Rating: PG
Summary: This is another 'last show' fanfiction. Part of it comes from a spoiler that's been posted on the internet for the finale, some of it is an homage to all of those fanfic writers who have been putting out convincing fics for the past year or so about how Voyager will end. My humble thanks -- I hope you enjoy this...
Warning: Contains spoilers for "Workforce I & II" and "Natural Law"
Author's Note: Many many thanks to my best friend, McMorsel, who helped work out the intricacies of this over the course of a beautiful San Francisco Bay Area afternoon.
Copyright March 2001 Cassatt
In the End
23 Years after the U.S.S. Voyager returns to the Alpha Quadrant: Earth
If Tuvok could have felt fear he would be afraid. If he could have felt anger, he'd be furious. If he could have felt betrayal, he'd be hurt. No one in Starfleet Command believed him, no one listened to him for longer than five minutes at a time as he was escorted from one Admiral to another, finally taken to the Chief Psychiatrist. The door swooshed shut behind him but he had no means to open it again on his own. In front of him was only a single bunk, a small table and a bathroom. If he could have lost his composure, he would have screamed at the top of his lungs. Admiral Kathryn Janeway is an impostor! Clearly, however, no one cared.
6 months before Voyager reaches the Alpha Quadrant: Beta Quadrant
Captain Kathryn Janeway entered the briefing room with Commander Chakotay right behind her. They sat in their respective seats, her at the head of the table, he directly to her left. The entire senior staff was present.
"I know each of you are wondering what the last message from Starfleet said, given the rumors that have been spread since yesterday. I won't keep you in suspense any longer. I have been ordered to put Chakotay under arrest immediately and 'turn him over' upon reaching our rendezvous point. He is to be imprisoned for the remainder of his natural life."
As expected, the room erupted in noise as almost everyone tried to talk at once. Kathryn looked at Chakotay, he gave her a small smile which she returned with an even smaller one. After another minute she held up her hand for quiet.
"I understand, honestly I do. Rest assured, I have no intention of following these orders. We have a plan. The day before we enter the Alpha Quadrant, Chakotay will take the Delta Flyer and proceed to Dorvan V, which as you all know is still being repopulated. We will remain in contact with him until he reaches the planet. That shouldn't take long given the capabilities of the Flyer. At that time, all records, logs, and sensors of his escape will be purged and replaced with information that will indicate the Flyer exploded and the Commander was killed. We will admit that he attempted to escape, but it was unsuccessful."
This time as the two of them looked around the table they were met by smiles and respectful silence. Kathryn got everyone down to work, as details and tasks were discussed over and over until each was certain of the part they would play in saving Chakotay's life.
One day before Voyager reaches the Alpha Quadrant: Beta Quadrant
"Delta Flyer to Voyager" Chakotay's voice was heard over the com.
"Go ahead, Chakotay," Kathryn responded.
"I'll be going to warp in one point three minutes. I just wanted to...thank you all for helping me. Good luck."
"We'll contact you again in an hour. I'll be certain to pass along your message to the entire crew. Voyager out." Kathryn knew that though Chakotay had said his personal good-byes before that day, he'd want one more opportunity to make a connection with the crew he had taken such good care of for so many years.
"Captain, I'm detecting a problem with the Flyer..." Harry's voice pierced the tension on the bridge. "It looks as though structural integrity is failing..."
"Voyager to Delta Flyer!" Kathryn slapped her chest and called out urgently.
Static was the only sound heard.
Kathryn stood up and turned to Ops. Harry's fingers were flying over his console. "Harry..."
"I can't re-establish a com link...structual integrity continues to fail..."
"Beam him out of there!"
"I can't get a lock..." Harry's heart was pounding loudly in his ears, he couldn't figure out what was happening. "The Flyer's lost power...integrity is at 30" The sensor readings continued to confound him.
"Tom, set an intercept course, NOW," Kathryn yelled.
"Captain," Harry's heart had completely stopped as he looked at his readings, "the Flyer...it's exploded..." the words almost didn't make it out of his mouth. "No life signs, virtually no debris..."
