Tales of Free Falling
Summary: A year after Yuri's fall at Zaude, a broken world is putting itself back together and learning to adapt. Now it's Yuri's turn to confront his own mistakes, namely a decision he made in a haze of pain and pride. This time, though, mistakes have their prices and no one involved is getting off easy. Two-shot.
A/N: This is a collaboration project between myself and Legi, known as Salazarfalcon on this site. It's already been posted on her page for awhile so please please please don't tell me I'm copy writing because uh...I'm not.
Also. I normally refrain from warnings like this because I think that people should be mature enough to know where the back button is if they don't like something I write, but I'll do it this once because this is involves a very hot-button character. This fic is not very kind to Sodia; we've both tried our best to avoid bashing but the subject matter itself does not paint her in a very good light. If you're cool with that, I salute you. If not, might I direct you upwards to your handy-dandy back button.
But if you're cool...enjoy!
"Hey, Flynn," Yuri says when Flynn's paid the check and they're getting ready to leave the little cafe in the Lower Quarter, "I need to talk to you."
"I thought that's what we've been doing," Flynn says with a cock of his head and a quizzical eyebrow, "What's going on? You look pretty serious."
Yuri opens the door casually, letting his friend pass through to the winding streets first. He looks up the tiered road towards the Royal Quarter and the ever present castle. He'd never thought too highly of the castle until recently; it was always a place that he had held in contempt. Not without reason either. It was surrounded by the Royal Quarter where people had their heads so high they probably didn't know what color the grass was, and they were always so focused on themselves that he figured they probably didn't know what color the sky was either. The jail was in the dungeon of the castle, and that was never a place he enjoyed staying (even if he never really regretted anything he did to get himself thrown in there).
But then, his epic journey began with a happenstance meeting with a quirky princess.
Now the castle was something important to him. It was the place where he had had a major turning point in his life and it was now home to two of his best friends. It was a place he had witnessed and done things he never could have imagined (both good and bad) from being attacked by that crazy assassin Zagi after his fateful meeting with Estelle, to Alexei almost destroying all of Zaphias and uncovering the Shrine of Zaude.
Zaude. That was the whole reason he had come back to Zaphias this time.
Yuri gives his friend a sideways glance and realizes that the blond has his 'what the hell is going on with you?' face. Flynn is too damned perceptive for his own good. Yuri thought that he had said 'let's talk' innocently enough, but he should have known better. There was never, ever anything getting past Flynn Scifo when it came to Yuri Lowell.
Cracking his usual mischievous smirk to try and ease up his friend's obvious suspicions, Yuri points up the road."Let's head back to the castle first. I want to see how ridiculously big your new office is, Commandant."
Flynn furrows his already furrowed brows further.
"Well...all right, then," he replies with a note of blatant suspicion in his voice. Yuri grins at him, a crooked little half grin that doesn't make Flynn feel any better or lessen the suspicion in the slightest. "My office isn't that big. I almost miss the old one; it was...homier, you know?" Anyone else would be lying but Flynn's actually be honest about it; the office might be bigger but he doesn't really need it. The bigger chair is nice, though.
The streets are warm and familiar and people still greet them when they pass, and Flynn waves and grins with the best of them. He might be a knight, a captain, a commandant, a hero, but this place is still home and he'll never forget it. These are his people and he knows them, and he saw many of them grow up and many of them saw him grow up. It doesn't matter how high his rank gets, he won't ever forget where he comes from. Sometimes, that's the only thing that makes the position worth it because he can do it now; he can make his voice heard for those people who don't have one and who aren't used to being heard.
Estelle hears them and that's something that's still new to everyone.
As they walk, something fidgets underneath his skin, like a dread as heavy as a brand.
And not for the first time, Flynn Scifo worries.
Hoping to break the awkward silence and distract his friend with small talk, Yuri puts his hands in his pockets and glances around at the buildings, a small hint of nostalgia on his face. "Man, it feels like I haven't been back here in ages."
In truth it hadn't really been that long; a solid two months since his last job had given him the opportunity to take a side trip to the capital for a day, but each time he has come back since permanently taking up residence in Dahngrest, Yuri has found himself seeing things he never noticed before. Like how all the buildings in the Lower Quarter were more welcoming, more homey, than the mansions in the upper ring, despite being sun washed and more than slightly dilapidated. When he had lived there, all the Lower Quarter really was was a place to sleep, eat, and try to figure out how to make it through the next day in a similar manner.
He's also started to miss seeing the old familiar faces like Hanks, Rick, and that guy who always hangs out at the bottom of the stairwell to his room whose name he still doesn't know. Dahngrest has its own familiar faces, but it's different.
What was it that the old man said before Yuri left? Home is home no matter where you end up. It was kind of disgustingly wistful, but this, like with most things Raven says, Yuri finds himself agreeing with despite the gross feeling that maybe he too was getting old.
"It has been a while," Flynn agrees. "Seems like your guild is going well, though." He forces his way through the tension to give Yuri a side-eye and continues, "I've noticed that Estelle keeps hiring Brave Vesperia on for small jobs to get you back here more often. Bet her account's through the roof."
Like Yuri's going to make her pay up, ever. The sky will be green and polka-dotted first.
"Yeah, I could live in the lap of luxury for two lifetimes." Yuri rolls his eyes and flips his bangs out of his face, looking every direction but Flynn's as they march through the ritzy Royal Quarter towards the castle. He could never feel comfortable walking though here, even if he was with Estelle or Flynn. "Or, you know, start fixing up our headquarters like Karol's wanted since we bought it five months ago. He's even got the old man to join in his cause. I think their goal is to annoy me into doing it."
Flynn snickers and they arrive at the castle, and the guards at the doors pay them no mind as they push them open. This job doesn't always pay but it pays for this, to not be given suspicious glances every time he comes near. Yuri either, though Flynn would bet that a good number of people would like to toss him in jail (again) just for being himself. Yuri's a good guy and a (very reluctant) hero but that doesn't mean that he doesn't deserve some (or a little more than some, if Flynn has to be completely honest) of the enmity he gets around here. "I'm sure that if you asked, she'd front the costs for something like that."
Yuri won't ask, he knows, but it's too much fun to not mess with him a little.
"Oh come on, Flynn, you know I can't ask her to do something like that. She'd actually do it and then I would owe her!" Yuri throws his best playful glare at the blond as they turn down the hall towards the military offices, but falls silent for the rest of the short trek to Flynn's office. He hadn't seen Flynn's new office since they refurbished the military halls after Alexei took over and forced chaos upon the city in the form of over grown plants and berserk monsters. The castle looked about as good as the buildings in the Lower Quarter did on a good day; and that wasn't saying much. After everything had cooled down, both Estelle and Ioder decided that fixing up the city first was more important than fixing up the castle so things were only just getting finished up.
Rocking on the balls of his feet as he waits for his friend to unlock the large oak door to his office, Yuri nods to a passing knight who only reciprocates with a glare. Yeah, he still didn't have many friends in the castle and that probably wasn't going to change anytime soon.
Hearing the key click, Yuri takes a quick sharp breath. Sure, now he's starting to feel the tension in his chest. He had been doing so well keeping it at bay. He prepared for this; the entire way from Dahngrest he had rehearsed what he was going to say over and over. What he was going to say and how he was going to say it all. He wouldn't be angry, he wouldn't be scared, he wouldn't be too detailed or too vague.
