Disclaimer- Why are we all still writing these things? I think people get the point by now…

A/N- Sequel to Assumptions…some stuff isn't going to make sense if you don't go read it first. Oh, and review it. You have to review it for this one to make sense. Don't judge me...it's sad and I know it.

Oh, and I'll go ahead and keep this decently clean...running bet with a friend. She doesn't think I can write a fic without dropping the f-bomb. Loser! And there also won't be an assload of gay jokes in this...except for that one. ; )

They all, with the exception of Sara, who was at her apartment working on yet another culinary disaster to serve Grissom the next time he was at her place, sat around his townhouse arguing with him.

"You're not going to do it."

"Yes, I will, Catherine."

"No, you won't, Griss," Nick said.

Warrick agreed, "You've been saying this same crap for the last, what is it, six months now. There is no way you're gonna do it this time."

"He sounds serious to me."

"Well, thank you, Greg," Grissom said and gave him a pat on the shoulder.

"Oh, shut up, Greg. The only reason you're even on Grissom's side is because he still has those cards of yours."

"Thanks, Cath. Like I really needed the reminding," Greg said solemnly.

"I'm serious, you guys. I'm going to do this," Grissom sighed.

"I'll gladly turn that into a bet," Nick said.

"And I'll gladly get in on that bet," Catherine said.

"Why don't any of you believe me?"

"Because we all believed you the first seventeen times that you said something about it, and then we just started blocking it out as white noise."

"Am I really that bad?" Grissom asked.

"You're seriously worse than Sara asking if you were gay."

"And that was bad?"

"Yes Grissom, that was bad!"

"Just because I didn't date Sara right away, you people thought I was gay. I still don't get that."

Everyone around the table just stared at him like he was the absolute biggest moron on the face of the earth.

"What?" he asked. "What are those looks for?"

"You're serious?"

"Yeah," he scoffed. "Why would that automatically make you all assume that I was gay?"

"Because Sara is a complete and total goddess!" Greg yelled. "What the hell is the matter with you?!"

"Why are you yelling at me, Greg?" Grissom asked calmly.

"Because you suck!"

"I though we've established that he didn't suck, Greg." Nick laughed at his own joke but no one else did, so he quickly stopped.

"For years she followed you around waiting for you to pay attention to her, and you never did, you silly old bastard! I was there, everyday, to see her falling apart. We all were." Greg pointed around the table to the three nodding heads. "She was in love with you from day one and you didn't give a damn. Bone Lady, Lady Leather, and Sofia…that crap almost did her in."

"Heather," Grissom said.

"What?"

"You said 'Leather'…her name was Heather."

"We call her Lady Leather…its funny because it's true…and because we hate her," Warrick snickered.

"Why would you hate Heather? She's a very nice person."

"She's a bitch!" Greg yelled.

"Watch it, Greg," Grissom warned.

"She stole you from Sara, and it almost broke her."

"I really hurt Sara that much?"

Grissom got some pretty heavy 'DUH!' looks from the other four people in the room.

"Alright! I admit it, I'm an idiot."

"A big one."

Grissom scowled. "Yes, Greg."

"Mega huge."

"Yes, Nick."

"Beyond comparison."

"Yes, Warrick."

"Such a –"

"Jesus, Catherine. I think I got the point!"

"Sorry."

"It's fine…are you all going to help me or are you all just going to go around the lab making spreads and collecting bets on my 'ifs' and 'whens'?"

"Grissom, if you are actually serious this time…one thousand percent serious, then I'm completely behind you," Catherine said and everyone else agreed that they would help.

"Are you sure, Greg? I know that you've always had a thing for her…"

"It was kind of more than just a 'thing' but…yeah. She seems to be happy so whatever." He shrugged. "Grissom…you still have forty six of my cards."

"And?"

"This whole thing with Sara…the proposal. I mean, if I help…you think I can get them all back? Seriously, Judy won't buy me any more."

"I thought Archie said he would?" Nick asked.

"There might have been an incident where I might have taken some coffee into the AV lab and I might have spilled it on some things. I might have," Greg said sadly, while remembering his dear cards.

"Well that explains why Ecklie nearly handed me my ass over a ten thousand dollar repair bill." Grissom gave Greg a death stare.

"I said might have!"

"I hope you appreciate your job, Greg."

"I do! And the rather lovely people that I work with!" he said as he got up from his seat and ran over to Grissom and latched on to him, hugging him hard.

"Get…off…of…me…or…die…you…fool!" Grissom breathed out through the tight hug.

"Sorry." Greg blushed as he let go. "But, yes, I will help with the proposal."

"I really appreciate it, you guys."

"Well Gil…" Catherine started, "…with the way your first date went, I would really hate for that poor girl to have to suffer through a wedding proposal from you."