The silence on the bridge was deafening. "Tom, DO IT!" Kathryn ordered him to continue on an intercept course.
"Yes, ma'am," the pilot replied. "I told Chakotay..." Tom was speaking half to himself.
"What did you tell him," his captain demanded.
Tom's hands worked the helm efficiently, his eyes to the task. "I told him yesterday, there was something wrong with the manifold...I guess he decided to take the risk..." His voice faltered as the reality of the situation hit him.
Voyager reached the coordinates in five minutes. There was almost no debris, but what was found was beamed aboard for B'Elanna to study. She had to be informed and Tom was relieved of duty to do just that. No one said much. All eyes pretended to face front, but in truth each pair was stealing glances at the Captain. She stared at the viewport with tears falling unashamedly before rising up and going silently to her ready room.
Harry's brain was numb and his heart felt as though a cold hand was clutching it and wouldn't let go. He stared at his con, at the readings, still trying to make some sense of them. A flash of memory hit him. Immediately after the Commander had said his good-bye, there had been a momentary shut down of his sensor panel, so momentary it hadn't registered in his brain at the time. He wasn't even certain he was remembering something real. He rechecked the entire sequence of readings, then did it again. That's when he noticed it. The external temperature of the Flyer was 3 degrees lower after the cut in communications than before. And it was 3 degrees lower than the external temperature of Voyager, not that the fact necessarily meant anything.
He rechecked the temperature data again and found the same thing. Thinking about the situation, he wondered if the plan to manipulate the logs had been changed without his knowledge. The Captain was the only person he felt he could trust with the question. He'd wait until Commander Tuvok left the ready room to ask her.
Three months after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: Starfleet HQ, San Francisco
Admiral Owen Paris took a good look at the woman sitting across from his desk. She appeared much the same as she had three months prior, still with dark circles under her eyes, still with a certain emptiness above the smudges, still thinner than when she left for the Badlands so many years prior.
"So, Kathryn, how was your vacation?"
"It was good. I spent some time in upstate New York and some time in Indiana with my family. I'm ready to come back to work now."
"And in what capacity do you see yourself?"
She hesitated slightly. "I think I'd like to stay planetside and work a desk job, there must be some niche you can put me in? I just don't want to return to space, not yet, Owen."
He didn't hide his surprise. "Are you sure? You've certainly earned whatever position you want, but frankly I can't see you being happy without some exploration in your life."
"I am sure. Honestly." She met his eyes directly.
Owen gave her what she wanted, and vowed to make the recommendation that she be promoted to an admiralty within the year, if she still wanted to remain on the ground. He was still surprised, but not shocked. Tom had told him of her close relationship with Commander Chakotay and he assumed his death had hit her harder than she knew. He made a second vow to watch her closely, to stay in the mentor role, even though she no longer needed him in that capacity. He felt she might need him on a more personal level.
Four months after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: Indiana
"Phoebe, I talked with Kathryn this morning." Gretchen Janeway was having lunch with her younger daughter. "I'm still concerned about her. I can't find out if she is spending time with anyone outside of work. Other than B'Elanna, Tom and Harry, that is. I bet she's not eating any more than she did while she was here. Not enough to feed a bird..."
Phoebe gave her three year old son another quarter of the sandwich. "I thought when she got back from Lake George she'd be, I don't know, more here. I tried so many times to get her to talk about Chakotay, but she wouldn't do it."
"Do you think maybe some counseling would help her?"
"Probably, but how in the world are you going to get her to agree?"
"I am her mother."
"Well, but she isn't exactly being truthful with us. You know, I spoke with Mark last week and he told me that she never showed up to pick out a puppy. I was afraid to tell you..."
"You're kidding," Gretchen was shocked.
"No, I'm not, Mom. Since when does Kathy turn down an opportunity to get a free puppy, especially a grand-sire of Molly's?"
"That does it, she's going to get a talking to - by her mother."
Six months after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: San Francisco
The front door to Kathryn Janeway's apartment chimed. She got up from the kitchen table where she was sorting through a stack of PADDs. Without hesitation she opened the door to greet her visitors.
