A/N This is just started out as a really short story but somehow became a thing. It was just for fun though so there are going to be plenty of errors.
Post sburb. The trolls and kids (beta) now live on earth. John gets in an accident and Karkat has to take care of him, along with trying to track down whoever hurt his matesprit. (I'm sorry. I shipped… I shipped so hard)
I own none of the characters; they all belong to the mighty Andrew Hussie.
=== Be John Egbert
Your name is John Egbert.
You are currently in a hospital, waiting for the doctor come back into your examination room. You're lying down on the bed after having an x-ray taken of your arm, leg, and ribs. You were also given some serious pain killers too… you think it was morphine, but you can't remember. Everything is sort of fuzzy and you would be giggling yourself to death if it didn't hurt.
As another laugh is choked off by the sharp pain in your chest you notice that there are several sets of eyes on you, most of which are shooting you glares or pitying looks. You can't tell though. Actually you can't see anything clearly.
Speaking of eye sight, there's something missing…
Oh!
Your glasses.
Duh…
No wonder you can't see anything.
Your stupidity makes you want to laugh harder, and you only manage to stifle a giggle shortly followed by what felt like a kick in the ribs.
Why do your ribs hurt?
Where are you?
Right the hospital…
"What's so funny?" you can recognize Dave's voice, "Are you going to let us in on the joke?"
You grin widely at the figure you think is Dave, "I can't see jack shit." Instantly you burst into laughter. You don't usually swear, and for some reason it was hilarious. However no one else is laughing. You quickly put a serious look on your face. This is supposed to be a serious matter.
The doctor walks into the room and dims the lights. He sticks the various x-rays on to the light board to show you and your friends, but as stated previously you can't see 'jack shit'.
The darkened room and the pain killers are getting to you. Your eyes are slipping closed and you can feel yourself falling asleep to the boring drone of the doctor as he tells your friends the extent of the damage. Whatever, he's not directly talking to you anyways and you fall asleep.
=== Be someone else
Who?
I don't know… try being that Dave kid.
ok
=== Try being that Dave kid.
It works
You are now that 'Dave kid'. But seriously who un-ironically called you a kid? Your name is Dave Strider and you are NOT a child. Get your facts straight before becoming somebody else.
Ok ok… sorry
You are currently sitting in a dark hospital room listening to a rather boring doctor talk about your best friend, who just fell asleep.
What a derp.
Your ecto-sister Rose is sitting tentatively in the chair next to you, taking notes on what the doctor is saying… lame, but whatever. You guess someone should be listening to what the man is saying.
Basically John only broke his leg, but bruised his ribs and dislocated an arm. You're sure that it wasn't fun but the man was seriously lucky. The damage could have been worse… much worse. Although you're not sure what exactly happened, you know John had been hit by a car. If Vriska hadn't been there he might have died. You suppose you'll have to thank the spider queen later.
The doctor and Rose were now discussing when John would be well enough to go home. They wanted to keep in for a couple nights for observation. You know to make sure that he didn't have shit like internal bleeding or a brain damage. Even though it's in John's best interest, Karkat will be furious.
You groan at the thought of the troll. You still haven't called him to let him know about John's accident. He'll probably just yell a bunch of obscenities and threaten to tear your throat out you, but you need to tell him his matesprit is ok. You know you would be the same if no one told you and Terezi went missing for a few days.
Don't call the troll.
What are you even thinking? Of course you're gonna call him. Did you momentarily forget what it means to be matesprits or some shit? Jegus that's stupid.
Perhaps you should be someone else for a little while.
=== Be Karkat
You are now Karkat Vantas. You're currently pacing the floor in the kitchen of your matesprit's hive, who should have been home hours ago. You've tried calling but the fuckass's phone is turned off. Now you're starting to worry… it's nearly eight and you haven't heard from him. None of the other trolls still on earth have heard from him either and you can't get a hold of any of the humans.
Walking over to the table you check your computer. There aren't any new messages on Trollian or Pesterchum.
You close the laptop and slam a fist down on the table.
Where the fuck is he?
You captchalogue your computer and lay your head down on the mahogany tabletop. Perhaps you should go out and find John. You have no idea where to start though. John had been at work until five, and then he would have gone to visit Vriska, the spider bitch. You hate that she decided John was her morail, but you hate that you have to share the human with someone else more. Surely if john had ended up missing dinner he would have called.
John never does anything without telling you, not after the game anyways.
You shake away the unpleasant memories associated with that game that is long over. You won and now you're here… with him. That's all that matters.
The clock on the stove reads 8:45.
"That's it!" you snarl at the table. Pushing back your chair you stand up, "Damnit! I'm going find you and I swear to Gog there will be hell to pay for this Egbert!"
You're on your way up the stairs to grab your sickles when your phone rings. Quickly you scramble through your sylladex and end up dropping a few of your captchalogue cards, effectively scattering several items across the staircase.
Fuck.
Ignoring the new décor on the steps you grab your phone. Honestly you're shocked to see that Strider of all people is calling you. You two tend to avoid each other seeing as he's an insufferable prick.
"STRIDER, WHAT THE TAINT CHAFFING FUCK DO YOU WANT? I WAS JUST ON MY WAY TO MURDER THAT IDIOT YOU CALL YOUR BEST FRIEND. JACKASS HASN'T CALLED ME YET."
"Well good news Karcles, I know where you can find him."
"AND EXACTLY WHERE IN THE HELL WOULD THAT BE?"
"Are you sitting down now?"
"NO… WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON DAVE?"
"Uh, you might want to take a seat and try to keep calm. Before you flip your shit, John is ok. He's alive and breathing- "
"THE FUCK IS GOING ON STRIDER? WHERE IS JOHN?"
"Calm your tits. We're at the hospital. There was an accident."
"WHA-"
"Before you say another word, John is fine! Jade is on her way to pick you up and bring you here to see him. I suggest you keep your shit upright, if you flip it in front of her she'll leave you at home. See you soon."
"DAVE, DON'T YOU DARE HANG UP! DAVE FUCKING STRIDER! JEGUS! YOU'RE LUCKY YOU'RE AT THE HOSPITAL BECAUSE I SWEAR I'M GOING TO RIP YOUR THROAT OUT WHEN I GET THERE!"
You continue to rant at the phone in your hand. Threats and obscenities spill from your food hole like it's fucking Niagara Falls.