Disclaimer: I own nothing...BBC and RTD (bastard) own Torchwood and Burton/Danny Elfman own the rest.

A Torchwood Nightmare before Christmas:

Part One: This is Halloween

"Please, oh please, won't you tell us a story? You know so many good ones!"

The speaker was very small and had a group of similarly sized companions around him, for he was unmistakably a little boy, with a mop of dark hair, three eyes, and an eager smile; the kind of little boy that appeared on commercials for alphabet soup in the late 40th century. The addressee was quite a bit older, but mostly on the inside; he smiled the kindly and benevolent way older men did when looking at grandchildren and propped his head up on his hand.

"But what sort of story would you like to hear?"

"Adventure!"

"No, stupid, I want a love story!"

"Scary! Those are the best!"

The man chuckled and leaned closer to the gaggle of children, a mischievous smile on his handsome face. "How about one that has all of those? A story about a hero's longing for something new, a story about two vastly different holidays that met by mistake, a story where there are monsters, ghouls and witches, a pumpkin king and a rag doll who save the day and find one another?"

The children nodded excitedly and plopped down in a tight cluster.

"Will it be too scary?" asked a small girl who looked the most similar to the speaker as far as species went, her eyes wide and apprehensive.

"No, not too scary."

"And not too many kissing parts?" The three-eyed little boy asked with a frown of disgust and disapproval only little boys could achieve.

"No more than usual." The man smiled all the wider.

The children giggled excitedly before quieting down again for their storyteller. He paused and gathered his many, many thoughts together and tried to think of how to begin the story. It had once been a popular one, many years ago, and while it wasn't as well known anymore, the children would appreciate it nonetheless. Startlingly, the holidays making up the premise for the story were still being practiced in mostly their original forms in certain systems, specifically ones closest to Old Earth, so they would understand and enjoy that aspect.

However…the man was a little fuzzy on some of the details of the characters. He couldn't really be blamed…he was still very new at being very old. He could recall bits and pieces, stitches and striped suits, but nothing whole; still, he knew the story well enough. The children wouldn't know the difference if he substituted characters he couldn't picture for people he still could. A slightly bittersweet smile settled across his face as he slotted people remembered but long lost into their roles, their faces and voices still vivid in his memories…the important ones always were.

"Are we ready?" The children all nodded fervently, multi-colored and single-colored eyes bright and wide. The man nodded and clicked a few buttons on a device wrapping around his wrist, dimming the lights and lighting the small hut in orange and yellow, looking back over his hushed audience with a theatrical grin. "Long ago, longer now than it seems, in a place that perhaps exists only in your dreams…"

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"This is Halloween, this is Halloween, pumpkins scream in the dead of night…"

Ianto, unsteadily, made his way out of the building he had the misfortune of calling home, checking behind him once more to make sure he had put enough deadly nightshade in Miss Yvonne's evening tea before he opened the creaking, iron door. Outside, it was a cacophony of noise and motion that nearly made him dizzy, all the denizens of Halloween out in their very worst and creating a dazzling show for all their audience in the 'normal' world to enjoy this one night. He made sure to stay out of the way for the most part, his shaking limbs still weren't all that accustomed to long periods of movement that didn't require making coffee, soup, or tea, but his eyes took everything in.

The sky was dark and ominous, ghosts frolicking without reservation, and the entire show was terrifying, a regular parade of every monster that existed in a child's mind. To be completely honest though, Ianto was equally distracted by the cobbled, broken roads and slanted buildings as much as he was by the show. You see, he had never been allowed out much since his creation. Understandably, he had taken to poisoning his creator just to avoid the cabin fever itching underneath his stitches; but still, he never got very far before she came after him. But tonight, tonight was his very first Halloween and he made sure to put enough nightshade in her tea to ensure he enjoyed it.