"Hello Kathryn," B'Elanna said as she walked in with Tom and Harry at her side. "We've just stopped by to check on you, make sure everything is going well."
"Please, come in," she motioned them into the living area.
After the four of them sat down, Harry brought her up to date with his life. He had reunited with Libby and they were getting married. He asked his former Captain to join them all in a celebratory dinner. She refused immediately. Tom, B'Elanna and Harry all looked at one another with indecipherable emotions.
Two years after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: Admiral Owen Paris' Office
"Kathryn," Admiral Paris held out a PADD toward her. "You know this is not an acceptable medical check up. You must see a Starfleet physician."
"But Owen, I had enough poking and prodding of my body by Voyager's EMH to last me a lifetime. My family doctor in Indiana is perfectly qualified to catch any potential medical problems. Give me one good reason, aside from protocol, that I cannot use her instead?"
He recognized that look in her eye, happy on one level to see it return. The spark of defiance, of independence, that had made her such a perfect candidate for the Badlands mission. "Aside from protocol?"
"Yes," she said with determination.
He laughed quietly. "I'm afraid I cannot."
"And am I not an Admiral now?"
"Your point?"
"It seems as though I should be able to decide who my physician will be by this point in my life. I served Starfleet above and beyond the call of duty, even gave up part of my life for all mighty protocols..."
Paris interrupted her. "Are you going to use that argument every time?"
"Perhaps I will. Are you going to deny it's validity every time?"
He sighed deeply. "This is the last time, Kathryn. The last time I push the envelope to cover your butt, if you'll excuse the expression."
She smiled, but for some reason he wasn't reassured. The smile never really reached her eyes, and he found himself disconcerted by it. Tom had promised him that Kathryn was doing much better. He made a decision to contact her family physician directly and see what he could find out about her mental state. From all outward appearances she was performing her duties flawlessly and Command was very happy with her work. Her role as returning hero gave Starfleet the perfect spokesperson for recruitment. And Kathryn seemed happy to oblige them, no matter how little notice they gave her for a speaking engagement. The talks always went well. Still, Admiral Paris was not convinced.
Three years after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: Gretchen Janeway's home
Gretchen was packing the last of her toiletries in the small bag destined for her suitcase. Her medication vials went in last after being double checked for content and amount remaining. It was enough for three weeks. She was giving the plants on the kitchen windowsill a final drink of water when her door chimed and immediately opened.
"Mom!" Phoebe called out. "You ready?"
She left the kitchen, meeting her daughter in the hall. "Of course I am. I've been looking forward to seeing Kathy for weeks now. I've packed and repacked too many times to count, honey!"
"Well, you tell her that I'm glad she's doing better? And I can't wait to see her next month? I wish I could get away..."
"Don't worry, she knows. Besides, now that she has little Eddie, she'll be doing much more walking than she has been. That'll only help her get her strength back. She should be in better shape by next month."
Phoebe smiled and picked up the suitcase. "Come on, Mom, we'd better go. You're gonna have a good time..." Gretchen grinned her crooked grin as they walked out the door.
Three years after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: Harry and Libby Kim's home
"Harry, he needs to eat now, bring him here..." Libby held out her hands for the new baby. Reluctantly, her husband passed the crying child to her.
Tom looked at his friend and chuckled. "Harry, Harry, I never thought I'd see the day when you'd want to hold a fussing baby! You used to be such a wimp around Mira when she was little."
"I was not."
"Were too."
B'Elanna made eye contact with Libby, both of them shook their heads in mock disgust. "Well I think it's nice to see," B'Elanna said to her old friend, putting her arm around his shoulders affectionately. "You're a new papa, and you've taken to it like, what... an Ops boy to a new con!"
Harry smiled, somewhat embarrassed.
"If only Chakotay could see you now, huh, Har?" Tom said. "He'd never believe that you'd really grown all the way up..."
"I guess he wouldn't, would he? I miss him." Harry's admission brought quiet to the three ex-Voyager crew members, each caught up in their own thoughts until the piercing wail of the new baby boy needing to burp brought everyone's reverie to an end...
