Hello, readers new and old. It's been too long since we last had a story going.
Our story this time will try to bring back some things we missed about our take on Gen V. The humor will still be commentary on the games and villain songs, but we will also add stupid humor and maybe even confirm a few ships. This chapter will be full of references, so be prepared to keep them all straight.
Now that the important parts are out of the way, it's time to get started.
In the Kalos region, there was a town. In this town, there was a house. In this house, there was a bed. And in this bed, there was a boy.
This boy was dreaming of riding his mother's Rhyhorn down the street, a reoccurring thought. In fact, it was so realistic that he wasn't even aware he was sleeping until he felt something small and hard dive-bomb him. Letting out a cry of pain and surprise, the boy tumbled out of bed, the thud being heard even from downstairs.
The woman smiled to herself. Good, she thought, he's up. Took him long enough.
When the boy came downstairs, still in his pajamas, he was holding her Fletchling by the feet, ignoring the bird's attempts at escape and cries for help.
"Why?" he asked, not specifying what he was talking about. But the woman merely returned to making their usual Saturday pancake breakfast, knowing exactly what he meant.
"I'd already called you four times," she pointed out. "Each time, you said that you'd be down in a minute."
"And you believed me?"
She put a plate in front of him, scooping the pancakes onto a tray to make a buffet line. "Just because you're seventeen now doesn't mean you can spend all summer up in your room, sleeping and playing your violent video games."
"I only have one violent video game, Mom," the boy protested.
"Don't you kill things in your Zelda collection?"
"Well, yeah...but Zelda has an actual plot. It's not just 'kill monsters,' it's 'kill monsters, protect Hyrule and save the princess from being used as a human sacrifice.'"
"I'm not going for technicalities, Calem," the woman sighed. "It's summer! You're out of school, you don't have homework, and we just moved to a new region! Make some new friends, call your old ones, meet a girl, just do something."
Calem grumbled something incomprehensible, but released the Fletchling and piled pancakes onto his plate.
The knock at the door interrupted the discussion, and the woman opened it. There stood two pretty girls, both around her son's age. The shorter one looked about fifteen, just short, while the taller seemed to be around seventeen herself. The tall one cleared her throat nervously, before deciding to just wing it.
"Hi, I'm Serena. I live here in town, and Shauna and I were told that there was a boy here?"
Wheels began turning in the woman's head, and she recalled the words she'd said to Calem moments earlier. Make new friends...meet a girl...
Well, two girls around his age would make perfect friends.
"You know, I was just telling my son he should make some new friends." She shot an irritated look back into the house when she heard Calem's whine, but continued anyway. "What brings you by this early in the morning?"
Serena tried peeking into the house, but Calem had taken his breakfast to the couch and was now watching television. "I was asked to bring him along to a meeting, and Shauna here is always interested in meeting new friends. Can you convince him for us?"
The woman smiled. "If you'll give me a few minutes, I'm sure I can."
When Calem stepped out of the house half an hour later, fully dressed and slightly crabby, he couldn't stop the groan of frustration that escaped him.
"What kind of mission is this?" he asked, and Shauna just smiled.
"You'll see," she cheered, bouncing a little in her excitement. "We're running late already, we have to get to Aquacorde Town!"
Aquacorde Town wasn't that much different from Vaniville. The only things Calem noticed were Serena, Shauna, and two boys that seemed to be younger than he was. There was a taller, chubbier fellow, and a kid that looked closer to twelve than seventeen, with obnoxiously bright red hair.
"There you are!" the tall one laughed, waving them down. "Over here, Trevs and I already picked our Pokémon out!"
"You what?" Serena gasped, pretending to care. "Tierno, I'm shocked! Haven't you guys ever heard of the expression 'ladies first?' Shauna and I weren't even here!"
Tierno pretended to hit her with the lid of the box. "Maybe if you had hurried up, you could have had a chance."
"Hey, it's not our fault. We had to go and collect this rock."
She gestured to Calem, who had slumped down at the table behind them. He lifted a hand in a half-hearted attempt at a wave.
"Hey," he said shortly, and rested his face against the table.
Shauna reached over and pulled him out of the seat, and Calem noticed that she had quite a bit of strength for such a small girl. "You're not really a morning person, are you?" she asked, and the boy shook his head.
