Hi guys! I hope you're doing fine! Here I am with a new story for you. I've actually been thinking about this one for a while, I'd even say from the moment the Clone Wars cartoon started. I always wondered what happened to Ahsoka during Order 66 and even after and when Rebels came out, I was wondering what happened to her betwenn Clone Wars and Rebels. I'm pretty sure we'll know throughout the show at some point, but here are my ideas.

So first I did a bit of maths (and that's not my specialty at all xD) to figure out when Rebels start and what age is Ahsoka in season 2. We know she was born on 36 BBY and that she was 16 years old in season 3 of Clone Wars. At first I thought only ten years happened between CW and Rebels, so I thought Ahsoka was something around 29, 30 maybe. But after calculating her age based on the year the Galactic Empire was created (19 BBY) and knowing Ezra's birth date (also 19 BBY) and age (he's 15) I deduced Rebels takes place during 4 BBY, which means Ahsoka is 32. I hadn't planned she'd be that old, but 32 is still pretty young right? So it didn't bother me that much. Oh and she was 17 when Order 66 happened.

Now that we have the dates out of the way, I'll try to write her adventures, from the moment she left the Order, during this one year before the empire and then during the rebellion, because I think she had a really important role in it, like she was one of the first to rise up in protest. I guess since it's going to cover 15 years of her life, it'll be quite long so hang on tight and here you go! Don't hesitate to fav, follow and review, it's always a pleasure to read you guys. Oh and I also decided to put this story in the Star Wars Rebels because it will cover more elements of it than of CW and because I also didn't want to put it in the crossover category, fearing most of you would miss it (I know I personnaly don't look at the crossover category).

TS

PS: As someone pointed out to me, she wasn't born on 40 BBY like I thought but on 36 BBY, which changes my dates but not what I had in mind for the story. So thanks to that person for making me correct my calculations. Sorry for any confusion this might have made to you.

20 years before the Battle of Yavin

She didn't know where to go first. She had thought her decision through for hours, days even when she was waiting for her trial and it was the most heart breaking decision she had ever taken. She wasn't kidding. She still couldn't believe she'd actually done it. But there was no other way. She was determined not to come back to the Order. At least not for now. She was too hurt, she felt too betrayed to stay and she hated herself for hoping someday her feelings would change. She wasn't angry at any of the Masters, although Master Windu's words had made her frown, but she was disappointed by the council as a whole.

Barriss wasn't her friend anymore and she only felt deception when she thought about the Mirialan, but her former friend was somewhat right: the Jedi Order wasn't the same anymore. Ahsoka had some suspicions; she feared someone else might be behind all Dooku's actions. She had been betrayed by Barriss, she had been betrayed from within so she started to think that maybe the Republic itself was corrupt. She hoped she was wrong and for now, she promised herself not to think about it. For now, all she wanted to do was leave Coruscant, stay somewhere low for a while and only after some time, she thought she could start to investigate. But for now, her emotions clouded her judgment.

There was only one place she had to go before leaving Coruscant. She didn't want to go there at first, just like she didn't want to go to any place the Jedi had activities like Ilum for example. But she couldn't just leave without saying goodbye. She hadn't said much to her Master because if she started to talk, she's end up crying her eyes out and she knew he'd try to stop her. When he followed her out of the counsel room, she had felt all her resolve crumble and she didn't want to sadden him even more.

She was glad though that she had told him she knew about him and Padme. Of course, it was implied, but she was glad that her last words to her Master were meant to show him that she knew all along and that she accepted it, that she wasn't going to reveal her secret. To Ahsoka, it ultimately meant that her bond would never be broken, even if they don't see each other ever again, that she trusted him and knew he trusted her, that she respected him more than anyone else in the galaxy, that she was so proud he had been her Master, even for those few years and that it literally broke her heart to leave. She wasn't sure he got all of that with her two simple words, but they never were closer than when she left him at the temple's entrance. It was almost as if all their secrets had been laid on the table, as if they were both bare, with nothing to hide and nothing more to say than just thank you and goodbye.

She didn't look back at the temple until she was down all the steps. That's only then that she allowed her tears to flow freely and she just stood there crying. After five good minutes, she wiped her tears and rented a speeder to the place of a certain person she admired very much and that was like a sister to her. She knocked on the door and Senator Amidala opened.

"Ahsoka. What are you doing here?"

The senator's voice was soft and slightly surprised, actually Padme was wondering what was Ahsoka doing here because Anakin had told her the council accepted her back. And judging from the wet face of the young Togruta, things didn't go as planned. Without adding another word, the senator let her friend come in and closed the door. She immediately ordered a droid to prepare some tea and biscuits but Ahsoka waved her kind proposition away.

"I won't be staying… I just… came to say goodbye."

Padme froze. She was still wearing the clothes she had when she defended Ahsoka during her trial that happened some three or more hours ago. The Padawan was standing in the middle of the living room, not wanting to sit down on the couch but not willing either to stay by the door. Then Padme noticed that her lightsabers were missing and also her Padawan braid. She also didn't get her comlink back.