Six years after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: Near Kathryn Janeway's home
Gretchen was trying to take a walk with Eddie. She was being pulled unrelentingly down the walkway. I'm too old for this, she thought. "Wait, Eddie, slow down..." she said aloud, to no avail. I'd forgotten how energetic they can be... Having to seriously take a breath, she pulled hard herself and was able to stop for a moment. One look at the huge brown eyes staring at her imploringly, however, and she relented. She began to walk again, her pace quickened against her will as her hand was pulled and pulled, moving inexorably toward the park.
Ten years after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: Kathryn Janeway's home
The beep of an incoming message brought Kathryn into the office. She'd been on her way to the bedroom to change her clothing after a particularly long day at HQ. Sitting down at the desk she accessed the message.
To: Admiral Kathryn Janeway
From: Tuvok of Vulcan
Greetings, Admiral. I trust you are well and good. Though it has been only two weeks since our last correspondence I have some news which may be of interest to you. My granddaughter, Rulaavik, has expressed a desire to join Starfleet Academy. She would be an excellent science officer, having already received some training by me here on Vulcan. As I am no longer a fully commissioned Starfleet officer I cannot sponsor her entry. There is no one I have greater respect for than you, Admiral. Would you do the honors for Rulaavik?
T'Pel sends her greetings to you. She also sends her wishes for your continued good health and prosperity.
Tuvok
Kathryn sat, thinking about the content of the message from Vulcan. She sifted through all the possible ramifications of what was being asked of her. Still hesitant, the only decision she made was to contact B'Elanna.
Fifteen years after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: Phoebe Janeway Burdick's home
Phoebe hadn't felt this alone in many many years. The funeral was well attended by both friends and family. Her husband and children had never strayed far from her side even though at times she wanted nothing more than to walk away, by herself, down the road, into the woods, somewhere. She wanted her sister's presence. She curled herself under the covers of her bed and pulled out Kathryn's letter from the bedside table. Dearest Phoebe, Words cannot adequately express my grief to you, both at Mom's death and at my inability to be there with you. So many times in my life you have supported me, despite our differences. So many times of putting your own needs aside. So many times of letting Mom visit me, stay with me, when I know you needed her too. I am so sorry, Phoebe, that in this time of greatest need for both of us, we cannot be together. I know my decisions have had an impact far beyond what I initially expected. I confess I thought many times of this day and wondered what the circumstances would be, and how I would handle it. I've done the best I can. I have to trust that you know that, deep in your heart. Everyone here sends their very best, their love and support. I couldn't survive without it. I will see you soon, very soon I hope. I love you. Kathryn Phoebe placed the letter between her hand and her heart and finally gave in to the overwhelming grief, crying by herself with racking sobs while her husband and their children walked home from a restaurant, having left at her insistence. She cried until she finally fell asleep, the letter crushed in her grip.
Twenty years after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: Starfleet Academy
Tom looked out over the group of new students in his Basic Piloting Skills course. The first day of a new session always held excitement for him, the thrill of the unknown, even though he had been teaching this course for many years. He had learned enough to know that every student would challenge him, some in completely unexpected ways.
Taking a short breather from his introductory lecture his eyes drifted across the room, resting on one student in particular. The jet black hair and dark eyes were remarkable. He so looks like his father, Tom thought with a small smile. The lecture continued.
At the end of the class, Tom immediately made his way to the young man.
"Richard, how are things going? Have you settled into the dorm okay?" Tom touched him gently on the arm.
The brown eyes met his, then darted around to the students leaving the classroom. Seeing that the two of them were mostly alone, Richard answered. "My dormitory room is quite comfortable. My roommate and I seem to get along well," he said seriously.
Tom swallowed a chuckle at the earnestness before him. "Glad to hear it. So listen, B'Elanna would kill me if I didn't invite you over to the house for dinner this week. She hasn't seen you for awhile. How does that sound?"
"That sounds nice. I... I just don't want to be given preferential treatment. Wouldn't be fair."