He really didn't want to do this.
The door swings open and Yuri whistles as he takes a step inside to look around the newly refurbished room. He raises an eyebrow at Flynn who's standing next to a closet large enough to fit double of everything Yuri owned in it.
"What is your definition of not big?"
His eyes go from the double bay windows across the three consecutive (completely full) bookshelves, only to fall on the large oak desk that could sit four people comfortably. He eyes the disturbingly large pile of papers at the end of the desk and cracks a grin as he points to it.
"Though I suppose this is the reason for the giant dining room table posing as your desk?"
Flynn groans and resists the urge to drop his forehead into his palm.
Not here, not while the door's open and someone could walk by and see. So he closes the door, problem solved.
Then he drops his forehead into his palm.
"It's a hell of a lot more paperwork, that's for sure." Flynn doesn't go into the details because that will lead to a rambling rant that will likely go on until they need to eat again, and since they're in the Upper Quarter, Yuri'll want to eat somewhere expensive. Not that it much matters, but he needs to complain anyway because he can and it's his duty as Long Suffering Best Friend. It's expected of him.
He considers sitting down but decides against it, settling instead with his hip resting against the edge of bookcase.
"So, what's going on?"
Leave it to Flynn to get right to the point. Yuri crosses his arms over his chest and leans casually against the edge of the desk, crossing one foot in front of the other while still trying to keep a nonchalant air around him (which he knew he was failing miserably at doing). It was now or never; he had come all this way to get this over with. So it would stop keeping him up at night. So it would stop making him worry about Flynn. So it would stop him from drowning in this lie he had been living in since it happened.
His voice lowers and his eyes narrow as he looks directly at Flynn, something that took all his might to do. "We...need to talk about something."
Ok, admittedly not the most eloquent way to start off the conversation, but Yuri suddenly finds himself panicking. He didn't want to do this to his best friend. He didn't want to hurt him or make him angry and that is exactly what he had traveled all the way from Dahngrest to do.
Flynn goes a little bit cold, because there's still something inside him that's screaming wrong, wrong, wrong. He knows Yuri (a little too well, sometimes) and the guy's got his tells and right now he's showing all of them. He doesn't want to know what can make Yuri scared like this, and what it would have to do with him.
"Oh, dear. Is this our breakup talk?" he asks with a flippant, anxious laugh. Flynn locks a knee behind him and wants Yuri to laugh along, joke like he wants. If he can joke, it means that Flynn's wrong and Flynn so very desperately wants to be wrong.
Nothing ever goes well when Yuri sounds this serious.
Yuri for his part makes it very obvious he is not in the mood to joke. He starts playing along now and he'll never muster up the courage for this conversation again. Lips pursed, he takes a deep breath before starting slowly.
"Do you remember the days after Zaude?" He pauses a moment and continues before Flynn can answer with a 'you're joking, right?', "You told me you had looked for me for a week before you had to call it quits. Before you sent everyone off to move on; to do what they needed to do, to keep working towards fixing things with the Adephagos."
Oh, does Flynn remember.
"Yeah, of course I do; how could I forget? I only had the entire blasted military looking for you."
Not only had Flynn been terrified of Yuri's death (and then furious, and then resigned, and then angry again) but those days were the first most of his men had ever seen of his own bad temper, and they'd been tiptoeing around him for months afterwards. He remembers how he couldn't settle down and how Estelle worked herself into the ground day and night until he and Judith tag-teamed her into stopping. Guilted, he remembers with a flinch because it might have well been what Yuri would have wanted had he actually been dead, but it was what it was and Flynn can't deny playing off of Estelle's sense of shame a little if it will keep her safe.
"Seriously, Yuri, I'm worried now. Tell me what's going on."
Waving a casual hand in the air as if shooing away a fly, Yuri has to look away from Flynn as his stomach rolls into a knot. He feels like he's going to be sick; maybe he should have eaten a lighter lunch.
"Well, when we finally met up again, I…I might not have told you the entire story. I told you I fell and was out of it for a little from being banged up a bit." He looks back at his friend; nothing readable on his face. "I lied, Flynn. I should have died and I came damn close to doing so."
He can't help but flinch as he watches Flynn go pale, but still, so far so good. Flynn hasn't punched him and he hasn't let any of the thickening emotion inside him stir things up…yet. Both were still very likely to happen.
The sick cold that's made its home in Flynn's gut stirs. He feels a little bit lightheaded, as if he's on a mountaintop instead of his office in the capital. He takes a breath that's too shallow and that does absolutely nothing for him.
The blonde commandant takes a step forward, another, and then another until he's standing in front of his friend. They're about the same height, though Yuri's a little taller by a hair and Flynn's got more muscle to him.
"Are you..." he begins and then changes his mind, "Why are you telling me this? Quit being cryptic, you bastard." He rakes a hand through his hair and wishes that they were fighting instead of talking.
He's always had an instinct for change, an instinct for the big things coming.
Something's coming.
"I'm telling you this because I can't keep it a secret anymore." Yuri says in that deep tone he only uses when he's beyond serious. "I'm tired of having this hanging over my head and I'm tired of worrying about what could happen if I kept this to myself. Worried about what could happen to you."
Taking a deep breath Yuri closes his eyes for a second. He was not going to puke all over his best friend's brand new office. That would be embarrassing, not to mention it would just add to the list of reasons that Flynn was about to throw him out the window. He had promised himself he wouldn't get worked up over this. He wasn't going to let it over take him like it had so many times since it happened. A reoccurring nightmare here or there, a faint twinge to remind him that he wasn't all whole anymore; just a simple slip of the memory and the Yuri Lowell who always had everything together would nearly fall apart.
Seeing the blonde's cheeks flush, Yuri pushes back against the desk to try and widen the space between him and the commandant. Dammit, Flynn could be intimidating without even trying. "Flynn, just…"
No, no more beating around the bush. Just get this over with.
"I wasn't lying about falling off the shrine. That happened and its true, I wasn't able to tell anyone I was okay until Estelle found me a week later, but it was no accident that I took that free fall in the first place."
Flynn's eyes narrow further. "Alexei?"
"No." Yuri shakes his head. He wishes it was that easy of an answer. "I wasn't pushed, but I still had help finding the edge. I— ugh."
Running a hand through his hair Yuri lets out an exasperated sigh. So much for the words he had rehearsed. His mind was running so fast he didn't know where to go next. Should he start from the beginning or just jump to the point?
Oh, to hell with this.
Reaching down Yuri gathers the bottom hem of his shirt and lifts it up to just above his hips and turns to his left to face the sun. He turns his head and stares out the window as he hears his friend move in closer with a clink of armor. Again, not the most articulate way to tell Flynn, but it would have just as much of an impact as his words would have; and with this he wouldn't have to worry about that shaking in his body to come out in his voice right away.
Flynn leans forward and looks, and sees a scar unlike the normal scuffs that he already knows and the scrape of monster claws. This one isn't white with age, not yet, still pink and raised and deep. Flynn's stomach roils.
That's a stab wound, he knows too well, and finds himself unable to look away from it.
Yuri sure as hell didn't get that from the building.
That's new.
Dragging in a breath, Flynn reaches out a hand and brushes the scar with his fingertips too gently to hurt. Yuri flinches anyway. It's been healed, he knows; Yuri moves too well for it to be anything otherwise, but it might still ache. Flynn suddenly wonders who did the healing; it's been done well, probably a master. Estelle?
