
Mundus the Furby: HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEE.........
Dante: Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!
TO BE CONTINUED....