He is his parents' own son, no doubt about it, Tom thought again. "Don't you worry about that, I'll be giving you the hardest time I can. Your dad won't be thinking you're getting away with anything."
At this Richard smiled deeply. "I guess you do know him pretty well, don't you?"
Tom laughed out loud, slapping the young man on the back. "Your dad, well, can I admit something to you? Just between you and me?" Richard nodded, his eyes alight. "You know how far back your dad and I go, truth is, I love the man. Just don't tell him I said that," Tom said with a sly wink.
"I promise I won't tell him, though, truth be told? Just between you and me?" Tom nodded this time. "I think he loves you, too, Commander Paris. Don't let on, though, it would embarrass the heck out of him..."
Again, Tom laughed out loud. He was glad Richard had joined Starfleet. It would be nice to have a member of the Voyager family in his class. He'd keep an eye on him. Ply a few beers into the young man over a dinner at home. And tell some tales...
23 years after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant, four days before Tuvok is left in the mental hospital: Restaurant near Starfleet HQ
"Admiral, I can't help but notice that you continue to be a light eater," Tuvok lifted one eyebrow at his lunch companion.
"Now, Tuvok, don't start on me," Kathryn said with a small smile. "But I have to say it's nice to hear you do it, been too long, hasn't it?"
"Approximately 22 years and 3 months."
"And I'm happy you've kept in touch. You know Tom said to say hello."
"Mr. Paris is enjoying his teaching?"
"Yes, yes he is. He has many loyal students who have benefited from his piloting skills. Just as they used to benefit from your skills, Tuvok."
"I seem to recall a young captain who didn't believe that." Again the eyebrow raised.
"Are you talking about stardate 43672.9 at 1408 hours in HQ?"
Tuvok thought his former Captain's ability to recall a specific date and time was surprising. She had never been one to have those types of facts so readily on hand. He questioned her. "It is remarkable that you can remember that date, Admiral."
She hesitated for just a moment. "I've been reviewing my old personal logs, thinking about when I was Captain, missing those times." She smiled calmly, a moment or two after completing the explanation. Again, Tuvok was surprised. After all these years, she was missing her captaincy...
23 years after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant, the day after Tuvok's lunch with Kathryn: Her office at Starfleet HQ
"I have allotted approximately 5 days for my visit this time, Admiral," Tuvok said, watching her eyes dart away from his. This in itself was perplexing. The lunch of the day before still crept in and out of his normally implacable brain. Years of working with the Kohlinar masters still, to this day, had not given him the peace he strived for. And here he was, again.
"Well, Tuvok, I'm very happy you've decided to spend more of it with me. I'd love to have lunch with you today. I will be free to go in 34 minutes." Kathryn smiled with genuine fondness.
Thirty four minutes. Not thirty. Or about thirty. For some reason, this preciseness in the Admiral's speech bothered Tuvok. Albeit, she was getting on in years which in humans sometimes manifested in quirks of behavior that hadn't been present when younger. And he hadn't seen her for quite a long time, though he had kept up a regular correspondence with her.
"Admiral. Do you recall the day you led an away mission to Adeneya, to explore the mineral content of the cavern sands? I believe the Federation, at that time, was considering the mining potential there..."
"Of course I remember that day. Stardate 44628.3."
Tuvok looked at his former superior officer. She was smiling, waiting for him to continue with his question. He changed the direction of the conversation. "How is it that you remember the exact stardate of that mission?"
"I've been reviewing my old personal logs, thinking about when I was Captain, missing those times..."
He decided to leave her at that point, having an urge, which in a human would have been felt as extreme, to be alone and think about what he had just experienced. He found a quiet corner of HQ to sit. And contemplate. What happened when he stilled his mind was that he remembered something from twenty three years in the past.
The day the Commander had been killed in the Delta Flyer explosion. Precisely, the hour after the accident had occurred. Tuvok had gone into the ready room to see if the Captain needed anything from him, if she desired to be relieved of duty to retire to her quarters. He was fully cognizant of just how deep her feelings ran for Commander Chakotay though she had never allowed herself to act upon them. He put in an override code for the ready room doors, believing that a human would be crying. He would keep her from having to verbalize an open command. He had no intention of allowing her to keep him at bay.
