Disclaimer: I don't own the writes to any of these characters and even some of the plot line. I'm just a fan writing a story the way I sometimes see it.
Note: This is my first Hunger Games fanfiction (hooray) and I tried to keep Peeta as close to the book character Peeta as possible. I will warn, if you haven't completed the series then you shouldn't read this. The events below take place after Mockingjay. I hope you enjoy and drop me some quick reviews. I want to know how I did ;)
I watched Katniss from afar. We had been married for quite a few years now and we still woke each other with our screams. The past two nights had been particularly difficult for the both of them. There had been talk of children, mostly from myself. I loved Katniss hopelessly and dreamed of having a family with her. After everything he wasn't surprised when she met him with anger on the topic. As much as he loved her this was something he would not let go.
Seeing a broken version of the woman he loved every day broke his heart. He would find himself sketching pictures of a happy life, a life he imagined they could have had had they not been the tributes that started the fire that brought a victorious rebellion. He knew the chances of that future were slim to none but he put these pictures together. The Katniss he created was happier than the one he married. He loved them both the same, though. Still he wanted children.
Having a child with Katniss meant that he could see the life he once was in her eyes in that child's. He could see the smile that never seemed to adorn Katniss's lips anymore. They were dead souls inside, broken by the war and the Games. They were forced to make terrible decisions that people their age shouldn't have made. For it they paid greatly.
Aside from seeing a side of Katniss he longed deeply for it was just the unconditional love that children gave. They would love him regardless of his past, regardless of the stories they would hear at school because they would know them only as Mom and Dad. They wouldn't believe Katniss and himself capable of such tales. That's all they would be to them until they were old enough to see the reality in the history books. But by that point he would be dead, Katniss too. He wanted someone who wouldn't judge him or applaud his presence. Even back in District 12 life was different with those who returned.
Katniss tapped me on the shoulder to let me know she was ready to go into town and pick up supplies for dinner. Usually she would go hunting alone but sometimes she felt so tired and panicked that the idea was exhausting alone. In fact, I couldn't remember the last time she went hunting. It had to have been something like three weeks. He nodded his head silently at her. Katniss' hair was falling freeling over her shoulders. She never wore it in a braid anymore because it reminded her of her mother, of Prim. She distanced herself from those memories and I made no move to disrupt it. Just as I didn't interrupt her scribbles in that notebook she kept of peoples' good deeds.
They swayed to and fro as they walked through the beat-up city. It was coming together at last, District 12 was, but it never felt quite the same. It was easier to walk the streets and pass the meadow, aware that it was practically a gravesite. Katniss would sometimes pick the dandelions and then bury them in their backyard as she sang her sad songs of Prim. I kept a bush for her to commemorate Primrose but Katniss always wanted to do something to remember her each day. I didn't interrupt these things either, as I loved her and respected her behaviors. It didn't hurt anyone anyway.
Katniss handed their basket to me before asking to step aside just a moment. She sometimes did this if she needed to cry. It was a rather routine cycle when they came into town. Sometimes people would ask me when I was alone how I managed to live with Katniss as morbid as she was. I loved his life, though, and could never see what they meant. A strange and unconventional life with her was better than no life at all. And, I reminded myself that she did love my back. She chose me over Gale when I believed she had no reason to.
"Peeta." She appeared from behind a building with a small brown bag in her hand. It rattled as she approached me and I found myself searching for the tears on her cheeks. There were none today which gave me an uplifted feeling. She wasn't smiling but I didn't get distracted by it.
"What's up?" She tossed the bag into the basket from a few feet away but then took it from my hands when she was back in my arms. I kept glancing down at her in an attempt to read her expressions. I knew every one of them now and the one she sported now was one of mixed emotion. She appeared to be happy about something, which was positively refreshing. However, there was a fearful twinkle in the corners of her eyes that reminded me of the Games. I felt a roll in my gut that I got whenever the Games crossed my mind.
Katniss didn't answer me right away. In fact, it had to have been nearly an hour gone by when we stopped in the alley that sparked a fond memory. It was the same alley his childhood home had been located on, there was a new shop there now housing some sort of sweet tarts business. She sauntered to a place that mixed with flashbacks. A young Katniss tearing up and thin, watching me throw burnt bread to the streets, burnt bread for her to survive on. Then I came back and saw rubbing the front of her shirt flat. A flash of young Katniss shoved the hot bread into her soaked shirt and me closing the door. Then it was Katniss running her right hand through her wavy locks, pulling them sideways over her shoulder. I waited for her to say something for a long time. I didn't know what to expect. Eventually I convinced myself that it was the worst.
"Peeta, I have some news. I guess it could be considered good news. I mean, rightfully it is good news. It's good news." The tone of her voice was strong but unsure. Katniss was unsure of most things though and I couldn't yet guess what she would be talking about. I stepped closed to her and watched her expressions again but her hands were shaking and moving all over the place. I found myself instead staring at her waist instead of her face. Those fingers of hers kept wandering back to her stomach. I began to worry she was ill, but that wouldn't be good news. Of course, that's when I realized what she was about to say. I was grinning from ear to ear before she said the words.
"You're going to be a dad after all." With the weight of the news off her chest she seemed to feel at ease and able to speak more openly about it. I was already over by her spinning her in slow circles. She had been fighting me on it so hard and so fiercely. Katniss revealed she was nearly two months along. The fights they had seemed pathetic now to me. I felt horrid for pushing her so hard. She could see it in my eyes, the guilt.
"You couldn't have known. I was just going crazy, I can't sleep and I just wasn't thinking." I didn't let it put a damper on my mood though. I swept Katniss in for a loving kiss, the perfect end to what turned out to be a perfect day. Hand in hand we walked home, chatting about what we were going to do now. Katniss, though, assured me that when the time came I would be perfect as always.
"I'm not the only one. You have an effect on people, remember?"