A.N.: Hi again! This story is inspired by the brief teasing conversation in "Criss Angel is a Douchebag." which was a fairly sad episode with a HILARIOUS title. Set when Sam is 13 and Dean is 17, my first attempt at Wee!chesters so please let me know what you think. So many lines in the show are I SWEAR put in there for the sake of fanfiction writers. Some are like fanfic catnip, this was one of them :) Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Not mine.
"Oh, right, right, I forgot. You were actually into this stuff, weren't you?I mean, you had like a deck of cards and a wand."
"Dude, I was thirteen. It was a phase."
He thought it was really amazing the first time he saw it. He was on a case being shuffled along by his brother and Dad, staring forlornly at the ground when a jumbled round of applause sounded to his left. His head shot up as the crowd pushed in, anxious to see more from the man performing. Sam stopped in his tracks, watching the arc of fire in the air and making a small noise of surprise when Dean bumped into him.
"Dude, what the hell?" he questioned, following his brothers gaze to the attraction.
Sam stared flabbergasted as the man made a dramatic sweep with his long flowing cape and disappeared in a puff of smoke.
"Whoa." he breathed quietly as his older brother snorted besides him.
"You're digging Houdini? Seriously?"
Sam ducked his head in embarrassment. "It just looked kinda cool." he mumbled, mostly to his shoes.
"You kidding me Sammy? We get to go Rambo on things people don't even dream about week after week, and you're daydreaming about card tricks?"
Sam scuffed his feet against the ground muttering "Forget it." and quickening his pace back to his father.
He couldn't help it that he found it so fascinating, the sort of allure he felt watching the obvious sleight of hand and illusion. It would seem weird to most people, and incredibly nerdy to Dean, but to Sam it was a glimpse of normal, as normal as he could grasp anyway.
He shouldn't have been surprised when a week later he plopped into the back seat and had to shift against a box on his backside. Dean met his eyes in the rear-view mirror, ghosting a smile when Sams' eyebrows lifted on his face. Advanced Magic Kit read in block letters at the top of the box, complete with wand, deck of cards, handcuffs, a set of illusion tricks and a shiny red cloak.
Dean grinned wide as he leaned back and breathed. "I had to lift that from some little girl who was wearing the cloak and having a tea party, I hope you're happy,"
Sam chuckled softly, shoving his brother and leaning back in the seat. "Shut up Dean."
His brother didn't offer a reply just leaned his head towards the window and smiled.
He wasn't smiling a week later as he held up his cuffed hand and gave it a slight jiggle.
Sam was connected to the other end of the jiggle and let out an exasperated sigh.
"Dean, stop it." he said softly.
"Oh sorry, am I bothering you? My hands starting to fall asleep dude, you don't like it, tough."
Sam rolled his eyes in his brothers' direction, feeling slightly guilty for having put them in that situation in the first place.
"Come on Dean it will be fun!"
"Sam, I'm busy, got stuff to do before Dad gets back from his hunt." his brother didn't even look up from the map in front of him.
Sam waited for another five minutes before shifting back into Deans line of sight. "Come on man, one trick, just one."
His older brother looked at the clock, mentally calculating the last time Sam had bugged him. It had been a couple of hours.
Dean exhaled a long suffering sigh. "Fine dude, one trick, just one and make it quick."
Sam ran back to his magic kit picking through the cards and swinging the cloak around his shoulders. "Inescapable handcuffs." he mused, grabbing them from the bottom as well.
Dean suffered through three card tricks which he let his little brother believe he performed right before Sam brandished the handcuffs with a flourish.
"No way man." the eldest Winchester grumbled.
Sam knew his brother well enough to say. "Yeah you're probably right, they are inescapable."
The cuffs were out of his hands and on their wrists before he could even process what had happened.
"Inescapable my ass." his brother smirked.
Several hours, a pile of paperclips, a dulled knife, and an expert lock pick later the only thing that was inescapable was the fact that the Winchester boys were tethered together.
Dean had to admit he was kind of impressed with the fact that he couldn't pick the cuffs. Although becoming less so every minute he was still stuck to his little brother.
Sams' face pulled into a pout as he shoved the box aside. "There's no key in there."
"What?" Dean yanked the box to him, rummaging through the contents inside. "Where the hell is it?"
"I don't know, but it's not in there."
"Dammit Sam this has officially stopped being funny, I want out of these stupid things now!"