The ready room doors opened. She was sitting behind the desk, staring at her console. For one point seven seconds she showed no emotion. Until she noticed his presence, at which point she instantaneously became quietly grief stricken. To all outward appearances, it looked as though she had been crying to herself since she escaped to the ready room. He had dismissed it at the time, almost discounting his own perceptions, thinking he just had never seen her express deep grief. Looking back on it now, it appeared to him to be something very much different. That was not a human reaction. Therefore, the woman in the ready room, the same woman now occupying Admiral Kathryn Janeway's office, was an impostor. This was not Kathryn Janeway.
And if this was not Kathryn Janeway, then the subterfuge had been going on since before Voyager entered the Alpha Quadrant twenty three years ago. Thinking further about his interactions with the Captain after the accident, he realized that it was she who convinced him his concerns over the explosion were unfounded. She ordered him to drop the subject out of respect for the crew's, and her, grief process. And why else would she do that but to deter any investigation of the circumstances surrounding Commander Chakotay's death. Therefore, the Commander likely was deliberately murdered. By this impostor. For if they ever met again, he, more than anyone, would know that this was not Kathryn Janeway.
Tuvok sat thinking over the ramifications of his deductive reasoning. He could find no reason for the very very skilled subterfuge. Unless an alien presence was wanting to infiltrate Starfleet. But then why would they wait so long to do anything serious? He was quite certain of his conclusion, however. And he suddenly knew exactly what he should do about it. He got up and headed for Admiral Finnegan's office. One of the 'old guards'. Someone he could trust.
23 years after Voyager's return to the Alpha Quadrant: Dorvan V, early evening
The house and the land surrounding it had the look of being long occupied. Traditional building methods had been resurrected during the repopulation process, in hopes that the tribal customs would follow, for those members of the tribe that returned. They brought with them friends and new families, mixed blood. So whereas the gene pool would be more complex, the rituals and rites would continue.
The house was white stucco with exposed beams and a tile roof. The expansive porch across the front had plenty of furniture to relax in, to look out over the gardens to the outer buildings, one of which housed a larger than normal shuttle craft. An older man and woman walked hand in hand through the front gate from the direction of the village, entering the house, greeting the two dogs and a cat who demanded to be fed a long overdue dinner.
In the kitchen after tending to the animals, the couple took a moment to embrace tightly.
"So, grandma, how 'bout we take our drinks to the garden?" Chakotay said, brushing a stray lock of graying hair from Kathryn's face. She smiled at him as only she could, causing the usual warm glow to surround his heart.
"Sounds good to me, grandpa," she replied, chuckling.
"Forget I called you that, love. If we're going to use only those names from now on, I protest. I certainly don't feel that old..." He pulled away to get some glasses out of the cabinet while she found the iced tea.
"You don't look - or act - that old, either," she said with a wink. "But just wait 'til Taya brings the baby for us to sit and we have to get up for the two a.m. feeding. It's been twenty years since we had to do that!"
"Point taken..." he answered with a grin, one dimple showing through the creases in his now darker face.
Drinks poured they headed outside. As they got to the front porch, the sound of an incoming message was heard on the living room console. He offered to pick it up. She continued on to the garden to wait. Sitting in the quiet, looking at the moons rising, she thought she couldn't be happier, more content, more peaceful at that moment. The sisters were dancing tonight, as Kolopak and his son would say. It was true. The two moons seemed to mirror each other, something that didn't happen often. She sighed with gratitude.
A grandchild. Their first grandchild. Their beautiful Taya had given them a granddaughter, who from present appearances was going to carry on the dark tribal looks and not the fair Irish looks of her mother. So the child would look like her father, and her grandfather. She would be beautiful, no doubt. And smart as both parents, and as determined. Kathryn laughed. Taya would have her hands full, as she had with her. Looking back on it, Kathryn felt that if it hadn't been for Chakotay's calming presence she would have run screaming from motherhood. What was ironic is that Taya turned out to be much more like Chakotay in temperament as she grew into her personality though she looked more like Kathryn.