"Who did this to you, Yuri?" Flynn doesn't ask so much as demands, and the worry turns to the beginnings of a righteous rage. This is wrong. This is wrong. This is wrong.
Yuri flinches as Flynn's fingers brush across his side. "Damn, your hands are cold!"
"Yuri!" Flynn says quickly, severely. His blue eyes snap up to meet dark ones. The commandant's finished joking. "Who?"
"Do the math, Flynn!" Yuri says, much angrier than he intends as he lets his shirt fall out of his hands, back down despite the fact that Flynn was still inspecting the scar. "How many people did you have to rescue off of that roof? Eight, right? One dead ex-commandant, a princess, three guild members, a mage, Repede, and-"
Yuri lowers his voice so that all the fury is out of it; Flynn didn't need to hear that. Not here, not now, not when this was going to tear his best friend apart. "And Captain Sodia."
Flynn doesn't want to believe it. His hand drops and he realizes, distantly, like it's not a part of him, that he's beginning to tremble. He doesn't want to believe it.
This can't be right.
He trusts Sodia. He cares about Sodia. She's his friend and his comrade and someone whose never let him down, always supportive and loyal and there. She's always supported him and his ideas and methods, an ally that he could always count on. That she could possibly do something like this...it's almost unthinkable.
He raises his head and looks Yuri in the eyes; the other man is all too serious, without a drop of mirth or hint that this is a horrible joke.
This is a joke, it has to be. Yuri will crack a smirk and say he's kidding, and Flynn will rip him a new one for scaring him like this.
Except that it's not a joke at all and no one's laughing, especially not Flynn. His jaw aches from clenching his teeth. Everything is so sharp, the lights, the sounds. He can see the nervous twitching of Yuri's hands.
"You're going to tell me how this happened. Right here. Right now." Flynn's voice doesn't sound like his. It sounds far away and like someone he doesn't know, because his best friend and brother has been hurt by someone Flynn trusts. Indirectly, this is on him. "Talk."
With a simple nod Yuri straightens his posture, pushing himself off of the desk despite his pounding heart making his head spin. He had to be strong doing this and not only for himself. If Flynn sees how much this rattles him it would only make this whole thing worse.
A sudden calm overtakes Yuri and his voice deepens again as he starts recapping his story in a practiced rhythm.
"After our battle with Alexei we realized that, with the Adephagos free, the Apatheia that was keeping the barrier up was going to come down. Everything was crumbling and the blastia was dropping fast." Seeing Flynn raise an eyebrow, he throws his hands up to stop his friend before he can say anything. "I know you've heard this part before, but just bear with me. Alexei was a lost cause, I ran and the blastia fell right on top of him, but in doing so I got separated from the rest of the group. Everyone figured that's when I fell off of the roof and I stood by that assumption because it was an easy excuse, but…it wasn't the truth."
And then it all comes crashing back to him, sweeping away the calm he had found like the fury of a tidal wave washing away a beach. All his thoughts come back; how he had thought a thousand things in the thirty seconds before consciousness had left him. That he was going to die before he had reached his goals, before the world could be saved. That he had been done in by the hands of someone that would be standing by his best friend's side playing the part of an honorable person. How Estelle would be so disappointed in him and that Karol would raise their guild to fame without him. He thought about how he hadn't nearly punished Raven enough for trying to throw away his life and about how much Judy had changed since he had first met her. Hell, he had even thought about Rita and how she would smack him a good one for hurting Estelle and everyone.
He had thought about the way he had submitted to his death the second his feet left the platform. The way he had been so confused at the initial shock of pain; thinking that it was still Flynn before his eyes fell onto red hair and green eyes. How he had woken up back in his room so incredibly confused and pained and, well, alone.
He had faced death before; quite a few times to date, but he always had his friends right there. When he was in the knights he had Flynn, his unit and his captain backing him up. When they almost died in the Sands of Kogor, he'd had Estelle, Karol, Judy…everyone was there, but on top of Zaude he had been alone. Sure, his group hadn't been very far away; just on the other side of the largest apatheia he had ever seen, but he couldn't see them or hear them. They couldn't hear his shout of surprise and he knew they would have no idea what had happened to him. It had scared him more than anything.
Realizing that all his mental preparation on the trip from Dahngrest was useless, Yuri clenches his fists. He is losing this battle with his memories and emotions. There's no denying that he had been kidding himself when he thought he was okay with it all. He was great at covering this stuff up. He could talk about Zaude and what happened in its lie form like he was at an informal dinner party, but now that he was trying to spill the truth, it felt like he was going to tear apart at the seams.
Becoming aware that he's let a stretch of silence stand a little too long, Yuri takes a small breath and continues, "By the time I had picked myself up and figured what was happening I realized I had been separated, but then I heard armor and I thought maybe you had somehow made it up to the roof. I turned around and before I could even see who it was there was a dagger in my stomach." Pausing, dark eyes fall to stare at shaking hands. Yuri's voice quiets, usually unheard emotion melts through every word; all resolve lost. "She pulled back and there was the sound of metal hitting the floor, but all I could register was that I was falling through the air. That's the last I remember before I woke up in the Lower Quarter a week later. When Estelle had met up with me here I had only just woken up about a half hour before. She healed me, but I never showed her the entirety of my injuries. Probably why that scar is so damn noticeable."
Flynn can't take another word, not one more. He moves, taking a final step forward and burying his hands in Yuri's collar and dragging him close until their noses touch.
He's gone white as a sheet except for two matching spots of color high on his cheekbones, and his nostrils flare.
"How could you?" he snarls, unsure of who exactly he's more angry at right now. He gives Yuri a couple of short shakes and wishes it were simpler and that they could just duke it out in the training yard like they always do when someone's angry. But that won't help, not with this. "How could you just stay quiet about this? How dare you stay quiet about this?" Flynn hears his voice pitch but he doesn't try and stop it; anyone who hears him now deserves to. "What the hell, Yuri?! Were you trying to be kind and spare me from something, when you're the one who almost-" he drags his eyes away from the scar, "Spirits. Do you think it doesn't matter?!"
Flynn wants to throw something.
Yuri thought that it was him. For a split second, he thought that it was Flynn sending a knife into him and the thought cuts him just like a dagger. Yuri thought that Flynn had done it. It didn't matter how long that thought had lasted or how soon he was able to look up and see that it wasn't; for that moment, Yuri must have been sure that it been Flynn who had done him in.
Flynn's angry and hurt and seething with something that tastes like guilt.
He hates that it fits, he hates that it's true. It can't be anything but true, not the way the timing works, not the way that Yuri's skin doesn't lie to him (unlike everyone else, apparently), and the way that he knows, for the first time (why couldn't he see sooner?) that the one person in the knights that he could trust to have his back hated someone enough to do this.
Hates someone who's saved Flynn more times than he can count enough to try and kill him.
And then lie about it.
No, Flynn thinks, not lying. Worse than lying. She didn't lie, she said nothing. She looked him in the eyes and knew exactly what she'd done, and didn't say a word.
And Yuri let her.
Yuri lets his friend shake him and doesn't try to push away or back up or interrupt. He knows he deserves the full front of Flynn's anger. Hell, Yuri was angry with himself. He just tore everything Flynn knew about himself and someone he trusts dearly apart and spat it in his face in every negative way possible.