Perhaps it should be explained that Ianto was, like all of his fellow townspeople in the town of Halloween, not human. No, no, he was, in fact, a cobbled together creature who had been stitched together in Halloween and had not experienced death in the same manner all other townsfolk had at one point or another. He was somewhat tall, not freakishly like many others he saw walking the streets, but enough that he considered himself so, and looked somewhat young and 'fresh,' in comparison with a town made up of various nightmares and monsters. He wore a suit, at his creator's insistence at first but he grew to enjoy them well enough, that was ripped and tattered, sometimes revealing the stitches holding him together underneath. As strange as this sounds though, he was quite handsome, stitches and all.

The parade made its way into the main circle of town square (quite an oxymoron, Ianto thought to himself in a bemused sort of way), their song getting louder and louder as it reached its crescendo. Witches flew overhead, cackling madly, a bloodied looking man in a doctor's coat twisted wicked looking knives around dangerously, ghosts swarmed around a flaming scarecrow that was horrifying and beautiful. Ianto kept himself behind a flickering, practically defunct lamp post, watching as the scarecrow twirled and whirled in a flurry of flame before it flipped into a well…he knew who that was now. It was impossible not to, even confined as he was.

Their Skeleton Jack, their Pumpkin King.

He didn't really appear skeletal enough to be a skeleton, but Ianto supposed it was more of an honorific title than literal, much like the Pumpkin King name. He did, however, appear dead and somewhat monstrous like the townspeople who admired him so. He was quite tall and gaunt, his skin a pale gray stretched tight against his bones and muscle, with a wild shag of hair that stuck up in every which way that was as dark as the sky at the moment. He was dressed in what looked like military clothing, that while a bit faded and patched, looked mostly whole, and a great jacket covered in cobwebs that made him look dreadfully menacing. Despite his ghastly appearance though, his eyes were bright, alive, and nearly glowed in the darkness surrounding him…he really looked quite dashing for a Halloween king. Ianto had never really seen him up close before…he had expected him to look a bit scarier.

The song and celebration ended in a jubilant cheer as everyone congratulated each other on another great Halloween, surrounding a smiling Jack, who was smiling a bit too wide for Ianto to believe. He felt a strange tug encircle him as he stared at their Pumpkin King, but just as he started to climb down from his post on the lamppost, a tough grip encircled his wrist and pulled him away from the rest. He rolled his eyes and cursed silently when he met Miss Yvonne's frowning, half mutilated, half metallic visage, managing to look quite dangerous despite her wheelchair.

"You ungrateful brat! Poisoning me, again, and sneaking away!"

"Let go of me." He tugged at his arm experimentally, making sure to keep his voice polite and unassuming, sighing internally when he didn't budge one bit. Well, that really only left one more option…he was going to enjoy the rest of this night if he had to do so in pieces!

"No, we are going back, and you'll be lucky if you see the outside of your room for a moon!"

"Mm, no, I'm not." He reached through a rather large tear in his suit and pulled at his stitches hard, stumbling as his right arm came off, but luckily not losing his footing. Yvonne battled his now fighting right arm, which had taken it upon itself to pound her half-metal head harshly, and he took the opportunity to take off, wobbling off balance as his still learning legs fought against the abrupt change in equilibrium.

He ran, ran as well as he could, not noticing that another was quickly trying to run away as well, but then again, he did have good reason. He was missing his arm after all. When he came to a stop, he was in one of many cemeteries surrounding the town of Halloween…still, this one was one of the nicer ones. He came to a stop at a large headstone and sat down a bit dejectedly, glancing sorrowfully at his missing arm, picking at the fall colored leaves poking out. He sighed and leaned back with an annoyed glance upward, silently asking if one night was really too much to ask for, one night for himself. He was restless, being cooped up all day and night, forbidden from the wide world because others thought he wasn't ready. How annoyingly patronizing. He gingerly removed his tattered jacket and pulled back the nearly torn sleeve of his shirt to examine his battle wound with greater interest (he wasn't exactly sure how bad it was…it was the first time he'd willingly undone his stitches), but another sound and ensuing presence in the cemetery halted him. He hurriedly ducked behind the headstone, glancing up and over when the other had walked past him a little.