And then came Edward. The spitting image of his father. Blazing deep brown eyes. Jet black hair. The combined scientific curiosity and explorer's spirit of both his parents. And the temperament of his mother, at least according to his father. "Pig-headedness" was the term often thrown around, always with good humor. She turned at the sound of her husband's footsteps on the pathway.
"That was Richard," Chakotay said with a twinkle in his eye.
"Honey..." Kathryn's tone was mildly rebuking.
He laughed. "Sorry. After two and a half years, you know I still can't resist. That was Eddie. He got the message about his new niece and is thrilled, he's still not quite certain whether he's going to pass warp mechanics, is not looking forward to temporal physics no matter how much fun we claim it will be, he is looking forward to coming with everyone to the party day after tomorrow, and he heard a rumor about Tuvok."
Kathryn pulled back sharply from her resting spot on Chakotay's chest. "What about Tuvok?"
"Well, he's not entirely sure. Something about being sent to a hospital. Eddie thought it might be a mental hospital, but since that didn't make sense, he's assuming it's a medical facility."
"Oh my God, you know he was due to visit San Francisco... you don't think he developed some suspicions..."
"That hadn't occurred to me. Spirits, what do you think he'd do if he did?"
Kathryn was quiet. "I have no idea. Come on, we've got to contact Tom and B'Elanna. They must know something..."
Three hours later, after eating some dinner and listening to some music, trying to read without success to pass the time, finally just curling up together on the couch and talking, the console finally beeped. Kathryn practically flew to it, Chakotay was right behind her. With sinking hearts, they read Tom's message. The positive news was that Admiral Paris was already trying to do something to get Tuvok released. Owen couldn't tell the authorities the truth, but he could tell Tuvok as long as Kathryn approved it. She sent her approval immediately.
She and Chakotay talked for another hour, going over the ramifications. Eventually, they both agreed. With each other, and with B'Elanna and Harry. Admiral Kathryn Janeway would have to be eliminated.
The next morning was spent with their daughter and new granddaughter. Making sure Taya needed for nothing, knew her parents were a stones throw away and loved her more than life itself. She was tired but happy. She felt badly about Tuvok, was dying to see her baby brother hold his niece in his arms, and felt more positive about motherhood on this day than the year leading up to it. She and Kanwarta had decided to name the baby Gretchen. A tribal second name could be chosen at a later time. She would always be Gretchen. Kathryn cried as she rocked her granddaughter.
The afternoon brought them visitors. Truth be told, both Kathryn and Chakotay's hearts were pounding loudly as they went to answer the door, clutching hands tightly. Three of the four people at the door greeted them warmly with hugs. The fourth, after perusing them carefully with one eyebrow raised almost to the top of his forehead, stepped forward and shook their hands. Kathryn had to control herself from hugging Tuvok tightly to her, having missed him for so long.
Chakotay took the lead, pulling everyone into the dining room, offering drinks and refreshments while the four guests sat themselves down. Hosting duties finished, the impromptu meeting began, discussing the problem embodied by Admiral Janeway. B'Elanna gave her diagnosis, which Harry again concurred with and Tom supported.
Kathryn suddenly realized that she really didn't care how the problem was solved, she wanted to take Tuvok outside and show him around, to try and explain the past twenty three years to a man she used to consider one of her closest advisors and friends. She interrupted the discussion to do just that, grateful to the spirits when Tuvok agreed.
They walked outside into the gardens, Kathryn talking of their home, their daughter and son and new granddaughter, all of which Tuvok knew from the three people in the house. He allowed her to talk uninterrupted. Eventually they sat on the same bench she and Chakotay had occupied the night before. She had so much to say and wasn't sure in which direction to continue. He took advantage of the lull.
"Captain," but she interrupted him.
"Tuvok, I'm just Kathryn now. No captain. Kathryn," she said with a smile.
