Tears
by Maru
Shisouko09yahoo.com
I wish I'd told you this before. Countless times I've tried, but I always stopped, thinking I couldn't ruin your trust. Yes, I'm a coward. I'm afraid of ruining our friendship. Afraid of rejection. Afraid of losing you.
I should have said it. Then I wouldn't have to keep thinking about what could have happened if I had tried. Will you be mine? Or will you disappear completely from my life? I wish I knew so I'd no longer be in the dark. But I guess it's too late now isn't? Yes, for you'll never be mine. Not now. Not ever.
Lucky one. That's what I call your will-be-partner in life, for that being has your love, has your heart, body and soul. I envy that person, the one you truly love.
As you pass me by, I see your eyes glistening with tears. Tears of joy? Must be, for this is the happiest day of your life. How ironic that today the one that I love is filled with happiness, while I am full of misery and... regret.
My eyes begin to water when the ceremony starts. But the tears never come. I hold them back for I've got no reason to cry. You have never been mine. When you reach the altar and look back, my heart skips a beat. You look at me and smile. A genuine smile. A smile that tells me, ' I'm the happiest being in the whole three Kais!'
I smile back, but I know my smile never reaches my eyes. Yet you simply nod and turn back, never to look around again. Never to go back. Yet in my heart I really hope you will. Just for this last time...
But you never do, for you are happy now with your life and with the one you love. The ceremony goes on without any problems, as if my heartache was never there. By the end, as you unite yourselves with the eternal kiss, I turn my back to leave, for my eyes became misty again. In the middle of the joyous crowd, I try to go. I don't want anymore of it. As I step out and away from all of it, a lone tear flows down on my cheek. I don't wipe it away for I simply have no strength to do it. Just this once, let me feel my tears...
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"...the end." The girl with big eyeglasses bowed and walked back to her seat. The whole class was silent as their professor clapped his hands. The whole room suddenly filled with loud applause. Some of her classmates even cheered her name."That's a very nice one Matsukake-san." Her professor praised her as looks again at her piece. She blushed and lowered her head.
"Where did you get your inspiration Matsukake-san?" He asked her. She stood and answered in a low voice. "I got it from my mother's story. "
"I see. Very well class, that's all for today. See you tomorrow. Oh, before I forget. Please stay after class, Matsukake-san." The professor then arranged the items on his desk into its neat and proper order.
The other students left in a hurry while Furin gathered up her bag and walked to her professor.
He motioned for her to sit in the chair in front of his desk. He then cleared his throat and started his conversation with her.
"That's a very nice story Furin-san. Did you really get your inspiration from your mother? I know you're new here and we still don't know each other that well, but that doesn't mean I don't trust you. I really do and as your homeroom teacher I need to know where you got your inspiration." His long introduction. Furin looked at him in confusion.
"You don't believe that I wrote that story? But Minamino-Sensei I really did write it!" She couldn't believe that after all the stories she wrote, her own teacher didn't believe she made them herself.
"It's not that. I do believe you wrote them. All I'm asking is where you get your ideas from." Kurama tried to console his student. He truly couldn't believe that a simple 5th grader would know so much about the 3 worlds, the demons, the black tournament, and even about the Reikai Tanteis!
"I already answered that. It's from my mother," she said with a frown on her face. "She must be a former Reikai Tantei, but she knows the rule about secrecy. All Tanteis had to swear an oath never to speak about any of the missions they've done and will be doing.'
"Very well then. I would like to meet your mother." Kurama standing up.
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"Botan! Is that really you?" Kurama couldn't believe his eyes. There in front of him was Botan, but gone was the old bubbly Botan he knew. She now had an air of maturity. Gone were the ponytails, replaced with a neatly tied bun. "Hi, Kurama." she timidly smiled.Furin by then was quite confused. 'That's professor Minamino Shuuichi. Why does mom calls him Kurama? And my mother's name is Aoi. Why does Minamino-sempai calls her Botan? If I remember correctly, Kurama and Botan were my mom's characters in her stories.' Furin thought.
"Furin, why don't you go upstairs. Your professor Kura- I mean Minamino- and I will have to talk about some things." Botan said as she lead her daughter upstairs. "Please wait here Ku- um, Minamino-san."
After Furin was settled upstairs, Botan went back to the living room where Kurama was waiting. "I never thought you'd become a teacher Kurama." she opened their conversation as she gave him some drinks.
"Thank you," he simply said. A long pause of silence fell upon them. Kurama then decided to break the ice.
"Botan, Why?" Kurama asked as he looked into her eyes for the answers. She bowed down and answered, "You know the reason why."
"But that's not enough reason to leave us all. Didn't you know that we scoured the whole Reikai in search for a lost ferry girl? Even the Makai and Ningenkai. But we never found your ki. We couldn't feel it. That's when Koenma announced that you were dead. The whole of Reikai mourned for you. We all lost a very dear friend." Kurama closed his eyes to stop his tears, the memories of 10 years ago overwhelming him.
