"I can't do this anymore. This has to end." Harry said out of the blue while we were watching TV.
Well, it was not all out of the blue. Harry had been strange ever since I got attacked by some crazy fans outside his flat two weeks ago. I had ended up on the hospital with a broken rib and some bruises. It wasn't the first time I was harassed because some girls were mad at me for "stealing there Harry", but this time they had actually broken something and Harry had gone crazy. He had become so overprotective it was almost ridiculous.

"What do you mean?" I asked my heartbeat raising.

"I can't live with the fear of you getting hurt. It's my fault and I can't- I won't-" he trailed off.
"It's not your fault! You don't control those girls." I began to panic. He was breaking up with me? He couldn't. We had been together nearly a year and I loved him. I didn't care about his crazy fans. Most of them where lovely. I just had to learn when to hide.

"Exactly! I don't control them but when they hurt you it will still be my fault. I can't live in fear of something happening to you. We have to end this before it gets out of control." I looked him strait in the eyes. I traded to see this his way. If this situation was reverts, what would I have done? I would have done the same probably, because I love him, but he would not have agreed. He had not jet told me he loved me, but I think he did? Or was this some way to break up with me so it looked like he was the good guy? No, Harry would never do that. I knew Harry and he did this because he cared about me.

"No, you don't get to make that decision… Or are you doing this because you want to get rid of me?" I had to ask even though I didn't think that was it.

"Of course not! How could you think that? I'm doing this to protect you. I care about you way too much for you to get hurt."

"Like I said; it's not your decision. I'm not afraid. I just have to remember to pretend not to know what they are talking about… and not to answer back." Harry gave a small smile at the last part.

I turned so my whole body was facing him. He sat with his elbows on his thighs and hands in his hear. "Listen Harry. I don't want to go. I want to stay here with you! If I couldn't handle everything I would have left. I'm not this little weak girl you think I am. I can protect myself."

Harry put his face in his hands and let out an angry grunt.

"I don't think you are weak, I just can't handle the thought of you getting hurt. I haven't slept in days and the only thing I can think about is you getting hurt by someone. Please, don't make this harder than it has to be." He was getting desperate now.
"Please Harry, don't do this." I begged. He couldn't make me leave like that. I loved him, I had loved him for a while now and I hadn't told him. I tried hard to fight back my tears.

"Harry I- there is something you should know- I lov-" I broke off. I took a deep breath and mentally prepared myself for rejection.

"Harry I love you. I don't know if you love me back or if that mean anything to you, but I do. I know it is a bad timing and-" Harry brook me off.

"Don't! I don't want to hear you say that. You don't love me and I don't love you, and that is the truth. This will be TO hard otherwise."

Harry said he didn't love me. But he said that I didn't love him, and believe me I did, I tried to say to myself that he was saying this to convincing himself. If that's it, then does he love me? What if he does? We had been together a year, well we had known each other for a year or so, but we started dating four moth ago.
If he loved me and the only reason he would not say it was to protect me, then I wanted one thing from him before he made me go.

"Ok, if you want me to go I want something in return."

"What?" Harry looked suspicious, almost scared.

"I want you to make love to me."

We hadn't had sex yet. We hadn't come that fare but I knew that was something Harry wanted. I wanted it to, so if he was leaving me then this was something I wanted to experience first.

"Wh-what?" Harry stammered.

"I will leave without any trouble if you do this for me."

"No, I-" I cut him off with a kiss. I tried to put everything into the kiss so he would understand that this was only his decision, I loved him and wanted to be with him. At first he froze but soon he was kissing back with just as much passion as I was.

Yes, I think he is love with me. He would not kiss me like this if he were not.

Harry broke the kiss after a while and put his forehead to mine. His eyes were filed with a battle between lust and saying no.

"You are making this so hard." He whispered with a trembling voice.

"It's only because I love you and I don't want to lose you. I want to share this special moment with you before you make me go." I confessed.

"If we make love, you promise to go and keep yourself safe?"

"Yes."

With that Harry kissed me with so much force that I was tumbling backwards and hit the wall. He began to pepper my skin with butterfly kisses. Craving the feel of him, I pushed my hips against his, trying to feel as much of him as possible. I heard and felt the deep rumble that vibrated in his chest as he let his fingers wander over my t-shirt. I was about to take his shirt, when he froze. He closed his eyes and said with a forced voice:
"Do you promise?" I cupped his face in my hands.

"I promise. I love you."