To Ianto's great surprise, it was Jack, a somewhat contemplative look on his face, the moonlight bringing his pale skin into greater prominence against the dark coat. He walked past the grave of what looked like a dog house with the name Myfanwy etched into the stone, gave a pat against his leg, and out rose the ghost of a dog, a bright bulb of red for a nose. He stopped, completely oblivious of Ianto's presence and began a slightly conceited monologue that made Ianto roll his eyes and frown. Yes, it was obvious that Jack was a great terror, the best in all of Halloween even, but did he really have to go on about it?

However…the more Ianto listened, the more melancholy it sounded…the sadder he found himself becoming. Jack, their Pumpkin King, was so very tired of it all, so tired and full of longing he couldn't understand, missing something awfully important but not a clue as to what it might be. And, the more he watched, the more Ianto found that his own feelings were echoed with their Pumpkin King…and it felt all so new to him! He frowned and pushed himself, awkwardly and clumsily since he only had the one arm, but Jack was trudging, depressingly, into the forest, too far and too gone to look back. Ianto frowned deeper and gave a sad sort of sigh.

"I know how you feel, sir."

He took a deep breath and steeled himself as he made his way back to the town and the punishment he knew awaited him…but really, he did need his arm back, it was his good one that he used for just about everything. He stopped to restock on the nightshade and wolfsbane herbs he knew he would in the near future and continued back, casting one last glance over his shoulder at the gloomy forest Jack had disappeared to.

Now, while Ianto made his way back, Jack made his way forward, walking and walking and walking until the night was gone and the sun replaced her. He had not really had such a terrible Halloween night, in fact, he agreed with Martha, their lovely Mayor who had a habit of over-reacting over little things and literally turning face, that it had been their best yet. Two of the witches, lovely things named Gwen and Tosh, had effused him with praise with his performance and he couldn't deny his own part either. Even their resident Mad Doctor, Owen, had grudgingly offered how well they had all done…and still he was left with nothing but an empty pit when it was all said and done.

It was miserable, and not the good kind he usually took pleasure in causing, this barren feeling that had taken up in his chest, so much that he couldn't even stand to stay for the awards that night. And now, here he was, wandering aimlessly in a truly pathetic manner not befitting the terror-inspiring Pumpkin King…Myfanwy chirping behind him in an effort to either cheer him up or get him to play. And, eventually, when he finally looked up, deciding he had wallowed enough, he found himself someplace new.

He perked up and glanced around as he entered an oddly shaped clearing, looking even more intrigued when the large trees forming the circle were shown to have funny sort of doors on them. A heart, and a clover…an colored egg, some fowl…and something so marvelous he couldn't help but draw nearer to it, his brightly gleaming eyes staring in wonder at the colors and vibrant life the tree-shaped door had. He glanced back at Myfanwy, who looked somewhat apprehensive about the whole affair, and with a rakish grin that truly lived up to his Skeleton Jack name, opened the door…

…but nothing happened. He frowned, rubbed at his chin and glared at the open door leading to nothing but blackness, peering around after a few moments, still seeing nothing. He turned back, shrugged at Myfanwy, and started to walk to one of the other doors to see if they were any different…when a cold wind wrapped around him and tugged him down into that tree and that blackness. And he fell for what felt like ages, before finally coming to a stop on a cold mound of white, eyes going wide as bright, happy colors and sights filled his vision.

He let it all soak in, let it fill him up, and he made his way down to take a closer look, longing to know what he had found with a passion that had been long dead. Now, some may think it obvious what he found, all the red and green, the snow and elves, the toys and candies being made and baked, but to him, it wasn't. He poked and peeked around for hours, watching toys being made, gazing at little ones at play without being scared senseless, crunching the snow, for that was what the white stuff was, with pleasure. And he learned what presents were, what they were made for, and what all this was for.

