Sam and I have been dating for 6 months. I love him and he loves me , I think. He gave me a promise ring that showed that someday we would get married. He told me he loves me in Avatar which most people would find dorky but I found it incredibly cute since he was showing his nerdy side to me. The make-out sessions are amazing. More amazing than the ones with Finn and Puck. I know I absolutely love him and he absolutely loves me.
Then why am I doubting Sam?
A week ago, I saw Sam talking to one of the new Cheerios, her name was Ava. I don't know why, but I felt like something was a little bit fishy. They were standing pretty close to eachother. I watched as she occassionally rubbed her hand on Sam's biceps and instead of pushing her away, he just smiled. Or sometimes, he would kiss her on her cheek when he says goodbye to her which is something he does to only me.
Sam wasn't cheating on me, Was he? No. Sam's a good guy. He's not like Finn - I can't believe he thought I wouldn't find out that he and Rachel made out in the auditorium while he was practicing high notes or something -, or Puck. He wouldn't do that to me. He knows my past and he knows how hard it is for me to open my heart to someone, so why should I doubt him? Why shouldn't I trust him?
A few weeks later, around Lunch time where everybody is in the cafeteria, I saw them again.
I was sitting at my regular seat at my regular lunch table with the Glee club, when I noticed the empty seat on my right-hand side. Sam's seat.
I looked around the cafeteria for the shaggy blonde hair boy, not finding him. 'Where was he?' I thought to myself.
"Hey guys... Um, I'll be right back." I tell the glee clubbers who absent-mindedly nod and continue talking to one another. I get out of my chair and go outside the cafeteria doors, searching for Sam.
I stop by his locker first, no sign.
I stop by the window by the football to see if he was there - who knows , he could've been practicing - , no sign.
Finally, I stop by the Astronomy room, and find him.
Not alone, though.
He's seated on top of a desk with a topless Ava straddling his waist, both completely oblivious to the world around them. I want to say something, but I don't because I can't find the words to speak. My breath stops. So does my heart. I feel like my world has just been shattered in just an amount of seconds.
I slowly back out of the room, making sure not to make any noises, and run. I don't know where I'm going, but I keep running.
After a few minutes, I met my unknown location. The Choir Room. Other than the Astronomy room -probably not anymore , though- , this is the only other place where I feel comfortable. I walk over to where I usually sit and take a seat, criss-crossing my legs, and staring vacantly at the wall before me; wondering why.
Why did he do this?
Why Ava?
Why did he break my heart, knowing how fragile I am.
Why did he ever say 'I Love You' , if the words had no meaning to them?
I began to cry. My chest hurt from the deep breaths I was taking while sobbing loudly. I thought I could actually feel my heart breaking, shattering into little pieces one by one and I felt useless knowing there was nothing that I could do to stop it. I brought my hands up to my face and covered it, trying to calm down.
Then I hear footsteps approaching the Choir room, causing my head to snap up to see who the intruder was. Sam. He looked at me with confusion then ran over to me, wrapping me up in his arms. I would've pushed him away if I had the strength.
"Baby, Baby, what's wrong?" He asks me, moving my hands from my face and wiping away my tears.
I felt angry now. I still had the pain and hurt there, but now there was also anger. "Why did you do it, Sam?" I meant to yell, but it came out as a weak whisper which Sam obviously strained to her.
"D-do what?" He asked me, while stuttering. He was beginning to grow nervous, I could tell, and it was because he knew I found out.
"Why did you cheat on me?" I yelled, finally getting my strength back and pushing him away. He looked shocked by my outburst and strength. Then his face began to change into an expression of guilt and sorrow.
"I-i-i.." He stuttered, trying to speak , but probably couldn't think of anything. Instead of saying more, he tried to wrap his arms around me again, but I slapped him across the face and stood up, towering over him.
"WHY WASN'T I ENOUGH FOR YOU SAM?" I yelled, starting to punch at his chest as he also stood up, trying to stop my arms from throwing aimless punches.
"Quinn.. I-I'm so sor-" I slapped him once again as he tried to apologize causing him to flinch, but still didn't let go of me.
I heard chatter as the Glee club began to file into the Choir room, but stopped as they witnessed what was going on. I ignored them and there constant repeats of , "What's going on?"
"YOU KNEW ME, SAM! YOU KNEW HOW FRAGILE I WAS! I TOLD YOU I DIDN'T WANT TO OPEN MY HEART UP TO ANYONE, BUT I CHOSE TO. FOR YOU.
YOU WANNA KNOW WHY?" I quested. He opened his mouth to say something , but I continued on with my rant, "BECAUSE I THOUGHT THIS TIME,
I WOULD ACTUALLY GET A HAPPY ENDING WITH SOMEONE I TRULY LOVED!" Then I broke away and fell to the floor.
After a few moments of silence, someone breaks it.
"Quinn, what's going on?" I heard someone say from behind me, but I ignored them and continued sobbing loudly. "Sam?" The same person questioned.
"I-i-i..." He repeated, speachless once again looking down at the girl he has completely damaged. Quinn Fabray.
"He cheated on her." I heard a familiar voice easily recognized as Santana's. Everyone went completely silent, waiting to hear more from the Latino.
"I knew you weren't that sweet, trouty mouth. The sweet, innocent ones are always the most dangerous."
Sam looked down in shame, not wanting to face the looks from the Glee club, or me, for that matter. I turned away from him, not wanting to see his face. Ever again.
"Leave , Sam.." I say, digging my head into my knees, resting them there. I can tell he's about to protest so I bring up my volume, "LEAVE NOW SAM!"
I can tell he is slowly walking towards the door, walking past me in the process. I can feel him stop right beside me. I can hear him whisper, "I'm sorry, Q." he pauses,
"Nga Yawne Lu Oer" then continues walking, out of the door, and possibly out of my life.
I don't feel anything. Not anymore, nor will I feel anything ever again.
I am fully broken now and...
There's no one who can fix me.