They sit together, dipping their feet at the Great Lake. It's late- the kind of hour at which everybody should be asleep in their rooms. The school grounds are serene and quiet, save for the sound of a few crickets, and possibly the giant squid swimming about in the water.
"And that's how Sev and I started out as friends. At a small playground eight years ago," Lily tells him, and she isn't sure why she thinks it's a good idea; just that it takes a huge weight off her shoulders, and she likes the soothing feeling she receives after she does.
He doesn't respond, and continues looking at her as if asking her to go on.
"I know it sounds ridiculous to you. How I've stuck with him for so long. I was bloody defensive about him all the time."
"Yeah..." he says. James knows how much of it is true. He never could place his finger around why she had chosen to be friends with Snivellus of all people. Although he remembers that for the most part, what he felt was jealousy and wounded pride.
"But he was Severus, you know?" she muses, gesturing to everything around her. "He introduced me to all this... And he was so different before we came to Hogwarts. I clung to the thought that he was still my Severus deep inside. That he was putting on a show. I sort of feel responsible for his actions."
James nods, feeling his heart drop slightly when he hears Snivellus being referred to as 'hers'. "I do too with Sirius. I reckon everyone's felt that way about someone at one point. Sirius hates his family." He pauses, thinking about how to phrase his next line of thought.
"The only ones he's got are us, and three teenage boys don't make very responsible parents, do they? Sometimes, I forget that he doesn't have people to stop him from doing stupid things."
She smiles slightly. "I guess now I understand where the mischief and not-taking-things-too-seriously comes from."
"Yeah... it's his way of dealing with things he can't control. Although sometimes, it does get out of hand. There was this prank he pulled on Snape last year, for example, that went horribly wrong."
"I never got to thank you for that, so here." She punches him lightly in the shoulder.
James rubs it exaggeratedly and pretends to look cross. "That's not much of one, and you shouldn't thank me for something that didn't involve you."
Lily doesn't answer immediately, and he knows that she still feels responsible for everything that concerns Snape. Instead, she motions to a familiar tree close by.
"That's where we... you know... stopped talking to each other."
"Yeah... I never got to properly apologize for that, either," James says, still feeling guilty and even ashamed of his behaviour back then.
"Nah. Even if you partly caused it, I think we had it coming for a long time."
"It still doesn't excuse my poor behavior, does it?"
"Oh?" Lily raises her eyebrow, looking at him curiously. "Did the high and mighty James Potter just yield before me?"
"What gives you that idea?" He smirks. "I simply apologized. In no way have I surrendered to the likes of you."
"Yeah... I knew the arrogant part of you couldn't be neglected for longer than ten seconds."
"That's dirty play, Evans!"
"But in all seriousness, I really do think your ego has shrunk and... I forgive you for the stupid things you've done," Lily tells him.
"Thanks, I guess," he says, not knowing how to react. He stares at the ground, hands in pockets, almost unaware of the silly smile on his face.
Lily slaps him in the arm. "Stop it! That smile is killing me."
James quickly rearranges his features. "In a good way, I hope. After all, no woman has ever been able to resist the Potter-"
Lily interrupts him with a chuckle. "Are you blushing, James?
"Am not!" he answers. "What gives you that idea?"
Lily laughs even harder, and he feels increasingly embarrassed the longer she does.
"Stop it. You're injuring my manly pride. And someone might hear you."
Still chuckling, she covers her mouth with her hand. "Sometimes I forget that nobody's supposed to be out here at this hour. We better get inside."
"It's not like anyone will catch us... but you're probably right."
James stands up and offers a hand to Lily, who gladly accepts. He opens the Marauders' map and spreads the Invisibility Cloak over both of them as the pair begin walking towards the castle.
"James?"
"Hmm?"
"Can I ask you something?" Lily says.
"Already have, but go on."
"I've just been slightly curious... why is it that you sometimes call me 'Lily' and 'Evans'?"
"Well, they're your names, aren't they?"
She elbows him. "Git. You know what I mean."
"Fair question. I haven't really thought about it... I think 'Evans' is when I'm feeling particularly playful with you, and 'Lily' is for when I'm really fond of you."
Her brows furrow, and she frowns slightly. "But you call me 'Lily' most of the time."
James raises his eyebrows at her and grins. "Exactly. Any more stupid questions?"
"They aren't stupid."
"But they're weird."
"Just a little. And they're nothing compared to the odder bunch of things you've asked me."
He shrugs. "Fair enough."
Lily mutters the password, and the Fat Lady, half-asleep, crankily admits them.
They settle on the couch, enjoying the comfortable silence for a while. Lily stares into the fireplace, and James watches her, trying to guess her thoughts.
"What are you thinking about?" he asks after a while.
"Funny how things have changed."
"What's changed?"
It takes a bit of time before Lily responds. "In case you haven't noticed, Potter, I hated you a year ago."
"Yeah... I was kind of a prat."
She grins inwardly. "'Kind of' doesn't begin to cover it."
"I did grow out of my childishness," he says.
"Yeah, you did... so have I."
"Really," James says in a half-surprised, half-mocking tone.
"Believe it or not, Potter, you and your odd antics have made me change for the better. I used to be the most close-minded person on the planet."
"Potter now, is it?"
"You have your rules of nameage; I have mine."
"What about now?" he asks her.
"What do you mean?"
"Do you hate me?"
"Still do, a bit."
"Oh."
"Just a bit. I wouldn't be sitting here, talking to you at half past midnight if I didn't like you enough, would I?"
"Guess not." He shrugs, looking unconvinced.
There are some things that Lily won't ever tell anyone—like how she absolutely hates the fact that James, of all people, was the one person who could make her act and feel things that were so against her nature; the one person she had taken in at the cost of Severus. But she doesn't want to say any of that, so she settles for the next best thing.
"You know, the thing I hate about you... is the fact that you were right all this time."
"About what?"
"How brilliant your hair is, for example. I hate being wrong. I hate admitting that I find you really charming and intelligent, but you are."
Then, she realizes how silly and vulnerable her words sound, and she regrets saying them as soon she does. "Oh, Merlin."
A wide, irrepressible grin forms on James's face, and he looks at her swiftly. "Evans thinks my hair is brilliant! Never thought I'd see the day!"
"Shut it."
Then, something must have occurred to him, as James suddenly starts pacing around the room in all seriousness.
"What's on your mind?"
He stops walking and takes a moment to glance at her. "You want to know?"
"Yes."
"You," he answers.
"Oh," she says, unable to stop her cheeks from turning a bright red.
"Go out with me, Lily."
They look at each other for a few seconds; one of them, knowing exactly what to say, while the other is left feeling complete speechless.
"You are never getting tired of this, are you?"
"Don't think so."
Lily wraps her arms around a pillow, seeming to consider things.
"Will you?"
"Maybe," she answers thoughtfully, surprising even herself.
Lily doesn't regret what she says this time, and for now, James knows that her answer is enough.
A/n: Thanks a lot for reading! Apologies if it's a little dramatic. I was browsing at 3 in the morning, and inspiration just struck. Tell me what you think of my writing style, and what needs to be improved!:))
Also, (shameless self-promotion here) read my other work! (Not What It Looks Like). Much Appreciated!
El Padfoot