"Very well, Kathryn. I have many questions if you don't mind," he began again. She shook her head. "The first one is simple and I believe I know the answer. Why didn't you inform me?"
She knew there was more behind the question than a simple answer, for both of them. "I want you to understand that the decision was extraordinarily difficult for me. You were my friend, my advisor, my counsel. But you were also a firm believer in Starfleet and you are a Vulcan. You cannot lie. I wasn't certain I could count on our secret being held by you. I didn't know that you were planning on retiring again."
"But you did trust that I would keep the Commander's secret, his plan to return to Dorvan."
"Yes, but we had already decided to stage his death, so that no one would have to keep the secret. We couldn't take the risk. Someone would say something to somebody. I couldn't take that risk, I just couldn't, Tuvok."
"Indeed. When did you decide to go with him?"
Kathryn chuckled. "You may not believe this, but the nanosecond I got the message from Command to put him in the brig. I had already decided a long time ago that I was going to ask him to give us a second chance once we got back home. Honestly? The decision started to form in my mind the day we broke orbit from the Quarren planet. I... I had a realization that Chakotay, well, he was still in love with me, and I had felt a powerful connection with him even though I was brainwashed. Then, when he was lost with the Ventu, actually when you and Harry told me he was possibly dead, crashed on the planet, it hit me straight in the gut. I would get him back, and I would never let him go again. Sounds melodramatic, doesn't it?"
"It sounds very human, Kathryn... and perfectly logical."
"Yes, well, the decision was made. I can guess your next question."
"Indeed?"
"We told B'Elanna first. She was the only one who was going to know, but then we three realized it couldn't be kept from Tom. So when Chakotay and I left on the Flyer, only the two of them knew."
"And Mr. Kim?"
"He figured it out after the 'explosion'. We made a slight miscalculation of the temperature. Harry noticed the difference and went to his Captain to ask if there was something he should understand. She referred him to B'Elanna. We left B'Elanna in charge of making judgment calls. She brought Harry into the loop, and it was the best decision that could have been made. The two of them have worked together all these years to keep the Admiral going."
"And her program is finally breaking down, I understand. Thus, the glitches that caused my own little 'breakdown'."
Kathryn laughed, chagrined. "I believe you just made one of your jokes, Tuvok..."
"Indeed."
"Can you accept my apology? You do know that the correspondence between us over the years has been real, don't you? Did they tell you that? All of your letters were forwarded here, and I answered them. That was all the truth, Tuvok, as much of it as I could tell you." Kathryn was suddenly beside herself with need for his forgiveness.
Tuvok stood and walked a few paces away from her. Uncharacteristically for him. When he turned around she could see the change in his eyes. "I accept it. Kathryn."
She felt tears falling down her cheeks. Wiping them away she smiled at him. "Thank you. So can you stay for a day or two? We're having a party tomorrow, to celebrate our first grandchild's birth. Eddie's coming home, and Tom, B'Elanna, Harry and Libby are coming. They'll be leaving in a little while to go back to Earth and get things squared away. My sister and her family are coming..." He interrupted her.
"Kathryn, may I ask you another question? It sounds as though life has been pleasant for you here. What about Starfleet?"
"Oh, Tuvok, I had a little trouble for the first few months, but you know, I'd been answering to no-one for years, and I was tired, and I wanted to be with the man I loved. It wasn't really a very hard decision to make. I've never regretted it. I've taught at the school, I've helped raise two wonderful children, I've even learned how to cook. A little. And Chakotay, he's had a great life. He's been acting in the background with the colony council as an advisor, he's looked up to as a hero, he's found peace here. Everyone's kept our secret. And Taya, she'll be on the council next year. Her husband is the grandson of Anthwara, who was head of the colony when the treaty with Cardassia was hammered out. We've made a real difference here. We've left a legacy. There are no regrets."
"But now the Admiral must be eliminated."
"Yes, well, perhaps that mobile emitter can be brought here. We could always use another doctor."
"Kathryn, I believe you just made one of your jokes."
She laughed out loud. "Indeed, Tuvok, indeed. Come on, let's go inside. I'm missing my husband something awful..."
End.