While Sodia was never on top of his own friends list he knows that she's someone Flynn really cares about. She was his assistant, loyal companion, and brace during his pilgrimage, during the whole Adephagos ordeal for that matter. She had been through things and seen things with him that Yuri hadn't and through those experiences he saw them form a deep bond; not only as commander and soldier, but as friends. He respects that and the last thing he wants to do is shatter it. But he can't ignore what happened any longer.
He wasn't doing this because she tried to kill him. Honestly, he doesn't really blame her for it; he's not exactly an endearing person. Plus she didn't meet him at his most personable moments. He can't blame her for disliking him. In fact, at first he found that resolve to be admirable. She cared about Flynn enough to try and kill him so that he wouldn't taint Flynn's reputation. It showed Yuri a fierce loyalty that he was all too familiar with, but after time had passed and he thought about it. He watched her in the months when the world was picking itself back up from the brink of destruction that he began to realize that he made a very bad judgment call. He still couldn't blame her for the attempt; never would.
What he can blame her for is lying to Flynn and that is exactly why he came here. He had given her a chance to talk about it with Flynn; to take up the role he was leaving vacant for her and she didn't take it. She whisked away her actions under the bed to be forgotten about and never uncovered. If she was angry enough to try and kill him and then lie about it to Flynn, who's to say she won't turn on him one day? Who's to say she won't turn around and start doing things behind his back and keep lying about it all after she's had so much practice? She could become everything Flynn was fighting so hard to eliminate. Yuri realized she could become just like him and that was the last thing Flynn needed by his side. Yuri had tried to isolate himself as much as he could from Flynn, but there was no getting away. Sodia wouldn't need an excuse to leave; she could stand by his side and damage everything Flynn had worked for so easily. Yuri was not about to let that happen, no matter the cost.
He waits until he is sure the commandant is finished rag dolling him for the moment before talking. "The next time I saw you, things were hectic and I know that's not an excuse. I know, Flynn." Yuri hears his voice waver with a sudden rush of anger. He doesn't know where it comes from, but he can't stop it either. "I wanted to tell you. Do you think I didn't want retribution? But at that time I didn't deserve it and she deserved the chance to make things right for herself. I decided to give her the chance to confess, but it wasn't because I was being nice or anything. I wanted her to talk to you; to become the person I could never be; to be the positive light at your side, instead of my… damaging reputation. I have to be honest; she cares about you enough to try and get me out of the picture so I would stop holding you back. That's not something you can find in many people, especially in knights, but I also thought she was loyal enough to make things right in the end. To not lie to you or hide things behind your back. So I kept my mouth shut hoping she would do the right thing." He closes his eyes and lets out a hollow snort. "And I honestly thought she would. I thought she respected you enough, but apparently, I was wrong."
Reaching up Yuri takes Flynn's hand into his own and pries the white knuckled fingers from his collar. "I guess I'm not as good at judging people's characters as I thought."
"You- You stupid moron," Flynn sputters but doesn't pull his hand away, instead giving a twist of the wrist and squeezing. Now that he knows, it's even worse, because he's always taken Yuri's warmth and heartbeat for granted and that was almost taken from him.
It makes him sick and only makes the itch under his skin worse.
The words aren't enough to take away the rage but they're enough to defuse him enough to the point that he's not seeing spots on the edges of his vision.
Now he's just cold.
The anger he feels towards Yuri burns hot and violent and Flynn's not sure now whether he wants to hug him or throw him out a window.
He hugs him now and saves tossing him out a window for later, ignoring Yuri's grunt of surprise.
"You stupid, stupid moron."
He pulls away and tries to gather himself to rights, straightening hair that's been mussed by anxious hands. He imagines taking everything that he thought he knew, imagines it laying out on the floor, and imagines sweeping it up into a box. It's how he deals with a lot of things and it's how he deals with being angry at Yuri now, because if he's burning hot he won't be able to do properly what he has to do now.
Satisfied with his own appearance of composure, Flynn walks around to the other side of his desk, taking his sword and attaching it to his belt as well as trading his normal commandant's jacket for the more formal ceremonial one, the one with all the shiny bells and whistles that he doesn't really care about. He doesn't like wearing it; it's too stuffy and reminds him of all the things he never liked about the Empire.
It's too shiny for him, too tight and too strong and screams rank in a way he doesn't like.
It's what he needs right now.
"Stay here," he orders. "Just-stay here. Or go. I don't know. I need to deal with something."
The pomp and shine are exactly what he needs, more effective than any shield.
Awkward hugging over with, Yuri watches as his friend puts on his jacket and finds himself suddenly staring at the floor. He knows what Flynn's going to do and it rattles him to the core. He is the reason Flynn is so angry and confused and hurt right now. He is going to be the reason that an honestly good knight is about to face judgment for a crime he can't really blame her for.
But she already betrayed Flynn once and he wasn't going to let her do it again. Even if it meant him tasting this guilt like ferric blood for the next year; he did what he needed to do and at this point, there was no taking it back.
Yuri clenches his jaw to bite back his initial thoughts and settles on nodding slowly as the commandant straightens out his belt.
"For what it's worth, I am sorry, Flynn. I really didn't want things to turn out this way. I made a mistake in covering this up and waiting far too long to tell you." He stands up straight and opens the door putting a hand in the air. "We'll talk more later, I'm returning to the Lower Quarter."
And hiding.
"Yeah," Flynn manages, "We'll talk later."
For a while after he's left alone, all he can do is breathe. He's never had to do this. All this time, he's thought that if he was going to have a serious problem with someone, it would be a higher up and in his experience so far, that's how it's been. Flynn's prided himself on getting to know the people under his command, to know them as people as well as soldiers. He thought they would believe, as he believes, in the change he wants to make. He's never had to do this and he doesn't want to.
That he has to do this now to Sodia, a friend, a knight, an almost-captain, hurts like he could have never imagined.
He can't think with that now, though, not with hurt. That's not what a leader does. What she did hurts on a personal level, yes. Spirits, yes.
That's not all, though.
She's lied to her commander, attempted murder on a civilian, and all for...honestly, Flynn doesn't even know why. He can't even fathom the reason she must have thought she had to doing such a thing.
But he'll find out, though. It won't change the outcome or his mind, but maybe if he knows why, it'll hurt less.
He's waited too long already to do what he needs to do and his office isn't getting any smaller and he's not getting any more confident the longer he waits, just more upset.
It's with those thoughts that Flynn exits his office and walks through the halls and outside into the sunlight. He knows where she is at this time of day, and he's not cruel enough to do this if there's an audience in the training yards.
Sodia knows long before she turns around that the commandant is coming. It starts with the newer recruits freezing dead in the middle of their practice swings and follows with them flailing in place, unsure of whether they should stand at attention or salute or just run away. They look to her for guidance and she has to suppress a chuckle remembering how she felt the same way when she was first training. When she had first met Commandant Alexei and when she had first met Flynn.
Usually Flynn comes into the yard and watches for a little. Then he'll comment, give pointers, and help out soldiers as he crosses back and forth. He would even spare with them from time to time. It was something she truly admired him for; Alexei never took the time to watch trainee's practice, let alone teach them himself. Flynn cared enough to get to know those he commanded; it was what had drawn her to him in the first place. Waving to the trainees to continue with their practice she turns to face the only entrance and exit to the training ground and freezes.