"Oh yeah, being handcuffed to you is my ideal way to spend a Saturday." Sam replied dryly.
"You and most of the female population Sammy." Dean coupled the comment with a wide grin.
Sam shook his head with a chuckle.
The camaraderie didn't last very long as Deans' gaze slid back to the infuriating metal at his wrist.
"Seriously dude, it's been fun, but you really need to get us out of these." Dean pulled uselessly against the bond again.
Sam joined the effort with similar results.
"What do you want me to Dean?"
"I don't know, wave your wand around, and say the magic words, whatever it takes man."
Sam shrugged his shoulders leaning up against the cabinet at his back. "What about shooting it?"
"Come again?"
"Yeah a bullet hits it in the right spot it should break the chain."
"Or it could ricochet and blow your head off." Dean stated.
"Do you have a better idea?" Sam asked irritably.
Deans' eyes lit up as he rummaged in the cabinet behind him.
"Yeah I actually do." He beamed, holding up a container of Crisco.
Sam gulped.
Another hour later all the escape attempt had produced was sticky hands, a palpable vexation in the room and two seething brothers.
It was about an hour later when Dean said. "This is the last time I indulge you little bro."
Sam halted trying to pick the lock with a push pin and looked up to say "What?"
Frustration was creasing lines onto Deans' face as he rubbed absently at the pink chafe on his wrist. "If you had just left me alone Sam we wouldn't be in this mess."
"If you weren't so sure about your ability to get out of them we wouldn't be in this mess."
Deans' head fell backwards and thunked against the cabinet. "Man we make quite a pair."
"Yeah," Sam laughed. "We are a regular Siegfried and Roy."
"I don't like cats."
They laughed for a minute before Dean pushed up to his feet, half hauling up his younger brother with him.
"Sorry Dean." Sam grumbled as his brother threw a hand over his shoulder.
"Don't worry about it Sammy." and shuffled them both into the bed.
Sam was yawning, a day of exhausting escape attempts taking a toll on him.
"Dad's gonna be pissed." he mumbled, rolling over into the pillows.
"Naw dude, we tried everything but a blow torch to get these off. We'll try again tomorrow. Dad won't be back for another couple of days. We got time Sam."
"The key was in there Dean, I swear, I don't know where it went."
Dean peeled off his brothers shoes with his own feet, thinking sleeping arrangements were going to be interesting since Sam was always so restless.
"I know man, it's fine. Just go to sleep, we will figure it out." Dean leaned against the headboard, amused at his brother fighting sleep.
"Just thought it would be cool." his speech was slow.
"It was pretty cool. They weren't joking when they said inescapable." he replied trying not to think of the wasted day, besides Sam couldn't run off and get in trouble now and that was always a plus. He just hoped nothing creepy or crawly bothered them tonight. Killing something one armed would be totally badass though.
"Thanks Dean." Sam whispered and when he turned to ask for what his baby brother had lost the battle.
He pushed a flop of bangs away from his little brothers' forehead, going to loosen the tie of the cape. He pulled it off one handed, tossing in onto the floor, laughing slightly when he went to shuffle Sam to the other side of the bed and the kid barely moved.
Sam flopped over once in the middle of the night, taking his pillow with him as he curled around the object. The chain tugged on Deans' wrist and he was instantly awake, pushing himself into a sitting position and blinked against the sliver of moonlight cutting into the room…illuminating a small silver key that would have been resting under the pillow. He could remember Sam earlier in the day having the whole kit spread out on the bed, ignoring the plethora of weapons that littered the surface as he fiddled with his prize. Dean stifled a laugh into his free palm as he swiped the key off of the bed, the soft pop of the cuff coming free a glorious sound. Sam didn't even wake up as he undid his hand too just sighed in sleep and rolled towards his brother. Dean stared at the cuffs for a minute before laying them on the nightstand, getting up to lie on the other bed. He turned to wish his brother goodnight again, pausing at the younger Winchesters' face, curling up into what was the beginning of a nightmare. Sam shifted away from him as if even in sleep he was embarrassed of his weakness as Dean sighed once, and arranged himself back on the bed with his brother, one arm draped over the sleeping being. Figures he was finally free and ended up back with his brother. As the face transformed back into innocence and contentment though he couldn't mind too much.
Or in the morning when he woke up to a stack of pancakes, apology Sammy style.
A.W. Done, hope you guys like. I just finished watching S4 with my little sister and I really needed some fluff to go with it. Happy Saturday!