Chapter Written by PSyCHeDeLiCxCaRNiVaL

Fukanzen

The floor shifted and creaked under the weight of Fukanzen's footsteps as he made his way across the old, dusty attic. A melancholic expression that perfectly matched the atmosphere was sketched across his face, barely lit by the streams of thin sunlight filtering in through the single window high up near the rooftop. Although the attic was warm, and it was the beginning of spring, a small shiver ran through the boy and he pulled his coat closer.

He scanned over the many boxes, racks, and chests that were strewn about the small space, looking for a few select ones to bring down to the first floor of the house. Master had asked him to find a few boxes whose contents weren't needed anymore down so they could go through them and choose what to keep. It was a part of spring cleaning, as she called it. Nothing special really, and Fukanzen actually enjoyed going through the nearly forgotten items found up in the attic. It brought in a nostalgic feeling, though seeing as he was very young…he didn't have too many extremely precious memories.

After finding what he was looking for, the dark haired boy stacked four worn-out looking boxes with torn labels and hoisted them up into his arms. He struggled a little under the weight; he was definitely not the strongest person ever. His eye twitched a little, followed by blurring vision. A sigh escaped his pale lips; another eye glitch. That seemed to happen a lot more often now that he was getting older.

Then again, there seemed to be a lot of glitches about him. Oh, he knew there were others out there like him, who were created on files, who were meant to sing. He just…didn't know where they were, or if they even existed anymore. Most of his life he had lived in the same house with Master, and he loved her like he would an older sister who served as his "mother". But he had to wonder if he there could possibly ever be a time where he would be able to meet the rest like him face to face. His wondering usually led him to other questions; such as if there might be something off about him that was causing him to be kept away from them. Or what if there really were more like him, but they were all so distant he would never be able to reach them?

Being uncertain about things, especially about himself, was something he really hated. While it did allow the mind to become more open towards certain scenarios, it also allowed "what if" questions to come in. And if there was something Fukanzen hated more than uncertainty, it was "what if" questions. Questions like that never led to certain answers, which started the cycle of uncertainty all over again.

Smiling a little at his cycle of thoughts, the dark haired boy descended down the equally creaky stairs, walked down a short hallway, and into the kitchen, all the while too preoccupied with his thoughts to notice Master at the table. He paused and set the boxes down on the ground, wincing a little at the sound of something shattering in the very bottom box. Turning his attention over to Master, he noticed the faded-looking album laid out on the small table in front of her. From the angle he was at, the sunlight streaming through the windows lined along the wall covered the actual images in the pictures, leaving shining patterns instead.

"Who's in the pictures?" Fukanzen asked quietly, making his way over to Master's side and peering down at the now clear pictures. None of them looked familiar in the one he was looking at; there was a girl with long turquoise hair held up in two pigtails doing a ridiculous pose for the camera, and a boy with the same color hair as her deadpanning in the background. Upon looking closer, he saw why; there was a redhead who looked older than him pulling the tealette into his lap and putting him in a headlock.

"Ah, these; well, they're just some old pictures with a few…friends of mine that I found while cleaning out my closet," Master replied, jumping a little at the sudden sound of his voice. She smiled a little as she thumbed through a few other pages, the pictures flying by so quickly they appeared in a blur of colors and faces. There was such a nostalgic sound to her voice that even Fukanzen faintly smiled. He really did love how memories could make anybody suddenly just feel.

A look of discomfort crossed over her usual cheerful expression when she stopped on a page, though she quickly hid it with another smile and closed the album as though nothing had caught her attention.

"Tell you what; I'm going to go get some drinks for us. Would you mind unpacking that first box so we can go through it?" she asked, moving the album to the very end of the table.

Fukanzen nodded in response, the smile instantly vanishing from his face. Secrecy was another thing he didn't like… Secrecy was something that was more prone to causing hurt than nearly anything else in the world. And it never fixed anything for long. He'd learned that a long time ago, back when he'd first discovered his…ability…to "glitch" certain things…along with his ability to "phase into" anything electronic. When Master had found out…a look similar to the one she'd had just now had taken over, and she'd seemed almost afraid. She was never afraid, especially not of him. Even now he still wondered exactly why she'd looked at him like he was something to be feared.

He glanced over at the closed album lying abandoned on the kitchen table, feeling his curiosity pique. As he opened up and went through the first box, he couldn't get his mind off that one picture he'd managed to see clearly. Although the boy and girl with teal hair weren't necessarily familiar-looking…the one with red hair had been. He just couldn't think of who the man had resembled.