She doesn't need any orders to know what Flynn wants. He stands at the gate, not a step further and waits for her to start walking across the courtyard before turning on his heel and marching away, his right hand resting on the hilt of his sword. His blue eyes are fiercer than she has ever seen them and the last time he was decked out in his ceremonial attire was at the treaty signing with the newly reformed Guild Union. He hates that jacket with a passion and never wears it unless he absolutely needs to.
This did not bode well. Flynn was fuming.
Flynn never gets angry. She's seen him grumpy, annoyed perhaps, but never flat out angry. The most she had ever seen of his temper was during the Adephagos ordeal when he was dealing with his 'friend', Yuri Lowell's, death. Well, not so death, but they didn't know that at the time. That had been infuriating to watch in itself. Flynn had nearly torn himself up over it all and that raven haired guildite didn't deserve an ounce of any of her commander's time or emotion.
Watching him from behind, Sodia's innards slowly begin twisting into knots and a shiver rests at the bottom of her spine, waiting. Perhaps angry was being nice; his shoulders were tense and his steps were stiff, his free hand is clenched in a fist that is so tight it looks painful. No, he's not just mad, Commandant Scifo is livid.
The worst part is that she looks so confused, following after him after snapping off a quick salute. Like she has no idea why he might be angry. Flynn walks until he can only barely hear the shouts of the recruits and the clatter of their practice. If he's played his cards right (and he has, this time, he has to have), they'll be out of earshot and even if they weren't, their noise would cover up any words of his.
Flynn Scifo has no intention of shouting.
He doesn't need to, not for this.
"Sodia," he begins, barely managing to keep from flinching when the girl watches him attentively, trying to gauge what he could want from her. So many times, that attentiveness had saved lives. Now he's going to have to ruin hers. "You've been under my command for a while, now. You've always shown loyalty to me and to my causes. You've been a friend and a comrade and I would never take that back." He looks her in the eyes and holds steady. "But I need you to be honest with me now."
He pauses and finds the space to breathe.
Oh, he's angry. He hurts too but right now, it's everything he has to keep the rage out of his voice, to keep his fisted hand from trembling, to keep from screaming. He sounds calm, so calm, and he wonders when he learned to do that. Flynn doesn't do stone-cold, doesn't do stoic, doesn't do the hard edges and biting words that others manage with ease, but he does now.
"The night Zaude fell and the Adephagos was released...tell me what happened." Flynn releases his grip on his sword and lets both arms rest at his sides.
And then he waits, silent and absolutely still.
Sodia can't hide her shock at the question. Why was he asking about this all of a sudden? The incident at Zaude happened almost a year ago now and all the details and experiences there have already been summed up and stored away in the archives. Well, almost all of them.
The knots in her stomach suddenly tighten and Sodia feels a lump in her throat. Flynn had lunch with Yuri today; he couldn't be asking about… no Yuri said he wasn't going to tell Flynn. He had left it up to her and she made her choice. It was the right choice— Flynn didn't need to know what happened up on Zaude. It would only confuse him and hurt him. She kept quiet so he didn't have to worry; because he would. He would worry about Yuri more than anything; if his friend was still injured, if he had any lingering feeling about the incident. Then he would worry about her. Worry if he had done anything to drive her actions and he would feel guilty for making her angry enough to try and kill Yuri. Then he would have to choose between her and Yuri and he would not choose her. She wasn't going to put that over him. She wasn't going to force him to make such a choice. It wasn't the right thing for a friend to do. Yuri knew this, which is why he never told Flynn.
But Sodia doesn't know if that's what the commandant was referring to right now. It was unlikely, she told herself. She may hate Yuri Lowell with every fiber of her being, but she still knows him well enough to know he keeps his word when he gives it.
"I'm not going to tell anyone." He had said with that look in his eyes; the look that screamed of plots and revenge, but also honesty and resolve. "But don't think I'm letting you get away with this."
Seeing that she was making Flynn wait, Sodia stands at attention straight up, arms rigid at her sides, voice neutral and hardened with a military beat. "After you had been injured I followed the princess' group and former Commandant Alexei up to the roof. I arrived at the very end of their battle together and saw Yuri Lowell engaging Alexei alone while Alexei was activating the system on Zaude to release the Adephagos. I admit that I hesitated when the shrine activated and the apatheia in the air came down. Alexei was killed instantly and the princess' group scattered to avoid the debris. Once the dust settled I made sure everyone was all right before trying to formulate a plan for getting off of the roof since the fallen blastia had damaged the lift mechanism. There were no injuries to the civilians, but Yuri Lowell had gone missing."
Sodia looks over the commandant trying to read him. She has become very good at picking out his tells and signs, but right now she couldn't see anything. He was completely still, completely stoic, and completely unreadable. It is something she's never seen from Flynn before and it is making her tremble slightly. He is every bit of a commandant right now and no part her dear friend and comrade. What's he looking for?
Flynn wants to sigh but doesn't. He's giving her the chance, right now, one chance to not betray his trust more than she already has. There's a good part of him that still wants for this to be a horrible joke but that's Flynn Scifo the friend, not Flynn Scifo the commandant.
Behind the ice, Flynn's begging her not to lie.
He's not the kind of guy who sets traps and it makes him feel like the lowest of the low to be boxing Sodia slowly into a corner, but he wants the truth. Even if it's a truth he doesn't want, a truth that shakes him down to his bones and breaks everything he thought he knew, he wants that over a pretty, diplomatic lie. He wants to hear it from her, and he'd have rather heard it from her instead of Yuri, not almost a year after the fact. A year late, a year that Flynn hasn't known a thing, a year he's had to do something but hasn't had the chance because he hasn't had a clue.
Even serious, Flynn never feels this cold. He's boxed up all the hurt and lets the anger freeze him straight to his core instead. He continues to watch Sodia and she looks nervous now. More than nervous, she looks scared. And honestly, she ought to be.
He knows and she knows that he knows and Flynn wants the runaround to be over already, to close the trap and say what he means.
Please, stop lying.
It won't change the outcome but he desperately, desperately wants her to take the chance he's offering.
Flynn closes his eyes and breathes through his nose and when he opens them again, he looks Sodia straight in the eyes and says, so steady that it hurts,
"Please, Sodia. The truth."
Please don't tell me that I was wrong about everything. Please.
That's when it hits her with the force of a hurricane. The words she had ready on her tongue are blown away and she feels as if her feet have left the solid ground. Her surroundings crash to the earth and she see nothing but the commandant's stone cold eyes and her life getting washed down the street to the sewers.
He knows. Yuri lied to me and Flynn knows. Oh god…he…he knows.
Panic, fear, anger, hopelessness, sadness, betrayal, confusion, hurt, guilt; Sodia doesn't know what she's feeling most. She takes quick short breaths, but no air is filing her lungs. Bile rises to the back of her throat and her vision blurs. It was over.
It was all over and it was all Yuri Lowell's fault. He had waited just long enough for her to get comfortable and told Flynn to get his revenge on her. Now Flynn thinks she is a criminal and he is going to hate her and resent ever knowing her. This whole conversation was a trap; it was Flynn standing on a pedestal to get the truth. How could he? He never used his rank before; but here he was decked out in his flashy jacket and his ceremonial sword clipped to his belt to intimidate her. To show her that she was nothing to him.