"That's no lie." Nick laughed loudly, and was actually joined this time.

"Yeah…I foresee…more cops, fire, some type of explosion, a body of water, a desecrated something or other, alcohol…that's a given, Sara crying…also a given, bugs…it would be the worst marriage proposal in the history of the world!" Warrick surmised.

"The date was the worst thing I've ever heard of!" Nick laughed harder.

Grissom groaned, "Please, do not remind me about that!"

"Why not? It was hilarious! We all talk about it everyday at the lab, you know."

"Why?"

"Break from the horrors of death. At first, the only thing we had to laugh at was when Sara called Ecklie a 'kiss ass'…god that was great…but then, you pulled off the absolute best date ever."

"You make fun of me every day?"

"Of course we do, Gil," Catherine said, as if it was the most normal thing to do at the lab.

"I hate you all," he moaned.

"No you don't" Nick said and patted him on the back. "If you hated us, then you wouldn't ask for our help."

"I didn't technically ask for your help. I never said 'please help me ask Sara to marry me so that I don't inadvertently blow up half of Las Vegas in the process.'"

"You said something close enough to it to make it count, Bugman."

"Sure."

"So…"

"What, Catherine?" Grissom sighed…why the hell couldn't she just say what she wanted to say instead of dragging it out?

"Do you have a ring? I want to see it!"

He instantly went bright red.

"Holy shit, he doesn't even have a ring!" Nick yelled

"What is wrong with you?!" Warrick yelled.

"Stupid!" Greg bellowed as his head hit the table.

Catherine hit him on the back of the head "For six damn months all you've been squawking on and on about is how you were going to ask her to marry you, and you didn't even have a ring?! What the hell is your major malfunction, Gil?!"

"I…just-"

"You just nothing! What the hell were you planning on doing? Huh?! Tying a friggin string around the poor girl's finger?"

"I-"

"Don't speak!" Catherine put her hand up to silence him "I need to think!"

Greg, Nick and Warrick just shook their heads at Grissom. How in the world, no, the universe could he possibly be that obtuse? Sure Sara wasn't one for material possessions, but she was surely going to want a ring on her finger! Dumbass…

Five minutes passed by and Grissom was feeling more and more like the whole idea was a bad idea. If he had already screwed up this bad…

"Okay…I've got friends in high places when it comes to jewelry," Catherine said almost smugly. "When were you wanting to propose?"

"Uh…"

"Oh my sweet Jesus, the man doesn't even know that," Greg groaned.

"Well I figured I would know when the time was right," Grissom defended himself

"Oh come off of it man! None of that dopey shit is real! This ain't a movie! You've got to plan things, Griss! P-L-A-N!" Nick said while shaking his head.

"Do you know what size ring she wears?"

"Yes, of course I do! She wears a six…or, or something."

"Or something? Or something?!"

"I think it's a six," he said.

"You shouldn't think, you should know!"

"I know I should! I don't…I believe we've already established that I'm an idiot, can we move on now?!"

"How are you wanting to ask?"

"Uh…'Sara, will you marry me?'"

"That blows ass."

"Well, thanks, Greg. I appreciate your confidence in me."

"No, be romantic."

"Yeah, like Grissom could be romantic!" Nick laughed.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Grissom asked.

Nick stopped laughing "Uh…"

"No, seriously…what's that supposed to mean?"

"Well…your first date for a damn fine example."

"What about it?"

"Most guys use that to impress girls, and you did roller coasters and sandwiches at a crap stand on the outskirts of town. The woman had a bald patch when you got done with her. You don't exactly swoon, Grissom."

"Oh and lets not forget that one and only time you made her dinner at home." Warrick just had to bring that up.

Grissom looked mortified. "She…She told you guys about that?"

"Oh, yeah…she told us alright!" Catherine said, "Hell, based on just that horror fest alone, you owe her some serious fairy tale stuff, Gil."

"I owe her a lot of things for a lot of things. I just don't know how to do any of it."

"She needs to be swept off her feet with this, or she will kill you for it."

"We are going to get through this. We just need to be sneaky."

"What do you mean?" Grissom asked suspiciously.

Catherine smiled deviously. "First things first. Greg…"

I couldn't help it…I loved Assumptions.

Oh…my mom read it yesterday. That was great. She turned and looked at me with this funny look on her face, gave me this motherly kiss on the forehead and seriously asked me 'what happened to you?' ---HA! I must be doing something right if I can make my own mother question where she went wrong with me in life. Anyway, she is actually a fan of my writing and she loved 'A turkey teaser'. She suggested a Valentine's sequel to it…anyone up for it??

Lets me know when you review…because I know you're going to.

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