I still don't own Yugioh, as should be clear without stating it... And to
all readers of StD - forgive me for being so late. I'm still not sure when
the next chapter will be up, but I'm hoping it won't be so very long...
Okay, don't kill me for writing this. It's weird, twisted and brutal. I kinda like it, but I cannot say if the same goes for you. Please, caution in reading this!!!
I've been obsessively reading other's fics for the last few days. And I think I found one author that I like pretty much, who writes depressive stuff right to my taste. So this fic is dedicated to Chibizoo. *nods* Yep! So it is... Perhaps I'll end up writing more to this, but I'm not so sure...
Swirls of Darkness
What... Where was he? All was dark. He couldn't see. Why couldn't he see? Where was the light? What had happened to the light that so generously flowed over the rooftops in the mornings, that faded away to blue dreams in the night? Where had the light gone?
This wasn't night, night had light in it. Night had the glowing moon in the sky, accompanied by those twinkling points of light known as stars. No... There was absolutely no light here, there was no light, where had the light gone? What happened to the light?
He felt like the absolute absence of light was suffocating him. Who knew what lurked in the darkness? Gods, why couldn't he see? There, what was that? A sound? What sound? Please, would somebody tell him what that sound was? Why couldn't there be light so he could see what had made that sound?
There, it came again! What had made that sound? Countless possibilities flew around in his head. There were so many evil things lurking here. He just knew it. How could it be otherwise? This place had no light. It was the playground of evil. What evil? Many kinds of evil. The kind of evil that haunted the night, the invisible creatures chilling your blood. The kind of evil that really existed, masterminds behind twisted plans that only wanted benefit. The kind of evil that waited, waited, waited, knife in hand, to take your life and capture it and twist it any way they wanted. The kind of evil that lurked in the recesses of everyone's minds, waiting for an opportunity to get out, to break the world even further. All kinds of evil.
He waited, sweated, hoped he wouldn't be found. Yes, be silent, so silent nothing can hear you, be as silent as the eternal silence that filled this place, stop breathing and your heart from beating if necessary. Yes, be small, so small nothing can find you, be as small and in the same time infinite as this place, curl up and try to be nothing, for in that lies the salvation.
Why couldn't there be light? There couldn't be light... That's right, there couldn't be light. This was the place of darkness, this was him, this was the mind of all those murderers, all those evil things creeping in the night.
This was him? Was he evil? Was he twisted and bad and condemned and crazy and murderous...? He couldn't bring himself to think on it. No, that darkness might be listening.
In fact it _was_ listening, waiting, gleaming eyes watching him in rapture, enjoying his torment. What had he done to deserve this? Surely no one should go through this hell? Please, would someone please save him from this place where light didn't exist? Where hope shouldn't exist? Where evil things were real and lusting for your blood?
He very nearly whimpered. Where was his light now? He was sure everyone had light, but where was his? What had happened to _his_ light? Had it been suffocated in this terrible darkness? Had his light died in this void, without him knowing, him being able to help?
No! His light was alive! His light was safely inside him, tucked away until he could let it out... Wasn't it? His light, his soul, it was safe? Safely tucked away until he could release it again? Surely he had done so?
A horrible realization came to him. There was no light inside him. There was only darkness, shadows covering everything, evil radiating off of every single inch of his mind, and behind every corner there was traps, waiting to devour the unsuspecting prey. His light was dead. He had killed his light. There was no salvation for him, no eternal afterlife, no hope. He had killed his light. It lay brutally murdered with his other victims. His light was long gone.
How had he expected to survive without light? His light, his hope, the only thing that might have protected him. It was gone. He was alone. Alone in the dark, desperately trying to stop the sobs from coming out so he wouldn't be heard. He was so alone. He had never been so alone in his whole life.
Light! He screamed in his mind. He needed light! Please come back to me, my sweet precious light! Save me from this darkness, those cruel eyes watching me from afar!
He opened his eyes. He could feel how his white hair stuck to his face. He could feel the hard floor beneath his body. He could feel the pool of sticky blood under him.
He rose form the floor, eyes searching for that one thing he knew he would find right on the bed. His light. He weakly walked to the silent body on the bed. Weak sound of breathing came. He was still alive, but barely. Was there still time..?
