It's Over
Series: Summerland
Pairing: Bradin and Sarah
Song: It's Over by Jesse McCartney
I know this isn't my usual stuff, but I really love Summerland and always wanted to do something for it. So I decided while working on other stories to do this in between since I love Bradin and the song used is by my favorite singer who plays Bradin I thought this would be fun to make. Sorry if the songfic this isn't great, I wrote it up in three days(well two since I didn't work on this one day)
Anway, I hope you enjoy....
I picked up the bulbous frame of my acoustic guitar gingerly and strummed a few chords. It had been a month since the incident with Sarah. I still thought of her, every once in a while. Enough so that I had decided to write a song about her. A way that would help me forget her, or make her forget me I should say. It was becoming easier for me to deal with, but only a week after our break up she practically begged for me to come back. But I knew that somehow It's Over.
I hummed a few notes of the song, then began the chain of strums that were my song.
"We've run out of words we've run out of time."
My voice echoed off my walls and enveloped me in a suddenly inspiring passion.
"We've run out of reason, really why we together?"
I couldn't help but think back to countless conversations where Sarah would be begging and I'd be trying find some sort reason why I should take her back. But I couldn't find a single one.
"We both know it's over, baby, bottom line."
And in my core I knew it was true, it had to be over. It just had to be.
"It's best we don't even talk at all."
Shaking my head, I sighed. I knew that it was the best thing to do for the of us.
"Don't call me, even if I should cross your mind."
I couldn't help but scowl absentmindedly at the ceiling at this line. Of course she couldn't do me that simple favor. She wouldn't move on.
"Hard enough, I don't need to hear your voice on my messages."
Stealing a glance at my cell phone I saw another voice mail from her. Didn't she realize her attempts at getting back with me were hurting me too. I didn't hate her. I really did care, but not in the way she wanted me to.
"Let's just call it quits, it's probably better."
That much I knew had to be true. Dating someone who couldn't be honest with you, toyed with your emotions and made sanity something rare in your life wasn't worth it.
"So if I'm not returning your calls it's 'cause."
I inhaled once, before singing the chorus.
"'Cause I'm not coming back, I'm closing the door."
I was sick of this game she was playing with my heart. I wanted so badly to close the door and never back. But could I really do it?
"I used to be tripping over, missing you but I'm not anymore."
My mind drifted to the countless times I would be glancing nervously at my phone. Waiting. Waiting for her calls.
"I got the picture phone baby, you're picture's gone."
A small vibrating came from my phone. It was her. The picture was gone, but I had memorized the numbers so well I could recite them.
"Couldn't stand to see your smile every time you dialed."
It was true. I may not be in love with her, but to see that smile and imagine that very smile mangled over the phone was too much.
"'Cause it's over, girl, you know it's over this time."
She had to know. It was obvious, but I suppose in her mind she never lost.
"So when you call I'm pressing seven."
My phone buzzed again, and I finally practiced what I preached. Seven had been dialed. The screen wen back to my new background picture. My family.
"Don't wanna hear your messages, messages."
I shook my head.
"I'm tryna to erase you from my mind."
Forever.
"Cause it's over, I swear girl it's over this time.
So don't keep calling, leaving messages."
The melody seeped out of my room and wafted throughout my home.
"Don't wanna know where you been."
I didn't need to know. I didn't want to think of who she was with.
"Baby 'cause it's over."
It was over wasn't it? I was starting to truly convince myself I was doing the thing by not caving into her demands.
"I still wake up every morning quarter to ten"
The clock in front of me read 9:40. Five minutes until I performed my morning routine. No thoughts would stray during that short period of time.
"I still eat my cereal right at the kitchen table"
I didn't know why I retained this small routine. Why I didn't run, and hide in my room. Isolated from my family. Maybe it was to show some normalcy, relieve them of their worry. Well at least some of it.
"I can't even remember how long it's been "
It still amazed me how many minutes had ticked by. Hours that flew by. Days that ended forming into endless weeks. Yet within that time I had all but forgotten her.
"No trouble stayin' occupied"
That part of the pain was easiest. To numb the heartache all I needed were distractions. It was the only way to realize that it's over. To make myself see that without her I could be whole. Not half a person that she needed to complete.