Once he'd gone through nearly everything in the box, which had turned out to be more or less old headphone sets and microphones along with crumpled up music sheets, he looked over at the album again. Although he knew he'd end up feeling guilty about it later on…he just couldn't help himself.

Soundlessly, Fukanzen stepped around the rest of the closed boxes and slid the picture album across the table until it was directly in front of him. He blinked once before opening the album, leafing through the pages, scanning for any familiar faces. There were a few pictures of him when he was younger here and there at the beginning, followed by Master posing in lots of pictures with many different people.

None of which the dark haired male recognized. Although it was interesting seeing all the different people Master knew and cherished, it didn't lead him anywhere. He wanted to know if who those people were, the people that had brought such a look to her face. Were they anyone he knew? Had they been close to her, then suddenly gone? Was there any way they were connected to either himself or Master? Other questions besides those plagued his mind, and he knew they would continue to unless he found at least one answer. It was strange how curiosity was often linked to other feelings such as nostalgia and safety, or even danger. It intrigued Fukanzen. Human emotions puzzled him, and yet he felt them anyway, even if he wasn't necessarily human. Sometimes he wondered if he was better off without them.

After a scanning over a few more pages and trying to pick out faces that looked even remotely familiar, he was nearly ready to give up. His search wasn't bringing him anything other than frustration, and Master would be back at any given moment. He really didn't want to get caught prying into her personal belongings; the raven haired boy already felt guilty enough for sneaking a look into it behind her back. Nothing else besides more pictures of a number of odd-looking people had shown up, and only a small quantity of them resembled the redhead he'd seen earlier on in the album. Maybe it was nothing he should worry were only a few more pages left in the old album, though. It wouldn't take much time to look through them and clear his mind of those irritating inquiries.

Quickly flipping through the pages and taking mental pictures of the faces he saw littered across each photograph, a sudden tugging sensation filled the pit of his stomach when his eyes paused on one picture. Staring back up at him were two different males, completely different and completely alike in so many ways. One of them was a lot shorter than the other, with green hair that's length was a little past his ear and a shy smile that was half-hidden by his oversized green scarf. His cheeks were a little red like he was blushing, and his emerald eyes and a very soft and welcoming light to them. Beside him was a taller male with bandages in his neck, over one of his eyes, and on his chest from what Fukanzen could see. This one had purple hair and a purple eye, and one of his arms was wrapped protectively around the other's slender shoulders. There was a whisper of a smile on his face, although he wasn't looking directly at the camera. Instead, he was looking at the one with green hair with an unreadable expression, somewhere between fondness and something much more deep and sentimental. Beneath the picture, there were two names written in two colors. Nigaito was written in green, and Taito was written in purple. Although the names themselves weren't specifically a memory trigger, seeing them with a picture of who the names belonged to made Fukanzen's chest tighten up with an unknown feeling. He was unable to describe it, but it almost felt like longing… like they were people he'd seen before and wanted to see again. They were a hazy memory, one that was fluttering in a fragile manner in the back of his mind. Sucking in a shaky breath, Fukanzen hesitantly turned the page. His hands were trembling for some reasons, perhaps from the anticipation of what was to be seen next.

To his great disappointment, his build up of expectations came to a halt and went crashing down. It was just more nameless faces, more people who didn't matter in the least to him. Just when he thought he'd gotten somewhere, there was a dead end preventing him from proceeding in his search. Sure, there were more pictures of others who had irregular hair colors that brought the same feeling as the picture of Nigaito and Taito had… but those weren't what he was looking for. It was great that they made him feel something other than indifference, and that it let his imagination run wild with the possibility of being linked to them somehow, yet that didn't do anything for him other than block off his want to know more for a little while longer. Sooner or later his mind would wander back to those same questions, answers switching back and forth like a pendulum.

Gently closing the album, Fukanzen pushed it away and tried to ignore his disappointment. He shouldn't have expected much out of it anyway. It belonged to Master and held her memories, not his.

A flicker of movement caught his attention, and he saw a small photograph floating to the ground. Snapping his arm out, the young male managed to catch it in the palm of his hand before it got anywhere close to the ground. He handled it delicately, as though he were afraid it would deteriorate in his hand and fade to dust before he had the chance to get a good look at it. Heart hammering explosively against his rib cage, Fukanzen turned it over and stared down intently at the picture. A small gasp flew from his lips and his eyes widened in surprise. His already pounding heart began to flutter excitedly, skipping a beat and making him feel weak. With shaking hands, he held it up closer to make sure his eyes weren't playing tricks on his mind. This couldn't be...there was no way….

