Summary: He walks away and she's this close to leaving it with that, but then she's following him out of her office anyway. She wants a confrontation, she thinks she deserves one after all of it. Follow-up to the book fight in 5x06. Short drabble. LP.

AN: Hey! This is just a short drabble, set right after the book fight in 5x06. I love the book fight and while I was listening to Heartbeat by Nneka (where both the title and the lyrics in the beginning are coming from) I felt like writing some sort of follow-up to the fight. I also have another one-shot in the works dealing with kind of the same thing, set between s4 and 5. I guess I just have a lot of anger pent up inside of me right now :P

Anyway, I hope some of you get to like this. Thank you a lot for reading!

Heartbeat

Can you feel my heart is beating
Can you see the pain you're causing

He walks out of her office and though she knows all too well that she should just stay where she is right now, she can't help but follow him. She's mad and she wants to make sure he knows it.

He probably already does, you know, since she was throwing books at him just a minute ago, but still.

She's also hurt and whatever it is between them, she wants it out of the world.

"You can't do this!" She shouts, but she's out of breath and it doesn't come out as strong as she wants it.

He turns around, surprised to find her standing there. He'd thought that after throwing the books at him, she'd be at least calmed down a little.

"Do what?" He stupidly asks.

"You can't expect me to be okay with everything. You gave up on us and now you expect me to be okay with you and your new girlfriend and the fact that you are letting me rent this for free as if we're just friends and everything is great between us. You know it isn't, Lucas!"

"I'm sorry for wanting to be nice to you, Peyton!" He says back, but it sounds more like shouting too and it surprises them both.

This isn't what they want, neither one of them. But as it turns out to be, it's the only thing happening. They're past being nice to each other right now, they both know that too.

"You don't get to be nice now. Not after you broke my heart by leaving me. You caused me so much pain, you don't get to be nice now!" Peyton cries out, tears of anger and hurt and everything else filling her eyes.

He's facing her, his eyes resembling all the same things as hers do, and it only takes them a split second to realize that they both feel the exact same things, the exact same pain. That doesn't mean that things will be any easier, though.

"I broke your heart? What about you broke mine? You think you didn't cause me any pain?" Lucas fires back incredulously. "You said no! Or you didn't say yes, whatever! And now you're back and I have to see you here in town and I am constantly reminded of what has happened and what could have been but never will be and then you think it's easy for me? That I'm fine and that I'm just the bad guy who's causing you pain?"

His words hit her like a brick and she stumbles back, away from him and away from everything he makes her feel. She wants to run and hide, but she knows she can't avoid it. She has set it in motion, she can't run from it now.

She ran after him, wanting a confrontation. A real one, not only throwing books and shouting and then letting him leave. Now, it seems like she has one and she just has to deal with it.

She takes a deep breath and then finally looks up again to where he's standing and it surprises her just how much he can make her feel by just standing there. She's still hurt, like she has been for the past three years, and she's also still mad, but to be fair, she also still cares and worries and most of all, she's also still in love.

"So what now?" She asks then when she thinks they've both calmed down just a little. "We hurt each other. We caused each other pain. What now?"

"I don't know, Peyton. I don't know." He says, locking eyes with her for a second before looking away. "I have to go. Lindsey's waiting."

It breaks her heart to hear that, but she knows she can't do anything anyway so she just nods.

She wanted a confrontation so she tried and she really thought she'd get one, but it seems like they aren't getting any farther than throwing books and accusations at each other.

She's not okay with that, but she'll learn to live with it.