Wannabe Ninja

It was a normal day at Dante's workplace, and by normal I mean pizza and laziness, when a man sized hole is cut out the brick wall opposite Dante's desk.

"What the hell!" Yells Dante, "Can't you ever use the friggin door!!"

"What do you mean?" Says Vergil calmly as he walks through the hole, sheathing his sword at the same time, "When have I ever done that before?"

"Exhibit A" Dante says, pointing to the wall behind him. In the wall were three holes almost exactly the same as the one Vergil had just cut. "You always have to make a friggin dramatic entrance don't you!? You, You, YOU WANNABE NINJA!!"

"You take that back RIGHT NOW!!" Vergil yells, drawing his sword and leveling the blade at Dante's forehead. "Take it back or so help me I'll, I'll, I'll…"

"Wannabe Ninja, Wannabe Ninja, Wannabe, Wannabe, Wannabe Ninja!!" Laughed Dante as he danced around like Jester did when you shoot at him.

"THAT'S IT!!" Yelled Vergil, visibly annoyed by Dante's name calling. "Let's see how well you dance without a friggin head you…"

But Vergil didn't finish his threat because just then Nero and Credo broke through the roof. Nero landed on his right between the warring twins, Red Queen pointed at Vergil and Blue Rose at Dante. Credo, however, was not so skilled and landed right on top of Dante's desk in his angel form, sending wooden shrapnel flying everywhere, blowing holes in the windows and making dents and pockmarks in the walls, floor and ceiling.

"Great, just great more drama queens! And you!" Dante pointed to the now human Credo, who was now stuck in the floor. "What the hell is wrong with you? You can't even land a jump? Nero I thought you were teaching him how to hunt demons?"

"Your lucky it's just his foot stuck, one time he thought it would be fun to jump head first through the skylight of a 20 story building. He ended up in the lobby floor with his head stuck in the granite floor." Nero said, chuckling at the memory. Dante and Vergil turned to face Credo, who still had his foot stuck in the floor.

"Wow… that's uhh… THAT'S FUNNY AS HELL!!" Dante burst out laughing.

"Shut up!! That was one time!! It hurt like hell!" Credo said still struggling to free his foot from the floor. Dante, Vergil and Nero are all rolling on the floor laughing as Vergil says "Dude I can breathe!"

"Yeah this almost as funny as you being a wannabe ninja!!" wheezes Dante. Instantly the two of them are off of the floor grappling in their demon forms.



"Your dead!" Yells Vergil.

"Kiss my ass Mr. Wannabe Ninja!" Says Dante, still laughing. Nero jumped in between them once more.

"Stop it you guys! Dante, Vergil is not a wannabe ninja!"

"Alright he's not a wannabe ninja he's… TELEPORTING FAT GUY!!"Yells Dante over Nero's head.

"That's it you little turd we're settling this right now!"Yells Vergil. With a swing of Yamato Dante's office was transformed into a swirling vortex.

"Choose your weapon and let's begin!' shouts Vergil from the other side of the Dante's office floor, the only thing left of Dante's office. Credo and Nero were there as well in the same place they were before, which means that Credo's foot was still stuck in the floor.

"What the hell!" said Credo as he looked over the edge of the floor "My foot's gone?!" Meanwhile, Dante and Vergil had Rebellion and Yamato locked and each was trying to gain the upper hand against the other. Finally Dante freed his sword, sending Vergil reeling and sparks flying.

"Hah, you are a wannabe ninja! You just proved it!" Dante teased.

"Shut the hell up you ass!" Vergil shouted as he sprinted across the floor, Yamato poised and ready to strike. In a flash of demonic magic and blood spraying, the twins impaled each other on their devil arms.

"No one's gonna win huh? Dante said, blood dripping from his lip.

"I guess not…" Vergil replied, wincing from pain burning in his stomach.

"Truce?" Dante asked.

"Yeah, but only if you stop calling me a wannabe ninja. Deal?" Vergil said, struggling to keep from blacking out.

"Deal."Dante said. With that the two siblings withdrew their swords from each others abdomen and shook hands. Slowly, the abyss faded and Dante's office returned to normal.

"Great you guys made up, now could you get my foot out of your friggin floor!?" said Credo, who was still battling the floor for possession of his foot. Dante and Nero said nothing as Vergil walked out the door. Nero turned to Dante and said" I don't get it, why just give up you name calling, I mean 'wannabe ninja' is pretty funny."

"I said I wouldn't call him wannabe ninja… but I never said anything about calling him a…

TELEPORTING FAT GUY!

THE END!