Gazing up at him were two males just like in the picture of Nigaito and Taito, but these two made that weight on his chest explode into a thousand shards and pierce into him.

They looked exactly like him. It was like staring down into a mirror where two images met his gaze and didn't phase into one. They both had jet black hair just like his; the only difference was that he himself had a streak of maroon in his hair, the same color as the taller one's scarf. Both of their eyes were red like his, even though there were a few flecks of dark violet in his eyes. There weren't any glitch marks beneath their eyes unlike him, and yet their pale skin matched his perfectly. The smaller one had a black scarf with hands on it and a mask that was tipped to the side of his head so it didn't cover up his grinning face, and the taller male wasn't really smiling at all. Despite the lack of cheerfulness on his face, there was apparent happiness and comfort seen in him. The only difference in the ones in the picture and him were that they were older than him, and they were able to smile without looking like they'd just murdered puppy. Both of them had a creepy appearance and were a lot darker than all the other ones they'd seen, but they also seemed to have a friendly air to them, especially the smaller one. Their names were written on the bottom in red ink, but Fukanzen didn't have to read them in order to instantly know who they were.

Kageito and Zeito Shion.

That was what his last name must be too. Fukanzen Shion. ...So then…. why had Master said his name was Fukanzen Kuragari? It didn't make sense. She wouldn't keep him away from his family, would she? Was there any reason as to why she would? Unless she was afraid of him doing something to them. But he'd never do that! He wouldn't...not ever… Were they his family? They had to be, he didn't want to be alone anymore. There had to be some way he could find our for sure, some way he could contact them or reunite-

"What are you doing?" Master's voice cut like a freshly sharpened knife into his thoughts, her voice shrill and breathy. He whirled around and clutched the picture in his hand, shrinking back at the devastated and enraged expression on her face. She marched over to where he stood glued to the spot and slammed the two glasses of lemonade down on the table with such force that it caused some of the liquid to slosh and and splatter onto the polished wood.

Snatching the album up from Fukanzen's reach, she gripped it like it was the only thing rooting her to the ground. "I said to go through and look at what to keep or throw out, not go through my life," Master seethed, snatching the photo away from the trembling boy and stuffing it inside the album.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" he began, hoping to fix things before they got worse, only to get brushed aside by more angry words.

"Listen, just because you never go out or socialize with others doesn't mean you can do things like this. And just because you don't have a life or a family either means you're allowed to go through mine and fill the holes in yours with it," she snapped, smacking the album down onto the table beside the two cups.

A thick, heavy silence filled the air between them, and Fukanzen was afraid of saying anything without pouring out all his pent up emotions onto her when she didn't deserve it. She was right about it all, but there was one thing that she'd said to trigger his response.

"But… I do have family. I did, anyway. My last name's Shion, right?" Fukanzen asked quietly, his tone a little colder than he'd meant for it to be.

Master's face visibly paled, and the realization of what she'd just said dawned upon her. "Fukanzen, really, I didn't mean….and you do have a family… I just…" she trailed off, looking down at her feet.

Gritting his teeth, and forcing a smile, he replied, "It's okay. It's...it's fine. I'm not exactly normal, so you probably wanted to see how I coped without everyone or if I was a threat." He shrugged his shoulders a little, hiding all his conflicted emotions and acting like it didn't bother him.

"No! I mean...yes. I didn't know if you were bad for them. So I… I removed you. But I was going to take you back, I swear," Master quickly answered, stepping forward and placing a hand on his shoulder.

"When?" was the only response from Fukanzen.

There was more silence. This time, it was enough to answer his question.

Never.

Brushing her hand off his shoulder, his smile vanished and he looked away. She wasn't mad at him for going through the album. She was just devastated that he'd found out about his family when he wasn't ever supposed to go back. He wasn't meant to be part of them. He never would be, and it hurt. It hurt so damn much it made him want to scream.

"Fukanzen...please, don't be like this," Master pleaded, staring at him with teary eyes.

Moving around her, he took hold of another box and opened it, wordlessly taking out the items in there and laying them out for her to go through.

A sigh of relief was heard behind him, along with a murmured, "Thank you."

Fukanzen didn't respond and simply continued on with his work. It was easier to feign indifference than it was to let anyone see how emotionally wrecked he was. There was nobody to blame but himself.

He just wished he could figure out who exactly he was now.