A/N: Damnit. This was probably the biggest fail I have ever written for many reasons. First off, it was supposed to be a different pairing for an entirely different fandom! It started out as Itacest (North Italy/ South Italy, Hetalia: Axis Powers) and then... I dunno. I'm going to HAVE to do an Itacest version of this. Second of all, it ended up being way too much like my GerIta fic, Promise of Love. Third, it was supposed to be 1,000 words at the most, but I exceeded that by 122. That's right, 1,122. In fact, this was originally going to be a drabble! And on top of all that, it was supposed to be a lemon, or at the very least a lime. An Itacest lemon (or lime). God. Damn. It.

But I stayed up until 3:30 in the morning on my birthday (July 6th) to write this fail, and I'll be damned if I'm not gonna post it.

Oh yeah... I'm also incredibly sorry to the fans of Honey's American Girl that it's been so long... I've been having huge writer's block, and now that my writing's improved (somewhat) I'm incredibly ashamed of it. But I have been working on the next chapter. I'm forcing it out for you guys. This story is to keep my head in the Ouran fandom. Please don't hate me.

Warnings: Slash, yaoi, BL, incest, twincest, Hitachiincest, kissing, angst, tears, swearing, OOCness, and the fact that THIS IS A FAIL. Peoplez, I made this T rated for a reason.

Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran High School Host Club or its nouns (people places and things). Neither do I own anything else I mentioned or will mention in these author's notes.

Music: While writing this I listened to My Chemical Romance's second album, Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, on repeat. I suggest you take the angstiest songs from there and listen to 'em. Or just listen to the whole damn CD. I don't give a crap.

LET THE FAIL BEGIN!!!

Oh God.

Oh God.

He hated how he felt. How he made him feel.

For God's sakes, this wasn't right! It wasn't natural! It was just. Plain. Wrong.

... So why did it feel so right?

He shook his head. This broke nearly every taboo possible. Not only was this another male, but they were related. Even worse, brothers. Twins.

And if his twin knew how he felt...

Oh God.

He had the worst headache. Was this his punishment? It had to be. Or maybe his punishment was a thousand times worse.

He came to dread those daily meetings, where he was only supposed to be pretending to blush at how utterly irresistible his twin was. Where his heart would race whenever he was in Hikaru's arms, and he hoped to the God that seemed to have abandoned him that the object of his affection wouldn't take it the wrong way.

Or perhaps, it was the right way?

Oh God, he felt sick. Sick and confused and pained. He was truly disgusted with himself and just wished with all his heart that he could just fucking die already.

Maybe he had already died. This certainly felt like Hell. And that must be where he was headed with the way he was going.

When did it change? When had he made the transition from acting to really, truly in love?

That was it. It wasn't just some crazy little crush, or a misinterpretation of his feelings. He was in love.

From what he heard, love was a beautiful experience. But for him, it was a nightmare. His love was sick, deplorable. But he wanted it. He wanted his twin more than he'd ever wanted anything, and in a different way than he'd ever wanted anything.

Dear God, he wanted him so much. So much it hurt. But he knew how wrong it was to feel like this. He just couldn't help it.

I want him, he thought miserably. I want him so bad that it hurts. And I can't do anything about it. What would Hikaru think?

Suddenly, images flashed through his head.

His twin yelling at him, hurting him, hating him. His twin telling everyone and laughing at him.

He never felt more alone.

And just like that, he let the tears fall. He sobbed quietly, feeling the pain of unrequited love. He felt like his heart was on fire.

"Kaoru?" His twin asked quietly, worriedly. Kaoru had forgotten that his other half was sitting on the bed next to him.

No matter what, he couldn't let Hikaru know why he was crying.

"Kaoru, what's the matter?" Hikaru seemed desperate. Why?

"N-nothing," he mumbled, trying to wipe away his tears.

"You know that I know you're lying," Hikaru said. "Why are you lying to me? What could you want to hide from me, and why?"

Everything, he thought.