"Not at all."
"Well, you should probably get over that, because we're here for a reason!" She pointed into the box. "In there are actual, living, breathing Pokémon. Professor Sycamore sent them, just for the five of us! Well, three," she corrected herself, shooting a pointed look at Trevor and Tierno. "Some people are just impatient, it seems."
"Just shut up and pick your starters," was the only thing Tierno had to say.
Calem peeked into the box, almost fully awake by excitement alone, having never seen the Kalos starters. Through the semi-transparent red lids of the balls, he could make out what appeared to be a frog (clearly the Water-type) and a fox and...
Was that an otter? But the frog was an aquatic animal...
"I pick this one," he said, reaching in and puling out the ball with the mystery Pokémon. "I've got enough questions - who you guys are, why Mystery Professor chose me - and I think taking this little guy or girl will speed up the answering process."
"That is a Chespin," Serena said, reaching into the box and choosing her own starter from the options. "It's the local Grass-type starter. As for who we are...Trevor is a photographer, and the one who has actually met Professor Sycamore in person. Tierno is a dancer, and I think the reason he was chosen for a Pokedex instead of just going on a journey was because the professor really wants to see a dancing Haxorus or something. Shauna here may look cute and unassuming, but she once watched a medical training video for fifty bucks and didn't puke once."
"I forgot about that," Shauna said with a grin, picking up the last Pokeball. "I guess I just have really strong willpower."
"She used witchcraft," Trevor muttered, clearly not intending to be heard.
Shauna stuck out her tongue, but otherwise left the comment alone. "And Serena's had modeling jobs," she explained, to Serena's embarrassment.
"One job," Serena corrected quietly. "I've been in online advertisements for my aunt's shop."
"You're a model?" Calem asked the question before he could stop himself. "Why did Professor Sycamore choose a model for a Pokedex adventure?"
"My dad was an active Champion," Serena said, as if that was a good enough answer, "and he met my mom when she challenged him."
"So he picked you because it's in the blood."
Serena took a while to answer that one. "It could be," she finally said, "but I was adopted, so I don't know. My...current parents are the ones I was talking about. They probably told him that I was good at using their Pokémon for battle."
"You'll be fine," Tierno said, but, figuring a change in topic was in order, he turned to Calem. "What about you?"
"Huh?" Calem was pulled rather forcibly from his thoughts, and when he realized that all of them were looking at him, he cleared his throat. "Oh. I'm Calem Xavier. I play video games, and I was thinking of starting a Let's Play channel before the girls showed up and my mom threw me out."
But the others had stopped listening almost immediately. "Your last name is Xavier?" Serena looked like he'd just told her she'd won the lottery, and she turned to Shauna, almost begging. "You were talking about nicknames," she said innocently, and Calem was instantly on guard. "What do you say to calling him Professor X?"
Well, there were worse ways this nickname thing could have gone. At least 'Professor' showed respect. Sycamore might not like it, he worked hard for the title, but he might understand the reference.
"I don't know," Shauna said uncertainly, eyeing Calem carefully. "He's got the name for it, but..."
"I'm fine with it," Calem promised. "Just as long as I get to pick a nickname for her. I'm thinking Rini, because it's short and annoying, just like her."
"You're not that much taller than me," Serena protested, but Shauna laughed out loud.
"Rini it is," she decided. "They started calling me 'Shaunee,' Tierno's been calling Trevor 'Trevs' since we got here, and Tierno..." She frowned. "I don't think he's got one yet."
"Just call me T," Tierno said, poking himself in the chest with a thumb. "Unless you can call me Batman."
"Can't," Shauna said, tugging on the scrunchy she wore around her wrist. "Xavier has the name for a superhero, you don't. Unless you get superpowers, we can't keep up the name theme."
"Batman doesn't have superpowers," Tierno pointed out. "And neither does Calem, so you didn't think that argument through."
"How would you know Calem doesn't have superpowers?" Trevor asked, again keeping mostly quiet.
"We're not calling you Batman," Serena said, as if she had the final say in the matter. "What about nicknaming our Pokémon, instead?"
