SASODEI!! April fools.
"Iiitttaaaaaccccccchhhhhhhiiiiiiii!!" Deidara glomped the furious Uchiha, pinning his arms to his chest. "I got you a present!!" Deidara announced, pulling away from the angered Uchiha, too hyper and excited to care of the possible consequences after. The blond presented Itachi with a black box with a red ribbon tied around it. He raised his eyebrows, and tapped it cautiously.
"This isn't one of your exploding bombs is it Deidara?"
"Nope un! It's especially for you un!" Deidara's grin grew as Itachi opened the box. Deidara jumped back mischievously, his arms swaying behind him. Itachi inspected the object inside the box, a small eye shaped ball, painted red, with Itachi's sharingan painted on it.
"Ummm-"
"KATSU!" The eyeball blew up in Itachi's face, drowning him in ash. Deidara watched the explosion in awe for a moment, then laughed till his stomach hurt, but quickly remembering who he had just angered, ran off to safety down stairs.
"…Yeah so they should be done by – What is it Brat?" Sasori, who was walking into the kitchen for lunch, stopped mid sentence, turning to the blonde hyper-ball who was jumping up and down, with an unbelievably serious face.
"Danna un!"
"What the hell is it!" Sasori shouted, trying to scare the blonde. He failed, as the hyperactive teen was still jumping up and down on the spot.
"Your puppets are on fire un!"
"WHAT?!" Sasori's eyes widened as wide as they dared to go, and ran straight up the stairs, Deidara close at this heels. Once reaching their room, Sasori's face grew serious and deadly. "Brrraaaattt!" He shouted, his fist shaking at his side. He turned to the blonde who was laughing hysterically against the wall.
"Gotcha un!" Sasori's fingers wiggled, debating on capturing and killing Deidara there, but before he could think of it any further, the blonde had run away.
I'll kill him in his sleep, see what he thinks about that for a joke! Sasori thought.
Deidara skipped lunch, running to the safety of his bedroom. April fools was fun! Who next? He pulled out a list of all the Akatsuki members (excluding himself) and checked off Itachi and Sasori.
"Konan and Tobi next un!" Deidara grinned and grabbed some newly bought green hair dye. Quietly making his way to Konan's own bathroom, he poured all of her blue hair dye down the toilet (A/N: I dunno whether Konan dye's her hair – but lets just say she does ;) ) and replaced it carefully with green. Giggling, he flushed the blue hair dye away, and cleaned away his mess.
Biting his lip, Deidara wandered what to do with Tobi. It was about twelve, so…
"He'll be napping un!" Deidara grinned and made his way into Tobi's room, quietly opening his door. He looked around his room for anything he could use. Targeting a marker pen on his desk, Deidara picked it up, and walked over to Tobi's bed, which Tobi was fast asleep on, and conveniently, sleeping on his back. Deidara grinned, and drew a fat F in the top middle of the mask, followed by a lady's anime eye on the left, and a wolf grin where his mouth should be. Barely managing to hold in his laugh, he put the marker pen back where he found it, and snuck back out of Tobi's room, bursting into laughter once reaching his room. Checking off Konan and Tobi, he looked at who was next. Hidan.
Deidara was amazed how conveniently the day was laid out for him. He caught Tobi sleeping, and now Hidan was napping on the couch! Deidara's fingers tightened around the superglue tube in his right hand, biting his lip. He snuck up behind the couch, undid the cap of the tube, and carefully placed it in between Hidan's lips, then taping them shut. Putting the cap back on the glue, he left Hidan and went back to his room.
"Hidan done yeah" He checked off Hidan and looked for his next victim. "Kakuzu!" He put his pad back underneath his pillow, safe from harm, and rummaged through his shopping bag. The day before he had been out and bought all the things he would need for his "schemes", the green hair dye, the superglue, and….edible money. It looked exactly like real money, and Deidara had taken real care into making sure it was flawless. Grinning, he put an elastic band around the "money" and put it in Kakuzu's room, saying it was from his and Sasori's last mission. He grinned on the way out. This was playing out so well!
"Zetsu un! Damn, I better hurry!" Deidara, now realising that he had only five minutes to set up his scheme for Zetsu, ran into his room, got the tub of paint and a ladder and ran to the schizophrenic's room. Opening the door a jar, he stood on the ladder and balanced the paint on the door. Hopefully no 'one would go in but Zetsu. Once he heard the front door open and Zetsu arguing with himself, he collapsed the ladder and ran around the corner, waiting for Zetsu's reaction. He heard footsteps, a squeak, a crash, and a yell.
"DAMN YOU DEIDARA!!"
"I swear I will eat him in his sleep!!"
Deidara's stomach was beginning to hurt from laughing so much, but doing this was so fun! "Kisame next un!" The blonde whispered.
Deidara grabbed the computerised picture of Itachi and giggled before holding it close to his chest. It was a picture of Itachi, only Deidara had drawn make-up on him, and put a big speech bubble saying "I love you fishy-kins" on it. He cautiously made his way up the corridor, almost bumping into Konan (Her hair wasn't green yet, so he giggled at the fact that it soon would be). Once reaching Kisame's room, he folded up the paper one more time and shoved it under Kisame's door. Deidara's eyes widened as he heard the paper being picked up. "What if it's Itachi un!" He thought.
"DEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDDDAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRAAAAAAAA!!" Kisame yelled.
"N-Not Itachi un!" Deidara stumbled back and legged it down the corridor and into the basement. He hid in there until he heard the call for dinner.
"Yum! Ramen un!"
"No Brat, we're going on a mission" Sasori's tone was sliiightly too nice. Deidara didn't notice this.
"What un! I haven't had dinner" The blonde complained.
"I don't care, you should have snacked or something. We're leaving. Now"
"But you shout at me when I snack saying I'll get fat Danna uuuunn" Deidara pouted and went to get his clay from his room.
"Now Brat!" He heard Sasori yell.
"Alright Alright un!" Deidara stuffed what he had in his pockets, and ran down the stairs, his cloak trailing behind. "Ready un!"
"Good. Move"
"Yeah Danna un" Deidara made his way out the door, Sasori close behind. "So what's the mission un?"
"We think there are people who know where the base is. We're all fanning out and infiltrating the area for any signs of them"
"Cool un, I'll be ready" Deidara sounded confident. Sasori noted this. Don't be too sure brat If Sasori could laugh, he would have done. But he didn't. Once reaching the beginning of the forests, Deidara took out some clay, and glanced over at Sasori, only just noticing something.
"Danna un?"
"Brat?"
"Why are you not in Hiruko?"
"Cause I don't want to be in him, I want to be in this one. Have a problem with it Brat?"
"N-No un, just asking"
"Well keep quiet, you never know when-" A kunai flew past Sasori, who was a few paces ahead of Deidara, and scraped the blondes cheek.
"Holy hell un!"
"Watch it brat! Keep your guard up"
"Will do un" Deidara nodded and focused. Where did it come from?! Sasori smirked, watching Deidara concentrate.
"Come on brat" Deidara nodded, and followed his danna cautiously further. A man came running at them. Sasori jumped out of his "armour" and 'attempted' to kick the attacker, his fingers discreatly moving. The attacker flew at Deidara, who leapt back into a tree, moulding his clay.
"Take this un!" He threw the clay at the attacker and did his hand signs. "Katsu!" Nothing happened. Sasori held in a chuckle. "What un?!" Deidara's eyes widened in horror. He tried again, running from his attacker. Nothing happened. He tried again and again, but still, nothing blew up. He stopped suddenly, eyes wide in realisation.
"I-Its…" His heart raced faster than it had ever done before.
"You're dead!" The attacker flew at Deidara. The blonde braced himself for the hit…. Nothing came. The sound of laughter filled his ears. He opened his eye, and looked around. Itachi, Pein, Konan (Who now had green hair), Kisame, Zetsu, Sasori, no Tobi though.
"What the-"
"Happy April fools you moron!" Hidan couldn't stop laughing, he had obviously gotten the superglue off his mouth, but none of them could stop laughing at him. After a few more minutes of being stunned into disbelief, they all parted and went back to the base, Sasori and Deidara remained.
"You switched my clay un– for Play-dough!!" The blonde yelled. A few birds flew off in freight.
"You joked about my puppets being on fire, and you annoyed them. We thought we'd get you back"
"That wasn't funny un!"
"Sure it wasn't Brat" Sasori shrugged and walked slowly towards Deidara. He chuckled.
"Happy April fools Dei" He placed his lips on the blondes' forehead, and turned on his heel. "I wouldn't go to sleep for a few weeks, I think Zetsu might eat you…Actually, I think all of us want to kill you"
"Not funny un" Deidara mumbled, following Sasori back to the base.
"Oh, Tobi doesn't look up to you any more. He says you betrayed him and you were very bad for drawing on his mask, so you now have….no friends" Sasori smiled.
"I have a friend un!"
"Really?"
"Yeah un" Deidara smirked.
"Who then brat?"
"You un!" Deidara ran up and jumped on the shorter mans back.
"Fine, but you're getting off as soon as the base is in sight"
"Fine with me un" Deidara tightened his arms around the red head, enjoying every smell, sight, and touch of his partner's body. He was going to savour this moment forever.
"Kay Brat, off"
"What un? How long was I asleep?"
"You weren't to my knowledge"
"But I just got on un" Deidara pouted.
"Yup, exactly"
"Daaaaannnnnnnaaaaaaaaaaa" The blonde gave the red head a final shove before sitting on the ground. "Not leaving till you carry me un"
"Then you'll be here all night" Sasori called, now walking back to the base without the blonde.
"So un!" Deidara shouted. "I'm not leaving till you carry me!!"
"I'm never going to carry you!"
"Yeah you will un!!"
…Three days and nights later…
The moon glowed against the navy blue sky, a figure appeared next to the sleeping blonde.
"Stupid brat" Sasori scooped up the blonde in his arms, and carried him bridal style back to the base. Once inside, he placed the blonde on his bed and covered him up, smiling before going back to working on his puppets.
"Told you you'd carry me un" Deidara mumbled. Sasori smirked, but Deidara didn't see. Unfortunately.