Hey, I am back from a long time of not writing fanfics. I've been really busy, so I had no time to do anything. School sucks, but what are you going to do. At least I'm a senior and going to Yale, so that's cool, lol. Well, you know I don't own anything. (Except this fic) This one is about Negi after he has been teaching at Mahora a few years. Nothing special… except for the fact Negi acts more like a teenager. (BTW, this is kind of a parody, so don't flame please.) Oh, and lastly, I put Anya in this fic because her and Negi have a year old son called Nigi. And this fic is a total parody.

Negi, the main character (I mean his name's kind of in the title), was lying down on the couch of the girls dorm he was staying in. He was an average 15-year-old, except for the fact he can do kick ass Harry Potter magic, but other than that he had messy red hair, glasses, and was wearing blue jeans, black boots, and a white shirt. He was extremely bored that it was Saturday and all the other girls went out shopping for their underwear.
"Damn it," Negi said out loud.
"What is it, Negi?" said a small voice which came from his ermine friend, Kamo.
Negi looked over at Kamo and said, "There's nothing to do. I kind of wish that a small vampire girl or dog boy would attack me, so at least I would have something to do"
"Uhh, yeah. That was last year. Why don't you prank phone call Konoka's grandfather. That's always a laugh," Kamo said.
Negi picked up the and dialed the old mans phone. After about a minute of waiting, he heard Konoemon Konoe say, "Hello"
Negi responded, "Excuse me, is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like you, very homosexually." Then he hung up.
Kamo just stared at Negi and said, "Uhh, did you just call the principal gay"
Negi responded, "There's nothing wrong with gay people Kamo. Lots of people are gay, like Setsuna for example." "Right, well, let's go. I think Asuna and Konoka should be back soon, so we should go see if she's coming by the World Tree," Kamo said.
Negi nodded and followed Kamo out, but not without first taking his staff. Negi and Kamo were just following the yellow brick road down to the World Tree, but stopped because they saw the cheerleaders, Misa, Sakurako, and Madoka standing near a bench. He walked up to them because they were giggling, and he wanted to know what they were giggling about. The first to notice Negi was coming was Sakurako, and said, "Hey Negi-sensei"
He responded, "Hi. What were you three laughing about"
"Oh, Misa just got a new piercing on her belly button from Piercings-R-Us, and we were telling her how funny it was," Madoka said.
"Oh, I got a piercing over there. I'm not going to tell you where but I will give you a hint--it wasn't on my nose or my ear and it was one of my balls," Negi said.
The cheerleaders started laughing and said, "Wow, Negi. You have really become more open and funny ever since you got here"
"I guess so," Negi said. "Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch"
Negi walked away and headed for the World Tree. When he got there, he saw that Asuna, Konoka, Setsuna, and Anya (Yes, I put Anya here because she's cool) were there. He headed over there and said, "Hey, did you get me anything"
Konoka smiled and gave him a bag. When he opened it up, he saw a silver necklace with a silver lion head attached to it.
Negi said, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Konoka, this isn't the Astro Boy glass I wanted"
Konoka started to get upset, but Negi said, "I'm kidding, I love it"
He put on the necklace, and it suited him perfectly. Anya spoke up and said, "Negi, I got wonderful news"
Negi said, "Oh god, I hope you're not pregnant, we can't afford another kid. We already got Nigi, Richie, Joanie, Greg, Marsha, Bobby, Jan, Mike Seaver, Carol Seaver, Boner, Urkel, Mr. Furley"
Anya said, "Negi, those aren't your kids, that's the Nick-at-Night lineup:
Negi continued, "Blanka, Zangeif, Chun-Li, Guile, E. Honda"
She said, "That's Street Fighter"
He said, "Red, blue, green"
Anya said, "Those are colors. Anyway, no, I'm not pregnant. I bought this nice bib for Nigi"
Negi said, "That's great. Thank god we have Eva to watch the baby when we can't"
They walked to Eva's home. On the way there, Asuna said, "Hey, Negi. I'm sure you and Anya can do anything: face any foe, overcome any obstacle"
Negi replied, "Yeah, climb any mountain, rent any video, dial any phone. And not just our phone, other people's phones. Decent phones, God-fearing phones, phones that everybody else gave up on, but we knew better because we were a team"
Setsuna looked at him and said, "What the hell are you talking about"
Negi said, "I don't know"
They continued walking and reached Eva's house. When they reached her house, they knocked on the door. When no one answered, they looked in the window and saw one of the most amazing things in the world.

Well, that's chapter one. If you hate this fic, keep it to yourself, but if you like it, review if you want. Tell me if I should keep on going or how I can make this better. Chapter Two is going to be called, "Eva's Nice!?"