Shauna held her starter's ball hopefully. "I got the Froakie, and it says mine's a girl. Since we decided that the name Xavier made a reference too good to ignore, I'll continue with the fiction theme. I'm thinking...Nya."
Trevor seemed to be the only one who understood where that nickname came from. "After the character from that Lego show?"
"Why not?" She tapped Froakie's ball. "It kind of fits, and...well, she'll grow into it."
Trevor grinned at the joke. The others all agreed not to ask.
"I'm not giving mine a name," Tierno announced. "Giving Pokémon nicknames sounds like it could get confusing."
"Only for people not involved in your journey," Shauna protested, but she agreed that it was his decision to make. "What about you, Rini?"
"Juliet," Serena answered immediately. "No question there. What about yours, Calem?"
Calem stared at his new Chespin through the case. He didn't know how Serena and Shauna could tell that theirs were female - he assumed his was a boy, due to the average gender ratio that starter Pokémon usually had, but maybe the professor had managed to pull a few strings for an all-female selection?
Shauna passed him a sheet of paper. It said that there were two females in the group, a Froakie and a Fennekin. The Chespin, it stated, was male. Uncertain of what to expect, he released his Pokémon, taking his first look at him.
It wasn't an otter after all. It was a small brown rodent, with what looked like an unripe nut on its head.
"Eddie," he decided, and the Chespin looked up at him, mildly confused. "We'll show you the references for Shauna and Serena's choices when we get home. Which," he added, glaring pointedly at the girls, "is where we're heading. Tell the professor that I said thank you for the Pokémon, but that I have no idea what he wants from me and my mom might say no."
"I think he made plans for that," Tierno said, pulling a letter from the box. "Your mom's name is Grace, right?"
"It is."
"Good. Then this is hers." He handed over the letter, where Calem noticed that it was on very nice paper. "I think it might be one of those 'I'm sending your kid on an adventure' things that professors are known for."
"Why couldn't he call her instead?"
"Because he's weird like that." Serena rolled her eyes. "Mom and Dad met him in person to put in the request for my Pokedex, they said that he takes some getting used to."
Calem looked down at Eddie, as if hoping that his new Chespin had a reply somewhere. Eddie had no suggestions.
Calem actually didn't care. He had a Pokémon. And Trevor handing out Pokedexes was a bonus he hadn't been expecting.
"Hey, Calem! Before you go, how about a battle?"
And Shauna's challenge was an even better surprise.
It was a very fast battle.
Calem wasn't used to starter Pokémon knowing a move of their own type as soon as the trainer had picked them out, but then, he wasn't used to Kalos, either. Or being a trainer, for that matter.
Still, with Eddie knowing Vine Whip and Nya being a Water-type, the Froakie was down in five minutes, and the Chespin jumped up to high-five his new trainer.
Did Pokémon usually like their trainers this fast?
"I wasn't done watching her yet!" Shauna complained, diverting his attention. "You could have at least pretended to take damage!"
"I thought being a trainer was about bonding with Pokémon and all that." Calem looked down at Nya, who was getting to her feet and looking up at Shauna with big eyes. "She forgives you."
"I know she does." Shauna got down and scooped the Froakie into her arms. "Come on, Nya. Let's get you healed."
"I'll lead you," Tierno said, jumping to his feet, and they walked off into the distance. Trevor followed, mumbling an excuse of returning to Professor Sycamore, leaving Calem and Serena alone.
Calem had never been with a girl unsupervised before. He hoped it didn't show. "So," he said, trying to think of a way to make conversation, "have you battled Trevor with your...uh..."
"Fennekin," Serena finished helpfully. She didn't seem to mind that he'd forgotten. "And her name is Juliet."
"As in that play where a war between families makes everyone die?"
No sooner had the words left his mouth than he mentally slapped himself. This was why he needed supervision around girls.
But Serena laughed it off. "An unintentional reference, but I guess so. We're hoping to live." She started on her way home, and then looked back. "Well? You have a letter to deliver to your mom, and we both have Pokémon to show off. I'm sure she'll want to know what you chose."
Calem wanted to know what Serena planned to accomplish on her journey, but he followed her back home without saying a word, Eddie behind him and Juliet in her ball.
If he was going on a journey, a real one instead of staying behind a screen, he had plenty of time to get to know her.