Disclaimer- I quite obviously don't own Torchwood because if I did... this would be an episode :)
Jack was lying in his bed with Ianto cuddling up next to him. Jack was drunk tired and Ianto was trying to figure out what Jack was talking about.
"I promise that if a nuclear bomb goes off and were both alive, I'll get you a porta potty." Jack said sweetly while Ianto let out a little chuckle.
"Thanks Jack. That's very thoughtful…"
"I promise that if you're shot in the stomach with a rocket launcher, I'll buy you a hot dog." Ianto kissed Jack on the cheek and replies
"I love hot dogs."
"I promise that if your flat burns down, I'll buy you a light bulb." Jack murmured quietly as he tried to get comfortable. "I promise that if a bird pecks your eyeballs out, I'll buy you a chainsaw." Ianto stared back at Jack.
"This is why I love you Jack."
"I promise that if a hoard of gas masked people who are looking for their mummy's start to chase you, I'll get a doctor to fix it."
"Go to sleep Jack before you start to traumatize me…"
A/N- I have a head ache at the moment and I am SO tired… This also started as a conversation I was having with my friend. Also first fan fic I have ever uploaded… I think it was a success J sweet dreams