No. Death was coming, nothing could stop it this time. Trying to keep the uncaring mask on his face, he leaned forward, catching the coppery smell wafting from the boy. Seeing the gaping wounds on his frail body. So pale skin... How long would he last? Not long.
He collapsed on top of his light. He needed light, why couldn't he have light? Where was his light when he needed it?
Right. It was lying beneath him, bloody, weak, struggling to take breath one more time, heart trying to beat one more time. His light was nearly gone. How could he not have seen how much he needed his light?
He could see the eyes open a fraction. A strangled cry was heard in the room, and he realized it was him. He crushed his lips against his light's, tasting him, wanting perhaps to have that light that was fading to himself.
It didn't work, as he noticed soon. Nothing would keep his light from fading. Those glazed eyes watched him without seeing.
How dare the light leave him when he needed it so badly? How dare it go now when he wanted it, lusted for it? He was angry now.
All the light's fault. Why couldn't it be stronger? Why couldn't it stay burning even when the darkness surrounded it? He hated the light now.
He grabbed the knife resting on the bed beside the light and plunged it through the light's chest. This wasn't fair! How dare the light leave him? It had no right to do so!
Pain exploded inside him. His sweet light was leaving him? That wasn't fair! Light should always be there for him! He pulled the knife out again. Blood welled in the deep wound. How dare the light do this to him? He took a good hold of the knife and slit the light's throat. More blood. How much blood was there? There was too much blood, why couldn't the light be gone already? He hated it! Go away light! I don't need you, see if I care when you're gone! Goodbye now, sweet light.
Tears slid down his cheeks. Tears? He was crying? Please... Light, help me. Hikari dear, don't go away, I love you so much it hurts. Please?
He heard how the horribly mutilated body took one last deep breath. Then there was no sound from it. His light was gone.
Darkness reigned. But without light there really was no dark either. Darkness disappeared, leaving only a dead body on the bead.
---
AN: ...Okay. That was creepy. But now that I finally have started writing again, perhaps I'll get around to StD soon. I don't know what I was doing, writing this, and to think I even have ideas for future chapters... Would you please tell me what you think of this? Any kind of comment is highly appreciated!
Okay, don't kill me for writing this. It's weird, twisted and brutal. I kinda like it, but I cannot say if the same goes for you. Please, caution in reading this!!!
I've been obsessively reading other's fics for the last few days. And I think I found one author that I like pretty much, who writes depressive stuff right to my taste. So this fic is dedicated to Chibizoo. *nods* Yep! So it is... Perhaps I'll end up writing more to this, but I'm not so sure...
Swirls of Darkness
What... Where was he? All was dark. He couldn't see. Why couldn't he see? Where was the light? What had happened to the light that so generously flowed over the rooftops in the mornings, that faded away to blue dreams in the night? Where had the light gone?
This wasn't night, night had light in it. Night had the glowing moon in the sky, accompanied by those twinkling points of light known as stars. No... There was absolutely no light here, there was no light, where had the light gone? What happened to the light?
He felt like the absolute absence of light was suffocating him. Who knew what lurked in the darkness? Gods, why couldn't he see? There, what was that? A sound? What sound? Please, would somebody tell him what that sound was? Why couldn't there be light so he could see what had made that sound?
There, it came again! What had made that sound? Countless possibilities flew around in his head. There were so many evil things lurking here. He just knew it. How could it be otherwise? This place had no light. It was the playground of evil. What evil? Many kinds of evil. The kind of evil that haunted the night, the invisible creatures chilling your blood. The kind of evil that really existed, masterminds behind twisted plans that only wanted benefit. The kind of evil that waited, waited, waited, knife in hand, to take your life and capture it and twist it any way they wanted. The kind of evil that lurked in the recesses of everyone's minds, waiting for an opportunity to get out, to break the world even further. All kinds of evil.
He waited, sweated, hoped he wouldn't be found. Yes, be silent, so silent nothing can hear you, be as silent as the eternal silence that filled this place, stop breathing and your heart from beating if necessary. Yes, be small, so small nothing can find you, be as small and in the same time infinite as this place, curl up and try to be nothing, for in that lies the salvation.
