Wendy Darling sat at her computer. She looked out of the window at the stars just beginning to show in the sky, and sighed. It had been three years now. She was fourteen, and growing up, so why couldn't she let go of the past? She had thought that, after she'd started to really get older, she'd be able to forget. Or, at least, to get over it. But she was going to be fifteen this December, and she still looked out of her window every night, wishing.
Forcing herself to look away from the window, she turned her gaze to the computer, where her unfinished English essay glowed. She tried to get on with it, but she couldn't think about anything other than him.
Peter Pan.
She'd been such a stupid little girl! Brought up in a world that, to her, was so boring, she'd jumped at the first chance to escape for a while. Escape into one of her stories. But she'd never realised just how difficult it would be coming back. The pain it would cause her. And she was suffering now, because of that little girl.
Stunned, Wendy realised that there were tears in her eyes. She wiped them furiously, because she had promised herself that she would never cry about him. He would certainly never cry about her. He was a boy, just a boy, and he didn't feel things like she did. He'd always be up for adventure, oh yes, but just sitting down and thinking, talking? No!
Wendy switched the computer off, undressed and got into bed. It was eleven o'clock after all, and she had an exam the next day. After a last glance at the window, she closed her eyes, and tried to sleep.
No one noticed her tears, least of all herself.
Tatatatatatatatat!
Wendy started, and sat up. Fresh tears leaked out of her eyes as she realised it had all been a dream. She'd been flying in the Neverland, with him and John and Michael and Tinkerbell and the Lost Boys. It had been so magical, but it wasn't real. The dreams never were, but each time they left a fresh wound in her heart.
Looking to the window, expecting to see the branch that had made the noise to wake her, she was shocked to see a little glowing light. She nearly fell out of bed as she realised what it was.
Tinkerbell.
"Tink! Tinkerbell, oh my God!" Wendy nearly fell over her own feet as she ran to the window and opened it wide. "What are you doing here?" She was choking out her words now, laughing and crying at the same time.
"Wendybird! We need your help!"
"What? Tink, why? What's happened?"
"He's – everything, it's – oh, Wendybird…"
"Tink, please tell me!" The elation Wendy had felt at seeing Tinkerbell was now fading into terror. Tinkerbell hated her. She wouldn't come for her help unless – unless there was no one else. Unless the situation was beyond magical help.
"Peter is the Neverland, Wendybird, and it's dying. It's all dying!"
"But why?"
"Because he is dying, Wendybird. You changed him. He needs you, more than the Lost Boys, or the Neverland, or – or me."
Wendy knew just how much that last sentence must have cost Tinkerbell. She knew that Peter was what kept Neverland alive, and if it was dying, then he must be.
She felt so weak and terrified at the thought that she nearly collapsed.
"Take me to him, Tink. He can't die. He can't…".
She was cut off by her own sobs. She felt hollow inside. This feeling, the idea of the loss of Peter, was beyond anything she'd ever felt. She would rather spend a million years away from Neverland, rather die herself, than know that he was dead. Tinkerbell nodded and blew hard. Wendy was instantly covered in pixie dust.
Stepping onto the window ledge, she summoned up the happiest thoughts she could. Peter, alive and well, and smiling at her. Feeling like he cared. Cared for her. She took a one long look at the room she was about to leave, perhaps forever, and then leapt into the air.
She flew.
The Neverland was dead. That was the only word to describe it. Before, Wendy's nightie had been sufficiently warm enough to wear as the weather here was so hot, but now she shivered in her pyjamas and dressing gown. The air was so cold, and the trees were edged with frost. Flying as close to the ground as she could, she spotted the huge tree that she had lived in for two months three years ago. It instantly made her feel so at home, that for a moment she forgot what she would find inside. But then she remembered, and shuddered.
Sliding down her trunk was a little more awkward than it had been before, as she had grown and needed to be 'altered' a little, but she fitted just about. Tinkerbell zoomed down after her. She wriggled and pushed and eventually shot out of the end.
The room she stood up in broke her heart.
Everything was the same. He hadn't changed a thing. But the boys were no longer here, they barely believed in any of it any more back in London, and that changed it all. No laughter, no happiness, just a room. And on the bed –
Wendy ran over to Peter. He lay there, looking perfectly normal, but there was something about him. He looked – broken, somehow, and as though he had given up on life. She stroked his dark gold curls and his beautiful face, which was paler and thinner than she remembered. She felt a tear roll down her cheek as she looked at this ghost of a person, and sat down next to him to take him into her arms.
"Wendy…"
He opened his eyes just a bit, and looked into hers. Then he smiled.
"You came back."
"Of course, Peter. You couldn't keep me away if you wanted to."
"I missed you."
"I missed you. More than you can ever know."
They stayed looking at each other for what could have been hours. Tinkerbell kissed him on the forehead, and flew off to her tree. She knew Wendy would help Peter, and that was all she wanted now.
"Peter," Wendy said gently, still unable to look away from his eyes. They were green as the forest he loved so much, and they seemed to bore straight into her.
"Yes?" he murmured.
"I really, really did miss you, you know. More than I thought I ever could. More than I missed Tinkerbell, or the way he forest seems to whisper to you, even more than the lake where the mermaids swim."
"Swam," he corrected wearily.
"Peter… no…"
"Yes, they're dead. Nothing we can do about it," he whispered back sadly. Wendy looked away, thinking of the mermaids who had pushed her around as a child. She had to swallow the lump that rose in her throat.
"Wendy, why… why did you come back?"
"Because Tink came and got me," she replied. At the look on his face she quickly said, "I would have come sooner, only I'm – I'm growing up, Peter, and I didn't know if I still could. Or worse, I didn't know if you'd still…"
"Still what?"
"Still want me," she whispered, the tears returning. He reached up a trembling hand, and brushed them away. He moved his hand up to her hair, and ran his fingers through it, sighing.
"Oh, Wendy. You are the most amazing girl I've ever met, but you can be really stupid sometimes," he smiled. Wendy looked confused, but hopeful. He couldn't mean…
"I'll always want you, you know that."
She couldn't control her heart any longer. The pain, the agony, the hours of tears, they all amounted to one thing: Peter. It wasn't the Neverland, or Tink, or the mermaids she'd missed. It was always, always him.
Because she loved him.
She was shaking, desperate to tell him, afraid of what he would say.
"Wendy, are you cold?" he asked.
"W-what?"
"You're shivering. Are you cold?"
"No. No, Peter, I'm shivering because I'm scared."
"Of what?"
"Of how you'll react when I do this," she said, and before she could lose her nerve she leaned down and kissed him.
And it was the most perfect thing she'd ever experienced.
She was flying through the skies with him, hand in hand, twirling and dancing with nothing to stop them. Nothing had ever made her feel like this before, and she'd never been this close to perfection before. And the best part?
Peter was kissing her back.
They lay there for whole minutes, unable to stop or pull away. It was only when Tink came out to see why they were so quiet that they realised they weren't alone. Wendy blushed as she saw Tink, and sat up quickly, but Peter smiled and pulled her down to lie next to him. He took her hand.
"Thank you, Wendy, for making me better."
"Peter, I – I don't want to go," she said, clutching his hand harder as if she would never let it go.
"Then don't," he whispered, and then he was kissing her again, and she was in heaven again. He was everything, the stars, the moon, the sun, the earth, everything.
And most importantly of all, he was hers.