Doumeki had always been very good at managing his feelings. He had been taught how to keep his emotions under control. He did a good job of keeping up a mask of indifference. Before long, he really began to feel indifferent. Nothing could reach him. And so nothing could touch him.
But these days he was not only having trouble keeping a hold on his emotions, but keeping them from showing on his face as well.
He was getting tired. He was hurting. His heart hadn't ached like this since his grandfather had passed away.
Watanuki was a fool. He really was. He did things without regard for himself and in doing so, he hurt the people he was trying to protect. In fact, he did more damage to them then what he was trying to save them from ever could.
Flesh wounds heal. They hurt while you have them but they heal. And they are only physical. Emotional damage can last a lifetime.
And physical injury Doumeki could take. Emotional pain he wasn't used to.
Yuko was gone, and Doumeki was angry at her for it. He knew she didn't have a choice in the matter. That she had been gone long before Watanuki had ever met her and that it was inevitible that she would be gone for good one day. But Doumeki was still angry at her for it.
He was angry at Watanuki too. He thought that Watanuki had learned from his mistakes and would make better decisions. But here he was, throwing his life away to run Yuko's shop.
Doumeki had heard Yuko's words, of how the people who still remembered her were the ones she had chosen to stay by Watanuki's side. It was obvious how lonely she had been, living out all her days in that shop. And how badly she wanted to keep Watanuki from the same fate.
Watanuki was dense. He didn't seem, even now, to realize that he hurt others with such choices.
And so along with the anger, was Doumeki's pain. Watanuki was his friend. Probaly the only real friend he had. And he didn't want to lose that. But it seemed Watanuki was ready to throw it away.
"The shop still lets me in. But how long will that last? How am I sure it won't dissapear the moment I leave?"
He stayed in the shop. He knew when school started again Watanuki would try to kick him out. Make him go. But he was afraid to. Being unable to reach Watanuki always scared him.
Watanuki was an idiot who put himself in the line of danger every chance he got. Doumeki had feared for a long time that one day he wouldn't reach him in time, and now he feared he wouldn't reach him at all.
"Does he still believe he'll die all alone? Does he really still believe that? Does he want that? Does he think that if we aren't there when he dies, we'll feel less pain? He's a fool."
Doumeki had once lost his temper and nearly hit Watanuki and he was nearing that point again. And this time he might not miss. This time he might not hold back.
"If I hit him who knows what will happen... Yuko could make it so that others couldn't see this shop if she didn't want them to. What if he can do the same? What if he can force me out and hide the shop from me? Then what?"
These thoughts were the only thing that kept his temper in check.
"We've done too much to keep you here."
He thought, "All of us. Yuko, Kohane, Kunogi... and me. We don't want you to leave us behind."He would spend his days drinking on the porch with Mokona. And keeping an eye on Watanuki who would flit about cooking and cleaning and rambling on about how Yuko always liked things spotless. It was as though he expected her back any second...
"Watanuki.... You fool. Open your eyes and take a good look at your life. Please... Before it's too late."
The plea was silent and unheard. And so it remained unanswered in a shop where wishes, when spoken, could come true.
~Owari~