She sees red now; just like she had that day on Zaude. That was the truth behind it all. She watched Flynn go down after taking that shot to the shoulder (through and through) for Yuri. He had jumped in front of his friend without hesitation knocking him to the side and then had the gall to ask him if he was all right. He was bleeding everywhere and Sodia couldn't take it anymore.
Yuri had run off, leaving Flynn to bleed, to die, and went after Alexei. Yuri didn't care about Flynn at all. All he had cared about at that moment was getting Alexei. So she went after Yuri. In that moment she had decided she was going to get rid of him so that he couldn't abuse and betray Flynn anymore. So that Flynn would stop putting his faith and hope and life in the hands of a criminal.
Forgetting who was standing in front of her, Sodia balls her hands into fists tight enough for her fingernails to cut her palms. Her words hiss out between clenched teeth, dripping with venom. "Yuri Lowell, this is your entire fault."
And at that moment, Flynn doesn't recognize her. He doesn't see his friend anymore, the person who's stood by his side for so long. The rage he sees on Sodia's face is, honestly, a little bit frightening and it makes him wonder how he'd missed it. How could she possess such a rage, rage like this that he'd never seen before? The expression on her face is furious and toxic like poison itself.
It makes him a little bit sick to see it.
"…Yuri's fault?" Flynn asks quietly. He can't stand still anymore and breaks his stance to do a slow, almost predatory circle around her. He hates this uniform. "Yuri's fault. I see."
Flynn forces himself to remain relaxed and not fidget in that shiny jacket or roll his shoulders or show any of those nervous tics that he knew would give him away. A commander couldn't afford sentiment or nerves.
"Do you have anything at all to say in your defense? If you do, I'll hear it now."
Sodia's breathing picks up to the point where she is almost hyperventilating. As Flynn starts to circle her eyes dash back and forth, trying to figure out what he is doing. Where he is going. Flynn doesn't understand. He doesn't know how bad Yuri is for him. He doesn't realize that being friends with a petty delinquent like that ruins his great person. She has to tell him; make him see reason for what she tried to do.
"He's a murderer, sir! He's openly confessed it to you and he has no remorse over it! Yuri Lowell has tainted his hands with blood and heaven only knows what else!" White hot rage takes over and Sodia starts to shake all over, her eyes brimming with tears. She is practically screaming, but her voice sounds so distant. "He has this...way with you. You change whenever he's around! You ask different questions, take time to listen to things you usually wouldn't. You start to think differently and act differently and you don't pay any attention to anyone but him!
"Whenever he is around he's all you worry about and you take his opinions over everyone else's. It's...it's not fair! Yuri Lowell is an insignificant criminal and doesn't deserve a minute of your time so I thought that if he...if he died you wouldn't have to be so worried all the time. That once he was gone you would see how much better your life would be. He isn't your friend at all, sir. That day at Zaude, you took a hit for him and he ran off, leaving you to die! He didn't even ask if you were all right but instead ran off after Alexei to be the hero. He is just using you to get away with his crimes. So I tried to kill him. For you! So you wouldn't be so torn between what is right and what is wrong. As knights it is our duty to get rid of the scum and dishonesty that walk our streets. Yuri Lowell is just that! I was doing my duty as a knight of this great empire and as a friend to you!
"I...I hated him so much. I-" She snaps her head up to where Flynn is slowly walking to her left and she stares him dead in the eye with nothing but loathing. "I still do. He lived and he is living free. I thought you were fighting to stop crime to stop corruption and here he is...a murderer walking out on the streets!"
This time Flynn's grip tightens on the hilt of his sword. His hands shake and his gloved knuckles burn white, but he still doesn't yell. "And does taking the actions you chose to take make you any different from him?"
Sodia freezes. She doesn't breathe, she stops shaking, and she falls to her knees.
And Flynn's heart breaks.
Not with pity, not this time, but shame and a fair amount of disgust not just for her actions but for it taking this long to see. He recoils through the entirety of her speech and wonders how he missed this, because this isn't something that comes out of nowhere and for no reason. She's hated like this for a long time, that much is obvious, and he didn't see it at all.
It takes everything he has to say, professionally and without emotion,
"Jealousy, Sodia?"
Flynn doesn't shout or yell and he doesn't raise his voice an inch. Every word is even and calm and almost gentle, like the eye of the summer storms. He watches her, watches the tears and the fear and the hatred that he can see in her so suddenly now. He watches her drop to the ground without a drop of sympathy, despite it all.
Why did it have to take Yuri almost dying to get him to see it?
Why did it take so long?
"I was shot through the shoulder," he says, remembering the wound with clarity. It hurt then but not nearly as much as this does now. "I wasn't going to die. Had Yuri not gone after the former commandant, I would have never forgiven him for it. He knew that, Sodia. He knew I wasn't going to die. He knew that there were plenty of people who could stem the bleeding. But there was no one else who could take out Alexei; I was in no condition to go after him and Yuri knew it. I knew it. He didn't wrong me; that was how I wanted it."
Flynn refuses to feel pity, refuses to feel bad. He will, later, bad but not guilty, but that's for other times and other places.
"You are an Imperial knight, not a vigilante," he says, watching her without emotion, "It is your job and your duty and should be your pleasure to do well by the people and for the people. I can see, now, that you cannot do that as you are. What next? Had you succeeded, would you decide that killing Yuri wasn't enough? What else might you do to avenge me? I can't trust you any more, not you and certainly not your blade."
The noise from the yards quiets slightly and Flynn waits until it revs back up to continue. He cannot be kind right now but he will not be cruel in excess if he can help it. There was a time where he might have shown a tiny bit of sympathy. Now is not that time.
"If I can't trust you and I can't trust your sword, what can I trust? Your misguided vendetta has brought you here and now it's on me to deal with it. What am I to do with you?"
It's a rhetorical question more than anything at this point but it doesn't make it easier to say. The cold fire in his stomach helps, though, helps numb everything else and lets him be angry just the way he wants instead of being sad.
"One more question, if it's all the same. Just one more." He uses up the rest of what he feels for her to close his eyes and breathe. His blue eyes are stone cold when they open again. "You have all of my attention now. Was it worth it?"
"How can you ask that?! I did a terrible thing and then I lied to you about it and in the end it was all for nothing!" She says angrily. Taking broken gasps of air, the captain wipes her eyes but continues staring at the floor. Formality be damned, at that moment she lets what little is left of her resolve wash away. It might not have been worth it at this moment, but she still doesn't feel any regret for what she did.
"W...when I saw him again I was furious and terrified. He smiled at me and didn't yell or challenge me or try to get revenge. He just said he was going to keep his mouth shut and that I should decide what was right."
He also called me worthless. Which, now that she thinks about it, he's right. She is worthless. She can't even help Flynn see what is right and wrong. Flynn only sees her on the same level as Yuri now; she was a criminal who tried to take the law into her own hands. Why could he get away with it and not her?
She knows what's coming, but her mind is racing and she doesn't want to hear it. "I...I was only thinking about you and the people! He was...is a danger to the people! He was escorting our Princess around and he runs a guild and is a high member in the Guild Union. What if his guild becomes like Leviathan's Claw or the Blood Alliance? A threat to the public well being? He...he had to be stopped and... I thought I could do it. I was wrong...I was so, so wrong. So to answer your question sir, no. No it was not worth it."
She's stalling and she knows it. She's at the breaking point and Flynn's next words will be the grain of rice to tip the scales. She stands up slowly, hanging her head low and unbuckles her sword from her belt. Taking it in two hands she lays its blade across her palms and holds it out and up as she bends down on one knee.