Why couldn't there be light? There couldn't be light... That's right, there couldn't be light. This was the place of darkness, this was him, this was the mind of all those murderers, all those evil things creeping in the night.
This was him? Was he evil? Was he twisted and bad and condemned and crazy and murderous...? He couldn't bring himself to think on it. No, that darkness might be listening.
In fact it _was_ listening, waiting, gleaming eyes watching him in rapture, enjoying his torment. What had he done to deserve this? Surely no one should go through this hell? Please, would someone please save him from this place where light didn't exist? Where hope shouldn't exist? Where evil things were real and lusting for your blood?
He very nearly whimpered. Where was his light now? He was sure everyone had light, but where was his? What had happened to _his_ light? Had it been suffocated in this terrible darkness? Had his light died in this void, without him knowing, him being able to help?
No! His light was alive! His light was safely inside him, tucked away until he could let it out... Wasn't it? His light, his soul, it was safe? Safely tucked away until he could release it again? Surely he had done so?
A horrible realization came to him. There was no light inside him. There was only darkness, shadows covering everything, evil radiating off of every single inch of his mind, and behind every corner there was traps, waiting to devour the unsuspecting prey. His light was dead. He had killed his light. There was no salvation for him, no eternal afterlife, no hope. He had killed his light. It lay brutally murdered with his other victims. His light was long gone.
How had he expected to survive without light? His light, his hope, the only thing that might have protected him. It was gone. He was alone. Alone in the dark, desperately trying to stop the sobs from coming out so he wouldn't be heard. He was so alone. He had never been so alone in his whole life.
Light! He screamed in his mind. He needed light! Please come back to me, my sweet precious light! Save me from this darkness, those cruel eyes watching me from afar!
He opened his eyes. He could feel how his white hair stuck to his face. He could feel the hard floor beneath his body. He could feel the pool of sticky blood under him.
He rose form the floor, eyes searching for that one thing he knew he would find right on the bed. His light. He weakly walked to the silent body on the bed. Weak sound of breathing came. He was still alive, but barely. Was there still time..?
No. Death was coming, nothing could stop it this time. Trying to keep the uncaring mask on his face, he leaned forward, catching the coppery smell wafting from the boy. Seeing the gaping wounds on his frail body. So pale skin... How long would he last? Not long.
He collapsed on top of his light. He needed light, why couldn't he have light? Where was his light when he needed it?
Right. It was lying beneath him, bloody, weak, struggling to take breath one more time, heart trying to beat one more time. His light was nearly gone. How could he not have seen how much he needed his light?
He could see the eyes open a fraction. A strangled cry was heard in the room, and he realized it was him. He crushed his lips against his light's, tasting him, wanting perhaps to have that light that was fading to himself.
It didn't work, as he noticed soon. Nothing would keep his light from fading. Those glazed eyes watched him without seeing.
How dare the light leave him when he needed it so badly? How dare it go now when he wanted it, lusted for it? He was angry now.
All the light's fault. Why couldn't it be stronger? Why couldn't it stay burning even when the darkness surrounded it? He hated the light now.
He grabbed the knife resting on the bed beside the light and plunged it through the light's chest. This wasn't fair! How dare the light leave him? It had no right to do so!
Pain exploded inside him. His sweet light was leaving him? That wasn't fair! Light should always be there for him! He pulled the knife out again. Blood welled in the deep wound. How dare the light do this to him? He took a good hold of the knife and slit the light's throat. More blood. How much blood was there? There was too much blood, why couldn't the light be gone already? He hated it! Go away light! I don't need you, see if I care when you're gone! Goodbye now, sweet light.
Tears slid down his cheeks. Tears? He was crying? Please... Light, help me. Hikari dear, don't go away, I love you so much it hurts. Please?
He heard how the horribly mutilated body took one last deep breath. Then there was no sound from it. His light was gone.
Darkness reigned. But without light there really was no dark either. Darkness disappeared, leaving only a dead body on the bead.
---
AN: ...Okay. That was creepy. But now that I finally have started writing again, perhaps I'll get around to StD soon. I don't know what I was doing, writing this, and to think I even have ideas for future chapters... Would you please tell me what you think of this? Any kind of comment is highly appreciated!