Botan just kept quiet. She didn't know how to answer him. She couldn't answer him.
Upstairs, Furin was listening to all their conversations covered her mouth. 'The stories! They're all true.' she thought.
Botan finally took a deep breath. She had to tell him sooner or later anyway. Knowing the fox, he would never stop until he was satisfied.
"I was made mortal." she started. This brought shock to both Kurama and Furin. Botan continued. "I made a deal with the Fates: I'd give them my powers and they'd give me a life as a mortal. They agreed but I never thought about the consequences. When I became human, the Fates made me pregnant with a child they said would be one of the greatest. But it would also be a bastard, a child without a father. Only the Fates could choose who would father the child, just as they chose me to be her mother. The Fates protected me, that's why you didn't find me. All those years they kept me and gave me a new identity. I'm now Aoi Matsukake, a widow of someone I don't even know. I have a very bright daughter, and I'm still working, even on Earth, as a secretary." Botan then ended her story.
"I know you heard it all. Why don't you go down and join us here?" Kurama then looked at the stairs where Furin is hiding. She meekly stood up and went down. Botan was in shock.
"Don't worry." Kurama said, placing an assuring hand on her shoulder. "Furin is a bright kid. I know she'll understand."
A tear then flowed down her cheek. All those years, she had tried to tell Furin the truth by telling her stories about a certain ferry girl; the ferry girl called Botan.
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"Furin?" Botan said as she entered Furin's room. The room was empty. 'Must be another mission' she thought. She then recalled how she and the old gang reunited and how her Furin had become not just a normal Reikai Tantei, but one of the best Tanteis Reikai ever had. And it all just happened after Kurama visited her 5 years ago...Kurama brought her back to Reikai. She then saw Koenma who hadn't aged a bit. Mariko, his wife was now living separately from him. They had had a big fight and decided to part ways. While Koenma was talking about his failed marriage, Kurama knowingly looked at Botan. She simply smiled and shook her head, 'I'm not hurt about it anymore. In fact I'm sad that their marriage ended that way.' she said in her mind. Kurama just nodded at her thought.
She met all her friends again: Yuusuke, though still a Tantei was a proud father of little Yousuke, his and Keiko's little angel (though he had his father's devil blood), Kuwabara and Yukina, now a happily engaged couple, and Hiei, his secret now out, who was unimaginably okay about the engagement. Well, after he had scared Kuwabara half to death by summoning his Kokuryuha the day he proposed.
'All of them have changed.' Botan thought as she looked at her old gang. But when Kuwabara and Hiei started to argue and Keiko started bashing Yuusuke, she couldn't help but laugh. 'But some things will never change.'
She then looked at the handsome form of Koenma who was laughing with Kurama as Keiko knocked out Yuusuke. Botan smiled. The pain was gone. She had moved on. No more tears for her.
Botan decided to clean her daughter's room. As she cleaned, she saw a book carefully kept under her pillow. It was not a book, really, but more of a compilation of pages sewn together to make a book. As she opened it, she couldn't help but be shocked.
On the first page was a picture of a ferry girl in her pink kimono and her blue hair tied up in a ponytail. She was riding on an oar and above the city of Tokyo. Botan scanned the page and found a story about a certain ferry girl and her adventures with the Reikai Tantei. On the second to the last page was another picture, but the ferry girl was not alone. With her was the devil-blooded Tantei with his Rei-gun, the psychic one with the reiken, the Fire-koorime demon with a Jagan and Kokuryha, the bishounen holding his rosewhip, the lovely ice maiden, the psychic sister of the one with the Reiken, the girlfriend of the Tantei with the devil blood holding his twin, a penguin looking bird, the master of the Spirit Wave and lastly, the handsome boss of the Reikai Tantei.
Botan ran her fingers over the picture reminiscing the old times as she turned to the last page...
"Botan. Are you in there? I've prepared us dinner." Her husband called her.
"Hai! I'll be there at a second." Botan left the book on Furin's bed, forgetting to close it as she quickly tried to think of an excuse to tell her husband about their daughter's absence. As she walked out of the room, the book turned to its last page which showed a very happy mother and her daughter. At the bottom, these lines were written:
The ferry girl once again felt her tears, but this time, her tears weren't bitter for she had cried them feeling love. Now, her story ends as her last tear falls.
Owari
Author's Notes:
I don't own YYH except the name Aoi & Furin Matsukake and Yousuke for I made those names myself. Whew! My very first non-songfic. Sorry if I didn't make them a pair in the end. It's really late and I can't think clearly anymore. Please send me your comments. Flames are also accepted. (Just received my first one yesterday and sorry to say I'm not a bit affected.) I'm just a sleepy kid. Please don't sue me. :P