"Oh they ask about you whenever I come around"
The reminders were what made life difficult. The constant reminders of her and how we weren't together. It was only me. The guy she toyed with then threw back into the corner to collect dust. It wasn't so much that I had lost the love of my life but the very fact that what we had wasn't ever really there. She hid behind her facades and lied to me.
"I do what I can not to put my business in the streets "
I did try my hardest not to have the breakup broadcasted throughout the entire city. Not to have people think I was on the rebound. Especially this one girl I really liked. She was new, pale as any girl could possibly be with odd yet appealing reddish-bronzeish hair and bright forest green eyes. I knew she'd never ask about that part of my life. She was much to shy to pry such information from me. Which only made things more complicated but that was why I needed to keep this on this on the low.
"Last thing I need's another episode"
Or a bunch of Sarah's friends swarming me, probing me, nearly attacking me over not accepting her apologies. Not a fond memory.
"Keep conversation short and sweet because "
I took another long breath, trying to get myself to make her leave my mind. Make myself see I was doing the right time by ignoring.
"'Cause I'm not comin' back I'm closing the door
I used to be trippin' over missin' you but I'm not anymore
I got the picture phone baby your picture's gone
Couldn't stand to see your smile every time you dialed
'Cause it's over
Girl you know it's over this time
So when you call I'm pressin' seven
Don't wanna hear your messages, messages
I'm tryna erase you from my mind
'Cause baby it's over
I swear girl it's over this time
So don't keep callin' leavin' messages
Don't wanna know where you been
Baby 'cause it's over"
I felt slightly empowered after releasing another chorus from my song, but it still wasn't quite enough to free me from the internal shackles that bound me.
"You know that it's over when the burnin'
And the yearnin' inside your heart ain't there anymore"
It wasn't there anymore, was it? That fiery sensation that I had at least thought was there. Burning inside my heart, wanting her. Needing her. It was gone.
"And you know that you're through when she don't do to you
And move you like the way she moved ya before"
She wasn't the same. She wouldn't, couldn't make me feel that whole feeling. Or the illusion of the feeling. Her touch didn't burn in small sparks across my skin.
It just didn't.
"And you wanna pull her close
But your heart has froze "
I did. When we were about to break up. I'd want to pull her close, run my hands through her hair. But it just wasn't possible. My heart had in a sense literally froze. All romantic feelings ceased to exist.
"You kiss her but her eyes don't close"
That true too. When I'd lean in to kiss her. There wasn't that anticipation. It was as if she'd become so accustomed to me that our kisses didn't send her stomach through various twists and turns. The way I thought true love should be.
"Then she goes out of your heart forever "
Almost as if there wasn't any space left for her anymore. That space seemed to never have existed.
"And it hurts you but you know that it's better "
It did hurt that there was not even a tiny corner of heart where she could reside. That if we both ever wanted to be happy, I'd have to move on first.
"Girl you know it's over
Girl you know it's over this time"
My eyes, suddenly widened with enlightenment. It was over. I could move on. I could leave and not relapse. Not crawl back only to have my heart broken again. It was possible to attain.
"So when you call I'm pressin' seven"
Ring-Ring. Another call from her. I smiled, but proceeded to press seven again, but with a lighter heart.
"Don't wanna hear your messages, messages"
I didn't need to hear them to know that it was over.
"I'm tryna erase you from my mind
'Cause it's over"
Dead on. I didn't need the calls to know that we were over.
"I swear girl it's over this time"
I could say it was over now with no ounce of reluctance at all. I could guarantee her that we were over.
"So don't keep callin' leavin' messages"
It would pointless for her to. I've accepted the truth.
"Don't wanna know where you been"
It wouldn't help either of us. Only hurt this long process.
I let my voice ring with utter certainty now. I was confident with my answer now. I didn't need to be indecisive.
"Baby 'cause it's over
'Cause it's over
Girl you know it's over this time
So when you call I'm pressin' seven
Don't wanna hear your messages, messages
I'm tryna erase you from my mind
'Cause it's over
I swear girl it's over this time
So don't keep callin' leavin' messages
Don't wanna know where you been
Baby 'cause it's over"
My phone rang only one more time, but with a different number. A number I had been wishing would show up on my phone. Elizabeth's, sweet, shy Elizabeth.
I picked up my phone and answered.
I was definitely over Sarah.