hey guys! A plot bunny popped in my head again! Here's the result. Also, in the 2012 series Karai is Miwa, THIS IS NOT KARAI! Enjoy! PLEASE REVIEW!

I sat on the couch in the comfort of the lair.

Don was in his lab working on a new invention, Raph was in his room working out.

Mikey however, was absent.

I knew where he was...

He still went even though I told him he shouldn't.

Not until she gets better anyways...

Donnie came in the room and sat next to me.

"He's still not back yet?" he asked.

"No." I answered.

His eyes were still gray and depressing, they were like this ever since sensei had died.

I shuttered at recalling his death, I didn't want to think about it.

"I think I'll go with him next time." Donnie broke the silence. "It'd be good to see her again."

"You saw how crazy she was." I replied. "You really think it's a good idea?"

"Mikey goes practically everyday." Donnie shrugged. "What've I got to lose?"

"True..." I said.

"Maybe I'll even convince Raph to come." Donnie said. "Then we'll all go."

"Yeah good luck with that." I muttered doubtfully.

Donnie gave me a look with a very small hint of competition.

"We'll see." he said as he got up and went back to his lab.

I sat in silence before I heard footsteps behind me.

"What took you so long Mikey?" I turned to face him.

He didn't reply, he just walked to his room in silence.

Sensei's death changed us all in a way, and for Mikey, well...he lost most of his humor and delight.

I decided to follow him.

I knocked softly on his door.

"It's open." Mikey said through the door.

I creaked the door open, walked in and sat on his bed next to him.

"She had to tell me something." he said.

I gave a confused look. "What are you talking about?"

"You asked why I took so long. Well I just told you." he replied.

"What did she tell you?" I asked.

"She told me not to tell anyone..." he said, then he turned to me and his once bright, cheerful, blue eyes, now emotionless and depressing locked on mine. "Especially you Leo..."

"Why?" I looked at him strangely.

"Because she says I understand." Mikey answered as though he had been holding a grudge on me. "She says I actually keep my promises."

His words cut deep, I felt the pain again...

The words reminded me of what she had said when they took her away...

A sharp anger rose inside me that I couldn't control.

"What does she see in you?!" I demanded. "What can she feel safe about telling you that she doesn't with me?!"

"She blames you for everything that happened." Mikey said defensively.

His lip started quivering and he started shaking, but that didn't stop me.

"Why?!" I yelled.

"I don't wanna talk about it!" Mikey's voice cracked.

Tears welled up in his eyes and he started bawling.

My anger immediately subsided.

I had forgotten how fragile his emotions were now.

He was still heavily grieving and the slightest thing could send him on an emotional rollercoaster.

I pulled him into a hug and told him that I didn't mean to yell like that but he pulled away.

"If you want answers you go talk to her!" he refused calm down.

He was in a mixture of anger and depression.

He continued to yell as tears fell down his face. "She was right! You do take it out on her!"

"Mikey..." I tried to say.

"Get out!" he turned away. "Just go!"

I walked out of the room and shut his door.

I could still hear him crying loudly through the door.

"What'd you say to him?" Donnie stood behind me.

"Nothing..." I muttered.

"You mentioned Miwa didn't you..." he said persistently.

"He says she tells him things that he's not allowed to tell anyone." I said.

"Like what?" Don gave me a strange look.

"Look, I don't wanna talk about it." I said.

"And yet you expect Mikey to." Donnie began to frustrate me.

I walked to my room with Donnie right behind me.

I shut my door and left him in the hall.

"You comin' tomorrow?" he asked through the door.

"I'll think about it." I said just to get him to leave my door.

I wasn't really going to go.

I couldn't stand to see her.

She hated me now, and that would never change...

The others don't know what happened, only Miwa and I do.

Mikey confirmed that she still held her grudge on me.

It wasn't my fault!

I pushed the thoughts away like I did every night.

I got in bed and pulled the covers over my face.

I was exhausted physically and emotionally.

However, I couldn't sleep.

Words echoed in my head and rang in my ears.

"I thought you changed Leo! But you're just the same! You know you did it! I know you did it! You're letting them take me away just to keep your dirty little secret safe! You're my brother! I thought you cared about me! I thought you were better than that! But no, you say I'm crazy and convinced the others to believe I really am! That night...you held me back and said it was for my own protection, that he would be safe! I trusted you!"

I got out of bed and took my sleeping medication then tried to fall asleep again.

I couldn't until the medication kicked in.

Then I went completely out cold...

I hope the first chapter was good. Please review and tell me how I did. More chapters coming up! :)