Judal had loved Kouen, once.
The ginger-haired man was strong, unbelievably so, and, to a weakling magical boy of only twelve years, he seemed like the coolest thing on Earth. He wasn't the most attractive thing alive, but hey, looks aren't everything, and being around him made Judal feel safe.
He had known Kouen since his earliest days, he could remember, and he could recall prancing around the prince in awe and wonder. He had attempted to kiss him, once - it didn't end well, what with Judal being coldly rejected and left with an empty feeling in his dark little heart. When he had begged and pleaded that Kouen tell him why it wasn't him, why he was so disgusted with Judal's affections, he had been surprised at the answer he received.
Kouen was in love with Hakuei. Had been for quite some time. He would someday propose and marry the bluenette girl, and make her his queen. He would always, always love Hakuei - and so Judal moved on.
Judal had loved Sinbad, once.
He was certainly a step up from Kouen - capturing seven Dungeons was no small feet - not to mention he was damn sexy. Eyes like liquid gold, amethyst hair, toned and tanned muscle to spare. From the moment he saw him, Judal was head over heels for his looks, at least. Not to mention that Sinbad was something wild, something amazing, truly one-in-one-million.
It wasn't until a year or so after they'd first met that Judal had decided that it was an actual crush, not just sexual attraction. Then the Magi began to more frequently visit the country of Sindria, under the guise that he was there to destroy the country, kill it's king. Occasionally he would sneak around, not unlike a ninja, in the shadows, trying to catch a glimpse of his precious king. It was on one of these nights that he realized why he couldn't be with Sinbad, either.
Sinbad was in love with Ja'far. Judal had caught the two in a passionate kiss - Sinbad moaning softly, Ja'far's hands deep in his amethyst tresses - and had ran out of the castle and into the wind as something shattered inside of him. It was obvious that someone else had captured the king's heart - and so Judal moved on.
Judal had loved Hakuryuu, once.
Significantly later, he had began to feel strange around the younger boy. Hakuryuu was always someone he felt comfortable around, and he began to grow more a more fond of the bluenette's presence. He had known him since they were both little boys, and it almost seemed meant-to-be, what with them working together to kill Gyokuen.
But he had already known that Hakuryuu belonged to someone else. That Fanalis girl, Morgiana. Hell, Hakuryuu had even proposed to the girl. Any chances Judal might've thought he had with him were shot - but this, time, it had grown far more difficult for Judal to move on.
Because no matter how hard he tried, no matter how much he wanted, he would never be someone's first choice - not like Hakuei, not like Ja'far, not like Morgiana.
He was forever damned to be alone - and so Judal moved on.