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To Not Fall In Love

To never trust anyone, to never fall in love, that's what she had told herself. What she lived by her whole life since she was 3, what she told herself everyday in the morning. Because in the end, you could only get hurt, your heart ripped and torn to pieces. She had always told herself that, so why? Why had she let her heart beat fast whenever he came around? Why had she so foolishly given her heart away? And once again, she had gotten hurt. He was near death, and she was in love with him. He was going to die, and once again, it was all her fault.

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8 Months Earlier

She stood, leaning against a wall at the station. She hated all of those happy faces. Jealousy tore her up inside when she saw all of them laughing, being happy. They had something she would probably never have as long as she lives, happiness.

She slowly got up, and took her books with her on the train. Her black jeans dragged along the ground as she looked for a certain cabin. As she passed door #68, she heard voices laugh. Those voices stuck a knife into her black heart, painting it red. The voices of the "Golden Trio", as they were called, reached her ears, and she longed to listen to them. Cyanne found the cabin across from them vacant and sat there.

She sat near the window, sitting next to no-one, alone, yes, alone. She heard the group talk about their summer vacations, but she just stared out of the window, daydreaming. As she watched, two platinum blonds came onto the platform. Cyanne knew who they were, the Malfoys. Lucius seemed to be saying good-bye to Draco, and then Draco climbed onto the train. When Draco was on the train, Lucius stared right at Cyanne's window. Her hands started sweating and her heart jumped in fear as their eyes met. Then, he just turned around and walked away.

"Oh look, it's the Loser Trio," rang the voice of Malfoy.

"Shut-up Malfoy," hissed Hermione.

"Don't talk like that to me, Mudblood!"

"Maybe that's why most people don't like you," Cyanne said without looking away from the window, her voice ringing loud in their argument.

"Oh, why?" asked Malfoy, turning in the direction of her cabin.

"You think you're at the top of the world, when you are worse than those you call Mudbloods. Worse than them, much worse," she said, a bored expression plastered on her face.

Malfoy's cheeks grew red with anger. "I am not worse than those filthy Mudbloods!"

"Yes you are,"

"No I'm-"

"Please take your seat young man," said the lady with all the goodies on her cart. She turned to them with a smile on her plump face, "Would you like to have anything?"

The others shouted out what they wanted, and Cyanne simply said, "Chocolate."

The lady ushered Malfoy into the cabin with Cyanne, shushing all of his "but's". Then, she closed the door and said, "We will be leaving momentarily."

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Draco and Cyanne sat in silence, both staring out of their shared window. Cyanne reached to get another piece of that chocolate bar she had bought, but found it wasn't there. Draco opened the window and out flew the chocolate bar.

"Bastard," she said quietly, opening her side of the window as well and letting the cool, fresh air play with her long, brown hair. Her long fingers grabbed his pale hand, making her own fair skin look almost tan. Pulling him close, she pulled out her wand in one fluid motion and put it to his head. His gasp was quick and sudden, his expression that of a child about to be beaten. Closing his eyes, he flinched back. Then, she wondered, 'Has he ever had anything like this done to him before? Because he seems to know what's about to happen.'

The thought sent chills through her whole body and the shock of it caused her to let go. A wave of sympathy washed over her. So as to not face the blond boy, she went out of the room and to the changing room, to change into her school uniform.

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She came back in her uniform. As she looked at him, she saw herself, when she was 3 years old and she felt a lump in her throat. Memories that had been pushed deep inside were getting closer to the surface. Cyanne sat down and then got back up, to get her ferret from the compartment above Draco. After she took one step, the train suddenly stopped and she stumbled, momentum carrying her forward, and fell onto Draco. His bony knee pressed on her thigh and her nose hit his shoulder, making tears fall as a reflex. She inhaled the strong smell of his hair gel, the clean, just-washed scent of his blue shirt, and the bitter odor of dried blood.

"What the hell?" asked Draco, almost sleepily.

"The train stopped," Cyanne said harshly.

"Whatever, just get off of me mudblood,"

"Be happy to,"

"We're sorry for the inconvenience, the train should start back up momentarily. All students should change into their uniforms now."

Draco slowly got up and it was only when he was reaching up did she see the beginning of a scar that probably spanned his whole back.

In about half an hour, he came back and it was about then, the train stopped gently and everyone got off.