"I…" Ahsoka closed her eyes for a brief moment; it was indeed very difficult to say out loud. "I left the Jedi Order. I need to figure things out on my own, without everybody else. Things might change some day… or maybe not. But I can't stay on Coruscant to figure it out."

The Togruta thought the senator deserved some explanation, the same she had given Anakin. Ahsoka was grateful that Padme didn't ask more questions about that matter and hugged her instead. She seemed to have read in her voice that it cost her a lot to do that but that there was no other way. Ahsoka didn't want to leave but she had made up her mind and she was sure that in time, things would be better, she hoped it was only temporary but didn't want to get her hopes up too much in case things don't turn out the way she'd expect them to.

"I see." Padme simply said. "Where will you go?"

Ahsoka crossed her arms on her chest and shrugged her shoulders.

"To tell you the truth, I don't really know. Somewhere the Jedi don't have any ties, somewhere I could think without being disturbed and somewhere I won't attract too much attention. I don't plan on using the Force but my face is not exactly common. A lot of people will recognize me, especially those of the systems where I've been to."

"How about Onderon? And Lux?"

Ahsoka blushed but looked away. She had thought about Lux on Onderon. It was actually the first place that came to her mind when she thought where she could go. But she hadn't talked to Lux in months, the last time it was at Steela's funeral and it hadn't exactly been a great moment. The Togruta knew Lux became the Senator of Onderon and would sit at the Senate, but she had no idea when actually he was on Coruscant or Onderon or even Raxus. Padme answered her silent questions.

"He sits at the Senate but he came back to Onderon for a few days after our last meeting. Maybe you could join him there? It's not so close to our system and you already know the place. Besides, you could easily hide and you have countless allies there."

Ahsoka weighted pros and cons and finally decided the senator was right. They started planning her trip and when Ahsoka decided to completely change her outfit for something more casual even if she really liked her Jedi clothes, Padme insisted to pay for it, as a parting gift. The young Togruta agreed to have a last meal with the senator before boarding a cruiser for Onderon. Padme bid her goodbye at the departing platform, handed her a small suitcase with everything she could need and Ahsoka was moved by the senator's gesture. She could see tears shining in the Padme's eyes and hugged her warmly.

"Take care of yourself, Ahsoka. I will miss you. We all will."

Ahsoka nodded and bit her lips; she wasn't going to cry again. She had talked a lot with Padme during the meal, she had told her everything she would have wanted to tell Anakin, Obi-Wan, Master Plo, even the clones and especially Rex. She hoped a little bit the senator might communicate those things to the different concerned people, because Ahsoka herself didn't have either the courage or the strength to tell them. She just knew that the moment she'd start telling her goodbyes she'd be tempted to stay and that's something she couldn't allow herself to do if she wanted to move on and figure things out.

So she boarded the cruiser for Onderon and went to the back of the ship. She bit her lips and walked out through the back entrance. She checked if Padme or any member of her escort were looking that way and quickly ran to another transport that she boarded without even looking at the planet it was going to. The ship was small and only a dozen people were inside which was perfect. Less people meant a more remote place where she could be alone and avoid being recognized. She paid her ticket with the credits she took. It was a rare thing she didn't throw out.

She hated throwing things away because she had so little as a Jedi, since attachment either to living beings or material objects was forbidden. The only things she had in her possession were some clothes, her usual outfit, her Padawan braid that she had left Anakin and she frowned as she remembered that detail. She sat in the back row and looked through the window as the ship was taking off. She should have taken her braid with her, leaving it to her former Master would only make things more difficult for him. He will have trouble forgetting her. She knew he'd someday have trouble letting her go, she had realized it when the other Masters started talking about it repeatedly but she also figured it out herself when she came back after those Trandoshians hunters captured her. She hoped that by forcing his hand, he'd finally accept it. Knowing him, had she stayed, he would have probably delayed her Knight trials for as long as he could in order to protect her forever.

The other two things she had left were her light sabers. She had lost her shoto when she fled the troopers and her other saber in the warehouse where she fought Barriss. But she got the feeling her Master had found them and kept them as souvenirs. Apart from that, she didn't have much in her room at the temple. She had destroyed her comlink in the lower city during her flight and she had a hologram displayer in her room that showed pictures of her loved ones. She loved it because it reminded her of all the things she had accomplished and all the people she didn't want to forget, a lot of them being fallen troopers. She actually took it and had it in the pocket attached to the back of her belt.

She had enough credits to live for at least three months and she could easily rent a place and even buy a speeder. But she knew she'd have to find a job sooner or later and a job that didn't require her using the Force because that was the best way to be recognized. It was a big change to have to work for herself. Since she was three the Jedi Order had taken care of her. It was also very difficult to realize and accept she could do whatever she wanted, buy whatever she pleased, be with whomever she liked, even intimately. She slightly blushed and looked one last time at Coruscant before the ship left the atmosphere and everything she knew behind. She didn't know why, but she got the feeling she wouldn't be coming back anytime soon.