He is going to kill Yuri for this. They talked about it? They talked about it.
Spirits, they would.
Somehow, that's almost (but not quite) worse than the fact that it happened and no one thought that he ought to know about it.
Underneath the sudden spike of fury directed in Yuri's direction (again), Flynn can't help but be the slightest bit relieved when she holds out her sword to him, head lowered and subordinate.
She knows what he has to do and won't fight him on it and that makes air come easier. He's seen his superiors take stripes and ranks from those under the command and he's seen them later, talking about how they'd enjoyed doing it, how they'd enjoyed taking someone down a few pegs. Flynn doesn't enjoy it at all. Maybe it would be easier if it were someone he didn't care so much for, someone he didn't like.
Then again, he can't see himself enjoying doing this to anyone under his command.
"I don't think I need to say much more," he says quietly, "Thank you for making this as easy as it can be."
Reaching out a hand, Flynn takes the offered blade from Sodia's outstretched hands.
"I, Flynn Scifo, Commandant of the Imperial Knights, strip you of all rank and military titles you possess and hereby eject you from the Knights." The words are official and straight from the script and even though Sodia knows they're coming, she can't suppress her flinch. "I want you to know," Flynn continues, suddenly breaking protocol, "This isn't my personal vendetta. This isn't about Yuri as my friend and how I'm upset that you injured him. He's frustrating and I'm sure that he didn't endear himself to you, but he was still a citizen under your protection, even as a guild member under both the treaty and my command. This is no more and no less than any other superior would do."
Sodia gives a low and entirely unhappy laugh under her breath, head still bowed.
"I think, sir," she tells him quietly, shakily, "That even now you're being kinder than any other commander. You forget that I've seen the same things you have. Better to be dismissed than to be killed."
"There has been enough killing," Flynn attaches Sodia's sword to his other hip and steps back, settling into parade rest, "On your feet. Official policy gives you until sundown to remove anything of yours from the castle."
Sodia stands, still trembling and turns around unable to look her ex-commander in the eyes. Her voice returns to somewhat normal and her words are nothing but sincere. "I know that apologies won't do anything, but I will never forget what you've taught me, sir."
And with that she walks away, eyes red, nose running, and throat raw. Her head hangs and her fists are clenched, but her steps are steady and unwavering. She knows what she has to do. She knows where she has to go, sort of. This wasn't over; not by a long shot. She no longer has a job or a home or any idea of how she is going to get by from here on out, but she will figure it out.
And after she has done so, she'll do what she can to keep living for her own ideals. For the ideals she wants to see come to light in this world; the ones she has created for herself and the ones that she adopted from Flynn. Her work was not over.
She knows the commandant is still standing there in the shadowed corner of the courtyard staring after her, she can feel his gaze. Angry and sad.
Look, she thinks, Look at what I have done to you. Look at what you have done to me. Look at what Yuri did to both of us.
She doesn't return to the castle, to her room to gather her things, she doesn't need them anymore. She steps off royal grounds heading down the tiered streets. Not left or right, just down.
And with that Flynn is alone.
He's done what he had to to the letter. Nobody died and it went as well as it could have, but he doesn't feel any better.
He doesn't feel better but he does feel different.
Clean.
To be entirely honest, he's still quite miserable. He's still angry and he's just lost someone he thought of as a friend and he still wants to toss Yuri out a window for keeping all of this from him, and if he wasn't in full dress uniform right now, he might be tempted to hit the local tavern and drink away some of the stress. That never helped anyone, though and it certainly won't help Flynn now. He can live with himself, though.
Flynn won't have to look at Yuri anymore and feel sick, even though he owes him a punch or two for this whole thing. He won't have to wonder whether he handled it the way he should have. He can go to sleep tonight knowing that he did exactly what he thought was right.
He doesn't move an inch until he's sure that he can get back to the castle without seeing anyone. He'll write up the proper documentation but that doesn't mean he wants to explain himself to everyone he sees, to talk about it like he's talking about the weather. It's no one's business but his own and he wants the time to pull himself together before heading down to the Lower Quarter and giving Yuri yet another piece of his mind.
Of course, with his luck this means that he's seconds away from his office when he sees Estelle walking down the hallway with her nose buried in a book. Flynn doesn't know how she does that without running into everything but somehow she manages. Quite well, actually.
Not only does she manage to not walk into the walls, but she looks up as if she can sense him and approaches, seeing him standing by his door.
"Oh!" she says and makes note of her page before shutting her book, "Flynn, hello." She looks him over, green eyes narrowing just enough to make it clear that he's not entirely himself and she knows it. "...are you alright? You don't look like you feel well."
Crap.
Of course. Of course she would round the corner at the end of the hall just as his key was slipping into the lock of his office and of course she would take that very second to look up and spot him. Not that it was particularly difficult to see him with his bright hair and the shiny coat on. It was just his luck.
No, it was more like Yuri's luck, his bad luck that Flynn swears is contagious the way a cold is. All he has to do is be around his best friend for an hour, or less, and suddenly he finds himself in situations that he would usually say "This would only happen to Yuri". He wonders how Brave Vesperia manages to handle it. How on earth did they save the entire world and not die with Yuri's impeccable, horrible, ironic luck?
As Estelle's usual perkiness turns immediately into concern Flynn isn't quite sure what to say. He probably looks about as terrible as he feels. He knows she will find out about Sodia eventually and about the conversation with Yuri, but he doesn't want to go into it right now. He can't handle it; she'll get upset as well and he's already ruined one person's day. But he knows the princess has an uncanny ability to tell when something's amiss even if he looks perfectly normal. It's almost disconcerting, but Estelle is too endearing for it to be taken as anything but simple worry for a friend. She wasn't going to leave him alone unless he gave her a very good distraction. He doesn't have much time to think of one.
Opening the door to his office Flynn puts on his best smile and tries to add a little beat to his voice. "I'm fine, Lady Estellise. It has just been a long day."
A very, very long day and it was hardly two o'clock. Looking down at the book in her hands the commandant makes an attempt to change the subject. "What are you reading about today?"
Not the best attempt at a distraction, but maybe it will give him the time he needs before she starts drilling him and he can't lie to her so he will have to tell about everything that happened and he'll lose what little resolve he has left to face the last couple hours of this day without breaking something.
Flynn looks...well, miserable is really the only word for it. He does an okay job of hiding it, but Estelle's spent too long of a time trying (and mostly failing) to decipher cryptic people (mostly Judy) to be done in by Flynn who's not all that good compared to most people but especially not compared to the likes of Judith and Raven.
Still, he looks as if he could use a distraction and she's more than willing to bite if it might make him feel better. He's not fooling anyone.
Estelle holds up her book.
"It's something I found earlier today in the library," she tells him, showing the cover. "It's about guild mechanics." She smiles. "I thought that if it was interesting, I might see if Yuri might want to take a look at it. Not that I think he's doing a bad job or anything!" she backpedals, smoothing down her skirt with her free hand, "I think he and Karol are doing a wonderful job with Brave Vesperia! He just, um, might find it a good read, you know?"
Estelle looks him up and down, still nowhere near convinced of his okay-status as he'd like her to believe and she realizes that he's wearing the nice jacket, the one with the sparkly buttons and stripes of rank and various medals. That's weird, Flynn hates his dress uniform. He certainly doesn't try very hard to hide it and even if he did, he'd be quite bad at it.
