The Letters She Wrote

Letter One - Love, Your Daughter

Gibbs

Dearest Gibbs,

They say that the first time you ever do something is when it is the hardest. Time and time again in my life this has proven oh so true for me. Today is no different. As I sit here and look at this piece of paper, I wonder what I could say to you to make things better. But, then I realize that is something I have no chance of doing. I cannot fix this, I cannot go back in time and change the outcome. As much as I wish I could, it's not possible. What I can do though is give you and everyone else what I owe you. An explanation.

I know that I vanished, without a trace. I am aware that everyone is losing their minds trying to find someone that they will never find if I can help it. Just know this, it was necessary. It was what had to be done. I know what you must be thinking, that I left again because of myself. Well, that is not true. I left you all because of an inevitable danger coming back would put each and every one of you in. At the crime scene, I was taken by someone... and he did something to me. Something irreversible, something almost no one would believe.

I cannot exactly explain in full detail, and I am sorry for that. Just know I have to keep you out of the hole, okay? Or, loop. Yes, loop. I have to keep you out of the loop. If you knew... one of two things would happen. 1. You would think I was insane, and wish to have me tracked down and committed. or 2. You would believe it and try to locate and kill who did this to me. However I can assure you that neither are good ideas, though the latter would be far worse.

You and I have been through so much together over the years Gibbs, and I am not about to be the cause of any more suffering that I already have. Just know that I love you and I will always love you, for eternity. You were the only true father I had after my mother passed away and I just hope that you can mourn me, and move on. It will not be easy, but nothing is impossible when it comes to Leroy Jethro Gibbs. I want to say more, but I am not so sure as to what I should say.

I mean, I could tell you that I am safe. I am not hurt. I have a nice home, and plenty of sustenance. I have people here who are not the worst company in the world. Just... please, Gibbs. Do not hate me. And, also... do not try to save me. Try to be happy, and live the rest of your life to its fullest. And do not let Tony push your strings.

Love,

Your Daughter, Ziva David