Christmas town…

And he decided that he needed to share all of this, everything that amazed and excited him, with his own townsfolk so they could share in his joy. They needed to know how much, much more to their world there was than just their Halloween! And so, he set off to gather all that he learned, ignoring the little voice that said perhaps this wasn't what he was missing, this wasn't what would fix his emptiness…but then there wouldn't be much of a story, would there?

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True to his suspicions, Yvonne was not pleased when Ianto returned. Still, she had attached his arm back on, which wasn't necessary because Ianto knew how to do it himself but he let her have these little things when she was not particularly pleased with him. Saved everyone a lecture. And after yet another lecture about how he wasn't ready for so much excitement, she had left him alone, no doubt to reflect on his actions but he found himself much more concerned about Jack. He could hear the frantic worry of the townsfolk about how he had not returned that night, and how he had been missing for nearly two days, and wondered if anyone had thought to search those forests.

But, it wasn't like he could shout out his suggestion from so high up, so he wondered silently.

But then…then Jack returned late the next morning, on a very strange looking automotive, calling immediately for a town meeting that everyone should attend with a passion that had been absent the last time he had seen the Pumpkin King. Ianto watched all the excitement from his tower, knowing there'd be no chance Yvonne would even think about letting him go with her if she decided to go (not after three times of poisoning), but he felt a fire burn through him…he was going to go to that meeting and if that meant a fourth time of poisoning, so be it. He'd just have to be a bit sneakier about it.

As it turned out, that did not prove too difficult, an extra dose of nightshade and a hint of frog's breath in her afternoon soup, a straining spoon, and an unassuming attitude did the trick and the next thing he knew, he was making his way into a large, wonderfully broken down building with every other towns person, some looking at him curiously while others just rushed past him. He grinned widely and took up a spot near the back, climbing up onto a large oak branch that had broken its way inside. The various monsters and nightmares were chatting excitedly, all wondering what could possibly be so important to Jack, and then they hushed as one as he came out on stage, nodding his thanks to their mayor, who was busy arranging lights in the rafters.

"Listen, there were objects so peculiar they were not to be believed and a world unlike anything I've ever seen! And as hard as I try I can't seem to describe, but you must believe when I tell you this it's as real as you or I and it does exist…here, let me show you."

Jack pulled back the curtain and revealed a colorful display that immediately caught the attention of everyone; Ianto felt a smile stretch across his face, his stitches flexing wide to accommodate the uncharacteristic smile (he usually smirked you see). The little tree was shaped like a triangle and had pretty lights wrapped all around it and there were equally colorful boxes underneath it, as well as toys, red, large socks, and platters of what smelled like cakes. Jack paused and let the sight sink in before he continued, picking up a colorful box and showing it to his audience.

"This is a thing called a present, and the whole thing starts with a box—"

"A box? Is it steel"

"Are there locks?"

"Is it filled with a pox?"

A petite witch with slanted features and stringy, dark hair stood up and clapped her hands. "A pox? Oh, how delightful!"

Jack shook his head and frowned deeply. "No, Tosh, if you please, just a box. Wrapped with brightly colored paper and the whole thing is topped with a bow."

"A bow, oh, how ugly! But what's in it?" Another witch, taller and paler than Tosh, with a gap in between her large, fanged teeth said aloud. "What's in it?"

Jack, still frowning, held the box away from the two witches, who began to circle him on their brooms. Ianto stifled a chuckle at the sight. "That's the point of the thing, not to know."