She reaches out a hand and tweaks one of the adornments on his shoulder, taking the opportunity to give him an affectionate pat before pulling back.
"Why are you wearing your dress uniform?" she asks, "I haven't actually seen you in it since the signing of the treaty between the empire and the guilds. You and Yuri both seem to have an allergy to dressing up."
Dammit. The curse of being friends with observant people; Flynn can't get away with anything. He had almost, almost, forgotten he was wearing it. With a small sigh Flynn steps into his office and holds open the door for Estelle to follow. He doesn't answer right away as he takes the jacket off and walks to his closet to hang it back up. Once it is in its proper place, in the darkest most back corner of the giant wardrobe, he works on his belt and his sword.
"I had to take care of some official business which required looking at least a little bit the part of a commandant." He says, not lying, because he can't lie to Estelle; ever. But at the same time he is not entirely telling the truth; which hurts him. He is doing to her what Yuri had done to him, but maybe this way he can kind of get a feeling for what Yuri had to go through.
Even though it is nothing like what Yuri had to go through because he lied to everyone. He lied with words and his actions. He hid his feelings and his pain.
Flynn freezes mentally as a thought strikes him like lightning. Oh…oh no he couldn't, he shouldn't. It would be mean of him; which is exactly why he was going to do it. Because Yuri deserves it and Flynn still needs to distract Estelle so he can compose himself a little more before giving Yuri what he really deserves.
Perhaps he didn't need to toss Yuri out a window exactly, but there were other forms of payback he could dish out.
Flynn puts his ceremonial sword onto its wooden mount and looks over his shoulder at the princess as casually as he can. "Speaking of Yuri, did you know he is in town for a few days? I had lunch with him today."
Green eyes blink and Estelle watches Flynn exchange his jacket for his normal one and set the sword upon its perch. The extra at his hip (why's he carrying two? That is a question that she puts on her mental list of things to bring up when Flynn feels better.) gets leaned up behind the desk.
Innocuous, as if he doesn't want to look at it.
"No, I didn't know that," Estelle replies with the unconscious beginnings of a smile on her lips. She knows that Yuri has other things to do than sit around Zaphias and twiddle his thumbs (bad things happen when Yuri has time to twiddle), but that doesn't mean that she can't be excited when he does come back. She has her own things to do these days but she always misses him when he's gone. "Do you think he would be too busy to see me? I know he has a lot to do, but if he isn't, I'll go pay him a visit."
It's a lot of work running a steadily growing guild and it's a lot of work putting a shattered kingdom back together, but she can do it and Yuri can do it and still have time to socialize. It's more than she expects, really.
Said visit may have absolutely nothing at all to do with the book she's holding, but no one else needs to know that.
Mostly, she just wants to see him and catch up.
Not to mention that she can finally wander around the Lower Quarter without starting a stampede. Aside from her usual duties up at the castle, Estelle makes sure to do regular visits and walkabouts through the rest of Zaphias, to talk to the people and make sure that everything is running smoothly as best it can, see what else can be done. It was miserable at first, starting from scratch without blastia, and Estelle wouldn't have been able to do anything without the support of those leaders, like Hanks, who stood behind her and Ioder to lend their support and aid.
It's gratifying to put the city first and Estelle doesn't mind the bits of damage she can see around the castle, because that means that what's important had already been fixed. A city is its people, after all.
She fixes Flynn with a smile.
"I'm guessing he's likely down in the Lower Quarter? Repede too, I hope."
Flynn nods, the smiling tugging at the corners of his mouth not entirely forced this time. Yuri was going to hate him for this, but that's perfectly fine with him. Yuri deserves it. End of story. He'll say an apology later; to Estelle for getting her wrapped up in this, but he still won't feel guilty about it. Not on Yuri's behalf at least.
Yuri needed this, not just to get an idea about how angry Flynn is at him, but to see the true extent of his actions. He didn't just lie to Flynn; he lied to everyone else; including Estelle. Especially Estelle.
Oh, she is not going to be happy.
Flynn flicks a glance at the door to make sure it is shut and then looks at Estelle. "You know he always has time for you. It's been a while since you've seen him right since you missed his last visit here a couple months ago?"
He stops then, leaning against his desk looking purposefully thoughtful. Flynn might be bad at lying when it came to things about him and his feelings, but oh he knew how to put on an act when it came to plotting against Yuri. He frowns as he puts a hand to his chin and furrows his eyebrows; staring way too intently at the floor.
Estelle cocks her head to the side curious at his sudden change in demeanor. "Flynn, is something wrong?"
Flynn lets the silence stretch for as long as he can before the princess starts fidgeting in place and he finally looks up at her and starts fake reluctantly. "Well, it might have just been my imagination, but he was a little off today. Quiet. He made the journey from Dahngrest all by himself this time and perhaps he's just tired from the journey, but I think he was hiding something from me. An injury, maybe?"
The smile slips off of Estelle's face like wet paint. Immediately, the book gets dropped on top of Flynn's desk right on top of his paper pile, forgotten entirely.
"Oh...oh no. Is he alright? Was he attacked by a monster?"
Unconsciously, she tangles her hands in the fabric at her hips and tugs a little. It's a nervous tell of hers.
"Please tell me he saw a healer- oh, who am I kidding? Of course he hasn't seen a healer." The only people who've ever regularly healed him were Raven, Karol, and…herself. So no, if he was injured, he wouldn't have seen anyone for it. She steps around to the other side of the desk to stand in front of Flynn and reaches out to touch his forearm. "I need to go see him, right now."
She had originally been planning on attending the opening of one of the museums in the Middle Quarter, but that simply doesn't keep any sway when it comes to stubborn Yuri, who now for all she knows could be lying in a ditch somewhere. With his luck?
Estelle knows better than to doubt.
Flynn flinches inwardly, he knows Yuri deserves every bit of what's about to happen to him, but he does feel a bit guilty about tangling Estelle up in his revenge. He never likes to see her worry, but that was impossible to avoid when it came to the subject of someone's health; especially the subject of Yuri's health.
Guilt aside he can't help but feel a little bit accomplished. Not only was Yuri going to get karma smacked, but he can now have a couple more minutes to himself. He needs to be alone right now.
To try and take away a little bit of Estelle's tension he takes her hand and holds it firmly. "I don't think it's too serious, he was just...stiff. He's definitely in the Lower Quarter, probably at his usual spot by the river.
Watching the princess whirl around and make her way to the door hastily he adds quickly. "Just look for Repede, I'm sure he is with him and if not he can lead you to him." I wonder where Repede was at lunch today…
Estelle nods and Flynn walks across the office to hold open the door for her. "I will come down after I've finished up a few things here. Don't let him get away."
Estelle turns before she leaves and ducks into a hurried curtsy of thanks.
"Thank you for telling me!" She calls back and flings up a hand in a wave without waiting to see Flynn wave back.
She'll realize, later, that she forgot her book and didn't even close the door behind her but for now she can't even think about that. All she can think about is Yuri in pain and that shifts into memories from other battles, where the only thing that's kept body parts attached was her healing and she never wants to see something like that again.
Ever.
So Estelle full on sprints through the corridors, ignoring the greetings and exclamations of surprise from the guards she passes in the halls, heading straight for the Lower Quarter.