After that it was like a switch suddenly flipped. His hands were all over my body at once. His eyes had darkened with lust and he pulled first my shirt of, and then his own. As we exposed our flesh, we quickly covered one another's bodies with hands and mouths. Harry tried to suppress his moans but fail miserably. Warmth began to fill my stomach and I felt the need growing. I pushed my hips against his a second time. His hissed and pushed me harder against the wall and I could feel his growing arousal press against me.

Harry took a god grip on my butt and signaled me to jump. I tangled my legs behind his back and he carried us to his bedroom. He deepened the kiss while laying me gently down on the bed.

Harry kept kissing me but did nothing to further. I figured he was scared so I took control and removed my hands from his hair to my back, unclasped my bra and threw it away. Harry moaned louder and started to rock his hips gains mine. The feeling was pure bliss, I wanted more. I put my hands on his back and stroke them downwards to his butt and squeezed it before I put them on the hem of his pants. I pulled the zipper down and with his help, pushed them over his knees and they ended up on the floor. He didn't waste any time while pulling my pants of. Harry stopped kissing me for a minute and stared down on me. His hair was sticking out everywhere and his lips were red and swollen. He looked so beautiful I had trouble breathing.

"You are the most beautiful girl I ever seen. Always remember that." He said with a hoarse voice and stroked my hair away from my face. I had to blink a few times to keep my tears away.

"I don't want to go." I pleaded.

"I want you to be safe."

I nodded and tried to remember myself of what we were doing. I could cry when I got home and was alone.

I moved my hands to the front of his boxers and started rubbing his bulge. Harry's head fall down to my shoulder and he bit me to prevent another loud moan. That sent shivers through my whole body. Whit trembling hands he slowly removed my panties and began to stroke me. Now it was my turn to moan and I arched my back. Before he could get a study rhythm I pulled his boxers of and begin to stroke him. I wanted to pleasure him as much as possible.
He soon lost his concentration and the only thing he could to was closing his eyes and rock into my hand. I went a little faster but he stopped me.

"Sto-stop. If you kee-keep doing tha-that, I won't la-last." He managed to say. I stopped and cupped his face in my hands.

"Are you ready?" I asked him while I looked deep into his eyes. He nodded and looked nervous. Neither of us were virgins, but this was still special. I think Harry felt it as much as I did, that this was more than sex. This was actually what it felt like to make love. He stroked my body and positioned himself before he pushed forward. We both held our breath as he went further inn. I was ready to explode. I needed this so bad and urged Harry to go faster. For every time he pushed forwards he let out a small grunt or moan. I couldn't keep quiet and got lauder for every thrust. Harry went faster and faster until he was pounding into me with so much for as he could muster.

It was hard but tender at the same time. It was the best feeling I ever felt in my life. It didn't take long before I felt my stomach began to clench.

"Harry, I can't hold on much longer!" I moaned.

"Ohhh, fuck! Me neither. Fuckfuckfuckfuck! This feels so good! I can't-"

Harry gave a few more thrusts before my walls clenched and my back arched upward. I come while saying Harry's name over and over. Harry let out a sound that was something between my name and a moan. His face had a facial expression that almost looked like pain. He was so beautiful.
When we both had come down from or high we lay tangled up in each other's arms. After a little while I leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek and wisped quietly:

"Goodbye. Don't forget me."

I got my hands and legs free and sat up. If I didn't get out soon I would break down and cry, and beg him to let me stay. He had done what I asked of him, now it was my turn to keep my part of the deal. A thick sob formed in my throat and I had to use all my concentration for it to not get out.

I was about to set my feet on the cold floor, when I felt a movement in the bed. Harry soon stood kneeling on the ground in front of me. His was burying his face in my stomach while holding my thighs painfully hard.

"Don't" he croaked with a muffled voice.

"I have to. I promised." My fist clenched into his hair as he pulled me closer to him.

"It's too late," he responded.

"Just let me go Harry." my voice breaking at the end.

"I can't. Not now, not ever." My heart stopped for a second before it set of in full speed. What was he saying?

"Never?" I asked in a weak voice. He looked up at me.

"I thought I could handle it. I thought that if I convinced myself that it was the right thing to do, that I could save you I would be able to let you go, but I love you too much. I can't."

He loved me! He said he loved me. I couldn't keep back my tears anymore. My whole body got filled with this wonderful warmth and I felt light as a feather.

"I'm sorry I'm too selfish to save you." Harry said while looking away from me.

"I love that you are too selfish. I know you want to take care of me, but some things have to sort it out itself. It will, I promise."

Harry pulled me into a tight hug while burying his head in my hair.

"I love you." He mumbled.

"I love you to. Don't ever let me go."

"I won't."