Ianto shook his head in an amused, but not unkindly, manner as Jack continued the futile effort of trying to explain what each of the foreign things were and what Christmas was, wishing he could help in some way, but he knew it was a wasted effort. The townsfolk were just too different from this Christmas business, they kept trying to explain it in their own terms while Jack tried and tried to correct them…but eventually, he recognized the lost cause and began his usual theatrics as he told them all about the ruler of Christmasland, a 'Sandy Claws' who was huge, red, and seemed appropriately terrifying. It was a shame, because all of the Christmas things looked lovely and Jack was so very excited by them, but Ianto couldn't help but wonder why he was trying to explain these things in the first place.

True, they were different and pretty but they had no place in Halloween…Jack was the Pumpkin King; something just didn't sit right with him about this whole situation. And after all the others filtered out of the hall, Ianto stayed and wondered more and more, trying to figure out why he felt such foreboding and why Jack couldn't ignore this Christmas thing. It was all this thinking that was his undoing in the end, Yvonne eventually finding and yanking him back to the laboratory she liked to have him call home.

However, he was no longer content to sit alone and apart from the rest of the world, not after having experienced it. He felt a mild tinge of regret for the thoughts forthcoming abandonment of Yvonne he was entertaining, she had made him after all, but he could not be what she wanted him to be and he didn't want to be. In the end, it had been as easy to escape as it had been to poison her four times; all it had taken was a little determination and courage to swan dive out of the tower. He had lowered a small satchel and basket beforehand and lying on the cobblestone afterward, he had decided he had never made a better decision.

After deftly stitching his hand, arm, and two legs back to their proper place, he got to his continually wobbly feet and made his way through the dark streets until they came to a stop outside the imposing gates of what many in the town had nicknamed the 'Hub.' Strange nickname for a house, but Ianto assumed it meant something important to Jack. The uppermost tower of the rickety and leaning home was flashing a bright green as Jack sunk deeper and deeper into this Christmas business…Ianto had overheard a guest of Yvonne's say that he had gone to the Mad Doctor for experiment equipment.

To be completely honest, Ianto could not begin to explain the strange flutter and worry he felt over all this, over Jack. It was completely new, completely unknown, and completely irrational, according to what he'd been taught, but there it was festering inside him…and he really couldn't seem to come up with a good enough excuse to want to get rid of it. He glanced back down at the little basket he had made, his own special coffee brew and a few other odds and ends he figured just about anyone would like and back up at the tower, a small smile stretching across his face. He left the basket at the base of the gate and tossed a few rocks at the top window, waving, a bit shyly if truth be told, when Jack appeared, looking both frazzled and a bit paler than normal (if such a thing was possible, Ianto thought with humor).

Jack looked at Ianto in confusion, as if trying to place him, a bit of a gleam reappearing in his eyes as he smiled, if a bit unsure.

Ianto tilted his head to the side and felt a smirk cross his face before he motioned to the basket by the gate.

Jack's tired face alit with comprehension and he motioned to wait before he disappeared. Ianto, however, was still a bit unsure of what he was feeling so he didn't wait. He ducked away and peeked for only a second when he heard the gate open; Jack looked around for a moment but he shrugged and grabbed the basket and eventually headed back inside. Ianto smiled again and rested back against the stone wall…he wasn't sure what he felt but he was sure that he liked it. It filled up the empty space he'd had since he had first opened his eyes…like he had been incomplete for all this time but had finally found the way to be whole. It was all quite wonderful, if a bit frightening...but everything worthwhile in this town was.

He picked at a gray thistle and twirled it in between his fingers, watching how it blurred in the night when something very odd happened. Even by Halloween's standards. The thistle shriveled away and left a miniature Christmas tree, just like the one that had been on the stage at the meeting, complete with cheerful little lights. Ianto smiled and went to touch it with his other hands when it burst into flames, leaving nothing but a charred, skeleton behind. He stared at it, justifiably startled, and dropped the husk to the ground, watching as it collapsed to ash and blew away. He looked back to the blinking green tower, a pit of dread in his stomach, and looked into the dark sky.

He had a very bad feeling that things were about to spin wildly out of control…

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