Hikaru grabbed his shoulders and yelled, "Kaoru, you've been acting so different lately. What's wrong? Is it something I did? Please, just tell me!" Tears threatened to spill from Hikaru's eyes as well.

"I-I told you, it's n-nothing!" Kaoru stammered. "Please, just let me be!"

The hands on his shoulders, identical to his own, shook. Slowly, almost agonizingly so, they slid down his arms and into their matches. Two identical pairs of hands were lifted to two identical faces. Kaoru avoided the beautiful eyes that he just knew would make him melt and reveal everything he tried so desperately to hide.

"Kaoru," his love whispered, "Do... do you hate me?"

His eyes snapped up to glistening golden orbs, and before he could stop himself, he whispered, "N-no, never! I-" He cut off and looked away, just narrowly missing telling his deepest secret to the one that he was trying so hard to keep it from.

But Hikaru heard him. "You what?" he asked, almost inaudibly, as if he didn't dare take a breath.

"I... I could never hate you, even if I tried," Kaoru said. It was, of course, the truth, but not what he had originally intended to say.

"Then... Why, Kaoru? Why have you been avoiding me, and why won't you tell me what's going on with you? It feels like you're leaving me behind, and... and it hurts! You won't even talk to me anymore!" The tears started to drip from Hikaru's eyes, coating his cheeks. "W-why? What's happened to us, Kaoru?"

Kaoru shook his head, unable to form words. He was hurting his twin, his love... And that knowledge was hurting him.

But he had to hurt his other half more. And it would feel like a thousand needles piercing his heart.

"Maybe... Maybe it's for the best," he mumbled.

Hikaru's eyes widened. "W-what do you mean?"

"Maybe we should... go our separate ways. You're better off without me holding you back anyways."

"N-NO!" Hikaru pleaded "Please, no!"

Kaoru felt so damn hollow... His vision was blurry, his face was wet, and his mouth was dry. He felt ill.

He was nearly hyperventilating, his breaths coming in shallow gasps. This was so hard... so hard...

"K-Kaoru," his twin begged, "n-no! Please, don't say that! I-I need you! Please!"

He felt so terrible. He just wanted to die.

"I-I have to leave," he mumbled. It was the only way to keep the last shreds of his sanity.

As he got up, he felt a hand enclose his wrist, keeping him rooted to the spot. The hand pulled him down into his brother's lap and held him there.

"Let me g-" He was cut off by a pair of lips desperately descending upon his own.

After a second's hesitation, he kissed back with all his heart. His hands tangled themselves in his twin's hair, while an identical pair pressed themselves into the small of his back, both actions bringing the brothers closer to each other and deepening their kiss. Their tongues got added into the mix, and a few minutes later the two boys were gasping for air.

"I love you," Hikaru said as soon as he caught his breath. "I love you more than anyone or anything in this world. I need you, Kaoru. I love you."

Kaoru's eyes were swimming with tears again. But this time it was because he was so damn happy... Hikaru loved him back!

"Hikaru, I love you too," he answered, still panting a bit. "I have for a long time. But I was sure you wouldn't feel the same way, and that's why I've been so distant and why I was crying. It's because I love you so damn much that sometimes it hurts. And I'll never stop loving you."

Their lips met again in another passionate embrace, and they reached a silent agreement.

Forever.

One last note from the Author:

Yeah. Not as I planned. I need reviews to tell me how I can or can't improve. This is the second Hitachiincest I've ever written, first I posted on this site. The other one's on Mibba. I'll post it if anyone wants me to... But I won't know if you want me to if you don't press that pretty little button down there. Also, I may do a second chapter that's more Hikaru's-thoughts-centric. Just like in Promise of Love how I added Germany's POV because people wanted it. And you know how I knew they wanted it? ... That's right. THEY REVIEWED. 'Nuff said.

Oh, and flames will be used to roast marshmallows. Constructive criticism will be hung in a museum of art~! *not really*

Thank you for putting up with my fail-ness.