Fandom: Kuroko no Basket
Rating: T
Genre: Humor/Romance,
Pairing: Aomine/Kise
Summary: Recipe for disaster: One baby Kise. One oblivious Kise. One reluctant Aomine. And this is what happens when you check all three.
Warning: OOC-ness everywhere, Aomine/2!Kise, foul language (tsk tsk Aomine), shounen-ai
Disclaimer: I obviously do not own Kuroko no Basuke or any of its characters.
A/N: Inspired by a multitude of fanart depicting a mini Kise.
Momoi Satsuki let out yet another exasperated sigh – her sixteenth to be precise, she counted- as she slumped ungracefully onto the park bench closest to her. It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon, nearly cloudless azure sky coupled with a gentle breeze that kept one cool despite the blazing summer heat, perfect for going out to stalk a certain Kuroko Tetsuya with her partner in crime, Kise.
And yet she had to spend the entire half a day chasing a very pissed Aomine around Tokyo. "I'm the one who should be pissed." She muttered slightly under her breath as memories of her stressful morning came flooding back to her. It has began to dawn on her that a good three-quarter of her life revolved around taking care of the boy and taking care of a high school boy who was just as responsible as the sun was hot equated to taking care of one oversized baby.
"Forgive me for being nosy but," a smooth, gentle voice snapped her out of her thoughts, "Why is a lady as beautiful as yourself spoiling your perfect face with a scowl as hideous as the one you're wearing now?"
Momoi whipped around only to be nearly blinded. The man standing behind her had neatly combed long jet-black hair. She was more surprised to see that he was wearing a tuxedo, pin on rose and leather shoes included, despite the heat of summer apparently not caring that he was as out of place in the park as a penguin had business in the Sahara desert. He emitted an aura of golden sparkling flakes which shone like light bulbs. Momoi wondered if he worked in a host club.
Of course she never meant to go around spilling her problems to a complete stranger she'd just met in the park. It's not only very personal but also very rude. So when he asked her a question like he just did, Momoi decided to do what any other person would do, nod her head don a fake smile and lie about her state of mind. The words that poured out of her lips though astonished her to no end.
"It's just that I wish Dai-chan would stop being so irresponsible and start caring for my interests every once in a while." She started and found herself unable to stop. "That guys also skipping practices and matches, causing trouble for the team. And when I try to do something about it, just fix him up a little, he gets all mad and extra rebellious."
She continued to whine citing examples of her childhood friend's brash acts just as well as she could cite the list of Kuroko's favourite brand of underwear. When she was finished, though, she felt a heavy weight being lifted from her shoulders.
"Then," The man said after a slight pause, "Would you like me to change him for you, to turn him into a man that will induce your lovely smiles instead of your unsightly frowns?"
Momoi wasn't sure how to react to this question. She was tied between laughing at his complete cheesiness and bewildered by the strange proposal. Hesitantly she nodded her head slightly and whispered a soft "I suppose."
"Which means you're willing to entire a contract with me, am I correct?"
"Errr… yes?" Momoi answered uncertainly wondering to herself if the man had escaped from a mental asylum somewhere.
"Done deal. We have now entered a contract that will bind us more than just physically, but also spiritually such that we may feel the same joy and experience the same pain. Now, your wish is for Dai-chan, real name Aomine Daiki to become a mature, responsible teenager, affirmative?"
Momoi really lost it at this point. She just wanted to scream and run away, report this weirdo to the police while she's at it. But still, as if drawn by some invisible force, she did nothing but nod.
"Yes, my lady." The man smirked a little at his statement and vanished into thin air. Momoi justified everything she had just witnessed as a figment of her imagination, got up and proceeded to find the nearest clinic.
Aomine Daiki can safely say he's witnessed a lot of incredible things throughout his rather short life on Earth. To begin with, there is the entire Generation of Miracles with their ridiculously miraculous skill sets which were not exactly the most normal thing on this planet.
So, naturally, he was more than just shocked when he came home one Saturday evening to find a fully grown man climbing into his house via the living room window. Not to mention how said grown man was dressed as if he'd just walked straight out of that Victorian era drama his neighbour adored so much she felt complied to blast it on TV every night so that her neighbours may enjoy it too. Plus, he had, slung around his neck, a towel which obviously contained something judging from how this bulge was moving around.
Questions invaded his head immediately and his mouth had a hard time deciding which he wanted to ask first. Finally he settled with the oh-so-classic yet moderately effective, "WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?"
"Your friendly neighbourhood Spiderman of course, can't you tell? This is my spider web." The man replied coolly while gesturing to the piece of string dangling outside Aomine's window.
"Who could tell you dumbass!" Aomine retorted. "And what the hell are you doing in my house?"
The man shook his head and clicked his tongue. "You, my dear friend, are in dire need of a lesson on etiquette, burdening a young maiden is quite ungentlemanly of you. Also, you could take better care of your area of residence."
"Hah? Hey listen here whoever you are I-"
"YOU are an irresponsible high school brat and by the wishes of the lovely maiden, Satsuki, I will teach you to take better care of yourself and everything around you using this." The man said dropping the little bundle around his neck onto Aomine's hands.
'Satsuki? Lovely maiden? Has this man lost his screws? Well judging by that appearance he probably has but-' A sharp squeal caught his attention. The towel in his arms started to wiggle vigorously and tiny little sobs could be heard.
Unwrapping the towel, he found a little blonde boy with large sunset yellow eyes. Aomine felt a wave of nostalgia wash over him but simply brushed it away. The boy stopped his sobbing at once and blinked a few times at the tanned teen in front of him. Then he broke into a gigantic smile. So much sunshine and rainbows was leaking out of the boy it could have transformed the scenery into a meadow.
"The boy will be the judge. When I next come to pick him up, he will tell me if you've indeed learnt your lesson or not. Should you choose not to take me seriously, or fail to reach the objective when the time comes, this is a good example."
As soon as he finished speaking, Aomine could feel a giant surge of electricity hit him as his every part of his body was burning with pain. Feeling exhausted, he dropped to his knees to use the floor as support. His dark skin was, if possible, charred to an even darker shade and his hair stood frazzled. The little boy looked at his with concerned eyes.
"That little guy there is a bit of a shocker isn't he?" The man could not stop a sadistic smile from playing on his lips.
He was halfway out the window when he stopped to add in one more line. "Also the contractor is not supposed to learn of this. If she does it's an immediate "Game Over" for you. Got it?" He didn't stick around to hear Aomine's reply. It wasn't even a question to begin with.
After a few minutes of stunned silence, with the exception of Aomine's panting from that ordeal, Aomine looked at the boy. "So…" He started, "I'm going to have to take care of you huh?"
The boy nodded. Aomine groaned. But he should probably get this over and done with as soon as possible, all that electricity is no good for the body. Damn that Satsuki.
"So what's your name?"
"Kise Ryouta!" The boy beamed, happy to announce his name.
Oh boy.
A/N: Thanks for reading. So this is the beginning to my (hopefully) weekly updated series fic (Sundays maybe). No promises since schools an ass though. I've checked it a few times but there may still be mistakes lingering around, let me know. And note that English isn't my mother tongue. Well spot the references, they aren't exactly subtle. Comments and constructive criticisms will be greatly appreciated.